Wanting to Start Weaning from Breastfeeding

Updated on March 31, 2008
M.B. asks from Meridian, ID
37 answers

Hello! I've been breastfeeding my almost 8 month old since he was born.. He seldom took a bottle of breastmilk and he Hates formula when i try and give it to him. We just got him sleeping in the crib through the night and now I'm looking forward to the glorious days of having my chest to myself. I have no idea how to start doing this! I need advice and suggestions :) He is definately a momma's boy so i'm expecting it to be hard for him. Thanks for your help!

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So What Happened?

** NEW Update
The responses keep coming in! :) ITs a good thing too. There was a good point made that since he just got the sleeping in his crib and through the night was a lot to get used to .. so i'll be waiting a couple more weeks maybe 3 to start weaning. I think by the time i get him fully weaned i'll be close enough to that 1 year mark. And i'll be saving plenty of breastmilk. Thank you all for you caring responses! It helps tremendously!

Thank you to all you who responded! It was a lot of help! I do know the benefits of breastfeeding past the 1 year or at least up to it. But I also think I have done well for the hard time it was for me in the beginning and I am ready to end. My personal thoughts on this.. Everyone feels differently about this subject and choose to breastfeed up to one year or not, you're still a good mother :)
I plan to start weaning my baby next week thanks to the ideas for weaning! Thank you ladies :)

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M.P.

answers from Pueblo on

All breastfed babies are attatched to their mothers! Enjoy it now, because you will miss it later. I had to wean my daughter when she was only 9 months old because I was diagnosed with Lupus and had to start taking medication. When I weaned her I pumped milk first, started giving her bottles with breast milk a couple of times a day, then gradually began introducing formula. I ended with only breastfeeding her at nap time and night. Then, if it was too hard for me to bottle feed her at bedtime and naptime, I would let my husband do it. I was able to wean her in 2 weeks.

I hope this helps!

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C.E.

answers from Denver on

What I did was introduce my daughter to a sippy cup. Target has a selection based on age. It wasn't too hard b/c she is soo independant. I mixed breast milk with a little formula and eventually to all formula. I also started out at just one meal a day and slowly weaned that way. I didn't want to do it suddenly and freak her out. She Loved the sippy cup and eventually only had me at night. I hope that helps! C.

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M.M.

answers from Denver on

Thanks for asking this question. I was just getting ready to do this too. My daughter is 9 months old and we are going out of town over night soon so I thought it might be nice to be weaning her before then so she does't freak out. I look forward to reading all the responses. I am going to go to the breastfeeding clinic in Greeley today to get some advice too. Good luck to you!

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A.H.

answers from Denver on

M.,

One aspect of this situation you might want to consider is the position of your son. He's just been through a huge transition of starting to sleep by himself all night. Starting to wean now may be somewhat traumatic for him since he's still adjusting to not being with you during the night. He is loving his time nursing with you during the day since he doesn't get that at night anymore, and there's a good chance you could see his nightwaking resume if you choose to wean now. The perspective of our little ones is often overlooked when we are ready to move on to something different, so just remember where he's coming from.
Congrats on sleeping through the night!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.K.

answers from Denver on

M.,
Don't rush to stop breastfeeding.
Believe me, you'll later wish you'd waited.
It takes time to get the hang of it all and
maybe the best bonding time is going to happen
in the upcoming months. Talk with mothers who
you know that breastfeed for over a year to get
advice. I rushed with my second son to stop at
9 months because we were taking a road trip.
It was so much more work to fix formula.
Relax and enjoy this precious time.

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M.P.

answers from Grand Junction on

Hi M.,

I started weaning my kids at around 9-11 months. They hated formula and never took bottles. I would just pump and offer them milk in a sippy cup. At first it's no more than just a cool thing to chew on - but once they get the sucking down on the spout....that's it - they love it because its faster for them than nursing. It literally only took all three of my kids a couple weeks to catch on to the whole cup thing. It was me who kept nursing for a little longer. I would supplement a feeding or a "snack" with the cup. It was harder for ME to wean them than it was for them!! Good luck!!

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V.S.

answers from Missoula on

First off, if you are going to wean, make sure you have some breast milk in the freezer. You can take it out if he gets sick; it's better than Pedialyte.

