What Do You and Your Hubby Do to Go "Out for the Night" Other than Dinner?

Updated on April 14, 2011
J.A. asks from Schenectady, NY
30 answers

ok- first- yes for those of you keeping score, I have had a lot of questions lately, but as my impending baby #2 gets closer, my mind is racing!

second- before I get a bunch of "we just stay in and ship the kids out and use the time to 'reconnect'" answers to this question (which I do enjoy- don't get me wrong) I am looking for out of the house activites! :)

So my question is- my husband has two best guy friends and the three of them could hang out 3-5 days a week and just sit around, watch sports and chat it up. I don't mind usually and he has matured enough now where when it starts to get a little much, he adjusts the time on his own- which is AWESOME!! (no more stupid fights over that one!) I- on the other hand- don't have any girl friends. I have tried and the ones that I know that have kids my son's age are too busy with their families, own children, church, other friends etc and we find ourselves getting together once every 2-3 months and it is such a hassle. I wish my two best girlfriends or my sister lived close but they don't so I just enjoy my time with my husband and my son and spend a surprising amount of time with my in-laws because they are cool and love my son and my husband and feed us on occassion and are fun people to talk to!

My problem is this- when my husband and I decide to spend the money and the time to go out, we generally will find a vew place to eat and then have no idea what else to do. We aren't bar people, we don't like dancing of any kind really, and we can never agree on a movie! So we generally will go out for dinner and then I will go pick up our son and he will go hang with the guys for a couple hours and that is our evening.... So what do you do when you and your hubby go out?
Wow- you can tell I'm bored by how long this question is!!

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answers from Detroit on

I love going to a comedy club. Sip on and drink and laugh is always fun for us. We only do it once or twice a year, but I love to go there.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

We usually go to the beach and go for a walk or sit there and watch the waves. We aren't really movie people, and don't like to spend a lot of money just so that we can get out of the house. Sometimes we will go to a coffee shop and split a piece of cake too!! YUMMY

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

My husband and I spend a lot of time going to bookstores with cafes in them. We sit and have coffee and talk, and walk around looking at books, and read at a table together. It's nice because we really don't spend any money except for coffee (and maybe dessert) at the cafe, and sometimes the occasional book if we find something we like. It's a nice, quiet, peaceful time that doesn't cost that much.

1 mom found this helpful

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answers from Richmond on

LOL I'm glad your guy is making more time for you! Score one for the wife!

Other than going out to eat, we visit museums, take walks along the river, or if we're REALLY lucky and have a few hours, we load up the canoe and take a day trip down the river.

Other cheesey ideas (think 'high school date') you could go bowling, play putt putt golf, race go-carts, rent beach cruiser bikes and take a scenic ride, go hiking, play pool or darts, or go to the gun shooting range (seriously, I HATE guns, but it was some of the most fun I've ever had!)

HAVE FUN and congrats on #2!! :)

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Minneapolis on

comedy club, concert...our last night out we went clothes shopping! It was nice not to have kids getting crabby and to be able to get each others opinions.

As far as making friends...I've met many moms through my son's daycare. Maybe initiate a mommy's night out. ...or my neighborhood started a ladies bunco night.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Sherman on

I am glad you asked because i just had the most lovely anniversary! Grandma took baby and hubby and i went for a motorcycle ride, met some friends for lunch, then just went shopping for some little things he needed together, then we had a lovely dinner.
I know you said no dinner, but it was only part of the day. the best part was all the personal attention we gave each other!
Much Needed!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

My husband and I do the dinner thing, but a few fun things we've done that aren't your typical dinner and a movie are:

- gone to an arcade and played video games (I STINK! Trust me! It's more about something silly and fun and a great memory, plus even though I'm terrible I love to talk trash and banter back and forth)
- go ride go-carts (this can usually be done at the same place as the video games)
- laser tag (TONS OF FUN!!!!)
- Paintball
- Comedy Club (even if they are local comics and it's terrible it's still fun)

