My 2yo son is getting his 2year molars in (he's 26 months old) and Im not sure if it's related to the problem we're having... I'm looking for feedback about this...
He's suddenly very sad at bathtime, cries, stands and wants me to get him out quickly. He's not a big talker yet, he signs and communicates his needs very well... he keeps saying out out out and no no no! He's not had any bad experiences in the bath... and actually asks to go take one. It's when we actually get him in the tub, he screams! I'm so sad for him!!! Any ideas, advice?
I'm a sahm/wfhm - so Im with him at all times!
Thanks for all of the quick responses, I read your advice and ideas and also decided to call the ped., just to be sure of myself...
To answer some of your questions, yes, I'm the only person to bathe him, I'm here with him always, no one else has touched him; my husband doesn't do the bathtime, I do. I'm very fortuate to be a stay at home mom who is 100% hands on! I work from home too. Nothing obvious has happened to frighten him in the bath, no falls, no hot water scares, and I don't let the drain out when he's in the tub at all - he sits in the little Munchkin ducky tub so he doesn't know what the drain is!! (I remember that fear myself, as a child, so I've picked my battle on that one in advance!)
It seems to be directly related to developmental changes, and added into the developmental chaos is teething all 4 of his two year molars at once!! I have consulted the ped. today, and she said it is common in some kids to have behavior changes in a consistant routine during major developmental milestones. For some kids it is bedtime/naptime anxiety, bathtime, and/or diaper changes...WHEW!!! It is reassuring that I'm not alone!!! This too shall pass!!
My so just recently started doing this...He will be 3 in July...he started pitching a fit, because he would rather be watching a cartoon or playing. So I went to ToysRus and bought a backyardigans and Deigo bathtub toys and it has worked like a charm. The color tablets and bubbles used to work also. So I guess my advise is to try and get something that he would like to play with or distract him.
My son went through the same thing about the same time. Lasted a couple weeks. It will pass. Maybe fewer hairwashes and keep it fun. Get some bubbles to blow in the tub and focus him on something else and hopefully that phase won't last long. If he's too distraught, I wouldn't push it though, get in wash fast and get out.
He may be afraid that he or his toys is going to go down the drain with the bathwater. My daughter, who was a good talker at an early age, was able to explain this to me when she was about your son's age. Try reassuring him by showing that toys and his feet don't fit down the drain.
I have 4 sons (all grown now) and a couple of them went through the same thing around the time they turned two. One used to love bubble baths but suddenly at that age he became afraid of bubbles and wind on his neck. Another developed a fear of the same dogs that he used to love playing with.
Fortunately for me, I had majored in Early Childhood Development while in college and taught nursery school, and observed this very same behavior in other children. It is a stage that many children go through sometime between the age of 18 months to 2-1/2 years. You may even notice that some children are more fearful of strangers and exhibit more than usual "separation anxiety". This is because they are at a stage when they are becoming more aware of the differences between themselves and other people, other things and their environment. It is almost as if a light was turned on in the dark and all of the creatures that have always been there, suddenly popped out! If he has no other serious neurological or other problem, you can probably rest assured that this phenomenon will go away just as quickly as it appeared. It did with mine and the other children whom I observed.
I wish I could offer more advise but it's been so very long ago for me. You may want to seek professional advise from your pediatrician but,in the meantime, remain calm and trust that, as his mom, you can probably be the best judge of what he needs in those anxious moments.
C. B-M
Hi Sarah,
You may have had these suggestions already:
-try shower instead of bath
-bubbles?
-bath toys, soaps, sponges, fishing?
-toys which he can "bathe"?
Hope something works for you.
-L. F.
(Murfreesboro, TN)
I'm compelled to write to you because your posting brought back some memories for me. My twin boys are 5 now but one of them did exactly the same thing in the bath at the same age. It seemed to come on for no reason and frankly, it went away for no reason, too. I tried to give him things to play with in the bath (besides his brother) like collanders from the kitchen, etc. I offered a shower to him and he tried it but it was kind of useless since he preferred to hug the back wall instead of really get wet. My husband bathed with him a few times and that worked. I think it's just timing and also maybe a little way of him asserting his independence. Good luck; our situation lasted a few months and bath time which previously had been lots of fun finally got fun again.
