Still Swaddling and Co-sleeping at 5 Months

Updated on January 13, 2009
C.B. asks from Salem, MA
29 answers

We are still swaddling my 5 month old daughter (in the Kiddopotomas SwaddleMe) and putting her in a co-sleeper next to my bed. She is sleeping great - a 10pm to 7am stretch of solid sleep. However, I'm getting anxious that we should stop the swaddling and also put her in her own crib in her own room. People are telling me it's "time". I'm starting work next week, so don't want to make too many changes in her life right now. But I admit she is getting a little too big for her co-sleeper. I also think the swaddling is is affecting her nap schedule. I don't swaddle her for them, and she only goes an hour or so at a time. I hate to disrupt her happy night pattern and I know I'll feel anxious once she's in the other room, but I know I have to at some point. Has anyone gone through this or any advice? Thanks!

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S.I.

answers from Boston on

Swaddling is a life saver. Let her stay swaddled as long as she wants. At some point she'll bust out every night and then you'll reminisce for the good old days. Savor it while it lasts!

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P.N.

answers from Boston on

I don't believe in "it's time." I found with my DD that she did things when she was ready regardless of what time I might have thought it was. LOL. And if my baby were sleeping like that I would do NOTHING to change it!! Really, I have yet to find that if you don't do something by some magic window it is too late. She will outgrow the need to be swaddled when she is ready but there is nothing wrong with doing what works for her.

I would recommend that you don't discuss sleep with others though unless you do have an actual issue and want their advice. But especially where you are going back to work, don't mess with the sleep!!!

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D.T.

answers from Boston on

Hi,

I wouldn't try changing too many things at once. Going to work is a big change and she may want to be that much closer to you when you are home.

Does she nap in her crib? It seems like that might be a good starting point so she can get used to the room.

As far as the swaddling, I am glad to see we aren't the only long-time swaddlers! My daughter is almost 9 months and we still swaddle her in a blanket. For us it isn't so much about the swaddle as it is about the pacifier. Unfortunately she is hooked on the pacifier for sleeping, but will pull it out of her mouth if her hands are free.

You might consider swaddling her in a blanket, that way she can get out of it if she wants to. Also, I know some people transition by having one arm out, then both arms out.

good luck

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D.H.

answers from Lewiston on

Hi C.!
We swaddled our baby girl for naps and nighttimes and she also slept great. We continued to swaddle until she was strong enough to break free herself with her arms, but still swaddled her legs to keep her warm. She slept so great, so why stop? Our daughter liked it and it soothed her.
But, I would recommend moving her as soon as you can to her own bed-- for you and her. The sooner she gets use to her own space the better your great sleeper will be in the long run. (Before she realizes where she is and demands to sleep in a certain location!!!)
I know it is a hard transition, but she's sleeping all night, so don't worry! I would use a monitor and you can check on her as many times as you want. FYI: I have a friend who has two kids still in bed with her because she waited too long to transition them! YIKES!!!!!

Good luck and I hope the transition goes smoothly.

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M.B.

answers from New London on

Hi C.,
It sounds like she is doing great when she sleeps. I don't know of many babies that sleep that long and that well! Don't listen to what others say. You can keep her in your room for as long as you want. We put our first two in their own room when they were babies. ( It is right next to our bathroom, so very close) When we had our third, he stayed in our room for most of the time. We even put the crib in our room because the other two were sleeping well. Our room is the biggest bedroom. We didn't want to interrupt the other kids sleep, by the baby waking up during the night. It worked out fine having him in our room. Other people have to mind their business. If your daughter is in your room, what harm is there in that. Studies show that the closer babies are to mom, the safer they are. When you start back to work, you will be more tired. Having her right there next to you will be easier for you, and you will probably sleep better. You can move her to her crib when you want, and when you are ready. Don't feel pressured. It sounds like you are doing a great job with her..... trust your instincts! M.

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D.F.

answers from Boston on

C.,

Why change anything if its going so well? You will know when its time. Listen to your self, you will know best. And when its time to put her in her own room, get a video monitor. Sounds like your doing great.

