Toddler Nightmares?

Updated on October 20, 2008
L.M. asks from Norwich, NY
8 answers

My 2 year old son is waking up in the middle of his afternoon naps crying. He is just screaming and it takes several minutes to settle him down. He is usually sweaty also. Once he is settled he says that he is still tired and wants to go back to sleep and he does for maybe 30 minutes or so. At first it was just when he was at daycare and I was trying to brainstorm why he may be doing it, is he too hot or something. Now it's happening more and more at home too. It doesn't seem to be at night, I think he did it once when it was bedtime after about an hour of being asleep. I thought they were night terrors that I have heard about, but never experienced and from what I've read they don't seem that dramatic. I didn't know if any of you ladies have ever experienced this and what you did if anything. My daughter never did this so I don't have anything to compare to. Thanks for your time!

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S.P.

answers from New York on

I haven't experienced it yet (my son is only 6 months old), but a good friend of mine is having the same exact experience with her 18-month-old daughter, and the doctors diagonosed it as "separation anxiety." Best of luck!

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K.J.

answers from New York on

Hi L.,
Yup, I've been there. My son did the same thing during naps, and occasionally during the night. It was very scary. I was sure he was dreaming, but what could he have been afraid of since we don't let him see anything scary/violent. I too, thought it was night terrors, but didn't think it was severe as what I'd read. Anyway, my point is that he's growing out of it. This began when he was 2 or 2 1/2 and he'll be 3 in January. He rarely has these episodes anymore. It must be a "stage" thing, as Hannah previously mentioned. This too shall pass. Good luck L..

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S.G.

answers from New York on

im so glad that you posted this request. i have been thinking of posting the same thing but felt a lil silly about it. my son is 28 months and is going through the same thing. sometimes an hour after he falls asleep sometimes all hours in the middle of the night. sometimes its so bad he wakes up and sometimes he is just screaming in his sleep. he actually says things like "no dont get me" or he will get upset over something he saw on tv and actually dreams about it at night. he also screams and says things that sound like a whole different language. i have tried not letting him watch any tv before bed, doesnt seem to work. if it continues much longer i will talk to his pediatrician about it.he also talks a lot in his sleep calmly. like he has a whole conversation in his sleep. i know this doesnt give any solutions but at least u know ur not alone!

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D.N.

