Tips for Being Away from 2 Year Old When New Baby Comes

You've had so many great stories already! My son was 25 mo old when my daughter was born. BIL watched him (well slept on the couch) the night I went into labor so hubby could be with me at the hospital. Then hubby went home and stayed with my son. I only had to stay at the hospital for one more night after she was born (because she was born at almost midnight the night before, they wanted me there for more than 24 hrs). The day after she was born, hubby and BIL brought my son to the hospital. I almost tear up just typing this - it was ONE of the sweetest moments of my life. I had missed my son SO much (SAHM too and he was never away from me for that long B4) and when he walked in and met his little sister it was so special! When they came in, I handed off the new baby sis to daddy and got my son to crawl in bed with me and tell me all about what he had be doing - tried to just get so "alone time" in you know. We looked at one of his favoriet ABC books that his dad had been smart enough to pack for him. (you might want to do this before hand :) I didn't do this, but afterward I heard the idea to have a little "gift" for the older sibling from their new little sibling - cute idea.
Another thing - when I got home, the first time I had to change my son's (25 mo old) diaper again, he seemed so huge! I had only not done it in 2 days, but my newborn daughter was so small it was just a shocking contrast!!
And when ever feeding baby #2, I sat on the couch instead of my favorite rocker recliner that I sat in with baby #1, that way they were both included. And I kept a basket of books next to the couch, so as I feed baby sis, I could also read to my son - super special bonding time for both!!!

My son (19 months old when his sister arrived) did better than I expected him to while I was at the hospital. I think I was having a much harder time than he was. What helped the most was having my mother (who stayed with him) bring him in during visiting hours to play in my room and just be with me, eat lunch with me, etc. That and having my husband go home regularly to check on him. Your pregnancy hormones are probably contributing to your anxiety about this, but please remember that it is actually a very short period of time in the grand scheme of things. Good luck.

When I first read your question I thought to myself, well that's awfully silly, but then when I stopped to think about it, I remembered more what it was like myself. My kids are not quite 18 months apart, and while neither pregnancy was planned, both were blessings. I definitely remember crying the entire way to the hospital to have my c-section with my youngest because I felt like I was betraying my son by bringing a new baby into the house. I knew I wouldn't be able to focus 100% of my time & attention on him & I felt like he was so young it wasn't fair to him. If only I knew how I would feel just a few short hours later once my daughter had arrived!! You can never truly understand how your heart can hold so much love for not 1, but however many children you are lucky enough to bring into the world. Your love for your first does not diminish one bit, your heart just actually swells enough to hold both. Michael was very young to become a big brother, but he handled it amazingly well. He learned patience at a very young age & I learned that a lot of things I could do with them at the same time like potty training. He trained a little late & she trained fairly early, but they went through it together. Try not to stress over it too terribly much, I promise it won't be as bad as you're thinking it will.

When my youngest was born my son was 4 y/o. My Mother stayed with him at our house the first night then brought him to see us first thing in the morning. My husband took him to a jump n play that day while my Mom stayed at the hospital with me and the baby. Hubby brought him back and we all had dinner together. My hubby took oldest home that night and they had a "boys night" while I stayed in the hospital with the baby. I stayed 3 nights b/c of a c-section and I honestly don't remember what we did the third night...It worked well for all of us. I too was terrified of how he would feel ~ if we would be angry, defiant, feel left out, etc. But he did amazingly well and I had bought him a shirt that said "Best Big Brother in the World" and gave it to him to wear the day we brought home the baby.

Our first son was 16 months when our second was born. I was sooooooo stressed about leaving him. I cried for months thinking about it, and cried all the way to the hospital to deliver #2! In the end, we were both totally fine. He had a great time playing with his grandparents and cousins while I was gone (we kept him home too, we had family come to our house to watch over him while my hubby was at the hospital with me and #2). And I was so busy looking after the new baby that I really was OK.

A few things that helped me:
1) I read "I'm a Big Brother" to DS1 every single day and we talked about the new baby coming all the time. As young as he was, he knew that he was getting a new little baby brother, and that he was sooooo special because he was going to be the BIG brother! Having him be prepared worked wonderfully...he loved his little brother from the first time he saw him

2) We had people that DS1 knew, trusted and loved with him while hubby was with me at the hospital

3) We tried to keep as much of his normal routine as possible so too much didn't get disturbed

4) I got TONS of pictures and text messages letting me know how things were going on the home front! That really helped me to see his smiling face knowing that he wasn't crying all day long (not that he ever would cry all day long, but preggo hormones had me convinced that he would completely melt down w/o me...um, not so much!)

5) Hubby brought him to the hospital to visit. It was great to see him, touch him and smell him. When he left it made me appreciate that alone time with the new baby, because I knew that I would never have the amount of alone time with #2 that I did with #1. So, I really soaked up all the time I could with the new baby while I was in the hospital.

Wow, sorry this is so long!! I am preggo again, so this has been on my mind too!