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C.C.

answers from Boston on

well if she is not sleeping actually IN your bed it might not be too tough .. my 2 year old daughter is now starting to wake up in the middle of the night because she wants me to sleep with her. (my own fault she never slept a night in her crib) i'd say just go slow .. don't expect it to all happen in one night and also don't listen to everyone else because that is how they do things do it when you are ready and when you feel she is ready !!!
:) hope i was helpful

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M.F.

answers from New London on

Hi C.,

All 3 of my girls stayed in my and my husbands' room until a week after they turned 1. We also had a small bassinett for each, which they outgrew before the year was up. Since we still wanted to have the baby in our room, we replaced the bassinett with a pack-n-play. This has worked great with all 3 of my girls, an really helped them when they went ot day care, since that's where they would sleep while there.

Regarding the swaddling: I swaddled all 3 of my kids until they were able to squirm their way out of it. I also swaddled for nap time, and would undo the swaddle, if the baby was sleeping too long. They would all wake as soon as I'd take the swaddle apart. They all slept better when swaddled, so why change that. Now, 5, 2 and 1, they are all great sleepers.

It's ultimately your choice when the baby leaves your room. My husband and I just agreed that 12 months was the time. Ironically, instead of sleeping worse (them from being away from us, and us from concern of them being alone), we all sleep more peacfully, and fully.

Good luck!

Mari

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M.L.

answers from Boston on

Hi,
Please don't worry about swaddling your baby at 5 mos. I swaddled both of my girls until 7-8 months and they both are very very good sleepers now. I wouldn't worry about their level of development, they will catch up very quickly. So if that is what people are saying, not to worry. Sleep is VERY important to a baby and to Mommy! You sounded like you didn't want to yet so listen to your gut and no one else.

FYI- My pediatrician was well aware of the fact that I was still swaddling both children at six months and she was very okay with it.

Good luck!

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K.H.

answers from Boston on

We swaddled our daughter until around 7 months. She slept very well that way and seemed to need it that long. Our doctor assured us that it was not inhibiting her motor development (as long as her ball and socked joints were able to open when swaddled). But we swaddled mostly because of her very active hands and arms, not her legs. Eventually she seemed more frustrated by the swaddle and we realized it must be time to be rid of it. We started to wean her by swaddling one arm out for a little while and then removed it and she slept very well without it. It was scary to not swaddle her since it was all we have ever known. But she adjusted very well and is an extremely good sleeper at 14 months (12 hours a night, every night). Good luck and listen to your daughter ;)

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C.S.

answers from New London on

I don't have any advice about the co-sleeping (I've never done it, so don't know what to tell you), but as far as swaddling goes, if she won't sleep without it, I don't think she's too old for it. If she sleeps better with it, I can only see good.

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I wouldn't make a change just because others are telling you "it's time." Also, if your daughter is used to being swaddled AND she's in a cozy cosleeping bed, then moving her to a large crib unswaddled may make her a little anxious - too much space and not enough closeness.

You can try swaddling everything but the one arm. Then graduate to 2 arms, and so on, gradually loosing/reducing the swaddling. If you move her to the crib, then I wouldn't change the swaddling for another month.

Some kids feel really snug in blanket sleepers, first the "bag" style and then footed pajamas. Mine did. You also don't have to worry about them shaking off the blankets and getting cold. Remember that you're getting into the stage when she can turn herself over too, so swaddling may actually be more of a problem for her if she wants to move and is capable of it.

You can also try confining her a little bit in her crib - be sure whatever you use keeps her safe. As she starts moving around, you don't want her to get tangled or underneath something.

Does the one hour nap seem to "hold" her for the day, or is she showing any signs of being sleep-deprived in the afternoon? If it's fine, don't mess with it. She is sleeping great at night.

Also, once you go back to work, will you be maintaining that same nap schedule?

Re being nervous - once she goes in the other room, she'll be old enough to make plenty of noise if she needs you! A good monitor will take care of things! I know it's a huge transition, but you will need plenty of rest when you go back to work too - so take care of yourself as well.

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L.K.

answers from Boston on

The great thing about you being the mom is you get to decide what is best for your family. If you like co-sleeping and swaddling, then keep doing it. Don't let other people make you feel pressured to do otherwise. My son slept in our bed with us until he was 8 months. At that time I wanted my bed back and put him in his own room. I know have a 5 week old and we are co-sleeping again. I don't know when he will get moved to his crib.. I'll just make that decision when I feel it's time.

Good luck,

L.

