Weaning from the Pacifier - Woodland,CA

Updated on October 01, 2009
T.D. asks from Woodland, CA
11 answers

I'm sure I'm not the first to ask about this, but I haven't been able to locate prior requests so I need to ask again.
How do you wean an infant from the pacifier? My son is 4 months old and becoming more and more dependant on it. He started sleeping through the night about 11 weeks, but in the past two, started waking more and more during the night. I'm sure he's not hungry as he goes right back to sleep again as soon as I put the pacifier in his mouth. Last night he woke up three times, and I’m no longer getting the much coveted rest to which I was accustomed.
Your suggestions and shared experiences are greatly appreciated.

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So What Happened?

So I think I have it figured out...I hope I'm not counting my eggs too soon but I've got two nights down and a good start for night #3.
I'm getting him to play really hard after he's good an full and the past two nights have been great! I think he just needed to expel some more energy.
I haven't taken his pacifier away completely, or really at all. I'm just not depending on it so much myself. I don't think I realized how much I was offering it to him.

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J.A.

answers from Sacramento on

Hello..he seems a bit young to be trying to take the paci away. He still needs the sucking. It will get easier once he learns to put the paci back in himself. I don't think the waking up is that unusal for a 4 month old...at least I know all my kids were still waking at that age. If you try and take it away altogether at this point you may get less sleep then you are now. I'd wait at least a few more months, if not until he is a year.

I know it is hard, my daughter is attached to her paci, but my older two never had any interest in one. We are at the point where it is just for sleep, but I really wish we could get rid of it altogether, it just isn't the right time for us yet. I need the sleep and am not ready for a tough transition as I know it will be.

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T.T.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi T.,

I love your pretty name. My take on this is this: he needs the sucking and nuzzling actions still. Let him have the pacifier. It pacifies and strengthens muscles. He's only 4 mos. and will grow out of it naturally. Whether he is still nursing or not, he needs you and this is the replication. Besides, that is what they are for. Don't worry about what other advice moms say or if hubby wants him done with it or if family says this will happen or that will happen. It is a rubber thing. He won't develop crooked teeth or any of that stuff. You are a great mom. And if he needs to nurse or have a bottle, go for that too. More milk=great teeth and bones!

T.

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G.K.

answers from San Francisco on

Pacifiers are NOT the devil; as other mamas have said, they have their benefits. What I really wanted to respond to was your statement that you know he's not hungry. At 4 months old, babies should still have at least one nighttime feeding, be it breast or bottle. I would also say you were VERY fortunate to have a baby sleeping through the night so young. You didn't mention how many hours he typically slept before, but 5-6 hours at one stretch is considered sleeping through the night for any baby. His current behavior is more normal and in tune with the typical sleep patterns of a baby. My son was still waking 3-4 times each night until about 18 months old, and even at almost 3, he still has nights where he wakes once or twice.

Have faith, he'll learn to find his pacifier on his own (and put it in his mouth) around 5-6 months old, and you should start getting better sleep. Also keep in mind that babies will hit developmental milestones, which they might try in their sleep. Rolling over (which he'll start trying pretty soon), sitting on his own, crawling, etc. All of these milestones could affect his sleep. Just be prepared for MANY sleep pattern changes in the coming years! I HIGHLY recommend Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution, but just read it for now; he's not ready for "sleep training" or anything like that! :)

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C.L.

answers from San Francisco on

It is too early to wean him from it. His waking during the night could be due to growing and development things. There is a lot going on in that little body that we can't see and sucking is how infants find comfort.

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C.T.