answers from Albany on

When my son Connor was right around the same age, he did that too, and when it happened for the 3rd. time, my husband asked me to please pray that Connor 'lose' whatever this was....... We did pray about it, but we also chatted with Connor, who was 23 months old and I think that helped as well. Knowing that his momma and daddy were there for him to listen to him, reassure him, love him and just be there for him helped a lot. He really took it all in..... every word and hug. What happened to Connor is that he loved his nap time...... would say; "Momma can I hold you?" and as soon as I picked him up after this request from my wee one, he'd put his head on my shoulder and suddenly be out cold! When I put him down for nap or bed, he'd lay right down, look at each one of his stuffed animals set up in a row at his head in turn, then he'd plop his little head down and go right to sleep. He was so good! It was precious stuff! Then I'd always have to go check to see if Connor was awake yet, because he'd wake up and just play quietly in his crib until I'd come to get him. He'd never cry or call out to me. He loved being in his crib and would just play quietly. That was 'his space' and he enjoyed it. Well, one day, when he had been sleeping for about two hours in the middle of the day, I suddenly heard him screaming!!! I thought: "Oh my goodness, he's fallen out of his crib!" I ran up the stairs and into his room to find him standing at one end of his crib with his mouth wide open, crying so hard that there was now no sound coming from him. Taking advantage of his wide open mouth, I checked for any blood, thinking maybe he hit his mouth on the side of the crib. No blood. I picked him up and it took a good ten minutes to calm him down. After reassuring him, hugging him and kissing those chubby cheeks, I asked: "What happened Connor?" He pointed to the bedroom window, so I carried him over to it.... he pointed down to my neighbors driveway and said: "Doggie hit car... doggie boo-boo..... Sarah (our neighbor) cry, Momma cry..... I cry." I held him close and told him; "Don't worry Honey, that was just a dream..... it wasn't real..... it was just a story in your head, it's okay..... everything's okay Honey." I lavished him with kisses and hugs and then made the family dog, Emily come up to see Connor to reassure him that she was okay. Connor got over it, but I had never seen him so upset before and it took longer than usual to calm him down. It turns out that the very next day, a little white puppy was hit by a car right at my neighbor Sarah's driveway, at the exact spot that little Connor had pointed to the day before! And with Connor on my him, we saw the whole thing. I could not believe it! I was kicking myself for not seeing that it was Connor's dream becoming reality right in front of us! I had been sitting on my front stoop with my 3 & 1 year old sons, when Sarah walked by with a little white puppy...... I said; "Oh! You have a new puppy?!" She said no, that the puppy came out from nowhere and followed her home, so she was going to call the humane society. We walked over to her house with her and while she was making the call, Connor and I watched while my son Cooper and Sarah's 2 daughters too played with the puppy in the long driveway. Suddenly, without any warning, the puppy bolted toward the road..... took off running down the long driveway, ran right into the road and was hit and killed by a car. I looked at Connor, he looked at me.... and I said; "Oh my goodness...... your dream......" I felt so bad! I should have realized, I should have held on to that puppy! The kids were playing with him and we had no idea he would suddenly bold like that! Two more times my son Connor had dreams that ended up coming true.... not nearly as frightening as this one was, but it was then that my husband asked me to please pray that Connor lose this 'ability' or 'sixth sence' that he seemed to have. We both prayed about it. As a wee one, Connor would very often say something that had everything to do with what I was thinking at that moment. He did this sort of thing until he was four years old. It was quite a connection between him and me. Now that Connor is a teen.... 16, I look back on those days with joy...... because lots of those connections were happy ones..... he is much more independent now of course, so we don't have that connection any longer, but that's okay. He's doing his own thing now, but I'm always there when Connor needs me and he knows that. I would suggest talking to your wee one about his nightmares or dreams and just see what he has to say. I always gave Connor time to gather his thoughts to tell me on his own what he needed to say. I could almost 'see those wheels moving' while he gathered his thoughts, so I'd wait and just listen to him. Now that little guy is in a training school to become a pilot! He's very smart and he is going places for sure. Good luck.
D.

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C.Z.

answers from New York on

Hi L.,

It could be night terrors. It is a condition where a child will be terrified and scream uncontrollably for a while then settle down just as unexpectedly.

My son, now 13, had them for about a year from the ages of 3-4. They happen during the REM stage of sleep so about 20-40 minutes after they first fall asleep.

They are not dangerous and there isn't much to do for them.

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H.G.

answers from New York on

Night terrors can be horribly dramatic. My son is younger than yours, but has started having similar experiences at night sometimes. My doctor said it starts for some kids around his age (almost 10 months), and for others it's up through the toddler years. My son wakes up screaming and sobbing, and just can't calm down for 10-15 minutes. He won't let anybody but me hold him, and even then he'll just keep crying and crying. It's really awful. He is such a happy kid usually, and almost never cries- but these occasional night terrors just freak me out completely!

The doctor told me it was pretty common, even though it's so horrible for us mamas. All we can do is hold our kids (if it helps), and soothe them until they are ready to sleep again. My friend's little girl would actually never wake up completely, and would just scream and cry in her sleep. Isn't this an awful stage to go through??

Luckily, it's just that- a stage.

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C.C.

answers from New York on

Hi. I think my almost 2 year old(22 month old) is going through the same thing and I am not sure if it is night/sleep terrors or not. He is often waking up from his naps screaming for me(when I am there and calling for me when at daycare, saying to his caregive-"Mamma gone" and crying). And, at night, he is up a few times and extremely upset for a few minutes. The only thing that comforts him is to bring him in bed with us. Even when he is in bed, he is up every few hours looking for me, as if in a panic. We don't know what to do-if it is just a seperation anxiety phase or bad nightmares about us leaving and not coming back? L.-I would, too, appreciate any advice/thoughts from other moms!!! I am exhausted and we are expecting our second in April.

C.-mom of Michael-who we love more than life...he is the best. It took three years to have him and he was worth the wait. My husband and I have been married for 10 years.

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B.F.

answers from New York on

Dear L., try to keep him away from the TV and Computer for a month and see if it will help. B.

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