We had a 22 month-old when our second was born. My in-laws and parents traded off spending the time with him, but my husband was there a lot with him also. He came to the hospital at least once a day, but he put our son to bed at night so things seemed semi-normal. The grandparents did fun things with him- took him to a restaurant, outside to play, spent a lot of one-on-one time with him that I'm sure he'd love to have now! He wasn't allowed to visit me in the hospital (I'm at-home mom too, so three days without seeing him was the longest I've ever gone!) because of the flu scare last year, but I talked to him on the phone every evening, and he was totally fine. I actually think that made it easier on him because if he had come to visit, it may have been hard to get him to leave without me! My husband was even nice enough to tell me (when I was still in the hospital, hormones central) that he "didn't even realize I was gone". Nice. Point is, I stressed too much about it beforehand too, but everything was just fine. Good luck, try not to worry, and congrats on the baby!

I am in your same boat... I am 15 weeks pregnant with my second child. My son will be 27 months old when his sibling is born. Like you, I am a SAHM, and my son is very attached to me and has a regular routine. This is what we plan on doing:

My in-laws are also coming to watch my son when I go into labor. They will be spending the night in a hotel, but during the day (while Mommy & Daddy are at the hospital) they will care for him. They have babysat him several times before, and this will be an enjoyable time to be doted on by them. My husband will be coming home at night to put my son to bed so his regular nightttime routine is not interrupted. He will wake with Daddy in the morning so his routine stays stable.

I plan on having my son come and meet the baby at the hospital the day baby 2 is born (after Mommy and baby have rested). I want him to be able to visualize where Mommy is, and meet his new brother or sister. I also plan on giving my oldest a special "Big Brother" present, and letting him acclimate to the baby on his own terms. I think having your oldest come to the hospital (while outside his routine) will help them to understand where you have been, and meet their sibling before bringing them into the home environment. We've also bought "Big Brother" books by authors such as Karen Katz to help familiarize him with the concept of a new sibling.

When I do get discharged from the hospital, I plan on spending one-on-one time with my oldest. Focusing attention on your oldest is especially important to ease the transition. I've fully come to terms that it may be hard the first few days with the change, and I think you should to.

There is no sense in having anxiety over an issue you have limited control over. I am sure your oldest child will love spending time with their grandparents. They can do special activities, maybe have them go get ice cream or go to the park. While it is very important to be concerned about your first child keeping a similar routine to what they are used to, you have to accept that bringing a second child into the home is going to disrupt that routine. When your first child was born, I'm sure you felt similar anxieties about the unknown. Know that you will adapt, and so will both your children, even if it takes time. I wish you the best of luck!

Have him come see you and baby at the hospital even see you before you have the baby. Call him on the phone to talk to him or if you can video chat with him. Um maybe have either grandparent do a welcome home baby activity

We are in a similar situation... I am 27 weeks pregnant and due within one day of my son's 3rd bday. We are also trying to figure out the logistics as well as comforting him through this transition. He is really a momma's boy and I'm nervous how he will handle my attention elsewhere. (I will have to have a c-section, will prevent me from picking him up, etc for a few weeks as well as planning to breastfeed, which is a full time committment!!)
Here are our plans... c-section will be scheduled in the morning... so I suppose my parents will take him to daycare that day. My husband will pick him up early (assumes all goes well) and he can spend the afternoon/evenings at the hospital with us. My parents will keep him that first night while my DH stays in the hospital with me the first night. After that, we plan to send him to daycare everyday for awhile (to keep routine, and because he won't want to be at the hospital all day long). But late afternoons/evenings he will spend up at the hospital with my husband and me and new baby brother. My husband will take him home the following nights while I will be at the hospital alone (with baby). Hubby will take him to daycare in morning and then come back to spend the days at the hospital with me and baby.
I have already bought some activitiy gifts/etc for him so he gets a new present every night when he comes to the hospital. He will hopefully then be better apt to handle the baby getting gifts and attention from visitors. (and it will keep him busy at the hospital!)
At least... that is our plan for now. I wish you all the best!

My daughter was 25months when my son was born and we did not have inlaws to come to our house. My daughter went to "spend then night" with my cousin, which she had never done before. My daughter had a blast, being the center of attention. She did not miss us at all, lol. After my son was born, my daughter had daddy all to herself until, mommy and the baby came home. It was actually a good thing for her and daddy to depend on each other, they formed a very strong bond. I was not in the hospital very long (normal delivery), but my daughter was daddy's girl after that. At the time I was a stay at home mom and while she and I had a great time during the day, she always looked forward to daddy coming home from that point on. So relax in the piece of mind that your son is the "Center of the World" to grandma and grandpa, while you are away, it will make your home coming very important. Plus it helps if the baby brings the older child a present. :)
Good Luck

My daughter was 27 months when my son was born. It was hard being away from her as I am a SAHM too and we did what you're planning as far as keeping her in her norm. That worked well for us. My parents just kept her busy with activities and she had so much fun I doubt she really missed me. The hardest part for me was that it was during all the H1N1 craziness and she wasn't allowed to come visit at the hospital so I literally did not see her for 2 days. Talked on the phone though. It's normal to worry, but rest assured that your time a part will go quickly and you'll resume your new "normal" soon enough. Good luck!

The less you make of it the better everyone will be. Remember these little
ones pick up on your feelings. He will be so happy to have grandparents
all to himself, all day. You will be involved with your new baby. So I would
not overthink this. You would be surprised how smoothly it all goes.
Congratulations.