Suggestions for 2 1/2 Yr Old Having Surgery with Bad Seperation Anxiety.

Updated on August 11, 2009
A.L. asks from Blue Earth, MN
15 answers

My spirited 2 1/2 yr old is having her tonsils taken out in a few weeks and I am a bit worried. She has a bad case of seperation anxiety and am afraid this is only going to make things worse. She has already had her adnoids removed and eartubes put in at 14 months but is starting to snore really badly and tosses and turns all night. Is their anyone that has had this procedure done that has had a good affect on their childs sleeping habits and does anyone have suggestions for her seperation anxiety.

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S.K.

answers from Omaha on

I'm thinking you can cuddle in the bed with her until she is medicated (knocked out) and then you can be there when she wakes up!

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A.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son had his tonsils and adnoids out last year. I was able to stay with him till he went under. I just held him on my lap while the put the mask on and it went real smooth. That part was not the hard part. It is very painful after. I am still happy I did it but it was the hardest week for him and me and he was in alot of pain. He needed to take the pain meds but half the time would have a knock down drag out fight with me. Anyways not your question. As far as the seperation anxiety goes as long as you ask to hold her while she is going under it will be fine and she wont be scared with you there but make sure you insist on being in the room holding her.
A.

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L.H.

answers from Milwaukee on

If she stays in the hospital you can stay with her.

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S.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Definitely have someone (you or Dad) there when she goes under and comes out. Also, she is old enough to benefit from the kids' orientation service offered by most hospitals. It really puts their minds at ease about what to expect, and may actually give her some positives to look forward to. Good luck!

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C.F.

answers from Milwaukee on

With my daughter I was able to sleep at the hospital over nite with her. She was 2 at the time. She had her tonsils out because she was constantly sick and would spike these horrible fevers and then go in to seizures. She never had another episode once the tonsils were out. She was a snorer before the procedure and didn't anymore after. Kids at that age are more resilient than you would think. Once they get to the surgery the people are really good about calming them down. I was right there when she came out of surgery and was able to hold her. This was at Childrens' Hospital Milwaukee.

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R.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Explain to the nurses that you need to be there and hold her while she is being put under and when she's waking up. That might do the trick....
My granddaughter had her tonsils and adenoids removed last year because she was snoring and not sleeping well. As it turns out she really didn't need her adenoids removed (they took them anyway) but her tonsils where HUGE. Since her surgery she hasn't made a peep while she sleeps and is waking up much happier. Now her baby sister is starting to snore......Good luck to all of you...
Renee

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A.L.

answers from Lincoln on

My then just-turned-3 yr old had his tonsils/adnoids taken out about a yr & an half ago and everything went very smoothly. He snored terribly, woke up several times a nite because of it -- and after surgery it was gone immediately! He also went through a lot of separation anxiety. At the surgical center/hospital we were at, they were great. The anthesiologist (sp?) came to our room introduced herself and read him a book!! Then gave him something to relax him while were there. So, when they were ready to take him to surgery he was totally loopey and could have cared less. A little strange and creepy to see your child this way, but much better than have him screaming!! And, then they brought him back to the room afterwards so we were there when he woke up. Just ask your Dr. about the protocol for their procedure, and tell him/her your concerns and desires. I would guess if they are used to working with children they make accomodations. Good luck! By the way, recovery for us was a breeze too!! Here's wishing the same for you!

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N.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I agree with the others--make sure they let you be with her going under and coming out. Sometimes as parents we really have to 'go to bat' for our kids and their needs, so don't be afraid to be assertive with the hospital. Good luck!

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My 3 1/2 year old just has his tonsils/adenoids out this summer, and he did great! He also has some separation anxiety, so I was worried how he would handle it. Our surgery was at Children's Hospital in Minneapolis, and they were wonderful. I would suggest you check to see if there is any type of orientation you can attend for young kids - we did the orientation the night before the surgery and I think it really helped prepare him (and us!) for what would all happen the next morning. They got to play with surgical scrubs, stethoscopes, and even took us into the room with the sparkly lights. It really helped set the tone for the next day.

