What Do You Think About Naming Rules?

Updated on November 02, 2011
J.G. asks from Portland, OR
44 answers

So here's the deal. My husband and I are expecting our second child soon. It will be our last. We've always loved the name Kate, but our niece's name is Kaitlyn. She's never gone by Kate, and has a different last name than ours. Would it be wrong to name our daughter Kate because it's too similar to Kaitlyn? She lives 2 hours away and we see her about 4-5 times a year. Not that it matters, but my brother and sister-in-law knew we loved the name Kate when they named her Kaitlyn. I'd love to hear your thoughts! Thanks in advance.

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So What Happened?

Wow! Thanks, Mamas! I feel so much better about it after reading your responses. I agree with all of you, I just wasn't sure if I was being "out there." Thanks for the congrats, too!
XOXO

Featured Answers

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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

I think Kate is fine - don't know if you were thinking just Kate, or something like Katherine, then Kate for short. But I wouldn't say anything to anyone and keep it under wraps until it's on the birth certificate. Just in case someone says something negative and you start thinking you have to pick something else.

4 moms found this helpful

K.L.

answers from Medford on

You better name that baby Kate and let us all know when she is born.
George Foreman named ALL of his kids George. Even his daughters.
In my father-in-laws family everyone who had boys named them William and Robert. A family reunion was interesting to say the least. Bill, Bob, Billy, Bobby, Will, Rob. You name it, there were dozens of them. It made for fun times and great stories.
I had a man named Kenneth who lived next door. He was called Ken. He and his wife named their son Kenneth and called him Ken. Thier daughter grew up and married a man named Ken. Somehow they always knew who they were talking about.

4 moms found this helpful
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E.M.

answers from Honolulu on

There are 7 Davids in my family. I am one of 3 Elizabeths.... Same middle and last name so I guess I don't see the issue...

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

T.N.

answers from Albany on

There are seven Michaels in my immediate family. How can you go wrong with Michael?

I love every version of Kate. My daughter's name is Margaret Katharine because I love both names equally and knew she'd be the only girl.

Sorry, but I have to say this. My 3 yr old Golden Retriever's name is Kate. Only cuz I didn't get the second girl to name Kate. tehehe

In some families it's customary to repeat names, even honorary, you know?

I REALLY hope YOU have a Kate, it'll make ME feel better anyway!

:)

5 moms found this helpful

H.G.

answers from Dallas on

I love kate! Name her that or you will regret it! Good luck mama!

4 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Kate is a wonderful name!
Go for it!

4 moms found this helpful
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D.N.

answers from Chicago on

I have a nephew named Daniel and we are going to name our son Daniel when he is born soon. Different last name so no conflict there. We like the way it sounds with our last name and makes the name seem strong but not overpowering which is what we want. Choose what you like. We just decided last month too so I am not changing it no matter what anyone thinks. The poor kid was going to be able to choose his own if we hadn't figured it out soon. :)
I also have a friend that is Kristen, her mom's nephew is Christopher and dad's nephew is Christian. They all go by Chris/Kris.

3 moms found this helpful

E.M.

answers from St. Joseph on

I say name your child what you want to name her!! we had all boys, but one name I have loved for a girl is Isabel, like it way before the whole twilight thing, LOL. But, my husbands sister gave her daughter the name Isabel for her middle name so my husband always said we couldnt use it. I was like, that is bull, we can name our child anything we want. especially since it was used as a middle name and same as you, different last name, different schools etc. Name her Kate if you want to name her Kate!!

3 moms found this helpful

R.A.

answers from Providence on

Kate is a classic name. This is your child, and the name that you both love. Use it! Enjoy, and congrats to you and your husband!

3 moms found this helpful

C.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Name your baby what you like. Everyone will survive. :)

3 moms found this helpful

C.P.

answers from Columbia on

There are no rules. Name your baby whatever you want, however you want.

If more than one couple in a family loves a name, who cares? Name your baby Kate. The baby will be loved regardless.

3 moms found this helpful

M.B.

answers from Orlando on

I think it's fine! People get so worked up about names but in the end it's your baby and you can name her whatever you want! Just as an example in my family I have 2 nieces both named Hailey and Haley :)

3 moms found this helpful

E.S.

answers from Dayton on

Name her Kate!!!
In our family we have (not mine) Aidan and Caden.
Two cousins w/ the middle name Louise.
And 3 cousins w/ Elizabeth as some part of their name (one mine). ;)
And I have a aunt who wants to name a un-conceived DD Sarah and we already have one of those too.
If you love Kate, and they knew you loved Kate...you should name her what you love. :)
Congrats!!!

