Toddler Pillow and Sleeping in Bed Not on It?

I am from Holland and there we do not use blankets and sheet, but down (or fiber filled) soft and light comforters and comforter covers (duvets?). This means you sort of throw over this soft fluffy light but warm "poof". The other wonderful thing is that we never make beds, we just throw the comforter over the foot rail of the bed to air it out. We each have one (hubbie and I have our own) and when it is too hot you stick out a leg or "straddle" the poofy bag between your legs and then when you get cool you cover all or part of yourself.
I hate the weight of blankets and the mess of trying to keep a sheet and blankets together - the sheet always ends up at the bottom of the bed and then I have only a scratchy blanket over me.
Right now, thecompanystore.com is having a sale on their down comforters. 800-285-3696. They are not cheap but guaranteed for life. I usually buy the comforter covers (flannel for winter, cotton for summer) at Lands End.

My son is 4 years old and also on the spectrum. His OT did some work with a weighted blanket which he enjoyed. We also got him a pressure vest (not weighted) that we use for calm times. My son fairly recently started pulling the covers up on himself, but he has tolerated it for a while. Play games with him like using big blankets to try swaddling him like a baby. Definitely talk to his OT. If he doesn't have one, I suggest you get one. As he gets older, you will find more and more "sensory issues" that a good OT will have many tactics to work with. Best wishes.

Most little toddlers sleep on top of the blankets most of the time. I don't think you said exactly how old your toddler is. Just put him in layers to sleep at night. Do you have a pair of the feet PJ's that are warm? Put undershirt and other not so warm pj's on him under those and he won't even need the blanket really. I think I did tuck in the blankets when the kids were around 3 or so and in a twin bed and that kept them covered but they can get under them, do need to get out to potty, etc. If he's still in a crib I would just throw it over him and if it's off don't worry if you've dressed him warm enough to not need a blanket. Don't get him too warm though if you do add the blanket if it's very heavy and warm. I never gave my kids pillows until they were in twin beds and some not even then depending on when they moved to a twin bed. I know people do that now earlier but we were told it is better for them to not have one. If you do get one be sure it's flatter than most. You don't want their neck bent too much. I think around 3 they should be able to use a regular pillow if in a bed but while in a crib I wouldn't do it although I know many who do and they use a standard sized pillow. Toddlers do well without one and why add more in the bed to worry about?

We layer and I use baby legs on my son. He loves them and he is 3. Sometimes he wears them on the inside of his pj's or on the outside, whatever his mood is telling him.

Sorry, not responsive to the in bed & pillow question, but here's a trick my mom used on us. She wrap a cloth diaper/ receiving cloth around our midriffs and secure them with a safety pin in the back. It would be folded to sit between our armpits and hips. She thought it was an added measure of protection for her very wriggly kids who would throw off their covers.

I would start out with a fitted sheet and a blanket, but no top sheet. Those seem to make people feel trapped more than a blanket. And I would also tuck in the bottom of the blanket to keep it from falling off the bed, but keep the sides free so he can sleep a little more freely. Good luck!

Would he like a Pillow Pet? They are adorable and functional! Both my kids have one and my daughter just sort of uses hers as an accessory but my son sleeps on his as his primary pillow every night! He goes crazy about it! Maybe he could pick one out.