Second, what has worked for me and a lot of others is to choose one feeding a day and substitute solids and either water or milk (formula or breast milk) from a cup. When he is used to not having the breast with that feeding and your body is used to not nursing at that time, choose another feeding and do the same thing. Eventually, all feeds will be breast free. BTW, it is easier to go to a cup than a bottle for many babies that are breast fed.

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S.S.

answers from Provo on

M.,
Why stop such a good thing? It is wonderful your baby is nursing so well, AND sleeping through the night! It is such a GIFT to have a good nursing baby. Breast milk is the absolute BEST thing you can give your baby. If I were you... I would continue to nurse until he is ready to stop. He will let you know. This is a unselfish gift you are giving him. The longer you can nurse your baby, the better off he will be. He will let you know when the time is right...but let him decide, and it will just be a natural thing. Be open to letting him nurse longer...This may mean up to a year, or longer if needed!! But, please just enjoy it(I am sure you do already!)- those little quiet, peaceful moments with your baby will only last so much longer, and then you will have forever to remember! it is such a wonderful thing. You will know when things don't go just right in nursing (and there are major struggles with a baby's health or just latching on) that a normal nursing baby is such a blessing! (I am a mother of 4, and all my babies have nursed, but all were very different. My baby that nursed the longest was my very hardest to get to nurse (she had underdeveloped lungs and had to be in the N.I.C.U for a while then home on oxygen for 10 days, so it was a struggle, but I know other Moms go through much much harder situations!). but she seems to be the one who is most content, sleeps better, and just is happier in general. And healthier!
Good luck and just enjoy enjoy enjoy that sweet little nurser!!!! What a blessing!

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S.M.

answers from Casper on

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M.P.

answers from Provo on

I've just learned that a baby should be soley on mama's milk until his eye teeth come in which is around 15 to 18 months. Their bodies are not ready to digest anything else on their own until then. Maybe check this info out before you decide to wean. If you decide to still wean, have 1 less feeding a day or a week however you decide and subsitute it for let's say goat's milk. I've leaned that goat's milk is the next best thing to mama's milk but nothing is as perfect as mama's milk.

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S.S.

answers from Pueblo on

I understand what you are going through wanting your chest to yourself. I nursed all 3 of my children. I know that it is best to nurse your baby until they are at least 12 months. I didn’t start weaning my first until she was 12 months and she was fully weend when she was 13 months. My first and 2nd are 18 months apart so I only had 5 months of having my chest to myself before the 2nd was born. My 2nd child was born a day after my b day so for a birthday present to me, when he turned 1, I stopped nursing him. I was surprised of how well he took to that since he is such a mommas boy. I also nursed my 3rd child until he was 1 year old. Even though your child is eating food, the ladies at the lactation department at the hospital, told me that is best not to start weaning until your child is over a year old. I know that you are eager to wean, but try to hang in there until he is 1 year.
Good luck.

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R.N.

answers from Denver on

My experience: With my first daughter I had alot of pressure to stop breastfeeding - at four months I started the process which took months because I would get in so much pain from the volume of milk in my breast not being used.

My second daughter - older and wiser - I breast fed her until she lost interest - about 14 months old. It was soooo much easier - we did it together without pain. My body naturally adjusted with her cycle of growth and interests in using a cup and eating real food. She did however use a pacifer until she was nearly three. I have a neat story to share about her stopping to use that if your are interested.

I know you want to have your breast to yourself, but you so close to that "year" marker when kids naturally want real food and are excited about a cup. Which makes it easy to quit.

Good luck!
Nancy

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B.W.

answers from Denver on

Hello M., I have to say that it is hard to ween your baby, I breastfed my daughter who is now 6, let's see, I nursed her until she was 18 months!!! You have to tell yourself that you have to do it, I had to build myself up to it then finally one day I said this is the last day!! I picked the cold turkey method. I waited until a Friday cause I knew we were going to be up (she still would want to nurse during the night) by Sunday she didnt want it and went on about her business. I told myself I should have done that a loooonngg time ago!! My first rule is to "STAY CONSISTENT" in whatever method you use, babies are very smart. I think it's harder for us than it is for the baby. Now I have get my mind ready to cold turky my son who is 22 months old!! Good luck, remember consistency is the key!!

