Transition from Family Bed to Crib - Kila,MT

Updated on August 14, 2010
C.K. asks from Rancho Palos Verdes, CA
12 answers

Hi Ladies - My 7 month old daughter is breast-fed with some solids foods. She been co-sleeping with me at night to facilitate nursing, and has never really made friends with her crib. Because she doesn't like to be in her crib, she has also been napping on our king size bed. But she is getting bigger and is rolling all over the place, and even the center of the king bed is no longer safe. Does anyone have any tips for how to transition her to sleeping in her crib? I am anticipating this being difficult because she cries anytime I leave her in her crib awake for a few minutes, and even when she appears asleep in my arm, the second her butt hits the crib mattress she starts to wail (how can she know the difference?). She is the happiest easiest baby and the thought of letting her scream for any length of time just kills me. Any ideas or just your experiences would be so helpful. thanks!

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J.P.

answers from Boise on

I didn't co sleep, but did have my babies in the room with me for the first couple of months. For my daughter, we are having her nap in her crib right now, and when she gets another week or so under her belt of sleeping through the night she will move there for nights too.

The only way I know to do it is that they have to cry a little. I give my daughter 2 minutes, then go in and soothe, then 5 minutes and soothe. It has worked for us.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Make her crib comfy and cozy.
Crib mattresses are real hard... for me, I put padded the crib mattress by putting a blanket UNDER the fitted sheet, for my son. Then, both my kids liked having (baby safe) stuffed animals in their crib. We also had the Fisher Price "Ocean Wonders" crib toy on the crib, which they both liked and would operate it on their own.
AND, by 6 months old, my son had a lovey.... a stuffed toy that he just gravitated toward. So he slept with that too.
I breastfed my kids, exclusively. Both of them.

I sometimes co-slept with my kids... more often than not. But for naps and at night, they started off in the crib. If need be, then I just slept with them on a floor futon in our room, not in our bed.

Also, at this age, they get 'separation anxiety.' This is developmental. So they want you, look for you, wake and want to see you etc. But its normal.
Also they may be teething at this age.
Many things going on at the same time.

If/when you transition her to the crib... start with naps first.
But make any pre-nap/bedtime... a daily regular ROUTINE. The SAME routine everyday. A baby, will get used to a 'routine.'

After you nurse her.... well for me, I would not then just plunk my kids in the crib. I had a routine. First nurse. Then, carrying them, I would walk into the room and stand next to the crib, then I'd sing a song & rock them. I sang the SAME song each time. When I felt their body relax, I'd put them in the crib. Then I'd close the mini-blinds and turn on a fan on low for white-noise. Then I'd say good night. Then walk out the door and close the door behind me.
I did the SAME exact routine, in the SAME sequence, every day, every night. For example.

good luck,
Susan

2 moms found this helpful

E.D.

answers from Seattle on

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2 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

Good suggestions about making that crib mattress more comfy.. Also sleep with her sheets for a day or 2, get your scent on it.

Also when you place her in the crib, place her with her head up against the corner of the crib pad. She will like that slight pressure up against her head.

Lay her down on her stomach she will sleep better. Since she rolls she will be safe.

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M.P.

answers from Chicago on

We have always bed-shared with our kids and had no problems with a queen size bed. As they got bigger, I kept the monitor glued to me and put a bed rail up and ran up the stairs as soon as they woke up until they learned how to get out of bed on their own which happened sometime after a year old. It worked fine and if you want to continue to co-sleep it can work fine. I can't help you on the crib, never really used it.

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T.D.

answers from Cleveland on

If you still enjoy co-sleeping but are fearful of her crawling off the bed during naps you could try putting your mattress on the floor for now instead of on the frame. This way she can't fall off the bed and you can continue co-sleeping. Another option would be to sidecar the crib. Here is an idea on how to do it.. http://www.freewebs.com/sidecarcrib/index.htm. It gives the child the safety of the crib and their own space but still allows for having a family bed and easy night nursing. This set-up also gets the baby used to the crib while still having the co-sleeping that they already know. It makes for a very gentle transition.

