What Are Views on Go Fund Me Page

Updated on May 31, 2018
A.M. asks from Saint Louis, MO
17 answers

My adult daughter’s dog needs very expensive cancer surgery that she can’t afford. I found out the actual expense is what she is asking? There were lot of preliminary tests even leading up to this surgery. There are blood tests, biopsies, vet oncologists, etc. The dog is 7 years so is worth giving her a chance. Sorry for giving everyone the wrong impression.

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So What Happened?

Update on recent post.

Featured Answers

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

i think it's tacky and weird.

i think it's also tacky and weird that you're seeking commiseration on the fact that you've raised a person who is a) irresponsible and b) greedy.

that being said, no one has a gun to their head to donate to a GFM.

GFMs were started with a positive aim, but honestly, most of the ones floated past me have been pretty much like this- people too lazy or entitled to take care of their own problems fishing for financial sugar sponsors.

not interested.
khairete
S.

5 moms found this helpful

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I think it would be in poor taste. I would not do it. She can work out a payment plan with the vet....not ask others to pay for something for her.

4 moms found this helpful

More Answers

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I'm sad that your daughter has a dog with health issues which she can't afford.

Most vet clinics offer a care plan so you can get the need taken care of and pay off as a loan.

Why Go Fund Me? She's basically asking strangers for money and those strangers have no clue if she has a real dog needing care of if she's just scamming.

The thought of her asking for more than needed tells me it's a scam.

Be responsible.., take care of your own responsibilities without attempting to mooch off others.

5 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Why is she asking for more, is she trying to make a profit from her dog's illness?

5 moms found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

It's not something I'd donate money to.
It's unfortunate her pet is sick but even with treatment, how much longer could he live and what would his quality of life be like?
She should consider that it might be kinder to have him euthanized when he can't be made comfortable anymore.
It's hard - but this is part of having pets.
Someday we have to say goodbye.
Asking for money - trying to milk her animals illness/suffering - for profit - does not make me think wonderful things about your daughter.
It makes me think she's lacking class, character, and there's something very wrong with her moral compass.
It's worse than tacky - it's fraud.

4 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

Your daughter is young, single, and childless. She needs to get a second job. The fastest way to earn extra money is to bartend or wait tables. My daughter worked in an IHOP during high school and could earn $200 in a weekend, working in a more upscale place that serves alcohol will get her more tips. She could also work in retail one or two nights a week and on weekends. If she puts all the money she earns on her second job toward paying off her dog's medical bills she will be able to pay if off quickly.

As far as Go Fund Me goes, I never donate.

4 moms found this helpful
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D..

answers from Miami on

Added after you changed your post:
I agree with ChaCha that you maybe you need to fix your relationship with your daughter. You say here in the revision of your post that you are sorry for giving everyone the wrong impression, but accusing her of padding her need for donations WAS the impression that YOU had of your daughter. And you wrote to a bunch of strangers your impression of her after you jumped to conclusions.

In reality, what we have is an impression of you. You think ill of your daughter's choices. I still don't know why you wrote about this....

Original post:
This is your daughter. Why are you asking the question? Are you upset with her? Are you trying to decide what people think of this so that you can tell her? Or are you wanting people to agree with you that it's in poor taste?

Did she SAY that she wants to make money off the scheme? Is it POSSIBLE that she is thinking in terms of possible extra expenses that you don't know anything about? Were you in the room with her and the vet? She may end up having to decide on radiation for the dog. Between the surgery and radiation (which is usual) and the area you live, it can cost upwards of $6000. (Yes, I know this from experience in the family...and the dog is alive 9 months later...)

I know a gal who has Crohn's disease and is in and out of the hospital. She owes a lot of money over and above what the insurance covers. She put out a Go Fund Me request and got less than $50.

It doesn't matter what we think. It matters what people who read her Go Fund Me request think.

3 moms found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I think it's very sad that her dog is sick. When we take on a pet, we have to plan on expensive medical care and hope it will not be needed. It's a shame she got a dog she cannot afford.

Asking friends to take on her responsibility is bad enough, but if she's hoping they will get other people (strangers) to fund this takes it to a new level.

Asking for more than what it costs tells me she is a user and a taker, in it for herself. I'd be thinking she's just going to collect the money and not get the surgery for the dog. I'd also be concerned that maybe the dog isn't really sick, and she's making it up to bilk people out of money. I'm sure you're royally embarrassed that your child has turned out this way.

3 moms found this helpful
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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I personally would not do a go fund me unless someones life was at stake, when my cat needed expensive surgery we couldn't afford we had him put down once his quality of life got poor. In the future she might check into pet insurance, there are also loans she can get to help pay for vet care.

3 moms found this helpful

T.D.

answers from New York on

i can't afford to help someone else when i am barely paying my own bills. so i don't even bother wiht those types of pages

2 moms found this helpful
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K.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

I have supported many Go Fund Me campaings in the last few years. I think they are a good way for people to get support from others when they need it most. However, I would not support a campaign for a pet. I know that most people who have pets feel they are part of the family and how hard it is to lose those pets, but it isn't how I would choose to spend my money. Pets are something people choose to have; if they can't afford them, they shouldn't have them.