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M.S.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Just curious as to why you think it's time to wean... everything you cited other than you wanting your chest back would lean towards not weaning. You are giving him the most amazing nutrition/immunization/brain builder. In addition, if you'd like the professional perspective on this (I am a therapist), if you are comfortable with it and it provides the bonding time between you two, you are developing a life-long, healthy attachment between you and your son. Not to mention, ingraining in him a deep respect for women. On a practical note, when my son became ill with stomach flu, the only thing he could keep down for any length of time was breastmilk. Nursing provided him with tremendous comfort and diminished the stress of being sick so that he recovered more quickly than peers who had been ill with the same and were not breastfed. I'm sure I'm coming across as a militant breastfeeder but really, I think you have to decide what's right for you and just be intentional with it. I know how tiring it is to feel like your chest is no longer your own and the girls don't pass the "pencil test" anymore but after 3 1/2 years (I'm on my second now), it has been the most wonderful thing between my sons and myself. In any case, going 8 months, you're still ahead of the national average of 5-6 months!

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L.H.

answers from Denver on

M.,
I have heard many horror stories about weaning from the breast. I myself had no problem. I commend you for doing it..it is the very best start you can give your child. I think I may have cheated a bit. I started feeeding a little less often and supplementing with a bottle. As my milk decreased I let her nurse until it was gone. Eventually she wasn't getting enough and had to take the bottle. I on the other hand never went through the agony of pain with gorging. Sometimes she could only nurse for a minute. Just enought to empty my breasts. Good luck!

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K.J.

answers from Pocatello on

Try taking garlic pills it will make your brest milk taste nasty to baby and wont want it. Try putting a little banana flavored cearial in with the formula for flavor and baby will probably take 2 it better. Baby will sleep well 2 being more content with fullness.

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D.K.

answers from Denver on

Mix 3/4 of your breast milk with formula then gradually reduce the amount of breast milk. I did this with my son too and after about a week or so he was on formula 100%.
Then do the same when it is after his first bday to add half formula in with the whole milk he will transition too. They go by smell a lot at this age and he likes the smell of your breast milk and it is just what he is used to. When he is off breast milk completely be careful when feeding as he will be able to smell you still have milk in your breasts and sometimes it is best if daddy gives him his bottle then. Good luck.

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K.H.

answers from Boise on

With my son, I started feeding him more and more of his jarred baby foods. When he would regularly get a breastfeeding, I would substitute baby food instead. (Not every meal, just once per day to start with... then gradually increase the number of times you do this. Start with day feedings first, then night feedings) Feed him as much non-breast food as you possibly can to get his tummy full during that meal. After he is full, if he is still wanting your breast, it's just a comfort thing. I would get my sons tummy full with jarred foods, and if he needed that closeness, I would get a bottle of my own pumped milk and feed him only about 4oz of that. But hold him tightly to you, so he feels very close... almost like you are breastfeeding him. After a couple weeks of my doing this, my son just up and quit breastfeeding. I did have to keep pumping however just to sooth myself for a few days afterwards. (and of course to have a small stash in my fridge/freezer for just in cases) I hope this helps, I don't know if it will... just an another idea for you. Good Luck

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S.L.

answers from Boise on

This would take a lot of pumping, but maybe you could try mixing two ounces of formula with 6 ounces of breastmilk, then gradually increase the amount of formula until he's drinking it straight.
Obviously, it's your decision, but I actually felt bad when my son weaned himself at 10 months. It did feel nice to have my chest back :) but then I realized that only 10 months out of my whole life did I have the super-power to make milk for my baby. It wasn't quite as hard because I knew I'd have more babies and get another chance, but I realized how rushing things with my babies is just dumb! They're only little once, and now I don't want my babies to grow up so darn fast!
That said, my second baby weaned himself about the same time. But I have no control over that, so I can't cry too much!

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C.F.

answers from Denver on

Update: Hi M., i agree with the mamas who said go to a sippy for him. he will do fine with a sippy for nutrition, but i would still pay attention to his sucking and bonding needs and give him a pacifier if he wants it and some cuddle time. hope it's going well for you! dr sears the baby book has some suggestions for going from breast to formula.

