Video Games at Afterschool Day Care

Updated on November 18, 2014
J.W. asks from Portland, OR
21 answers

My 5yo son gets out of school at noon and he's in day care until 5:15. We just started with this day care at the beginning of the school year, and it's the first tme he's been mostly with older kids (5-9 years old). (For the last 4 years he's been with all pre-school or younger age kids during the day.) I would love to hear how much, if at all, school age kids who are in after school care play video games. When we interviewed the day care we were told that if all the kids finish thier "after school workbooks" that on Fridays they get to take turns playing the Wii for about 2 hours (which lets each kid play for about 1/4 that time). But in the last few weeks instead of taking advantage of the weather being nice - which will change soon - they have been playing 2-3 times a week for a few hours. And yesterday, since my son was the only older kid until 2:30, the day care gal played the same racing game with him ALL DAY so he could get better and not always be beaten by the other kids who play it better than he does. We only let our son play on his tablet (which has angry birds and one racing game) on the weekends; during the week he can watch an hour of tv a day. Now he's getting all this extra screen time at day care and he's not being taken outside to play while it's light out. Am I overreacting by admitting I want to look for another day care (I don't have much experience with school age kids these days)? Thanks for the feedback!

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L.G.

answers from Austin on

I only hear bad things about that much screen time. I'd look for different daycare that stresses creative play time.

1 mom found this helpful
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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

No, you are not over reacting. My child's after school program only allows electronics on Friday as a reward if they are good all week. And I know they only have them on Fridays, because the center doesn't have any, the kids have to bring in their own iPods to play (and my son only bothers to take his on Fridays). The other days of the week, after they finish homework, if it is nice out then they go outside. If it's not nice out, they either play indoor games (sometimes they play 2-square in the hall, or a base-ball like game with a paper ball that doesn't fly far), or they play legos, blocks, etc.

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G.♣.

answers from Springfield on

My boys go to daycare after school. They are there between 2 and 3 hours, depending on how soon my husband is able to pick them up.

They rarely do tv or electronics. On days there is no school or a half day they will usually have a movie in the afternoon. I think they let the kids have electronics for a bit on some Fridays, but I don't think it's every Friday.

It's not going to hurt to talk to the director about it and ask for a clarification. I wonder if the decision to let him play the game was partly because he was the only school age kid there. Does that happen often? The kids at our daycare all go to the same school, so they all get out at the same time and you would not have the situation of only one school age kid being there.

I recommend approaching the director with a "clarification." Try not to be upset when you go in. If you are not happy with the answers, maybe it's time to pursue other options. But definitely listen and see if maybe there were special circumstances that are unlikely to come up again anytime soon.

5 moms found this helpful
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L.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would look for another day care, but I'd be careful about the criteria I was using to judge quality. Both activities you mentioned (workbooks & video games) sound like a terrible after school environment for kids. It's a lot of sitting!
Our after school program is K-8, so a mix of Granted, in SoCal, our weather is better than PDX, but our after school care spends from 3:15-4:45 outside, running around on a playground/field or doing enrichment classes. Kids can pick from Engineering, Mad Science, Chess, Arts & Crafts, Dance, Cheer, etc. You can sign your kid up for homework help, if you want to. After 4:45, the kids come into a huge room where they have all kinds of toys to play with - forts to build, blocks to build towers, legos, dress up, books to read, puzzles. The counselors also get the kids engaged in group play - hide & seek, duck-duck-goose, hot/cold find the hidden object, etc. around 5:30 they pick up & have a movie playing for the last few kids that get picked up at 6.
IMO, kids spend all day at school sitting, doing worksheets, being told how to behave. The older they get, the more this will be the case. Kids need time to just run around, play games, build friendships, goof off. I don't think you get that from video games. If my kid was playing video games for 5 hours (!), I'd seriously question the quality of the care - from the facility, the director on down to the teacher/counselors.

4 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

The state usually has rules/laws pertaining to times outside. If the weather is a certain degree or dangerous for the kids they aren't allowed outside. If the kids share the playground with kids of other ages they can only go outside at certain times.

If his center has the school kids room set apart from the other parts of the center then the may not have to lay down and take naps. In my center kids were required to lay down if they were in the center during nap time UNLESS they had completed kindergarten. Once they're 6 and it's summer they don't have to lay down anymore.

At nap time is usually when the school age kids would go outside. Once the little kids were up they had first rights to the playground. It was their scheduled time to be outside. That would leave the school age kids inside to have free time/play time from about 2:30/3 pm through closing time.

I can completely say that this center seems right on track to me. Your school age child should be playing at child care NOT doing homework or work books. Do you really want a stranger teaching your child school work? If I was there teacher I can guarantee that I'd be teaching math to them wrong. Then the teacher and you would have to be helping them un-learn what I did. So please don't even consider that the kids should do homework or workbooks at child care. They go to school to learn and not to child care to learn.

If I had the choice of this center I wouldn't have chosen it because they do workbooks. That's not their job, their job is to help your kid grow in character and responsibility and learn good citizenship.

Kids need to have play time and enjoy being a kid. Sounds like he's doing just that in child care.

3 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I liked how the one daycare provider we used only had the TV on during rainy days when they would have otherwise been outside, but we have never limited screen time for our kids. By not doing that, they don't see it as a forbidden fruit and it's not a fight in our house.

I don't care if my kids come home from a long day of school and want to unwind by playing a few video games or wathing some TV. Nor do I mind if they want to go outside for a walk, bike ride, or to play with friends.

As long as video games are not the ONLY thing your son is doing and he's not unhealthy, I don't see a big problem.

2 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Is your son unhealthy, overweight? If not please let it be! I would hate it if I sat down after work to watch my favorite show or surf my favorite websites and somebody told me to get up and go outside.
All people, adults and kids, ESPECIALLY kids, deserve some down/leisure time to do what they like.
If you have an otherwise healthy active child I don't know why this bothers you so much.
(Though I will admit that I have two avid gamers in my house, my husband and full grown son and they are both healthy, active and productive people, so therefore I don't get all the "anti gaming" rhetoric on this site.)

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

I would look into alternate care. At my daughter's daycare they do get more time on the Wii and watching movies when it's cold out, but if it's nice they take all of the big kids outside. The only Wii game they play is one of those dance games so the kids take turns with the remote, but all the other kids who want to play stand behind and do the dance moves with them anyway. I'm cool with that since at least they're all up and moving. I would not be cool with it all day or on nice days.

They do allow kids to bring tablets or the little handheld games, but that's up to the parents' discretion.

1 mom found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I wouldn't have a problem with video games one day a week, but this is too much. Our day cares are required to take kids outdoors to play every day, unless it is colder than minus 26 or there is lightning. The after school care at our local Y does not have any tv or video games. The kids go outside, to the gym, to the playstructure, swimming or they play with toys and games.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Since he's getting all this screen time at after school, he doesn't need much (if any) at home.
He won't be having this time for it when he's in full day school.

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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

When my daughter was in after school care in kindergarten they had no video game time. They had iPads, but I think each kid got 15 minutes and it wasn't very often. Maybe once a week.

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S.H.

answers from Denver on

I think you are going to get two sides here. The ones who think its totally unacceptable to pay someone to let video games entertain your kids. And others who as long as everyone is happy and they seem like an overall good daycare provider they might not think this is a big deal. Since you already have some pretty strict screen times enforced I am guessing you will probably get a long better with the one who fall in the first category. If it really does bother you that much talk to the daycare provider and tell them that if they aren't spending quality time outside you would like for him to have other projects or reading to do while the other kids get to play. Nope your son wont like that and think its totally unfair. Or you find another provider who doesnt have any electronics in the building during kid hours.