3 moms found this helpful
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S.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

Nope nothing wrong with it. I have a cousin named Shauna (same last names till we got married). And another cousin whose first name is my middle name. And my first and middle names are both my aunts names. It's all good :)

2 moms found this helpful

R.R.

answers from Los Angeles on

It's fine, and Kate IS a very pretty name.

Something similar happened when I was born, my parents named me R.. 2 months later my dad's cousin and his wife who lived on the same block had a daughter and named her Rosemarie. (We had different last names as well.) My mother told me as I got older that she had been furious, because the cousin's wife had gotten the idea from her (my mom got it from a book she was reading) and stolen the "Rose." I thought this was funny, it never bothered me, even though we went to the same schools from K - 12, there were never any problems.

Congrats on Kate : )

2 moms found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Kate and Kaitlyn are two completely different names. It's also one of my favorite names - my mom is Kate, my eldest daughter is Kate, MY middle name used to be Kate until I dropped it after I got married, BOTH my nieces have Kate as their middle names. So "Kate" is a pretty popular name in my family. Never, not once, have any of us associated "Kate" with "Kaitlyn". Go ahead and name your daughter Kate. Congrats, btw!

2 moms found this helpful

L.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I see no problem with that whatsoever.

2 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

I could see close family, though even that has never stopped my family. In my one uncle's family there are three children and three grandchildren named Christine. I have a Christine. What can I say our family likes the name. :)

I do think it is awkward to use the same name as a niece or nephew but I think that comes from my son being a fifth. You say Tom there is no telling who you will get. :(

2 moms found this helpful
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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

2 moms found this helpful
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B.C.

answers from Joplin on

With my third child I thought I was set on a name, even filled out the birth certificate. Before I left the hospital I changed my name...he was not a Luke at all, blame it on pregnancy hormones or general indecisiveness but I made two phone calls, one to Andy and one to my sister....I ended up naming my third child Alexander, I called my sister for an ok because her second daughter is Alexis and we DO see them a lot....but her daughter does not go by Alexis anyway...she was totally ok with it, I think mostly because she was not a fan of the name Luke LOL...Andy was fine with it as long as we kept the same middle name. Name your child what you want.

2 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

Name her whatever you want to name her....doesn't matter!!

My sister's family has 4 Anthony's, 3 Michael's and 2 Caroline's...it all works out.

I never thought there were "rules" - it's my kid and I will name him or her what we want...there are no "dibs" or anything like that in my world!!

2 moms found this helpful
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K.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

Name your child whatever you want! I know most parents don't like to use similar names but if it's a name you want to use, so be it. Use it! There are no rules.

K. B
mom to 5 including triplets

2 moms found this helpful
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K.L.

answers from Washington DC on

I love the name Kate (probably b/c I've always gone by K., and only my dad calls me Kate so it's special) As far as your brother's daughter goes, I would just call your brother and mention your plan. He'll probably be all "whatever!" if he is like any other man I know. Actually, we named our first daughter Tyler which is my brother's middle name. I let him know about it beforehand b/c I was a little worried about how he'd feel that we were naming a GIRL with his middle name. He couldn't care less, and I think he actually likes that his niece is sort of named after him! Congrats on your new little girl when she arrives :)

1 mom found this helpful

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

If you love the name Kate, name her Kate. Or, if you want her full name to be a little more different than your niece, name her Katherine and call her Kate.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Memphis on

I am a little late, but as a K., I say go for it. I think K. and Kaitlyn are different enough. There aren't that many Kates, more Katies, Kaitlyns and if you are not using it as short for another name (actually naming her K.) there are even fewer of us so we would love to welcome her to the club. :-)

I have a cousin who named his daughter Katie, I don't see them often but it's never been a problem.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.M.

answers from Washington DC on

In our family there are many Sams. Girls and boys.
So it's Suzie's Sam or Linda's Sam or Sam Smith, you get the picture. No one thinks twice about it.

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M.S.

answers from Seattle on

I think it's fine. In my family, we had a couple of sets of same names because we were named after people. We were first cousins and spent a good deal of time together. When we were together, other times as well, but always when we were together, I was Mary Kay and my cousin was Mary Margaret. One of my sisters was Christine and she always went by Dean (In fact I've never called her anything BUT Dean or Deani) and our cousin was Christine and went by Christine. They both go by Chris, now. Well except my siblings and I still call our sis Dean, although all of our children call her Aunt Christine! Weird, I know.

L.M.

answers from Dover on

You say your and your hubby have always loved the name Kate. If that is still the case, I would name her Kate. It is hard to get "the right name" and both agree.

