Stuck on Choosing a Date!

Updated on October 06, 2009
S.F. asks from Tampa, FL
18 answers

I am due February 15th 2010 with my 2nd baby boy! I am planning my own shower but because of my due date I am afraid of planning the event too close to the holidays. I dont want my shower to feel like a burden to my guests since the economy is already playing a role in EVERYBODYS finances. I'm afraid of doing it too close to my due date since my 1st child was born 1 month before his due date! What do you recommend?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

So What Happened?

You know its funny because I get online all excited to read my responses and it is so disappointing when people dont even read my question! Did I ask about "etiquette" or being "apropriate" in relation to having another shower. MUCH LESS about wanting to plan it myself?! That is none of your buisness or concern. And IS NOT the question ladies. I am a HAPPY educated Hispanic who loves games and party planning,Please! us hispanics we look for reasons to get together as a family and party! And who sais my registery has big items? How does anybody know wether or not I just have diapers, wipes, and bare necesities like that on there? You dont know my situation. I am a very considerate person and do not like to inconvinience people wich is why my only concern is the date because I know there is nothing wrong with the way I have planned the rest. Maybe some people will learn to be a little more considerate and respectful when answering a question (of course you need to attentively read it before that happens!).

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.V.

answers from Miami on

Hi! My son was born 2/6/09, so I had the same problem. My husband had the shower the 1st weekend of November. It worked out really well. I was scared to have mine too close to my due date too cause my daughter came a month early too! Let me know if you need any baby shower ideas. I just planned my friends so I have lots of ideas. Good luck!!
Cathy

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.J.

answers from Tallahassee on

Actually, I thought the tradition was that a woman only "receives" (not throws herself) a shower for her first baby? I've always known both to be a no-no (mother planning and having more than one shower).

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.L.

answers from Orlando on

I don't think it's tacky to have a baby shower for the 2nd baby. Every baby is special and deserves a baby shower! :-) I do however wonder why you have to plan your own shower? I've never heard of that. I would plan it after the Holidays - maybe like the 1st or 2nd week in Jan. Like the other poster said, there is no gaurantee the 2nd baby will come a month early too. The holidays are so busy for alot of people....people might not be able to attend right before Christmas - or ... have it the very beginning of Dec.

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.J.

answers from Orlando on

Hey Sarah

Congrats on your baby. Don't listen to some of this women if you want a shower you go and have one i would due it in november or the first week in december or maybe after the baby comes i would call it a diaper shower still register for what you did not get or have for your first one good luck if you need any more advice do not hestite to email me
[email protected]____.com good luck

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.G.

answers from Orlando on

Why don't you just have a "Welcome Baby" party after the baby's birth instead of a shower? (Many people think it's rude to have a shower-no offense-if you already have other children unless someone else wants to throw one for you.) That way, the guests won't feel as pressured to buy gifts, and they'll be excited to see your new little guy!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

Y.F.

answers from Orlando on

Congratulations on your baby!

I have always recommended to do a baby shower at least 6 - 8 weeks prior to due date. I did it with my pregnancy's as well. I wanted to still be physically able to do things and put away the gifts and organize everything after the party. I would do it for the last week of november or the 1st week of december.

P.S. I have never heard it to be "rude" to havea another baby shower cause you have additional children. Have fun and enjoy it!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

Oh my gosh!!! There is NOTHING wrong with having a baby shower for a 2nd, 3rd or even 4th baby.. and if you want to throw your own party then do it!! Its your pregnacy/baby do it YOUR way... You werent asking whether or not to actually have a shower ANYWAY!!! I think you should do it the first week of January. And if your sweet lil man comes early then do it when you are feeling up to it after he is born. I DO think the diaper shower is a great idea.. diapers are SO expensive, you will need so many and you will be so greatful that you dont have to run to the store so often after he is here. But like the previous poster said still register cause some people my want to get diapers plus other things too... Please message me if you need anything else... you seem very sweet and I would be happy to help! Good luck and God bless!!!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.O.

answers from Jacksonville on

THere's no guarantee your 2nd child will be born 1 month before your due date - Still schedule it in Jan and go with the flow

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.O.

answers from Jacksonville on

Early NOvember or wait until afterwards adn have a welcome baby party in March.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.V.

