Trying to Conceive for the 3Rd Time at 35 Yrs Old

Updated on July 29, 2010
S.N. asks from Rancho Cucamonga, CA
9 answers

My husband and I have been trying to conceive another baby for the past 3 months. I know that might not seem like a big deal, but I have never had problems before. With my 13yr old, it happened right away and with my 1yr old, it happened right away. I desperatley want to have another baby and I am not getting any younger. I also desperatley want my one yr old to have a sibling to grow up with. My 13yr old does her own thing and doesn't play with the baby, which is to be expected-and when she was young she had a cousin 6months younger who she grew up with. Anybody out there finding it difficult to conceive due to age????? Any advice??

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answers from Milwaukee on

Hi S.,

We are kinda in the same boat. I just turned 38 years old and have two beautiful daughters ages 4 yo and 19 mo. It took 3 years of trying (and eventually fertility drugs) to conceive my first daughter, and then 9 months (totally natural) to conceive my second. We are trying for #3 and are also hoping for that boy this time around to complete our family. We have been trying for 2 months. I told my husband I don't want to do fertility drugs this time around (even though because of my age it may help speed things along) and if its meant to be, than we will conceive naturally again but once I turn 40 the womb is closed for babymaking. I actually think it was easier to conceive my second at age 35 because I wasn't stressed about getting preggers. I was too busy dealing with my first daughter. When you least expect it and stop trying, it WILL happen. And 3 months is really not that long even if you got preggers pretty easy in the past. I would not get discouraged - I don't think your age will be a factor in getting preggers at all. Have fun, enjoy your two and #3 will be here shortly. Good luck and I hope we are both blessed in the near future!!!!



answers from Los Angeles on


I read your profile and I think you still have a good chance that you'll get pregnant as long as you do your regular doctor visits. Just remember that after every pregnancy your body changes. After you had your one year old your body must have changed, and remember as you age your body changes as well. But no worries keep on trying, don't give up and good luck with. Take Care. :)



answers from Los Angeles on

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answers from Honolulu on

As the others said, 3 months isn't a long time. Try not to 'stress' about it, as stress itself can impede conceiving. I was older than you when I got pregnant with my 1st child. Try not to worry. My OB told me that if after 6 months, nothing happens, then, maybe you can talk about it with your doctor. For me, getting pregnant the first time took awhile, longer than 6 months...but the doctor still wasn't worried. Then I got pregnant when I wasn't expecting it. Then with my 2nd pregnancy, I was older still... but got pregnant naturally. I just tried not to stress about it. If your doctor can rule out biological/medical problems...then you're probably fine.(And yes, OB/GYN's check the Husband too for fertility problems etc.) But yes, as they say, our "age" (both for women AND men), can impact fertility and ability to conceive. Yes, the MEN too. Is your Hubby older or younger or the same age? I know it's hard, but try not to worry about it or stress about it or feel anxious. Just have fun trying. Keep in mind your 'ovulation' days and symptoms and track it in a calendar. During ovulation is typically the only window of time a women can get pregnant, although I know there seems to be women out there who can get pregnant anytime it seems. There are also "ovulation calculators" online that you can do a "google" search for. It helps, as that is what I did. Good luck!



answers from Los Angeles on

hi to all the mothers i'm new on here . i'm faceing the same sitution i have 4 children me and my husband been trying 4 a year now so now we eat more fish pills;vetables ;fish;vitamins foods with folic acid is very important ;exciseing plays a big part look im 39 yrs old its possiable be postive wishes.god bless. M. riley



answers from Los Angeles on

I conceived first try with my daughter at age 24. Now I am 33 and pregnant but we tried for three months before I got my positive. I have an exact 31-day cycle, could always tell when I was ovulating, and yet it took three tries. My doctor wouldn't even see us for infertility for 6 months, some doctors say to try for a year before they consider you problematic.

Good luck!



answers from Los Angeles on

You are right, 3 months is not a long time. Keep trying. Unless something has changed healthwise b/w you or your hubby, it's likely you just need to relax and it will happen. I was 39 when I first conceived and 40 for the birth. I concevied right away and although I had every test in the world, baby and I were completely healthy and fine. You are putting too much pressure on yourself - wanting it too much right now. Relax, and put your focus on something else (and of course 'do it' when ovulating) and it will happen. You are clearly a fertile turtle - just be patient!



answers from Los Angeles on

Hi S.! I'm 30 and I have two girls (10 and 8). I'm recently remarried and my husband and I tried for like a year before we were finally able to get pregnant (I'm almost 2 months along now).

After about 4 months of trying, I asked my doctor what was wrong (I had NO problems getting pregnant in the past) - I was concerned that it was my age, my weight, the length of time since my last pregnancy, or any other thing that was preventing it from happening right away. He said that most couples who try conceive within the first year and asked me to wait until then before they started checking for fertility problems. It was hard to wait and I swear I took a pregnancy test every time my period was an hour late, but here we are finally ... it literally was about 11 months.



answers from San Diego on

Wow! You sound exactly like Me! I have a 12 yr old & a 2 1/2 yr old & a 1 yr old. All Girls! My Husband & I had no problem conceiving. I was 35 when I became pregnant with my last daughter. It happened right away. I don't think 35 is OLD! Hee Hee! Just keep trying Sweetheart. The only difference with Doctor's appointments, once you get pregnant, is that he/she will recommend more test for "older aged women." We tried for the Boy each time, but got Girls, instead. I LOVE it! Now, I wouldn't know what to do with a Boy. Good luck!

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