That's all I've got for now. Like you, we aren't bar people or club people at all, but these are silly fun alternatives. If you could find a place to play pool that doesn't stink of stale cigarettes that can be fun too, but it's hard to find a no-smoking pool place although here in VA they just passed a no-smoking law so we might be in luck from here on out.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Norfolk on

We used to go play NTN trivia a lot. It is usually in a bar or restaurant. Lots of fun! We have also just gone to a bookstore and browsed around. You could get some coffee at the bookstore coffee shop (I'm thinking of Borders or Barnes and Noble here) and hang out and look at books. Um, bowling maybe? Now I'm trying to think of fun dates...I answered another question with "indoor rock climbing," which is really cool. Maybe you could take a cooking or wine class together?
**edited to add: Maybe you could buy an Entertainment Book? There's usually lots of activities in there if you want ideas, and then you'd be saving money, too.**

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Albuquerque on

Where we live there are a lot of casinos, sometimes we each take $20 and play the slot machines. We also go bowling, minature golfing and we love rodeo so we recently went to the Ty Murrry invational when it came to town. Something that is really cheap & fun is to go to a high school football/basketball games ( we live in the same state we both went to high scool in so we both have "teams" that we are rooting for)


answers from Kalamazoo on

Comedy club or a cool show like Blue Man Group if you have a place nearby.


answers from Rochester on

We usually think of a movie at the dollar theater unless there's something we both really want to see (we have very similar movie tastes, so if there is a fun action movie or foreign film by someone we like, we might try to see that). We have had the most bizarre anniversary/date movies (Hannibal Rising, Sweeney Todd, Shutter Island, Pan's Labyrinth, etc.).

Since dates are so rare for us, we usually end up deciding to just hang out because you can't talk during a movie. There is a really big and fun to browse Barnes and Noble in our area that is open really late, so we end up going there and hanging out and looking at books and talking. If we each end up buying a paperback or something it is still cheaper than a movie and popcorn.

Instead of dinner, sometimes we just go out for a really fancy dessert and drinks. If I eat a conservative dinner earlier I don't feel bad having a whole piece of torte myself and a liquored-up coffee.


answers from St. Louis on

How about a baseball game, hockey game or football game? There is a ton of stuff to do in STL. You could try Steinberg rink in the winter or Hidden Valley. In the summer the Zoo has later hours. You can go without your child and just walk around. What about just a walk through Forest Park or around down town to look at the sites. You could go to some place like Swing Around Fun Town :) to play putt putt or drive the go-carts. Have fun and be a kid again. Try something new. I'm sure there is a place that you can go climb a wall after diner or even before. You could do a dinner cruise down/up the river. I know there is a mystery dinner place, but I don't know the name of it. How about they FOX, Muny, or even the symphony. If I can think of anything else off the top of my head I'll let you know.


answers from Detroit on

Bowling, lazer tag, museum, billiards <-- For cold weather.

Putt putt, local car shows, walk through the park, zoo (yes, even without the kids) <-- Spring or summer activities



answers from Fort Wayne on

We generally go out to a bar. Doesn't sound like that's something you would be interested in though :)

Sooo....do dinner and a movie. One time you get to pick the movie and next time he gets to pick. What about going to a sporting event together? My husband is a big baseball fan. Me, not so much..but we have a minor league team near where we live. We try to go to a few games a year. It's a lot more fun than I thought it would be :)



answers from Wichita on

We go to the book store but we choose one that also has music. My husband gets to sample the cd's and I browse the books. It's not "together" time but after dinner it's nice.


answers from Bloomington on

Some of the different things we've done while out:
Go to the driving range to hit golf balls, antique store to look around, fishing, play catch or go to the batting cages, horse back riding, minor league baseball game, browse the bookstore...
We usually like outdoor activities. Just think of something you both like or take turns.