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C.R.

answers from Boston on

Hi C.:
First of all, don't listen to anyone who tells YOU when anything is time with YOUR baby. You do what works for you and her and your family. Many babies spend the first few years in their parents room and this is healthy, if it works for you and your family. Swaddling is fine for as long as it works. My pedi told us that she had a friend, who was a neurologist, and swaddled her son til he was 8 months old, because he slept well and it worked for them! Swaddling will not harm your baby, but she eventually may start breaking out of it (that's when we stopped). It breaks my heart to hear about moms and dads who are guilt tripped into making changes that don't feel right, because of outside advice. I've had my own internal struggles as a new mom, but what has really helped, are the moms I talk to who encourage me to parent the way that feels right, by instinct, and I encourage you to do the same. If you are not ready to move your daughter to her own room, then don't. And if she is sleeping so well, I would not change a thing!!!!! What you are doing is working, so let it work and enjoy this time with your babe!!
Congratulations.
C.

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S.S.

answers from Boston on

C.,

My daughter loved to be swaddled. She slept so much better and longer when swaddled. And candidly, I don't see what's wrong with that. Eventually my daughter didn't want it - she kicked out of the swaddle and so I got those blanket-sleeper-things that is like a dress with sleeves and a sewn together bottom? Can't remember what they're called. But we used them until we were comfortable using a blanket.

But I think my daughter was swaddled until 9 months or so. Honestly, I don't see the harm in it. Perhaps I'm mis informed, but if it gives her comfort and it's not harming her, why stop?

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R.B.

answers from Boston on

Said with love.... don't rush your daughter out of her comfort zone. If co-sleeping gives you both comfort, stick with it alittle longer. Swaddling is just fine at her age as well, not to mention keeping her warm at night. You could do it even for her naps. Why not? A good friend of mine, who is also a midwife had her son in daycare a couple days a week @ six months and they brought him back to swaddling for his naps and she said it made all the difference for him. She will tell you when she's ready to stop, she'll want her hands or want to sleep on her tummy. Remember this is a precious time and we are one of the few species that rush our babies out of our immediate space so quickly. If the co-sleeping is over, then she will adjust better keeping her swaddled a bit longer too.

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J.F.

answers from Barnstable on

I went through the same thing. I found that by the time my son was 6-7 months, he was busting out of his swaddle and without it, would not go back to sleep. So we just stopped and it took a few days but he got used to not being swaddled. I would keep her co-sleeping while you make this transition. I think loosing one security feeling at a time is enough. Once she gets used to sleeping without the swaddling, then move her to her room. Which is harder on us then them. I could hear a pin drop I was sleeping so lightly at first. Hope this helped.

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J.H.

answers from Boston on

I would have to say listen to your daughter, she will let you know when she is ready for a change. As long as you are comfortable with the arrangement and it is working why change it. My daughter slept in bed between us for her first 9 months, people kept telling us it was dangerous, she would never want to sleep in her crib, we were going to have so many problems. At 9 months she started kicking us and waking up to play in the middle of the night. We started transitioning her to her crib in her own room and in less than a week she was sleeping there all night long. It was because she was ready to have her own space. The same thing happened with my son but he was ready at 7 months. Don't let people tell you what you should do. Sounds like you have a great arrangmement and I would say just let it go as long as possible. She will grow up so fast, enjoy this special time you have. Good Luck!

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L.L.

answers from Burlington on

Hi there... just wanted to respond and encourage you to go w/ what feels right to you, not listen to outside people telling you it's "time"...we co slept w/ my daughter until she was almost 3, and my son who is 2 yrs 3 mths is still in bed w/ us (although transitioning out due to new baby coming in march!)
as far as the swaddling, i wouldn't rock the boat! If swaddling gets you all nightime sleep, then it's worth it. If there is one thing I've learned from parenting it's do what works for the moment. And from all I've read, sleep begets sleep, if you disturb her nightime sleep her naps may actually get worse, not better.
Good luck to you,enjoy your baby!
L.

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E.N.

answers from Hartford on

I hear your voice, versus "people." Follow your own instincts. Sounds like as you are going back to work, keep change to a slow minimum. After she gets used to that, change the sleeping method? Forget "people" and listen to your gut. You sound like a great Mom.

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R.M.

answers from Boston on

Hi C.,
I had a similar experience. We swaddled our daughter and she slept in her car seat for the first 8 weeks of her life. Then we put her car seat in her crib for another week and took her out of the car seat, keeping her in her swaddle wrap. We kept her in her swaddle wrap for 6.5 months and have taken her out of it this past week. She is doing great. I think she likes the freedom. We stopped cold turkey.

