Toys.. How Much Is Enough?

Updated on April 08, 2008
J.S. asks from Saint Paul, MN
6 answers

I have two boys that are 20 months apart (ages 3 and 16 months). I feel like we have a ton of toys, until we go to play at our friends houses and then when we come home I look around and think, maybe I am wrong, because all the other kids seem to have SO MUCH more than we do.

My question is, how much is enough? We live in a small house, and most of the toys need to be stored in family space (meaning the living room and our office closet). We plan on moving next spring, and hope to have a better option for play space (we are expecting #3, and this house is too small for 3 kids). In the mean time, I really feel like my kids have a lot, but wonder if I am being to restrictive about getting them new (or used) stuff because of space. We have a big bucket of little cars, several puzzles, play dough, an art box, various big vehicles to push around, books, blocks, a tiny kitchen, some little people... the basics I guess. It just seems like their friends (the 3 year olds especially) have a bigger variety and more of everything.

How much stuff do your toddlers and preschoolers have? Are there things that you feel are really important to your kids?

Thanks for your wisdom!

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

I think a better question would be, how much is too much? My two boys have a large quantity and variety of toys that are always all over the place, despite the fact they have a play room. In my husband's and my opinion, they have way too much! Honestly, I think they would be just as happy with a fraction of what they own, not that we're willing to get rid of anything right now. My boys spend mostly play with blocks, cars, and action figures. Everything else sits on the shelf most of the time.

My oldest is pretty spoiled. He is used to people (grandparents, aunts) giving him things and, even though we tell him no A LOT and rarely buy him things just for the heck of it, he feels entitled and is never satisfied with what he has. It is so frustrating trying to teach him to be grateful for what he has and to not be greedy. I know a lot of it has to do with age, but nip it in the bud while you still can.

Don't feel bad about not having as much as your friends do, and don't be in a hurry to try and catch up. It's sounds like you have plenty of fun activities to entertain and stimulate creative play.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

I wouldn't worry about keeping up with the Joneses. You should have as many toys as your housing situation and budget dictates. Kids in other countries go nuts over 1 doll or 1 soccer ball. (IMO, kids shouldn't have more toys than they can play with in a day!) Food for thought: If you hid a couple of your kids' toys, would they even notice? How long would it take?

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T.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Honestly, if your kids can keep busy during the day and be creative with limited TV time, then you probably have just enough toys.

What I've found with my kids, is they have just as much fun with the 'basic' toys that my inlaws have (left over from when my husband was little) that they do with all the things we have at home. And sometimes I think the basics bring out more creativity in their play.

Sometimes I even think we have too much stuff. Half the time, most of the toys stay in the toy box. My Oldest (2) seems to have his 'favorites' and my 10 month old (they are 20 months appart too), just seems to pull it out to look at it then moves on.

I usually got through ours every few months and pack up what's not being played with until the younger one might be old enough for it.

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R.F.

answers from Minneapolis on

I think you are right on track. Kids don't need a ton of toys, they just need the right toys. I actually notice with my son that the more choices he has the less he plays with any of them. My son (2 1/2) plays most with the toys that spur his imagination and don't contain batteries. He has a ton of toys (due to being an only grandchild/nephew) and we are drowning. We are currently fixing up a houses and will be moving-in in the next couple of weeks. We have been living with my parents for the last couple of months while fixing, so lots of my son's toys have been packed away. He does not miss them a bit. I think I am going to donate them to charity before he ever even sees them again.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Here is what we have and sometimes I think it is too much. But he plays with almost everything regularly because anything I feel he doesn't use is put into the give away closet.

In the family room we have open shelves with a bin of each of these items:

Duplo blocks
Lincoln logs
musical instruments
small cars/trucks
puppets
airplanes w/ runway pieces
balls
plastic zoo and farm animals
wooden blocks

On a bookshelf in the same room he has 2 Fisher Price scenes, a push around truck, Wedgits, lacing cards, Geomags, and a few misc. items.

He has quite a few puzzles but we are getting ready to retire about half of them because they are too simple.

In his room he has a wooden train set, a small wooden doll house, a small toy chest with dress up clothes/costumes/hats, and tons of books.

And finally in the living room we keep a Fisher Price kitchen, 6 small plastic baskets with various dishes and play food and a cash register. He also has his woodden castle that he got from his grandparents. It takes up a fair amount of room but he adores it. Oh and we have a wooden chest full of board games (we play 2-3 board games a day!).

If you notice, most of my son's toys are open ended because they hold his attention a lot longer that way. If you look around his friends' houses you will probably notice that many of their toys are battery operated (which in my opinion takes a lot of the imagination out of playtime) and rather close ended. Toys like that are fun and exciting when you first get them but then kids become bored with them much quicker. It sounds like you have a good amount of toys for your kids and that you have chosen very open ended options for them. Kids will always ask for more but if they are engaging in imaginative play then they have enough.

An interesting aside...my son attends a local preschool that has tons of great open ended wooden toys, games, and puzzles. But he attended a preschool in Costa Rica for 2 weeks this winter. They had a broken Fisher Price bus, a broken Fisher Price airplane, a plastic doll house with no dolls or furniture, a box of wooden blocks, and a tub of Duplo blocks. This was all for 10-12 kids. The first day my son was complaining that there weren't enough toys to play with and just sat off to the side. The second day he figured out a great game to play using the dollhouse and some of the wooden blocks. He was happy as could be. Kids don't need much to have a great time.

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C.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

I sympathize with you. Most of my son's toys have come from Unique Thrift Stores. They have several around town and a great one in Burnsville. It was my in-laws who would shower him with toys every single week. Their feelings would be hurt if I told them he had too many toys so I would graciously accept them. But whenever I felt he had too many toys, I would just go through and fill up a garbage full and then pass them on to friends. So, my advice is, if you feel they have too many, give away some of them. I do the same thing with books. We go to the library every week and check out books that I decided that we would only own as many books as would fit in his bookcase. (We were also overflowing with those courtesy of the thrift stores.)When we get to have too many, I weed them out. He's now 3 and thankfully, the in-laws have realized that they do not need to be giving him toys all the time.
The other thing is that if you have friends, you'll find that they would be more than happy to let you borrow any toys or books, if you ask. It'll get it off their hands and let your kid have "new" stuff to use.

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