Thinking of Home Schooling - Toms River,NJ

Updated on October 23, 2011
M.T. asks from Eatontown, NJ
10 answers

I never thought I would ask this but what are other mothers opinions on home schooling? I know the social aspect would be hard but I think I can accomplish that by sending my daughters to after school programs. My daughters are only 2 1/2 and 4 months old but I recently have been thinking about home schooling. I have worked with school aged kids for years and am now a stay at home mom. I see the damage and hurt that even grade school kids cause each other and I worry about the school systems now a days. I feel like with all the budget cuts and larger classes that my child will not get the education that I think she needs. I also have had bad experiences with teachers and principles in schools with there tactics on how to control children now a days. School and kids are not the way they used to be when I went to school. I kind of think that I can give them a better education than a public school (can't afford a private school) I am the last person that would shelter their kid and I know that are some of the reasons that parents home school but I am more concerned about their education. My oldest daughter is extrmely smart but sometimes when she is around other kids her age she tends to not use her advanced skills and I am afraid that she might do the samething when she starts school. If I did decide to home school I want to make sure that it is to the states standard and that they don't fall behind. Does anyone know how I can find out what those standards might be or where I can find materials. I really think that I can do it and best prepare my children for the future.

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So What Happened?

thank you all so much for the resources. I looked at a couple of them and I am getting a little overwhelmed. I don't want to read pages and pages about why you should homeschool and the benifits and all the othe mumbo jumbo, I really just want the facts and where I can get curriculum. Maybe even a sample schudule. I have so many ideas running around in my head of what I want to do but I don't have any idea of how or when to implement them. I also am havinf a hard time finding a local support group. I knw that I still have time to look into things so I will keep looking. I also mentioned it to my mother-in-law and she wouldn't even let me finish my sentance before telling me what a horrible idea it was. WHen I said something to my husband he didn't say anything which usually means that he does not like the idea and is hoping that I willdrop it without him saying anything. I really want to try and I know that I can always put my kids in school if it doesn't work out. THanks again

More Answers



answers from Los Angeles on

People always ask me, "What about the socialization?"

My reponse is, "You say that like it's a good thing. Have you seen how kids treat each other and how disrespectful they are to adults?"

We have very intelligent children and my almost 9 year old is scary smart. We pulled him from school after kindergarten and he loves it. We belong to 2 homeschool groups, so that we get interaction with a myriad of different people and choose who we hang with, rather than being forced to hang with the same people all of the time.

I run a business that requires me to be there and my husband runs it with me, so we work 4 half days and I do most of the homeschooling. This year, my 8 year old is in 5th grade (only because we slowed him down a bit, in case he ever wants to go back to school, I don't know about him and older, more forward girls.) He is taking a writing class from an amazing writer, who homeschooled her own 4 boys, and he loves it.

We have park days with the other kids 3 days each month, assemblies, mom's night out, field trips (which we did one yesterday that I think my husband and I got more out of than the kids did - things I didn't learn in history class, but should have!), specific activities for the high schoolers, etc.

No longer are the years of Homeschoolers who were rare and hid from society. We now have about 2 million people who are homeschooled in the US alone....and we are socialized, in a good way. LOL

More and more people are seeing how brainwashed we have been, thinking that teachers are the only ones who can educate our children. Who can teach your child better than you? You know how they learn and EVERY moment is a teachable moment that we seize.

Home Learning Year by Year helps you figure things out, but we download the state's (pathetically low) education standards each year from the state's government website and just make sure we hit all of their points....well, most of them. Our 1st grade son was not interested in dancing with ribbons, so we skipped that part. LOL

You will be shocked how easy it is to educate your child AND how much more time you have with them. No PTA junk, no massive amounts of fundraising flyers, no excessive busy work called homework, no parent teacher meetings, no mandatory classroom volunterring, etc. Oh yeah, and no school traffic!

What did it for me was reading research about compulsory school and the average child gets 2 hours and 13 minutes of instruction time each day! What do they do all day? Why are they coming home with 3 hours of homework? I don't want to fight over homework, when I could be playing and bonding with my child.

Definitely get a membership to the For updates on laws, but more importantly, they are your private attorneys if anything homeschool related comes up.

Good luck and enjoy your kids!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Los Angeles on

We have homeschooled for about two years now and we love it. My best advice to you would be to find a local homeschooling support group and start talking to other parents who are already homeschooling (I did a Google search to find ours). They are the best people who can give you advice, because they are in the same state that you are and can advise you on your state's requirements; and they can share their experiences with you. Once you see how other people homeschool their kids, and you learn about their experiences, it becomes much easier to see how it can be a great decision for you and your family.

You can do a Google search for your state's legal requirements for homeschooling, and you can probably find your state's curriculum standards that way as well. There is also a great book series called "What Your Kindergartner [First Grader, etc.] Needs to Know" by E. D. Hirsch; there is one book for every grade and is a very helpful resource. You can find many free materials online, and you can design your own curriculum without spending a lot of money by utilizing the local library and deciding on your own what materials to use. Or if you choose to use an online school or homeschooling program, there are those out there as well. You have many options when homeschooling.