M., i am a big fan of extended nursing, it comes in SO handy. but i am also a fan of listening to your gut about when you are ready to stop.

do it very gradually, plan to spend months doing it. he still needs the nutrition of nursing so you will need to replace feedings with formula and bottles. some people start with introducing bottles of pumped milk. then gradually changing the ratio of mostly breastmilk and a little formula and then more and more formula. a lot of babies have issues with formula so doing it that way will help you see if he has any reaction.

i think the other big thing is that babies nurse and suck for comfort. 6 months to 2years is that time of getting teeth and my kids nursed a lot for comfort at those ages. so, just be aware that you need to replace that for him. if he doesn't get your breast, he gets something else, a cuddle and a pacifier or a teething something or a warm bottle of rice milk or whatever. know that he is looking for the whole package that was nursing for him, not just food, and your weaning will be more successful for you both, in my opinion. good luck!!

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J.M.

answers from Denver on

Hi M.,
I know that in the U.S. most women wean by the time a child is 1years old--but that is not actually recommend by the American Pediatric Association. Formula companies have done a great job of advertizing formula as equal to breastfeeding, but it is a multi-billion dollar industry and formula is, in actuality THE big link to childhood allergies, asthma, digestive issues and obesity in babies and children. Also, research proves that breastfed children have higher IQ's and much better speech as they become children (breastfeeding does a ton for a toddler's development) Not to mention, that the longer you breastfeed, the MUCH lower the chances of your getting breast cancer. There are many more benefits to breastfeed longer to not; you've done a great job so far. Keep it up! :)

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E.R.

answers from Denver on

So...here's my advice for what it's worth. I've done this with both my kids. My son is now 13 months old and I'm down to one side for about three minutes per night. We'll be done tomorrow. Up until his first birthday, I was still feeding him every 3-4 hours. The last month, I fed when he woke, around 10, around 3 and then when he went to bed. Keep nursing regularly because he needs the nutrition from you. Anyway, after his first birthday, I took one feeding away every week or two and now we are down to the one side at night, as I mentioned. My son is a mama's boy too and it has worked with not much trouble. I think he misses it a little in the morning cuz he's cranky, but then he gets milk in a sippy cup and his cereal and cheers right up. So, keep going strong, in my opinion, for the next few months and then start taking away slowly. Good luck. I'm proud of you. It's a wonderful thing to be able to breast feed your baby.

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C.M.

answers from Provo on

I have 7 children and have breastfed all of them. When they are around 9 months old is when I start really looking forward to not having them attached to me all the time. You really should wait until he turns 1 to stop breastfeeding if he doesn't want the bottle. You are almost there!! What I have done is when they turn 11 months I start taking one feeding away at a time. You can usually get them preoccupied with something else, like a snack at the time you would nurse. If it is summer I would take them to the park or somewhere outside and they would forget about nursing at that particular time. Nighttime feeding is the hardest because if they wake up in the middle of the night they are tired and cranky. I would save that one for around the 1st birthday when he can start having cows milk. I would try to offer them a drink from a sippy cup or regular cup and try to soothe them back to sleep. With a few of them is was very easy and they were ready to be done but with a few we had a few crying times but within a few days we were completely done.

If you want to be done now then you will have to find a bottle and work with him until he takes it and then quit nursing. We had to quit with one of ours at 9 months and he hated bottles. He would scream when we offered it to him. We finally found the Avent bottles and he would take them after a few tries. When he turned one we took the bottles away and he drank from cups. If they need to take a sippy cup to bed for security make sure it is only water to protect his teeth.

When my best friend's little girl only had night time feedings left she went on a weekend getaway to Las Vegas with some girlfriends and let daddy be the one to end the night feedings. Her little girl was 1 and she told her that her milk went bye bye and it worked.

I hope this helped and I didn't just ramble on.

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K.H.

answers from Billings on

Try mixing formula with breastmilk initially to get your son to take it. You can slowly increase the amount of formula in each bottle to get him adjusted to it. Only decrease with one feeding at a time. Take it slow. If you stop nursing to quickly you will blow those breasts up to double size and be very sore. Remove one feeding at a time and replace it with a bottle. It should take you several weeks to fully stop breast feeding. Sudafed taken every four hours can help you breast milk dry up also.