If your daughter is seriously planning to ask for more money than the surgery is going to cost, I think that's really tacky and presumptuous of her. Why would she do that? What is she going to do with the extra money? I think it is pretty rude to ask friends, family, and potentially strangers for help, and then intentionally ask for more than you actually need. If she was a friend of mine, I'd have a really hard time ever trusting her motives or her judgement knowing how she would take advantage of others like that.

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C.C.

answers from New York on

What is your question? Apparently you have changed your question since first posting?

You have written many questions in the past related to thinking that your daughter is irresponsible with money, but then most recently you wanted to celebrate her adoption.... Maybe you need to work on fixing your relationship with your daughter....

2 moms found this helpful
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M.6.

answers from New York on

People can Go Fund Me for anything - honesty and ethics need not apply. I've seen one for a guy who said he was too lazy to work and wanted people to support him. So? I just used my power of the scroll and just skipped right on by.

I think it is crappy that she would ask for more, but again, I'm not going to donate to her anyways, so as far as I am concerned she can ask for a million dollars. Again - none of my nevermind.

I think you are actually asking why your daughter is being a mooch - perhaps in your heart her dishonesty bothers you. You should be asking her about that, not strangers on the internet who have no idea.

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E.B.

answers from Honolulu on

It's her right to ask for financial help for her pet. It's also the public's right to make the decision about whether to donate or not.

But if she's asking for more, she's potentially diverting funds that could go to injured children, or for funeral expenses for a murdered loved one, or to a mother who's fighting to survive an illness.

I think that some strangers who just love pets might donate, but it sounds like your daughter's ethics aren't the finest, and probably people who know her might realize that and withhold donating.

Google Go Fund Me Rules and you will read that the "organizer", which would be your daughter, states that by creating a campaign, the money will be used as stated for the intended purpose (the dog's surgery). If someone were to discover that, say the surgery cost $10,000, and your daughter raised $12,000 and used the $2,000 to pay off her car or go to Vegas, well, that person could file a complaint or seek other methods of complaints. Many times people raise more money than expected, and they use the extra funds to help similar people (in other words, your daughter could donate any extra money after the surgery to the veterinary hospital to pay for another dog's care, or donate to the ASPCA or humane society - people probably wouldn't have a problem with that).

But to try to raise more money than the surgery costs is unethical, and could be a real problem according to GFM rules. She's an adult, and responsible for her own behavior. Sorry that she's greedy.

2 moms found this helpful

W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

ETA: Why can't you help her? Why hasn't her vet given her a payment plan? Or even a life expectancy plan? Is her dog too old to survive surgery? What are the chances for a good, active life AFTER surgery? We decided to put our dog down in 2008 after a cyst on his tail turned cancerous. He was 15.5 years old. He was done. Maybe her dog is done too?
________________________

A.

She needs to be honest about what she needs the money for and how much she needs.

I have donated to go-fund-me's - AFTER I have done some research to find out IF the story is true and not some random sleezebag taking advantage of people for money.

She needs to know HOW MUCH Go-Fund-Me will take from her as their share of her "gain". She needs to know the tax implications, if any, for this income as well.

If she gets the vets' help, pictures and is HONEST? She might be able to get what she needs. However, if she lies about it? Then it's on her when she spoils it for someone who REALLY needs it.

I truly support animals. Most vets work with their patients to help them and their beloved
pet.

The fact that you're not stopping her from being unethical? Well....sorry.

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

I have only donated to things usually where they are raising money for a well known charity and the people themselves are somehow doing something to support it (recently a little girl cut off all her hair for cancer and asked us to donate whatever we wanted to support it), and that sort of thing .Go Fun Me pages don't really interest me unless I know the family well and it's a dire emergency. Even then, very few people I've known actually have ever done them.

For a pet, I've never heard of it. Most people would put the animal down if they couldn't afford the care. It usually goes downhill after a certain point (did in our case) but we covered the costs until then and didn't ask for help. I think I would ask family members for a loan before asking total strangers. I guess I can't relate.

I think Go Fund Me pages probably have applicable uses in certain situations and I'm not knocking them. I just don't have a lot of experience with them.

To ask for more money than she needs - I don't really understand your question. That than means she is trying to make money off this - which I get happens sometimes with these Go Fund Me pages - I've heard sometimes people donate more than is asked for. This is another reason I don't really understand these pages.

I don't know. You're asking us to pass judgement on your daughter. Obviously, it's not the greatest idea and kind of weird. Who asks for extra money from strangers? I don't get why she would. Is she low on cash? Kind of odd.

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M.S.

answers from Washington DC on

I think that this speaks volumes about your daughter. Wow. No integrity.

2 moms found this helpful