answers from St. Louis on

there are many places here....the city museum used to have 1/2 price Friday nights and the science center had a free friday night, the zoo has some extended hours. how about lunch and a trip to kimmswick to walk around or st. charles, st. genevieve....What about you pick the movie on time and he picks the next...some of the high schools have plays/musicals and they are cheap and the ones I have been to are fairly good. Rent some movies and stay at home glass of wine take out chinese and of course popcorn...pack a picnic and go to a new park..take in a concert in the park. usually one night during the week. go online and look for things going on in your area be a tourist for a day. get in the car and drive. stop at places that look interesting. A friend and I did this and found many fun places, resale shops, specialty craft stores...a cup of coffee, breakfast, an early morning walk find a trivia nigh and ask another couple to go....hope these ideas help or that it gets you thinking of other things you can do...have fun...


answers from Dallas on

We've had a weekly date night ritual since we met and have not missed many in our almost 23 yrs of marriage. We feel it is vital to the relationship.

What do we do? Well, we do live in the Dallas area and there is a LOT to do.

We love fine 5 star restaurants, wine bars, sporting events, concerts, we have lunch out almost daily because we work from home and it is a break for us... sometimes at a nice restaurant, sometimes at Market Street, a local grocer with fresh salads, soups and deli.

That said.... you do not have to always spend the money. Our weekly sitter was $60-$80 cash a week (no family within a plane trip away) so we don't always do the expensive restaurant, etc.

We belong to an upscale country club and my husband is a great golfer. I will sometimes just tag along when he plays a round of golf for some exercise ( a round of golf is almost 4 hrs! plenty of time to communicate), go shopping at the mall, go on a long walk, we love the spring festivals... They have the Wildflower festival here each May with great concerts...

That's just a few things we do as a couple. Our daughter is now 16 and she babysits for neighbors. We still go on date nights... we just save the babysitting cash now that we don't have to pay a sitter!!


answers from Chicago on

Falling asleep on the sofa :)



answers from New York on

Good question actually! We don't get a whole lot of time to ourselves b/c we don't have family close by to watch our son and babysitters are wonderful, but can "double" the cost of an evening, so we tend to "multi-task". Before people think "how boring", it really isn't!

Early November, we get a sitter and do our Christmas shopping together before going out to dinner. It's a blast! We have our list of "who and what" and get as much done as we can and then go enjoy a nice dinner and a glass of wine. Ditto for Easter Bunny "stuff". In fact, that's our plan this weekend.

We also do "lunches" when we can instead of dinners (meet mid-day during the week), bite to eat and then a nice long walk by the Hudson River, charity events (mingle with people and have good food), concerts, theater events, etc.



answers from Orlando on

I can relate :-)
How about dropping by a comedy club?



answers from Gainesville on

Well me and my SO love the movies so we generally do that, sometimes we go to dinner and then out to the bookstore or something. Also there is some free entertainment in one of the retirement communities near where we live and they have a bar and happy hour all outside. Sometimes its really lame like big band music but other times they have a really good dj and its great people watching! There are plenty of other yournger people there and kids its tons of fun. we have aso gone for ice cream or coffee. we visit the botanical gardens too.!


answers from Austin on

I am so glad to hear you 2 make time for each other.

We LOVE movies.. I try to get as many free tickets as possible. No matter what the movie is, just to expand our taste. It is like a surprise to find we do like a movie, we may never had seen if we had to pay. Tonight we are going to see a sneak peek at this wonderful movie theater called
The Alamo Drafthouse.. Drink beer or wine and be served excellent food all through great movies.. Next week we are going to a "Quote Along" for Monty Python.. They hand out props and serve special meals. Hysterical.

There is a new "Urban Drive in" right in the middle of town, We pack a meal and some adult beverages.. They are new so they show old weird movies from the 80's, 90's and early 2000's..

Also if there are free events around town, we try to pop by and support them. Museums, music venues, parks..

Sometimes, we like to go to our favorite book store and pick out books and then have a cup of coffee and a pastry while sharing what we found interesting,.

We go to a local pub and play Bananagrams. (I know total geeks)

A neighborhood gathering spot has Trivia so we meet up with friends.

Look in the paper and see what is going on around your town and just try something new. It will keep the 2 of you learning about new things together.



answers from Austin on

We recently went to one of those painting classes, where everyone paints the same thing. I'm not an artist by any means, but it was a lot of fun! Since we both painted the same thing (our city skyline), we hung one at home and my husband took his to the office. You can bring your own wine and snacks. I had a Groupon, so it wasn't even that expensive. I'm sure you have something like this in your area-they seem to have popped up all over.


answers from Portland on

A ceramics or pottery shop? It's so fun to go and paint eachother something. It's pretty innexpensive, creative, and you get to give them what you painted as a gift and a keepsake :)


answers from Jacksonville on

We don't go out as just a couple often... usually it is pretty much dinner and maybe a movie. Or we go out with another couple to dinner. Sometimes we go to concerts. Sometimes after dinner we go browse a bookstore. Sometimes we walk the nearest mall and "window shop".

Or if we go with another couple we might go back to their house and play some cards or something like that.
We are pretty much bibliophiles and videophiles (is there such a thing? ) and hubby is an audiophile, lol. Books, movies and music. That's us. :)



answers from Kansas City on

My husband and I golf together! I'm not much of a player, but Iove to drive the cart, have a few beers, get some sun, and even hit the ball a few times! :) We also do a lot of game nights with friends. We love Things and Catch Phrase the most.



answers from Savannah on

We loved going downtown (Ft Worth) and would eat at a great restaurant and then walk to see some live theater, then go hang out in a jazz club. Or go to the Botanical Gardens and stroll around, holding hands and really just talking and getting back to the simple pleasure of "being" together, kick the ball around, go to the museums (esp. Kimball and The Modern), and hit an Egyptian restaurant out there. Or ballet or a concert at Bass, then walk to the big downtown Barnes & Noble for coffee and dessert and we'd play this game where we'd pick a country we haven't been to before and get travel books and go through it together and make up stories (trying to "best" each other on what craziness we could come up with that would go along with the book). We also loved to go to Dave & Busters or Main Event to play lazer tag, video games, air hockey, and go kart racing. Now: we're still pretty new here and dates without children are few and far between but we like to go to art shows, any kind of fair or festival, go to a cooking or photography class, or go out to eat somewhere with nice outdoor seating. We like to go eat by the water at dusk so we can watch the sky change colors and the water reflect it, with the dolphins fishing nearby, maybe some boats coming in, and then go for a stroll in the woods or down the beach and just listen to the waves and enjoy the silence. We like going places to hear music and have a couple drinks, but we don't like the music being so loud that we can't hear each other---that usually means we're buying something and leaving the property, hanging out on a bench nearby (unless it's a "real" concert). We also like to play lots of games (putt putt golf, bowling, but also silly games like having a theme night). We love live theater though. And we've actually gotten the courage to go to a dance class together and that is awesome! (We weren't dancers, but it was really b/c we didn't feel comfortable in our skills....or lack of....but the class was fun because we got to do it and it be perfectly ok to suck, AND we picked up some basic dance steps so we can do it spontaneously whenever now). Go figure. :) ANY kind of event that we see (even car shows, lol).
Sometimes, if the kids are gone instead, we will do a theme at home. (Food, decor, music, lighting, living room dancing, perhaps a movie that goes with it, etc). Just....what do you like? What does he like? What would y'all like to do but haven't had the guts to try yet? (Bungee jumping? State Fair? Sky diving? LOL). Is there a special date you'd like to recreate? Do you remember what you were doing when you fell in love, or what y'all did for fun pre-kids?


answers from Santa Fe on

We like going for a bike ride together (there's lots of great trails here)
We also like going for a run together.
We love going to the theater (our community theater is really good)
We once went to a fundraiser where you get to see the inside of really unique houses in our area.
Go to hear good music (sigh, this rarely happens)
A museum
A bookstore and coffeeshop (we could both browse forever without children!)



answers from Minneapolis on

We usually do dinner and a movie. Sometimes we just go shopping after the movie. Something to do that just has us out and walking around talking and looking at stuff without kids around. Sometimes we just go back home and watch a movie at our house without the kids.

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