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K.R.

answers from Great Falls on

You are so lucky to have the ability to stay at home with your children. I agree with Julia about the benefits of breastfeeding. I have 2 children, 4 years and 19 months. My son (19 months) finally stopped breast feeding at 17 months; just after Christmas. It was nice to have my chest back, but as a working mom, it was also great to have that bonding time with him. I weaned my daughter at 14 months. Both are very healthy and I attribute this to sticking with the breast feeding for as long as possible. I have many friends who are nutritionists, and all of them are supporters of breast feeding for at least a year. Julia mentioned the American Pediatric Association, which actually recommends breast feeding for 2 years. I personally think this is a little too long! When a child can start asking for it by name, it's a little much! :o) However, if you can stick with it for a couple more months, it will be a huge benefit to your son. I weaned both of my children by sending them to grandma's house for about a week. It just so happened that I did not have daycare the week of Christmas, and my mom volunteered to take the kids (She lives about 2 hours away), so it worked perfect to wean my son. It was easier to tell him no, and distract him with other food, when he asked for it. Also, it's a good idea to try several different "nipples", or bottles, to see if he'll take one or another. My son and daughter were very different in this area. Since I am a working mom, I had to pump, so both of my children had to take a bottle. To each their own. I guess there is a reason there are so many to choose from! Good luck!

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K.D.

answers from Salt Lake City on

Julie gave you the exact same advice I would give you. She mentioned the first morning and bedtime feedings will be hardest, so once you get to those two only, pick the one he's least attached to, and then skip it one day. Then nurse him the next day and then skip two days, etc. Usually once you can skip about 3 or 4 days, you can just quit that feeding all together. And then do the same with the very last feeding.

Replace the nursing with extra love and attention (as well as formula or milk from bottle or cup). I also suggest trying to avoid your usual nursing spots if possible and feed him by bottle or cup somewhere else. My daughter cried every time she saw the nursing pillow or we sat in our usual nursing spots for weeks after I'd fully weaned her, so I had to hide the pillow and avoided being with her in certain spots. It was definitely harder on her than on me. But you'll get through it. Best wishes.

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J.C.

answers from Casper on

Take it slow, if you have that option. Take away the lunch and day feedings first and take one away about every 3-4 days. This will allow your body a chance to adjust and slow down the milk production. (It also allow your little one a chance to adjust too the the new routine that you will be forming). You will want to continue holding him at his feedings because he will need that continuation of what he knows and loves. Once you have all the day time feedings then you can start working on the night and first thing in the moring. Usually the last feedings to go are the one that is right before they go to bed and the one that is right when they wake up. Your little guy is old enough for a cup but I would stick with the bottle for a little while to ease the transition from breast to formula. Just change one thing at a time so that he doesn't have a melt down from too many changes. But most of all, once you start, just keeping going forward because it will be harder on him and you if you waffle and don't stick to your goals. Choosing to wean is better than what happened when my youngest son was that old---he bit me and drew blood, so we stopped cold turkey. Good luck and congrats for making it this far with him.

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E.B.

answers from Pueblo on

I, too, am dealing with this with my 8 month old! But we have an added issue: he sleeps with us in the bed still. I am not wanting to ween him entirely, just at night. With my daughter it was so easy...she literally slept through the night at 3 months and never night-nursed, so I haven't done this, either, really. I will be checking for your responses. Good luck M.!

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T.T.

answers from Boise on

wow, what a lot of different responses!
I just want to say as a former breastfeeding consultant, you are a wonderful mother for breastfeeding. I recommend consulting your local Dr. or health department and getting some free advice from a breastfeeding consultant that can give you advice based on you and your babies needs. One thing to remeber that wheather you have breasfeed for 2 month or 1 year the benefit is still there. And when you start introducing formula or breastmilk at around 8 months use a cup, not a bottle, and never put cereal on a bottle. I would go into this more with you but think you should really call on the advice of a breatfeeding consultant.
Great job,
T.