These are a few books that really helped me in our decision to homeschool that I recommend to you (though there are many out there; I just went to the library and checked out every book they had, and these were my favorites):

The Well-Adjusted Child: The Social Benefits of Homeschooling by Rachel Gathercole

Homeschooling: Take a Deep Breath-You Can Do This! By Terri Lynn Bittner

The Everything Homeschooling Book by Sherri Linsenbach

Homeschool Your Child for Free! (2009 version) by LauraMaery Gold and Joan Zielinski

There are SO MANY reasons we decided to homeschool and why we love it; but since this is pretty long already, I won't list them all here. But if you have any more questions feel free to send me a private message; I know it can be a nerve-wracking decision and I'm willing to answer any other questions you may have. Good luck with your decision!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

There are many reasons to homeschool and I don't think any reason is "wrong." You're already your child's first and best teacher so continuing on is a great idea!

We've been homeschooling for 3 years and my daughter is well-rounded both socially and academically. You go to school to LEARN, not to socialize. I always smile at the socialization argument because there are MANY children in public and private school that cannot handle social situations and they do not have many friends. If school was meant for socialization, then all of those kids should be good at it by High School!

HSLDA should be able to help you with your state standards. Just be prepared for a wonderful and strange journey! And remember that you are learning too, and it's okay to switch curriculums or try new things when what you are doing doesn't work. We've switched methods, curriculums, schedules and many other things until we found what works for us. It's still an evolving process.

A support group for us was key! It helped get me through when our families thought we were crazy and when people look at us like we are totally messing up our kid! We just had a Halloween party in our homeschool group and my daughter had a wonderful time and I enjoyed talking with all the moms.

You absolutely CAN do it! Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Dayton on

There are plenty of homeschooling moms here.
I started homeschooling my DD this year (kindergarten).
And I think, overall, it has been a good decision.
I have a child that would thrive on the social aspect (maybe too much) of school, but get completely lost academically.
Just yesterday she was really struggling w/ math. (I am kinda pushing her beyond where our curriculum is-but she is ready for it.)
There is no way a teacher could have sat and explained it till she got it like we did.
If you are using a curriculum I don't know how you could get behind state standards.
I am using one that is used in many private Christian schools (A Beka).

Here is the official homeschool site w/ legal info:

I just got this catalog in the mail and I was really intrigued by their classroom sets they put together (though more $ than what I am using):


2 moms found this helpful


answers from Lakeland on

I don't home school, but I know lots of moms that do. I think you have to do what’s best for your family. There are so many groups out there so your kids can be social. I wanted to home school, but my hubby was against it. We opted for private school and so far it is working well for us.
I would start now looking for groups around you. They will usually let newcomers in to get to know everyone. Even with younger children. You can learn how homeschooling works in your state (laws, etc) and make new friends.
Check out the K-12 program and Connections Academy. These are home schooling programs through the public school system. They will give you the supplies you need.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

I'm another future home schooling mom (my kids are 3.5 and almost 2). I'm doing it for lots of reasons, but I am amazed at how elaborate the resources are becoming. There are groups everywhere, and many YMCAs even offer HS gym.

I'm not doing it to shelter my kids. In fact, I think schools shelter kids! The world should be their curriculum, not some book!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Atlanta on

I have mixed feelings about it. I do not homeschool, but I have worked for an online curriculum company that many homeschoolers use, and it's far better than a lot of the curriculum used in our public schools. I used to teach on the secondary level, and I would certainly homeschool my kids before I would send them to a school like one where I taught if I couldn't afford private school. I think if you do it "right" then it can be okay. If you live in a place where there are homeschooling groups and clubs and kids have many opportunities to interact socially, have dances, etc., and if you encourage them to take part in other extracurricular activities, then there's no reason that they shouldn't be well-rounded individuals when they're done.

If you have legitimate reasons for homeschooling and not (as some I know) only do it because your child refuses to learn how to get along with anyone else or you want to deprive them of a real education or actually maturing and growing up -then I have major issues with it. I don't think it would ever fit into our lives, but I do know some people who I don't blame for doing it at all, and if I was in a position where I had to live in a certain area and couldn't afford a private school, then I would do it.



answers from Washington DC on

Start with
google some homeschooling forums,,
Find the homeschooling groups in your area
Just type in Homeschooling co-ops or groups in Toms RIver, NJ
Check out your library for homeschooling books and read now, then when you are ready to start actual book learning you have an idea how you want to do it.

Socialization, ha. My kids are very socialized, too much so sometimes. THey are in swimming, fencing, art class, band, scouts, youth group

Good luck, I homeschool my 5th adn 8th graders.



answers from New York on

Have you looked in to the k-12 internet school? Its kind of like home school, only you use the school systems curriculum to guide you a long.


answers from New York on

Your local public school should have it's curriuclum and standards posted, check out their website

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