Thumb Sucking - O Fallon,MO

Updated on February 11, 2008
J.M. asks from Liberty, MO
24 answers

My daughter is almost 3 1/2 and still sucks her thumb. It drives me crazy. She definitely sucks her thumb when she's tired but it's also to the point, where she does it in the car, watching tv, basically when she's in down time from running and playing. At what age do I start forcing the issue to get her to stop?

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K.C.

answers from St. Louis on

I will tell you to start now!!! My 9 almost 10 yr old stepson still sucks his thumb! He was adopted from Russia at the age of 1, unfortunately when he was a baby his thumb was all he had. We have tried everything to get him to stop, wrapped his hand up, etc. We are at the point now of taking him to the dentist to get a special retainer made. It is a very hard thing to deal with, so I would definitely advise trying to break her of her habit now!

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G.A.

answers from Springfield on

Hi J.,
I would start forcing the issue right away. My sister sucked her thumb when she was little. She is now 40 and sometimes when she gets really tired I have seen her put her thumb in her mouth. My parents tried everything to get her to stop but nothing seemed to work. Good Luck!!

G.

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D.E.

answers from Springfield on

J.,
thumb sucking is so normal. It can make there teeth protrude if they are older and continue. I would not make an issue out of it, it is her security blanket. You can try to give her something in place of security, like, if she loves cats, get her a plush cat to carry around, the transfer might take some time or might not even work. I do know, the more you point it out, the more she is aware of it. It will become a tool for her to use on any issue. You cannot control this at all. You can only watch and keep listening to you self talk, if you need more information, always look things up, a book on this is out there I'm sure. My sister-in-law had 2 kids out of 6 do this and she did absolutely nothing and their fine to this day. They do say sometimes, thumb sucking could be an escape from some kind of anxiety, is she in public school? Ask yourself questions and start seeing if theres a connection somewhere? Good luck on your search.
D. E.

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J.P.

answers from Peoria on

My son sucked his thumb until he was almost 3. It drove us nuts, but one day he just stopped. From what I've read it isn't a problem until they are still doing it at 5 which seems really ridiculous to me to have a kindergartner sucking his thumb. Try to give her something to keep her hands busy at times when she normally sucks her thumb. The other thing that we did that helped was take away the his tags....my son would usually only suck his thumb if he was holding the tag on his shirt or on a stuffed animal...we put him in tagless shirts and cut the tags off of toys and pillows...if there is something that your daughter uses w/her thumb sucking you coul try weaningher from that first.

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C.F.

answers from Tulsa on

Sucking is a natural instinct of survival. I personally don't see what all the fuss is about. Only one of my 5 children sucked their thumb and my ex hated it. It was much adoo about nothing which seemed to make it worse.
I remember the last time I saw Jeffrey sucking his thumb. He was six years and ten months old in PICU and the nurses had tied his hands down so he couldn't reach them, Jeffrey curled up in a ball so he could. I immediately untied his hands and scolded them for tying his hands! I was not embarrased or ashamed of it, but I was angry! He died 2 days later from meningitis.
So in the scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal!

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D.L.

answers from Topeka on

She sucks her thumb at those times because it is a reflex since those times are relaxing and leading to sleep. The brain in small children switches to the relaxation mode while watching tv and being rocked in a car. Unless it is bothering her teeth yet, don't worry she will quit. Normally they stop completely once they start kindergarten and are aware of friends and other's opnions. If you push the issue, it will make it worse because she will hide it or think she is being bad when she is only doing a normal human reflex. People will suggest nasty tasting medicine or hot sauce on her thumb, in our research at K-State we discovered it just teachers them to be ashamed.

Good luck,
D.

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R.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I'm currently dealing with this with my almost 7 year old. She is in first grade and has been a big thumb sucker and it's much like you described and only gotten worse. She really wanted to stop and we have tried everything to help her stop and nothing has worked. At her recent dental appointment she told the dentist that she wanted to stop but she couldn't do it. He told her about a device they could put in her mouth that sort of blocks her thumb when she tries to put it in her mouth so she becomes aware of her actions right away. She was very excited about it so we did it. It has worked like a charm! She does talk a little different, but it's not for long and because her bite was starting to shift as a result of her sucking, we did it just in time. She loves it and is very proud of herself for not sucking. I wish I would have known about it sooner, I would have been able to help her before she got into school. It did cost us about $200 that insurance didn't cover, but it's been well worth it!! Good luck to you!

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V.S.

answers from Kansas City on

My daughter sucked her thumb all the time. By the time she was 3 it had gotten so bad that her thumb was blistered, cracking, and bleeding. We tried several things, including the stop bite nail serum. At first we just tried putting stuff on the one thumb, but she would always start sucking on the other thumb. So eventually we put the nail biting stuff on both thumbs and she stopped very quickly. Her thumb is still scarred so I wish I would have started it sooner.