answers from Miami on

That was my due date in 2007! I had the same fears. My friend starting planning mine for the end of January and I got nervous so we moved it up to the first weekend in December. (Then my son ended up coming 6 days late anyways.) We had a good turn out of friends and family and I was still comfortable enough in the pregnancy that I had a good time. Towards the end with the tiredness and the aches and pains I don't know how much fun I would've had.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Tampa on

I know that alot of people have showers for additional children, but I was always told you get a shower just for your first baby. There will always be exceptions of course, like if you had your children far apart, but that was the general rule. I feel people who are close to you will buy a gift for the baby anyway and will probably ask what you need since it is the second baby. Since you seem to be concerned about the holidays and people's finances, maybe it is not something to plan at all unless someone decides to throw one for you.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.D.

answers from Tampa on

I agree with the "no-no" to the baby shower for a 2nd, unless it has been 5+ years since the 1st one or it is the opposite sex of the 1st baby. I just had my 2nd child 7 weeks ago, both are boys. My friends threw me a shower, but, they had a diaper shower instead, which I think is perfectly fine. Everyone that attends brings a package of diapers instead of a gift. Some friends did give more than just a package of diapers, but that was all that was asked of them. Then, your guests can spend what is comfortable for them since packages of diapers can range in size and price from $10-40. Just let everyone know they type you prefer when you send out the invites. As for the date, I would try and do it close the the beginning of December since after the holidays cuts it pretty close to your due date!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.H.

answers from Punta Gorda on

I would wait until after the baby is born. Like other ppl have mentioned it is a bit taboo to have a baby shower for baby number 2 especially if they aren’t more than 5 years apart and they are the same gender. I think by having the shower after the baby is born you wont have as many ppl judging you. then it would be more of a welcome baby party instead of a baby shower. If you want to have a girls day before the baby is born invite some of your best girl friends and go do something fun. Lunch maybe get your nails done have a massage go shopping something like that just make it clear that everyone pays there own way(and they will probably pitch in and treat you as well). That sounds more fun than having ppl guess how big your belly is anyway.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.T.

answers from Tampa on

I'm with the majority here - against having a baby shower for a 2nd baby. And most especially if you're planning it for yourself. (I don't think anyone should even plan their own shower for a 1st child). To me, it just looks like a way to get presents and seems kind of tacky.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.B.

answers from Tampa on

What is the age difference between your two boys? Typically you only have one baby shower ( I have only heard of people having more then one if the gape is 6yrs or greater) I saved all my things, I knew I def. wanted more then one...............

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

i would probably wait until after the baby is born if you have a baby shower. i don't know if i would even have one. depends on when you had the first baby, though. you said that they are both boys and a lot of people i have talked to won't do a baby shower if it's close in age to the first or the same sex. you should still have a lot of stuff if the eldest is still young. what you might want to do is just send out a welcome baby card after he's born and if people want to send you something they can. it is very close behind the holidays and most people are strapped for cash. this way you won't get your feelings hurt if you throw the baby shower and not a lot of people come, you know? i had a baby shower for my 2nd (boy) almost 2 yrs after my first (girl) my mom threw it, and i felt bad for having it bc i always heard just for the first unless it was a long time. i still had all of my stuff (stroller/walker/carseats,etc) so i didn't need anything.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.T.

answers from Orlando on

I absolutely agree with the other 2 responses. Throwing your own shower is just asking for presents. I just had my second and I just went on to Craigslist and it's amazing what you can find that is beautiful and new. Give it a try if you desperately need stuff.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

I woudl have to say, that Miss Manners would probably pipe up and say that planning your own shower is a no-no. The shower is intended to be something your friend's, sisters or possibly mother would plan to get everyone together to shower you with gifts. Planning a date for everyone to bring you gifts is sort of...rude. I know how much fun showers are and how much you really need new items, but for yearsm showers were only given to a new mother with her first baby or to a mom whose children were VERY spaced apart ( more than 6-10 years) because she probably didn't have anything any more for an unexpected baby. I would instead register for items you need and want at a few stores and when people ask you if you need anything for the baby, tell them where you registered. You could happen to mention to your closest friends and family that since no one will probably throw you a shower this time that you will plan a "meet the baby" party after this baby is born. someone may be planning a shower for you anyways and you don't know it. Plan to have a party to have everyone over to meet the baby about 2 weeks after he/she is born. People will always bring a gift and you can take pictures for this child to have as a memory.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions