I'm just asking out of curiosity. Our cheerleading squad qualified for the National Cheerleading Competition in Orlando, Florida Disney World. This is the big competition that is televised on ESPN and in the cheerleading world it's a big deal to go.
The parents of our girls were divided, some of them really wanted to fundraise and go and the others were very against it. (The girls on our team are 10-11 years old).
One of the reasons cited for not going is some of the parents said they could not bring one of their children to Disney World and not their brothers or sisters.
Now, this cheerleading competition does include passes to Disney World (it's part of the experience) and families are invited to buy packages and stay in the Disney hotel with the cheerleaders and enjoy Disney. However, Disney is expensive no matter how you look at it. If we were to fundraise we'd fundraise for the GIRLS on the team and maybe one parent. That's probably about all we could manage, I don't see how we could fundraise for ENTIRE families to go, especially since some families are big and some are small.
It would be the responsibility of the individual families to raise money for themselves if they wanted the rest of their family to go. They don't want to do that, so of course we can't go.
I know that every year lots of teams travel down to Disney for this competition. When I went my brother did not go. None of my family went either, but then again I was in High School so I was older.
Would you keep one of your children from this great experience because you couldn't afford for all your children to go? It's first and foremost the biggest National Cheerleading competition, nationally televised, and the winners can qualify for Worlds (which includes cheer squads from all over the world) Why or why not? I'm asking because I want to know if this is a common opinion. It's definitely something I'm going to have to deal with since many of our girls want to aim for this competition next year or the year after.
Ive never heard of including family member costs in a fundraiser. usually its just the team and a few of the chaperones. I myself would never keep my child home just because the rest of the siblings couldnt go, they will have a chance to do their own thing later in school life.
I would send one girl to the competition. The main experience is the competition. I would focus on that when talking with my other children. I see this as an experience too important to miss.
I would NEVER hold my daughter back from something she was good at just because the entire family couldn't go. I know there are some families who view the "family" unit as more important than any individual and they will probably disagree with me. I would say that other child will have experiences of their own that the older one won't be a part of .... and then there will be times for family vacation. To hold a child back from a competition they earned would hurt the team and cause resentment in the cheerleader. If you have that perspective I would encourage them to not put their daughter in a sport that is competitive and requires that kind of time and money comittment.
I would encourage your team members families to view the competition as an honor for the team - not as a family vacation. I would also maybe try to solicit extra adults in case there is a family where the parent can't go if they have to stay home with the other kids.
I would take the child that won and one parent if that was all I could afford.
I would take the one child. Although it would be ideal to take the whole family, it is such a wonderful opportunity for the child who gets to go. Also, I don't think it is necessary to make sure everything is fair and even for all your children. Everyone's different and each child will have different opportunities and interests to support.
ok These kids have earned this trip , not their siblings. If the parents want everyone to go they need to take a family vacation, not prevent these girls from a great opportunity .
That just ridiculous. Not everything has to be "fair" . This attitude is a product of our society.
You don't hold one child back because it might not be fair to the other children.
No I would fundraise for one child +one parent. This sounds soooo special I can't understand why people would disagree. People should raise their kids to be supportive of their siblings and to realize this is something really special. It teaches kids to care, be respectful and to support there families in there great achievements. JMHO :-)
Do the other children have the opportunity to participate in something so grand?? Are their activities or sports held in such high regard?
Fund raising for an entire family seems strange.
Wow, that's a tough one! I can see both sides of it.
I've actually watched that event on tv.
I like the option of the group paying for the team and chaperones, but having it open enough for family to come also. If I couldn't raise enough money to take my other child, I would feel bad, but at the same time the only reason my one child would be going was because she was part of a team.
My brother was able to travel to Scotland with the HS for a music festival. My sister has always wanted to visit Scotland. If she could raise the money on her own, they would let her travel with the group, but it was on her to raise the money, just as my brother had to raise his own portion. My brother was able to raise his amount, my sister was not. She did NOT visit Scotland.
The only thing with family coming along also will be the rooms. Would you all stay at a Value Resort? The # of rooms needed would differ drastically. The number of chaperones needed would change drastically.
Say that Amy has one girl on the team, but three kids in the family. If just she and the cheerleader attend, they can share a room with another mom and daughter. If all three girls attend, Amy would want to share a room with all three which means you would need another room for the mom and daughter that now can't share.
One thing to do would be to determine the maximum number of people that WOULD attend if they could. Contact Disney for a group price and figure out a base price per-person. At 10-11y old, if you did the dinning plan, the girls would be considered 'adults'. You could also get a group price per-person for if JUST the team and chaperones went. You would need a minimum of 1 parent to 3 girls. Its also possible that Disney would give one price for the team and chaperones and another for regular family. Once you have those #s, the parents can decide how to go forward. It would have to be a binding contract which means no one family backing out except for a few lean circumstances.
All money raised during the fundraiser if needed, should be deamed team money and in a team account. Not in any one parent's account. Once money is raised/turned in, if the girl cannot attend, the money she donated stays with the team.
What about travleing there? Would you fly? Charter bus? Parents caravan?
If you rent a charter bus, I believe you would be expected to cover the room expense for the driver.
Good luck, I hope they get to go.
I understand that some families just can't afford to take the whole family, I do. But to limit the whole team because these winners brother or sister can't go for free is sad. Why in the world would any of these girls even try to be a winner ever again.
A friend of mine just got to go to Disney for a pageant. She won for Oklahoma. They only did one parent and the girl. The mom and dad talked and decided to make a family trip out of it. They figured with the pass for the girl and the mom that they would never be able to afford this kind of trip for so little ever again. So they took both kids and only paid a few hundred dollars for the flight, hotel, and then the admittance to the park. They got the family trip without paying out the nose for it. Really it was like half the normal price.
He is a Chiropractor and she is his office manager so they aren't super well off but do okay. They were willing to sacrifice something to support their daughter without slighting their son.
If it had been me I would have had to say that I would keep the boy home and take the girl. This team won this award and invitation to compete on TV and to see if they could win a higher title.
Parents who put their kids in cheer know in advance they will have to travel to competitions and to sacrifice a lot. They knew going in they would have situations like this.
On Thanksgiving, my husbands cousin was attending with 3 of her 4 kids. The oldest girl was at Disney for a soccer tournament. Her family choose to send her and one parent, and it was over a major family holiday.
I think you are in the right... fundraise for the participating child and one parent.
Everything else is up to the family's.
J.
I see everyday we go on playdates and its you need both kids there or the kid can't go. Some parents feel it has to be all or nothing. To each there own we usually do not mind additons to play dates but sometimes I see the siblings do. I suppose its the same thing for Disney. The right way to do it is one parent and the child who won it. That child deserves that reward and should not be told no because everyone cant go. Single mom might have an issue because maybe she can barely afford the cheer never mind a trip to Disney. I would not let my daughter go without either myself or her dad. But as a cheer squad I'd fundraise for the child and one parent. I'd though get a count ahead of time who can go. When you move someone out of spot in competitve cheer sometimes they have to do the who routine different.
I say fundraise for the money for the child and a parent. Disney does not have to cost 10,000 for a family. We are a family of five, stayed for a week at the Bay Lake Towers (Deluxe One bedroom Villas), with the deluxe dining plan, and it was about 5500 the first week of May and we felt like we really went all out. There are hundreds of resources on how to do disney on a budget and frankly, if only one child gets to go, its a good lesson for the others about working hard for something really special. I say go....good luck! I don't think its fair to hold one child back because of the others.
I have to agree with Beth, not everything in life is fair and kids need to learn this. My sister got to do things simular to this when we were kids and I didn't. The kids will find out when they are adults that life is not fair and then they will be in shock and unable to cope.
I think the cheer squad should go (they are the ones that earned it) and if some families can go too then so be it. Why should the kids that worked so hard for it be told no. That is not fair.
We've had this scenario come up when I/we were children with various sports and school events. I never went to Boston, NY, Vegas, DC, Dublin (places some of my sibs went) and they never went to some of the places I went.
Honestly... trips spur other trips. Seeing one of my brothers or sisters win a trip with hard work (and vice versa)... really is a huge motivator.
Now... we DID go as a family on a couple trips. Most went as a family when it was somewhere exciting... but my dad was Navy. Meaning not home much. It's IMPOSSIBLE (according to my mum) to be a sport parent AND an 'other kids' parent. There are so many rehersals/practices, team events, bed checks, team meals, etc... that there reeeeally needs to be 2 adults if more than the competing child comes. One to take the other kids out for fun, and one to stay with the competitor and the team. Rarely the twain will meet. Leads to hurt feelings (in our family at least) FAR more than sitting out a trip. Just because everyone is split up doing different things, it causes problems. Even during 'free' time, the competitor does NOT want to be with their sibs... they want to be with the team. So even when the twain DO meet problems ensue. Even when my dad was home, it was USUALLY just one of us and our mum. Or later (highschool) JUST US (no mum... in between ages 12-14 parents stop coming with and it's just the team and 2-3 chaperones).
I feel for you having to handle this! I don't know these cheerleaders' ages, but heck, I would limit it even more -- fundraising to cover ONLY the cheerleaders themselves, the coaches, and a certain limited number of adult chaperones (not one parent for each and every child). You'd probably have disputes, though, over who would get to chaperone -- at least it sounds like you would, since these parents seem way too sensitive about "everyone should get to go"! Beyond the limited number of chaperones (say, one for every X girls), parents can pay entirely for themselves, but I would not fundraise to provide a parent for every kid who goes!
They are basically downgrading their daughters' achievements in reaching this level if they insist that their daughters who earned this honor can't go unless all their siblings go too. That's simply ridiculous and punishes the girls for being successful -- you did well enough to get this far but now you can't go, because you have siblings! That sends a horrible message.
You mentioned that your girls will want to go on to competitions as they get older. Use the time to talk with other cheer coaches, dance teachers, etc. about what they and their studios/programs do. You may find some models for how to handle this in the future. But these parents really have to get over the "everyone must do everything" mentality. Sometimes a kid gets to do something other kids don't -- welcome to life!
I used to cheer and you're right this is a huge competiton and such a huge deal. As I see it you are going for the competition not for the disney experience and that's just a perk of the competition. The squad is going to be so busy with the competition aspect is it really worth it to bring the entire family unless you plan to stay longer right? If people want to bring their entire families then that's up to them and they should bear the costs. The fundraising should be for the squad members and chaparones in my opinion. If it were my little girl on the squad then it would probably be just me and her and everyone else in the family woulde stay home. We would plan a disney vacation for some other time. I went to London with UCA and it was such an amazing experience. I hope your daughter has fun and good luck!
Like the previous poster we have had this come up several times in our children s school years. My oldest son sang at Disney World when he was a junior in high school. we took the whole family all 5 of the kids and my husband and self. at a cost of close to $10,000. the next year son number two had his Disney trip. my husband went as chaperon and the rest of us stayed home. This past year son number 3 sang at Mall of America in March. I went as chaperon the rest stayed home. In June Son number one was a senior at Carthage college and they sang at Carnegie hall in New York and hubby and I went. this spring son #3 is having his trip to Disney. At this point I am not sure if any of us are going lol. But next year he will be singing at Carnegie hall and I think the older kids will be taking their vacations from work and getting a hotel for a night or two to go and see it. hubby and I will for sure be going. Would we hold a kid back because they can't all go? no but would we send them alone with just the coaches and other chaperon's. yes.