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M.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I had a daughter and grandaughter that sucked their thumb. Jordan is ten and does it privatetly now. Dont make a big deal about it like pinishment. they stop in their time. It is a sense of security for them. I told Jordan not to do it in front of people because they will make fun of her. I also pointed out the down falls like germs and her teeth and the thumb will look all weird someday. She gradually cut back on how often and when she did it. Good luck hopefully others have some good advice.

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M.G.

answers from Tulsa on

I have a six year old who has sucked his thumb since he was a baby. I have always believed that (as with any childhood habit) they either grow out of it when there is no longer a need for that kind of comfort, or they will eventually be talked out of it by their peers. I saw my neice have a really hard time with it, but her parents were always after her about it. I think that may increase the pressure on them, and then reinforce the habit because they have that extra stress.

Anyway, I have always totally ignored it, and he has tapered down, and now, only does it when he is sick and tired or something. So anyway, I think that works pretty well.

Good luck!
M.

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M.O.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I have the same problem w/ my 3 yr old girl. We've tried to get her to put it in her pocket. We've tried to tell her to put it away in her fist. We ridicule her in the aspect that only babies suck their thumbs. She still does it. Her doctor says that once she is in pre-k that other kids will tease her into stopping. I would hate for it to come to that. Her dentist says that its already started reshaping her mouth. I'm almost to the point of putting tabasco on her thumb. But I feel as though that is borderline cruelty. Point being, if you can figure a way to get your child to stop sucking their thumb, PLEASE give me some pointers. Thank you.

M.A.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi J.,

My 3 1/2 years old daughter does it too....and it has gotten worst since she started preschool because on of her friends does it too!
I guess it is not a big deal but she knows that I don't like it much, so if I give her a look when she is doing it and she is not in bed or tired, she stops it. I think that she is understanding that not every child does it and that it is best if she doesn't do it, but she can't help it so I won't bother too much, just let her know to try not to have it in her mouth all the time.
My worry is that she usually does it when coming from school and sometimes there too so she will pick up al the bugs going around.....
Oh well....good luck! No peeper please!!!!:)
Mariana Abadie
www.MyKidsFirst.com

D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

My 11 year old was a thumb sucker on in utero. The pediatric dentist new she was at her first check up when she was three without us saying a word to him. When she developed hand foot and mouth disease we knew we had to stop the sucking. We tried everything, taping, using the nail polish for thumb sucking and she would suck the other thumb instead. When she started preschool (1/2 day program, 4 days a week)she was to busy to suck her thumb. We told her that big girls don't suck her thumb and when we caught her we told her to get it out of her mouth. She did quit sucking it during the day and only if she were watching a movie or tv show and was settling down would she suck. She would suck it at night or whenever she slept. When she was about 7 she was really trying to make an effort to recognize when she was sucking her thumb. She didn't want to do it in school where her friends would see her. The thumb sucking finally stopped somewhere between 8 and 9 years, but nail biting started (unfortunately her dad was a thumb sucker and is now a nail biter). My mother gave her a manicure set but would not allow her to use it until she quit biting her nails. I stuck with that and helped remind her she was biting her nails. A girl I dance with was given some No Bite (walmart)to help her and we tried it. It worked. She no longer sucks her thumb, even while sleeping, or bites her nails.
It may be a process that may take years, but don't give up. I believe thumb sucking is genetic. Eventually it will stop. By the way, my daughter has perfect teeth and will not need braces. She has all of her adult teeth also. My paci girl, her younger sister, will need them. Who knew.

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J.B.

answers from Kansas City on

My daughter is 4 1/2 now, and she still sucks her thumb as well. I do not mind, because for her she has to be holding a blanket in order to even physically suck her thumb. So we have that narrowed down to bed time only. I personally sucked my thumb as well. I was ecstatic when my daughter started at 3 months because she was able to sleep finally. I am not going to worry until time for school to start, and slowly ease away the blanket. I know this isn't helping much, but it is normal and I do not know of any remedies. I also have heard that kids grow out of it all on their own.

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K.H.

answers from Oklahoma City on

My daughter is 5(will be 6 in May) and sucks on her two middle fingers WHILE playing with her belly button. There is not an option; it is both or neither. I have no problem with it other than the fact that she has indentations on her fingers from her teeth and if she has a dress on and goes to play with her belly button, she shows everyone her underwear.... so shorts always go on. And she has to still wear a 2 piece swimsuit.
When she started preschool, her teacher, without judgement, said school is not a place to suck on fingers- she explained that all the germs in her mouth get on all the toys and crayons and can get her or others sick. It is like a light switch when we go to school she stops. She is in AM kindergarten now and doesn't suck/play at school. If we have to go back in the afternoon for activites for her brother or PTA, she is usually tired so she will start to suck on them then slowly put her hands down- whithout prompting.
Our dentist's daughter sucked on the same fingers nad he agrees that it is not worth the emotional fight to make her stop- we can fix whatever it does to her teeth.
While other family members have talked to me about it being a problem, I feel she will stop when she is ready. Who am I to take away a source of comfort for her. Plus, I worry about what habit she will pick up to replace it. It is not harmful to her or anyone, yes some friends of hers comment about it and then she stops. She will learn when it is and is not appropriate. But she will also know that I love her for her- fingers and belly button and all.