answers from Atlanta on

I asked the same question about my 12 month old. Now 14 months and still w/ paci. We have decided to wait to 18 mon. Personally, I think it is too soon. Studies suggest sucking helps with sids and the percentage of risk greatly decreases after 7 mons so we decided to wait at least that long. At 8 mon. my husband did not want me to take it from her so we agreed to do only nap/bed time. She also woke up at night for her paci (she grew out of this behavior once she was able to find and put it back in her mouth on her own.) She was attached. I was against paci from the beginning until speaking to our ped. There are benefits. Basically they have a need to suck. So it's thumb or paci. Which is the lesser of two evils. When I wanted to take it away at 12 mon. she refused to sleep. My husband again didn't agree. After reading the responses... I am going to try again, maybe not cold turkey, at 18 mon. At this point it is an "attachment" issue and not a health issue, as with sids and/or whether or not it affects teeth and her need to suck has turned in to a need to chew. My husband disagrees, he thinks she needs/loves/and is comforted by the paci. I refuse to have a baby that learns to talk with a paci in their mouth or cannot learn to self comfort without an artificial piece of plastic. We have few, they stay in her bed, if they are lost that is it. Anyway, at this point there are more benefits than risks, you may have to give up some sleep... at least long enough to put the paci back in. Oh, and I wouldn't be jumping up right away either. Give him a few minutes to cry, see if he falls back asleep. Also giving him some time will let him know that you do not come running (at least not at every whim) and maybe he will find something else to self soothe "moms not coming, im okay with that..." maybe he will reach for his own paci. I used to turn the sound down on the monitior and watch for a few minutes before I would go in. I know its hard in the middle of the night to teach patience. Honestly, I turned the volume on 1 w/ monitor on, our daughter would have to really be upset before I would hear her at all. I knew at this point I would have to go in. Many other times she would cry/whimper for a short time, I would wake up watch her and she would just grab her blanket, maybe her paci, and roll over and back to sleep. It may be unconventional but I didn't go in every time and I didn't hear her every time. By 14 mon you will learn the different screams and what they mean and when you do or don't need to go in. Obviously, if she wakes me up from a dead sleep screaming at the top of her lungs its probably not the paci that she needs. This will not be the olny thing that you will be losing sleep over.

http://www.mamapedia.com/questions/1179706815802310657 My old post. Hope it helps and I will update when we try to get rid of paci again.

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P.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I can't remember at what age they can find the paci for themselves, but I used to clip it to their clothing with a binky clip. If your baby is dependent on binkies it will be healthier to let him have it, and easier on you too, once he can find it himself.

Pacifiers are good.

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S.Z.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi there,
Its great to be concerned, but all too much early. Heas only 4 months old. If hes still desiring the pacifer than he should still have it. It helps reduce the risk of sids & strengthens the mucles. I also wanted to point out that he may be teething. Especially at night when hes sleeping. My oldest daughter is 28 months old & we had her on the pacifier from the time I went back to work, 12 weeks untill 2years. She would only take the pacifier at night or naps untill after 1, than we only allowed at night. We wanted to ween her from it, however one night we were forced to go cold turkey. As her pacifers would get worn out we stopped replacing them. One night we couldnt find the last one. So she cried for an hour and forty five minutes at the top of her lungs. I dindnt realize that she craved it so much. But that was the worst of it. The next day she found it under the couch cushion (like she had stashed it there). I told her there were "yuckies" on it from the lint, & for a few days after she would ask for the paci, & then she would just say, "yuckies?" & I'd respond "yes, yuckies".
So my point is, that at 4 months its still too soon. I wouldnt reccomend pacifier buckels or straps though, that may pose a choking hazard. My daughter never learned how to find on her own, but I would wake to give to her,
So good luck, hope my answer was a little helpful.
S.
PS babies sleep patterns will change several times in the first 2 years of life.

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J.K.

answers from Sacramento on

Now that I have had my 2nd child and I am around a lot more people with babys ... I think a warning lable should be given out. Baby will wake or wake more offten at 4 months! I can't tell you if it is hunger, growth spert, emotional or devemental but almost every mom I know has had this waking issue at 4 months. For me both my daughter and son nursed more offten (every 2 hours at night).
Good luck and know lots of mamas have been there!
Oh, and it will get better :)

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S.M.

answers from San Francisco on

He's awful young to be separated from his pacifier. If it helps him, he should keep it. Time enough to take it away when he's 18 or 20 months. I would put a couple pacifiers in his crib, so he has a better chance of finding and grabbing one if the first one slips out of his mouth.

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D.M.

answers from San Francisco on

We are having the same problem with our 3 month old. He starts waking up at 1:00 am and does this every hour until morning. We are working with a sleep specialist to see how we can take the pacifier away without major drama or long nights of crying.... I will post our results.
One thing we try and remember is that this is just a phase! :)

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T.G.

answers from San Francisco on

We waited until 2 years old to wean from the binky, so this advice won't really work on a young baby, but anyways...we gathered up all his binky's and told him that we were going to give them to the binky fairy and she would give them to the little babies. He is a big boy and doesn't need them anymore, but the little babies do. And she is going to come and get them at night and leave a present. We made a big fanfare about it, wrote her a letter, etc. and the next day, he had a really nice present. When he asked about his binky we reminded him that we gave them to the binky fairy. He only asked about them twice. We were amazed because he was seriously addicted to his binky before that.

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