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E.E.

answers from New York on

I don't have any "move to the crib" advice as our 2 year old is still in bed with us, but you could always put bed rails on the bed.

Or, I just line the bed with pillows around the edge (and bunch up the comforter on the bottom).

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J.D.

answers from Denver on

Have you ever laid down on a crib mattress? They are generally hard as a rock. Now I still have a lot of problems getting our 2nd daughter to sleep in her crib, but one thing that helped was a really soft mattress pad and sheet--almost like chenille. It was a lot nicer and both girls sleep better when I'm using that sheet. I also found it helps when my husband puts her down. I do also leave her in the middle of the king bed (while I'm in the room) with body pillows on either side of the bed. I co-slept/sleep too & ended up with a double bed mattress on the floor in their rooms. They would start in the crib and then with a big wakening, I would go sleep on the mattress with her. I never regretted my co-sleeping time and miss being next to my older daughter (though now I'm with the 2nd one). Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Denver on

My advice is to get her started in the crib with her naps. My son was the exact same way - EXACT!! We also co-slept for nursing.... but getting him to nap was a nightmare - if I wasn't sleeping next to him. But one day I just decided I was going to sit there and keep putting him in the crb until he stayed there sleeping. Everytime he woke and cried when I laid him down, I just picked him up and started over. There really was an art to laying him down without waking him - both my husband and I would come up with techniques and share them. There is this magical time when they fall asleep enough (not too little) but not for too long, that you can get them on that mattrss and leave them there.
I also went out of my way to make that crib the most fantastically comfortable place to sleep a baby could ever want, with organic sheets, and silky blankets, and friendly prints and patterns. He likes to stand in there and look out sometimes for fun. I do not encourage play in the crib because it should be a place to sleep, but that shows me he likes it there.
You may also consider if your baby has a dark enough or quiet enough spot in her room - is your room more comfortable in any of these ways?

Mostly though I will say it's perserverance. Good luck. I don't let my baby cry either. And now at 19 months he is totally in his crib, always, and totally happy there.

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A.B.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My son slept with me till he was one year old. Then I put his crib right next to my bed and put him to sleep in that. He was upset and angry and he cried a lot, so I sat next to him and rubbed his back or leg or head to comfort him and told him it was bed time. Everytime he tried to sit up I just laid him back down and told him it was bedtime. He would cry for a while until he realized that I was not going to pick him up but that I was still there to comfort and love him while he fell asleep. I did that until he went to sleep and then I went to bed. When he woke up during the night I would not pick him up I simply rubbed and touched him to comfort him back to sleep. Before too long he stopped fighting me and went to sleep almost as soon as I put him down. After a while I moved his crib across the room and eventually into his own room. The key is to be consistent but you don't just let them cry it out you still offer comfort like back rubbing. Also remain calm and confident because the baby will pick up on it if you are unsure and upset. You need to reassure the baby that she will be fine and that her bed is a safe and secure place to sleep. It takes patience because you might spend an hour or more getting her down at first and there will be times when you finally go to bed and she wakes up ten mins later but don't give up. I now have a 3month old daughter who is sleeping with me and I plan to use this method with her when she is old enough.

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R.J.

answers from Atlanta on

i have 5 children and all of them slept with my husband an I because i beast-fed as well. we have a set of twin girls that was hard for me to put in there room, but what i did was the pillows that i slept on i put it in the crib so that my sent was in the crib, so when they fall asleep and you lay her down she can still smell you....that is how they know the differents your sent is not in there bed. So try that and good luck!!!!

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T.W.

answers from Denver on

My first child was like this and I never figured out how to get him in his room. He was 9 before he stayed in his room consistently. My second hated sleeping with us and my third is 50/50. I have no idea how to transition, some kids are just like that. I was told for years to let them cry it out or put a lock on the door and I just never felt good about it. My guess is, it was the best solution.

Good luck. I have one more on the way, so I will be watching you posts to see what everyone suggests. I want this newest baby to be like my second that loved sleeping in his crib. = )

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