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A.S.

answers from St. Louis on

I asked the orthodontist about this for my 4 1/2 year old and he said to not worry about it until the adult teeth come in. Then it has to stop. And actually it is quite decreasing now compared to just 6 months ago. I can hardly remember when I last saw her thumb in her mouth.

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R.B.

answers from St. Louis on

I was a thumb sucker as well. When my Mom caught me doing it she would take me to the refrigerator and threaten to put hot sauce on it. I don't know why but this freaked me out so I stopped. My Mother was a wonderful person and never threatened me with anything but this and I still remember it. I am thankful for her because I've never had any dental issues because of it.

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E.P.

answers from Springfield on

when you find out PLEASE let me know too- My daughter is 10yrs old AND STILL DOES IT!!!

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

i agree with jillian - i have a 16 month old son who sucks his thumb, and both myself and my brother did when we were little. both of us stopped eventually, once we started school and learned when it was acceptable and not...then eventually stopped completely. i was so happy when my son started sucking his thumb at about 6 weeks old...he started immediately sleeping through the night, and has never looked back. it's a wonderful thing for a child to be able to soothe him/herself. i don't see a thing in the world wrong with it. i've only heard of it interfering with school and social situations in extreme cases, when the child has been through some kind of trauma. i'm sure it'll be fine.

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C.E.

answers from Kansas City on

I'm in the same situation with my son who turns 4 in May. From what I've read, trying to force them to stop will only increase their determination to continue sucking. The reality is, you can't make them stop, they need to grow out of it. I've started giving my son gum to chew when he's in the car or watching tv. This prevents him from sucking during those times. I had one ped. dentist tell me that he needs to stop now or he'll want to put in an appliance that prevents him from creating suction. I spoke with several other ped. dental professionals and they agreed that this is way too early for an intervention of that degree. Many kids outgrow it once they start preschool or kindergarten. Another thing I read encouraged parents to determine the source of the sucking. Why are they doing it? My son is nervous and gets bored easily. So I try to be aware and help him deal with anxiety and keep him busy. Lots of affection and reassurance can help too. Good luck to you!

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D.D.

answers from St. Louis on

Well....I sucked my thumb even up until I was 11 years old. I never did it in public, but it was my form of comfort when I was alone. I grew up in a happy household, so it had nothing to do with any major psychosomatic stress; just my MO (mode of operation). I consider myself to be a fairly well-adjusted person. My parents never made it a big deal, for which i am very thankful. My daughter sucked her thumb up until she was 6 or 7. I never made it a big deal with her either. I gently encouraged her to refrain from sucking her thumb during normal daily activities; but, when she was curled up in bed, or watching a show, or listening to a story I was reading it was a natural thing for her to do. She is now 9 and rarely sucks her thumb.

For me I have too many other battle fronts with raising children, so I decided to not make this one. Children need a way to comfort themselves and most adults that I know don't look at thumb sucking as an abnormal way of giving self comfort.

Having said that....if thumb sucking gets in the way of you being able to communicate with her then it could be beneficial and wise to put some boundaries on when she can suck her thumb.

Good Luck! ---and most of all, know your child and it will all work out.

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A.P.

answers from Lawton on

My oldest son sucked his thumb. He even sucked his thumb while still in the womb. I asked his doctor when he was a toddler about the damage to his teeth. He told me as long as it was his thumb and not his fingers pushing out his front teeth not to worry. He said he would quit on HIS time. Even if it meant starting school and being embarrassed about sucking callouses on his thumb. He quit right before he started school on his own. He too sucked when he was tired, in trouble or sad. He is 20 and has never needed braces, beautiful teeth. His 18 yr old brother on the other hand never sucked his thumb or pacifier and had to have braces.

Hope this helps.

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A.C.

answers from Wichita on

I've found the best way to deal with this is to ignore it, maybe sneak in a little distraction, but the more you rag on her about it the worse it will get. Trust me I still suck my thumb to go to sleep or when I'm sick or in pain (I sucked while in labor HAHA) my parents, grandparents even friends in middle/high school teased me tried different things and it didn't work. And guess what none of my kids regularly have and when I do see them, I don't say anything.

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J.S.

answers from Columbia on

My daughter sucked her thumb, although mostly at bedtime, until she was 11 years old. I tried bribing her, hot spices on her thumb and many conversations intended to convince her to stop. Finally, I got assistance from a friend who is a professional counselor and was also studying to be a Hypnotist. She worked with her using counseling and hypnotist techniques. After two sessions her habit was gone and I am happy to say she is now 15 and has been thumb-sucking-free for 4 years! Good luck! This is a tough one.

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