I have always loved the name Matthew James and Cheyenne Nicole. With my son, his father decided he wanted a junior after I decided on Matthew James (before that he was adament that he did not want a jr) so I gave in since I had offered that up first. Then, my husband want something besides Cheyenne Nicole. He threw out all kinds of names (some were horrible and some just weren't right). He was not set on any one of them. We ended up compromising and naming her Madison Cheyenne but calling her Cheyenne. I really wish I had name my children what I really wanted because I feel they don't have the "right" name.

L.G.

answers from Eugene on

Name her Kate. She is her own person. Kate stands for Kathleen, Caitlin, Kathryn, Katrin, Katrina, Catherine as a nickname. So what if she is Caitlin or whatever can be Kate as a nickname. Kate is what you want to call your daughter.

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M.W.

answers from San Francisco on

Don't worry about what everyone else is doing or did. It is your baby and your own little family...you and your husband make the name choice. If anyone gives you guff just let it roll off your backs with a smile.

I vote for Kate!!

Good luck and best wishes!!

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Name your baby whatever you want. Kate is very different from Kaitlyn.
So I say Kate it is. I have a special place in my heart for Kate. My daughter
is Kathleen. When she was born the three older ones asked about a nick
name and thought Kate was nice. They tried but it never stuck. However,
I loved it. He nickname is Leni and at work because there are Kathleen,
Katherines, Cathy, she is KMAC.

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R..

answers from Chattanooga on

My cousin, and my BFF for over 20 years, is named Kristin. My name is Christina. There was some confusion once in a while, when we both went by Chris (or Kris... lol) and were constantly together. But it really wasn't a big deal... more like a joke. I say go for the name you like. If they get offended about it, that's their problem.

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S.C.

answers from Seattle on

I tried to avoid duplicating names(we have a huge extended family). Thought I had it all figured out. Found out later that my cousin's oldest daughter's name is very close to my daughter's. I hope she wasn't offended, but I agree that no one 'owns' a name. If you love Kate, then Kate it should be!

BTW: Cousin's daughter is Elyse and my daughter is Elisa.

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C.B.

answers from Seattle on

It'll be fine! Just wait, you'll see! I have a neice, a sister, and a best friend that all have the same exact name. And my sister's best friend has the same name too. It works just fine. We can usually tell who we're talking about by context but it doesn't really impede the conversation when someone needs clarification. Then we break out, "Big So-and-So" or "Little So-and-So" or "Aunt So-and-So." And they think it's kind of cool! Besides, with a common name, you may run into that problem anyway. Both my sister (who shares the name) and I have best friends that also share the name. No way around that! So you might as well give her the name you love!

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M.S.

answers from Portland on

Please name your child the name you have always loved. It makes no difference that another child in the family has the same name. Everyone will be fine with it including the kids.

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W.C.

answers from Seattle on

Name your child what you want. You will only have one daughter and you should name her what you want. You will be saying her name for the rest of her life. I named my daughter after my grandmother and not only does my heart smile for my daughter when I say her name, but it smiles for my grandmother. Name her what you want.

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K..

answers from Phoenix on

No one has ownership over a name, end of story. Name your child what you wish. Anyone who has anything to say about it needs to grow up.

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J.C.

answers from Seattle on

I don't know that there are actually "rules"...in Jewish tradition, it is possible for many people to have the same name in a family because you name after people. Why not just ask Kaitlyn's parents if they would be bothered by it...If they are, you can either still use it (which may or may not result in drama) or choose another name - there are plenty out there!

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L.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Name her Kate! Its beautiful~ There will always be someone else in the world who loves the names you do, so if you feel your child is best suited as Kate, name her Kate! Congrats!

M

B.B.

answers from Dallas on

I didn't know there was rules in naming your own children..

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

It wouldn't matter if you wanted to give your child a name that was identical to her cousin's. It's YOUR child, name her what YOU want to name, her, and cordially invite anyone who objects, to sit down and STFU.

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S.C.

answers from Des Moines on

Name your kid whatever you want! I grew up with a brother John and a cousin Johnathan (who went by Johnny) It's not that confusing! (And now I have a step brother John too-- still not that confusing!) My mom and her cousins all had unique names-- then they grew up and SIX of them married Davids! So even if you start out with a uniqulely named family it doesn't mean you'll end up with one!

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L.R.

answers from Portland on

If it would make a difference, ask Kaitlyn's folks how they feel about it. You could also consider a slightly different spelling, like Cate.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

After my DD was born, my oldest nephew had a baby with a woman with the same name. We refer to her as "Tall FirstName" because DH thought "Big" just seemed wrong. And most of the time my DD goes by an even shorter nickname that isn't the same at all. I think that if you love the name, go for it.

My DH's side also has the male and female versions of the same name on kids that are a year apart. It's never been an issue.

Almost forgot about the Bobs. I even married into a family with a few more!

If you call her "Katie" look up Katy by Tom Paxton. Adorable song.

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