Tell Me I'm Not the Only One, Kid Won't Sit Still

Updated on April 13, 2007
N.H. asks from Kaneohe, HI
6 answers

I hate feeling like I have the only kid who won't sit still. I went to a work Easter Egg hunt today and I was busy chasing my kid everywhere (or just following to make sure he was safe) while everyone else's kids basically sat and waited or stayed close to their parents. My son got mad at me when he had to share the Easter Bunny with everyone else. Here I sit in the corner with my kid screaming until he could get himself together to move on. So, my son is just always on the move. He will just run and not stop, which can be scary. We have worked on stopping and it just doesn't take. For a while, I could play on separation anxiety and turn my back and say "bye" and he'd come running back to me.

So, if that's not enough, why is it that I can get him to learn and be good about certain things and then all of a sudden I'm re-correcting him over and over again. At what point does self-discipline start kicking in?! Some people are making me feel like his behavior is not normal, but I can't imagine it not being normal.

I guess I'm looking for some encouragement. I know it takes consistency, and that's hard when doing the single-parent thing. I truly give my heart to single moms!!

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L.D.

answers from Modesto on

I know exactly how you are feeling. When my son hit two I thought I was the only one who had a kid that could not listen, could not sit still (I mean he couldn't even sit through a whole cartoon). I would see my friends kids sit quietly and watch teletubbies while my son ran circles around them. He has always been like this and when he would go with family I was always nervous that they wouldn't watch him close enough and he would get hurt, I mean he would run full force anywhere including the street after whatever he wanted and people didn't understand it. All I can say is you probably have the makings of one smart little boy. My son is 8 years old now and while he is still very very active he is in a special program AT and G it stands for Acidemically Gifted and Talented. He is a sharp kid and he did all the things you are describing that your son does. He was so all over the place that I didn't know how he was ever going to sit still when he started school and I actually thought there maybe something wrong with him. I would try the seperation thing too and my son could care less if I was going to leave him somewhere. I think your son is completly normal and everything you are doing will work in the end. Like I said my son is eight now and he is the most loving, caring and for the most part well mannered kid out of all three of mine. I think a child who doesn't sit still is probably the best kind there is, his mind is always going as well as his little body and I bet you have a pretty great little man in the making!

1 mom found this helpful
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R.

answers from Las Vegas on

N.,
Nothing makes me madder than judgmental mothers. My son can be the same way. However, I am supported by friends who all have one child in their family that is head strong and very active. My son is about to be 3 and his behavior has gotten better, but we never know when that tantrum will come. What makes it hard is that his sister is nothing like that. Just keep disciplining him when he needs it, and loving him when he needs that. My husband and I pray for him and ourselves, to know how to interact with his personality. Maybe he needs an outlet where he is involved in an activity? It seems to help my son. Don't fret, we all get those looks and glares, but they don't know my son, and his wonderful heart, and great sense of humor. There are wonderful things about your son, give those things the attention. I wish you the best, I know the heartache you are feeling!
Bec

1 mom found this helpful
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M.J.

answers from Los Angeles on

Dude...he's 2. "Other People" need to chill out.

My daughter is just about to turn two and she is always on the move. I love it. I would much rather have an adventurous munchkin than a clingy Mama's girl.

I think it's all a matter of persepective. Kids are kids. They are free to express themselves without any hinderance from society, from politically correctness, from rules, from what is "frowned upon", and from condeming opinionated "other people." Wouldn't you love to be that carefree? To do and express yourself any way you felt like without having your peace in someone else's head.

I just went to church on Easter. The sanctuary was packed so we went to the clubhouse...an overflow area with seating and a projection big screen tv and a side room with couches for families with small children. Everyone held on to their kids making them sit still, hushing and shushing while I let my daughter make laps around the pool tables. I got frowns, glances, and when I would smile and make eye contact, they would look away. "Isn't this the room for small kids?, I thought to myself." Each one of these people had an opportunity to use the childcare but chose to keep their kids in service with them so when I show up and my excitable toddler starts trotting around, they look at me like I'm letting my kid get out of control. Bah, I say. We ended up leaving the room and going outside where we couldn't hear the message so we just left.

It's silly but think of it this way. Asking and expecting a kid to sit still (especially when there is eggs and the famous Easter Bunny present) is like asking an adult to run wild, carefree and then throwing a fit in the corner when he/she can't have their way. It's not in our nature to ignore those social cues and it's not in their nature to pay attention to them. If he's getting all up in someones space, that's when you should step in but other than that, people need to lighten up and let their kids be kids...while they are still kids.

PS...I to am not sure we will have another child due to health issues so I can understand that and the pressures that come with the decision. God Bless your husband for serving...and thank you.

M.

1 mom found this helpful
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E.D.

answers from Las Vegas on

I didnt know they did stay still! Just kidding I know what you mean I have an active 3yr old and his 1yr old sister more mellow but she likes to join in the fun alot more now that she is mobile! Anyone that makes others feel bad about the fact that a child is just a child will have alot of problems with their own children at some point. Children need the freedom to play and have fun, although boundaries and limits should be set! I do have help from my husband when he is not working but I have been alone chase two at the same time! crazy! But like you said persistance and patience, at the same time a little freedom to be a kid and have fun! Hang in there and pray for alot more patience!Take Care and God Bless!

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S.S.

answers from Honolulu on

You are not the only one! When my son was almost 2, I noticed his behavior was much more extreme than the average child his age, so I took him to the doctors, and from there it was therapist after therapist and doctor after doctor- I was told he had ADHD, he was given 3 different medications including Ritalin, and after I saw how he changed from a spirited, animated boy, to a barely coherant zombie- I finally said ENOUGH! Now hes 4 1/2 and yes, he is still super high-energy, and he still has behavior issues, such as screaming and throwing extreme tantrums, but its gotten much better since hes been in school. If there are any early-intervention services in your area, like Sultan Easter Seals- they have a program for kids up to 3 years of age. My son did it, he enjoyed it, and it made a big difference. Lots of patience and understanding as to why his behavior turns on and off like that helps- for my son, speech was an issue, and the fact that he became easily frustrated when he couldnt communicate his wants or needs clearly would set him off. I know its really tiring, but in the big picture, just remember that its all worth it. I hope this helps even a little bit, because you are not alone!

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S.T.

answers from Sacramento on

My kid has adhd but, she is going on 7 years old. So at the age of 2 that a bit different. Keep an eye on it & check with your dr for signs of add or adhd.

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