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M.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Go with your gut. If you want to find another day care, do it. This is way more screen time than you want for him, and telling them he's not allowed to do it won't work -- he will see other kids playing video games and will whine until they just let him, no matter what they tell you. Entertaining and engaging him while other kids are being babysat by screens is not something I'd expect from this place.

Our godson was in an afterschool day care where the kids were often babysat by the TV (more than by gaming). It didn't scar him for life, sure, but it was much more screen time than was good for him. It made him whine for more screen time at home too, and he had issues with bad dreams about superheroes etc. that stemmed from what he'd been watching at day care -- because his parents knew he hadn't been exposed to that stuff at home or elsewhere. His mom dropped in unannounced at day care and found them all watching a superhero show with glazed eyes and the provider admitted they watched TV every single day. Why pay someone to let your kid have screen time that YOU consider a privilege at home?

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

It would depend on what he was doing with that time. If you want him to play outside, I would ask why he wasn't outside if the weather was nice and they otherwise would be. If he plays only racing games, can you suggest or donate other games? Puzzle games, reading games, I Spy, that sort of thing? You can often get older games for PC for cheap at a thrift store or library sale.

It's been a long time since we did after care, but SD might have been on the computer on a rare occasion when there was bad weather. More often, after HW time and snacks and that sort of thing, if it was quiet or the kids weren't playing together, they would play board or card games with the caregivers.

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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

Why can't you just tell them he's not allowed?

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J.K.

answers from Wausau on

When I read "the day care gal" I smiled.

Whenever my dad is not impressed with a female, he refers to her as a 'gal'. He doesn't use any derogatory terms and is always polite, but I know if he says 'gal' he is irritated and/or really dislikes the person. My dad wouldn't let a 'gal' care for his kids.

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C.D.

answers from Atlanta on

This is not healthy physically, mentally or emotionally. Not only has it been proven that children are harmed by the screen time but you're paying someone to play video games when they could be doing something of quality with your child.

Children reflect whatever is in their environment

You may be interested in this:

http://www.celebratetherhythmoflife.com/2014/11/8-steps-t...

There's a good chance you have a Waldorf school near you that has a program that fits your needs. There would be only things that are positive and enriching. Check it out.

V.S.

answers from Reading on

We have never done daycare, but I'm kind of shocked this is done at any day care. But then again, my kids weren't playing video games of any sort at 5 other than leapstart and starfall.com, educational games. I would not be happy about this at all.

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

If it were me and I was otherwise happy with the services, I would simply be that mean mom who told her kiddo and the staff that he wasn't allowed to play video games. We have done this more than once at the gym day care (granted that's only for an hour and a half max).

If video games are the only thing going on. Or I had other problems, then yes, I would find another center.

You are not over reacting, letting a kid play video games all day to improve his racing ability is not acceptable.

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H.1.

answers from Des Moines on

I would just keep an eye on it to determine exactly how long he is playing. Maybe ask them to let you know so that they at least catch on you have some concern.

At the same time, I feel kids need time to unwind. After spending some time in preschool/kindergarten (where I am assuming he has been learning, socializing, reading, doing crafts, singing and exercising) he is entitled to some serious down time. I know that when I have had a long day, I love to stare blankly at a TV :)

But of course, you chose what you want for him and if you don't like it, you are of course entitled to move him or try to work with the provider on the issue. I know there is a wide spectrum on how much screen time parents give kids but we must remember our children are small and can get exhausted by the demands of our busy lives.

Best of luck and only you can know whats best for your family!

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I wouldn't pull him out immediately. First of all, since he is getting screen time at daycare, you can be more restrictive with screen time at home. I would just tell him. "you had screen time at daycare today, so after dinner we are going to go outside, read, play a game, etc" and not have TV in the evening. Second, I would talk to his daycare provider about your concerns and that you want the screen time to be limited (as it was discussed in your interview), and for him to have more outside and creative play time. Third, start looking at different after school programs. It's not overreacting to see what other options are available. As long as he's happy and being treated well, you have some time to look for a more ideal arrangement.

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