To transition to her own crib I would try naps in her crib in her room. I would keep the swaddle wrap for a little bit until she gets used to her crib and her room. I also left one of my shirts in her room so my scent was in the room. I really stressed about all the sleep changes but babies transition well. It may take a couple of days but you may all sleep better. Hope this works for you.

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L.M.

answers from Boston on

C.,

Go slow. There are a lot of things you talk about with changes. Just you going back to work is a big change for your daughter. Take your time and see what happens after you go back to work for a couple of weeks. Once she has adjusted to that change in her life then try not swaddling her at night. After she gets used to that try moving her the the other room. I don't think the order in which you change things is an issue it's more like allowing her to adjust before going on. Don't worry about what other's say she is your baby and you know her best and what is best for her and you. Trust your instincts.

Good luck,
L. M

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A.H.

answers from Hartford on

I think you have to do what's right for you and your family. It sounds like your daughter is happy & healthy and everyone is getting sleep! We coslept with my daughter until about 8 months when it became clear that none of us were really sleeping well, so we moved her into a pack n'play in our room. After about a month it became clear that she was so aware of us in the room now that she wasn't sleeping as long as she could. So we made the decision to move her into her own room. This was at about 10 months or so.
Every baby is different, don't bow to pressure from people who don't know your baby as well as you do. If you yourself feel that change needs to happen or if your baby doesn't seem to be happy in a particular situation than that's the clue that something needs to change.

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

I swaddled my son until he was started wanting wake upset that he couldn't move around in his crib. I had him in a co-sleeper and once he was out of it his crib went right next to the bed so if he was upset he could reach over and rub his back moving him out of our room was the biggest mistake I ever made after the move he started waking at night now that he shares a room with his big brother he sleeps a little better only waking once but he was a great sleeper when in our room. Don't let people try to talk you out of sharing your room with your daughter if she is sleeping great keep her swaddled it obviously helps her feel secure if she is too big for the co-sleeper you have try having her in a crib right next to the bed if I could do it over I would have waited and let my son decide when to move out of our bedroom like several people that I know. They have wonderful sleep help at askdrsears.com and his books are great! I have several of them. If you are going back to work you aren't going to want to be getting up several times a night it will really wear you out just because a lot of people have issues with co-sleeping don't let them talk you out of the sleep arangement that works for both you and your daughter if she's happy and you're happy let it be she will let you know when she no longer needs to be swaddled and you will know when it feels right to move her out of your room they are only young once don't rush it.

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C.L.

answers from Boston on

my daughter who is also 5 mos old and is still swaddling and sleep in her pack n play crib next to my bed too! she have her own crib and NEVER sleep in it yet. i am perfect happy with my daughter being swaddle overnight because it keep her sleep thru whole night. if i dont swaddle her and if she move her arm in her sleep then she will wake up and cry cry cry. swaddle do her good. i let the legs be loosen tho. my daughter can break out the swaddle in the am when she wake up. i dont swaddle her during nap time. only bedtime. it is your choice to decide when to stop.
as for she sleep in ur bdrm, it is still fine. it is ur choice to decide when move her to her bdrm.

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K.C.

answers from Boston on

Agreeing with other moms to listen to yourself over all.
At my LLL, there's one mom who swaddled for so long they were buying bed sheets to do it, so 5 months is certainly not too late!

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H.B.

answers from Boston on

We swaddled my daughter WAY past 5 months - gosh I think she was maybe even a year or more before she could sleep without being swaddled. And she didn't go into her crib in her room until she was 19 months. Infants - that is children under 1 year old - should, if at all possible, should sleep in close proximity to their parents. If she's getting to big for the co-sleeper, maybe just moving her crib to your room? Best of luck.

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L.D.

answers from Boston on

there is absolutely no need to stop co-sleeping! what you could do is put her in her own crib and attach it to your bed, this works really great. especially since you are going back to work, you want to continue to give her the closeness and comfort she gets from co-sleeping. there is a couple of great articles on co-sleeping in this issue of Mothering Magazine (i believe you can also access them online at their website) definitely check them out. and lastly, you need not listen to anyone's "advice" on the matter, listen to your daughters needs and trust your own instincts. Good luck!

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R.H.

answers from Boston on

You and your family will know when "it is time," one thing I've learned as a first time mom is that my instincts are usually better than most of the advice I get from friends and family. If you think she's getting too big for the co-sleeper though, try putting her in the crib after doing your usual bedtime routine. You might want to keep the swaddle until she gets used to the crib. I think sometimes these transitions are easier for the baby than they are for us :)

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