My husband and I both got to be with him when he was put under and they would allow us into recovery if he needed us. He didn't need us - had his favorite blankie with him the whole time. He did so well we even got to go home that night, as we were scheduled to spend the night in the short-stay unit.
I would also recommend reading books about getting your tonsils out - Curious George Goes To The Hospital is a good one too - anything to help prepare them for the procedure.

The surgery helped our son immensely - he is no longer snoring and his color looks better overall. The surgeon told us his tonsils were very enlarged, and confirmed once again after he was out of surgery.
Best of luck!

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P.A.

answers from Duluth on

My now 4 yr old had her tonsils and adnoids removed when she was 3 yrs. Before the surgery her tonsils were swollen so bad they were pretty much touching in the middle. She snored loudly and would have to be repositioned throughout the night to help her breath better. After the surgery, her breathing became quiet at night and I worry less about her sleep apnea. Now, the only time her breathing is loud at night is when she is having asthma attacks.
Most hospitals will keep the parents with the child until it is time for them to have the anethesia and try to get the parent with the child in the recovery room as soon as possible. I have never regretted putting my daughters (the oldest had the same surgery a month later) through that surgery. It was worth the pain they went through while their throats healed. I hope the surgery goes well for your daughter. Definitely, take her favorite stuffed animal and blanket with you to the hospital and they should let her have them until the anethesia has her asleep.

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi A.

I agree with the other responses. Went through the same thing with my special ed child for some dental reasons over 10 years ago. The hospital was fine with us staying with him when he was put under. The very heated disagreement came when it was time to wake up. He had never been in the hospital before and we were very concerned that he would lose it when he woke up and found no familiar faces. After about 45 minutes of debate, we were allowed to be there when he woke up. I put my foot down, pretty much through the floor, and demanded that one of us be in the room. We were told "This was just not done." We did not care. I will say that the pediatric dentist was ok with it. It was the anastetic dr who had a problem. She needs to know you are there with her. Sounds like you are a wonderful caring mom. Go with your heart. Stick to your instincts.
Love to hear how it all turns out.
J.

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R.G.

answers from Milwaukee on

Hello! My daughter had her tonsils & adenoids out this past December when she was 2 1/2 at Children's Hospital in Milwaukee and it wasn't a problem. My husband & I were with her until she was put under and they told me part of the anethesia included something so that she wouldn't remember anything. We were there when she woke up and that part was fine. Recovery is a whole other story - gear yourself up for a full two weeks of 'fun'. :) But the end result is SO worth it - my daughter is sleeping so much better and no longer snores like a sailor!! Good luck, she'll do fine!

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C.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

My 3 yo with separation anxiety has his adenoids out recently. Thankfully it was done at Children's in Mpls...I was allowed to hold him as he was "put under" and to be there when he woke up. I'd ask if there's anyway that could be done for you and your little girl. Explain the severity of her anxiety to them. Good luck to you!!!

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S.K.

answers from Omaha on

My daughters had their tonsils and adnoids out and tube put in at a young age too. Our church at the time had a program that whenever a child was having surgery or something where they couldn't be with their parents, they would give them a stuffed lamb. It was the Lamb of God. God is always with you, no matter what. It was great. I stayed in the room until they were both totally out. They allowed them to have the stuffed animal and of course once they were asleep they took it from them, but when they woke up the lamb was right there beside them. I don't know if you are a religous person or not, but it was great letting them have something to hang on to and it also let them know God was with them and they weren't alone. It worked great for my kids.

Good Luck

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E.B.

answers from Duluth on

I would think it would almost be standard procedure for a parent to be there as a child is put under and as a child comes out of anesthetic. Coming out is extremely disorienting; I even got a little freaked as an adult--so I'd think it would be easier on them to have mom or dad there.

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