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C.E.

answers from Provo on

i was worried that when i finally got down to only nursing once before bed and once in the morning with my second baby (the clingier one) that it would be a big problem letting go of those two times. so one night we went with extended family to a basketball game, which of course went later than my kids' bedtime. my son was having so much fun with all the excitement of the game, the train ride from the city, grandparents and cousins to play with that he never noticed skipping the nursing. i brought a sippy cup of milk for him (he was over a year, but you could use another substitute) just in case, but he was too excited to finish it. of course he fell asleep in the car. i made sure my husband carried him to bed so he wouldn't smell me and think of nursing. and in the morning he slept so late that i was able to distract him with breakfast right away. i was so surprised at how well this worked. the next day when he indicated that he wanted to nurse, i just cheerfully told him he didn't really need it. i offered him a different snack to eat while i read him a story. now, i also feel that it's best to nurse through the first year, but i know how it is to want your body and freedom back. so if it's getting too frustrating for you, i feel that it's better to wean the baby while you still feel a little positive about it rather than continue and resent being "used". both my kids took a little less than 2 months to wean by slowly skipping regular nursing times and/or stretching the time between nursing times a little longer each day.

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J.S.

answers from Provo on

I agree with the last post, why stop? You mention that he hates formula...what are you going to ween him to. You need to wait until he is 12 months before you switch him to cow or (as some on mamasource suggest) goats milk. Their little bodies can't handle those things until they are one. So save your self the cost of formula and wait to switch him in 4 more months, then your not switching him again to regular milk! That is too much change in too short a time in my opinion...but that is my opinion. I have 4 kids. The first cold turkey's me at 4 months, 2nd & 3rd gradually took care of it themselves, and #4's 1st B-day is today. He is my different one as he refused to nurse, then never sucked hard enough to get anything, but due to medical issues he needed to breastmilk, so I have pumped and fed him this full year, he has now been approved to ween to cows milk. So good luck on what you decide

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M.C.

answers from Pueblo on

Congratulations on being able to nurse that long that is great. When my now 4 year old was nursing and starting to wean I would mix a little bit of formula in with the breat milk and just gradually kept adding more formula untli she would rather have formula instead of breats milk. She wouldn't drink just formula at first, but it only took a week or two for her to like the formula. Good Luck

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N.W.

answers from Salt Lake City on

I stopped at 8 months and my son developed many food allergies which later turned into eczema. It has been horrible. I wish I'd breastfed him until he was one.

That said, if you want to stop. Switch out one feeding for a bottle. Eventually you'll replace all the feedings with bottles/cereal. Do it slowly. The night feeding is the hardest to get rid of. Do it last. When it's time, make sure he eats before bed. Then tuck him in by holding him and reading him a story. Have the same bedtime ritual every night. Give him a binky at night if he'll take it.

If he is old enough to try to lift up your shirt to try to find his snack, wear a one-piece bathing suit under your clothes.

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W.H.

answers from Denver on

My daughter is 10 months and I'm going to start weening her next month so that by one year she will be on whole milk. I am going to start eliminating her middle of the day feedings (replace them with small amounts of whole milk or a snack) and then move towards eliminating morning, then evening nursings. I will give her about a week or so with each eliminated feeding to make the adjustment and to see how whole milk feels in her tummy.

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A.P.

answers from Denver on

If your baby is hungry enough, he'll take a bottle. Use a bottle that is similar to the breast. I like Advent bottles. The nipples have different flows. "1" is slow flow for 0-3 month olds. "2" is for 3-6 months olds. "3" is for 6-9 month olds. "4" is for 9-12 month olds. Mix your breastmilk with formula. 1/4 formula + 3/4 breastmilk for 3-5 days. 1/2 breastmilk + 1/2 formula for 3-5 days. 1/4 breastmilk + 3/4 formula for 3-5 days. Substitute a bottle for one of the breastfeedings (probably nighttime since your supply is probably low) for however much time you determine. Then substitute a bottle for two of the breastfeedings. So on and so forth. Keep substituting and eventually you'll be down to one breastfeeding a day. Then you can completely wean him when you're ready. Have your husband feed the baby with a bottle. Then you'll really get a break! Weaning is emotional for both the baby and the mom because of the bond. Good luck.

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M.O.

answers from Denver on

Start slow but I would wait until he is a year just for the additional benefits of breastfeeding for 12 mos.

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T.P.

answers from Denver on

Hello M., You may be interested in reading, "The Nursing Mother's Guide to Weaning," by Kathleen Huggins and Linda Ziedrich. It is a good read. ~T.

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