Hi Sarah~
I don't have any personal experience to share with you, but a friend of mine had a similar experience. Her daughter, then was about a year and a half old and she would just scream at bathtime. My friend figured out that it seemed her daughter was scared of the water going down the drain. She then intervened by saying "bye bye" when the water went down the drain and explaining and talking with her that the water has to go (or something like that). Good luck with your son.
P.
I agree that it could be a phase, it could be the sudden fear of being swept down the drain after having watched it and starting to understand it, or it could be that he is having sensitive skin right now. If he is getting his two year molars, it can cause not only fever, tummy troubles, crankiness, and exhaustion, but also more sensitive skin. 1) Check and see if there is anything else that seems to be bothering him. He is having diaper rash more easily right now? Is he breaking out? Is he avoiding anything else such as certain clothing, shoes, or blankets? In general I would just recommend being supportive and trying to help him through it. If he needs it, maybe just switch to "AirPlane" baths for a while, where he stands and you wash him down quickly with a washcloth. Good luck!
Iam not sure if this will help. It may create another problem..but You can give this a try.. Put on a bathing suit and get in with him. Then you gradually wing yourself away till he is comfortable in there by himself..Good luck!!
I would get into the bath with him, to show him it's ok to be in the tub. It simply could just be he had a nightmare about the tub and is now scared of it. If you don't want to get into the tub with him, put him in without water and spongebathe him. Hopefully in time, he will get over his fear of the tub and he'll be right back in there getting you and the bathroom floor soaked! Good luck!
Sarah,
I am sorry. This doesn't have anything to do with your request, however, in your profile, you said that you are a work from home mom. May I ask what you do? I am looking for something to help me along without going out and working the midnight shift. The only thing is I can't really do anything that you have to go give parties or have other people to beg to sell whatever I am selling. I don't know many people and am not comfortable in that situation. But would be very interested to know what you do as I desperately need an extra income.
Thanks, M.
my little girl normally loves her bath, but if she's overly tired she will fuss and cry the whole wat throguh. does he have toys to play with in tub, maybe he's bored. have you tried letting him shower with you or daddy. my little girl enjoys that too. she will sit on the bottom of the tub and play while we shower and the warm water "rains" on her. after we're done washing, we wash her and let the "rain" rinse her off. she plays in the water as it drains while we dry off and dress.
My daughter used to get a fit when it was time for a bath. we started with the shower, sprinkled her feet and slowly moved the water up her body when she was ready. We gave her some good bubbly soap to keep her busy and in good spirit. also, for a while we just used a washcloth.
(Now she is thirtenn and the showers take forever...)
Has he acted like his ears are bothering him? Sometimes they get ear aches from water in the ear and it can make things sound funny. And teeth issues can affect the ears too.
It's a stretch but...might be something.
Have you been the only one to bath him?Has anyone else ever gave him a bath?..sitter..husband..other family memebers.They might have done something he didnt like and now associates that to bath time...or...it could just a phase he is going through.Get him in the bath,clean him up and get him out like he wants..good luck..
S. B
Hi Sarah,
This may seem extreme, but have you thought about putting on your bathing suit and getting in with him? Or no suit, whatever you're comfy with. What about playing with him in the tub? I feel sad for him as well, I really wonder what's going on once he gets in...perhaps fear? Good luck and happy tubby time.
P.S.
Just read Debi B's response, something to think about with his ears and hearing things weird...especially with those teeth coming in.
This is only a guess, but when I had this happen with my 22 month old daughter, it turns out her bottom was irritated from loose stools she had been having (probably due to teething). It was not on the "cheeks" but kind of deep up in there, so I hadn't really noticed it. I think it really burned when it hit the water. I took her out right away and slathered her up with a soothing diaper cream, talking to her and promising Mommy was going to make it feel better. She quieted down right away and I've never had teh problem since. I hope its that easy for you.
Sounds like you have a very sensitive little fellow. Something has frightened him--possibly something like fear of being swept down the drain. Try using a shallow plastic container that will fit in the tub--you could even let him play bathtime in it before putting it in the bathtub. Put in just enough water to give him a decent bath. He could pretend it is a boat or pirate ship. The main thing is for him to have fun. Let him decide when he wants to take baths in the big tub--having control will help, and to encourage this--give him a new toy that is too big for the "little tub." Lots of hugs and reassurance--never can have too much of that! God bless you and your boys. D.
