Son with Bi-Polar No One Will Help

Updated on March 14, 2013
A.A. asks from Columbia, SC
7 answers

My adult son was diagonss at the age of 6 with ADHD, at the age of 11 they added Bi-Polar. He been on 12 types of medication (this is a low number, its what I can remember) for both issues. At the age of 15, he stopped. Everyone from Phycoligist, to counslors to doctors of all sorts. That maybe some day you would have to go on it. Know at the age of 27, its been bad. Over the last year he has gone through 5 jobs. (the first one he had for several years) Lost about 50 lbs, started to complaine of not sleeping. He does not live with me. God hope he keeps his house. Its been CRYING, SCREAMING, TALKING TO HIMSELF, NOT EATING OR SLEEPING, LOOKS SO DIRTY (THAT WAS NEVER HIM) I can not get him help. Cause of no insurance... What am I suppose to do? He BEGGING for help!!!! Do WE all sit around untill something REALLY BAD HAPPENS???? I am scared to death for him, no ONE WILL LISTEN!!!! It is making me sick, emotional and physchially. PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!

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So What Happened?

Thank you to all that answer. I took up the advise of inpatient care. We are going this afternoon, (he agreed) THANK YOU GOD.... Yes to the one who stated the combination of ADHD AND BI-POLAR. All I did was tell you what they (the doctors) stated. We got to get this fixed for him. (Him and I) I PRAY that this will not be another circle. I could NOT take anymore. Never mind HOW HE FEELS. I (once again) thank you ALL for your comment and suggestion. I found this site by accident and so GLAD I DID.

More Answers



answers from San Francisco on

I am so very sorry you and your son are going through this. Once again, let's thank Ronald Regan for closing all of our mental health hospitals!

Unless you have money or insurance, there really isn't much anyone can/will do to help you until your son commits a crime and then everyone will be looking to lock him up and they will all be saying "where were his parents." Just like people on this site said when that poor guy killed all those innocent school children.

People just don't understand that unless you are independtly wealthy, you are not getting mental health treatment. Period.

At the very least, please apply for social security and Medicaid for him. At least that way he can hopefully have some out-patient treatment and medication. Of course, the application and approval process will probably take 6 months. In the meantime, call your local county hospital and see if you can get him committed for a 3 day observation period. That would at least get him some temporary, immediate assistance.

Again, so very sorry you are going through this. I know it's truly heartbreaking!

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Oklahoma City on

Take him to the ER while he is in distress and ask that they do a psych eval for 72 hour commitment, or whatever they call it these days. But this way they can get him taken away and put in patient, they'll evaluate him if they are worth anything and shoot him up. Then when he's lucid they'll talk to him, if you have any influence on him he needs to agree to inpatient treatment for a long stint. He's mentally ill and is in need of protection from himself.

That's all that you can do. He has to go to the ER and ask to be put inpatient. You can be there but he needs to say the words. I did this to my daughter and actually signed the papers to have her held against her will if she changed her mind.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

Have you looked into getting him Social Security Disability? My little brother is 27 and has schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. He receives disability and qualifies for Section 8 housing, although he is still living with my parents.

He has a social worker, correct? If he has been in the mental health system for most of his life, I imagine that he does. The social worker should be able to assist in getting him help.

Does he have violent tendencies, or has he ever made threats against himself or others? If so, that is a fast track to getting some help, as you could get him held for 72 hrs while they evaluate him.

ETA: If you fear for YOUR safety or for his, rather than take him to the hospital yourself, call the police to bring him. We have done this a couple of times for my little brother, as he is MUCH bigger and stronger than my parents. He is very cooperative with the police.

7 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

I would talk to the county hospital. A lot of them have clinics that depending on income will treat. My mom had to go into one (No insurance) to balance out her meds. It was not a fancy one but they took good care of her and she got the help she needed.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Dover on

Do you have a local clinic? What about one run by Div. of Social Services? Can you check with the same people that handle Medicaid and other state assistance? There should be some places that can at least direct you to help but I don't know those places would be in SC as I'm not familiar with that area.

@Cheryl...let's not get in the blame game. Every president can be blamed for something and no matter how good they are will never please everyone 100% of the time but at least Reagan was honest and pro-America.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Grand Rapids on

Check with your county on mental health services.Here in Michigan we have county mental health facilities that people can go to.
I was a job coach for six years and one of the places I worked was there, running the janitorial crew.

Good luck

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Boston on

Misdiagnoses are tremendous problems, and overmedication (or improper medication) is just as big. There are things that can be done nutritionally, but you need his participation and cooperation. If he is begging for help and will work toward his own recovery with any resources you help provide, that's great. If he's just "crying out" but unable to participate, you made need additional intervention.

Does he life alone? You say he has a house but not if there are others living there.

If he has no job and no insurance, he should qualify for some state or federal coverage: Medicaid, Social Security Disability, etc. Call your state mental health department. If he has a primary care physician, call that doctor NOW and get some resources. If your son has not designated you or someone else as his health care proxy, see if you can arrange that - it may be difficult if he is not deemed competent right now. Or see if you can get him to see his doctor and take you along, which will give permission for the doctor to talk to you. The government has a compelling interest in helping those who are not competent to take care of themselves, so you may be looking at commitment (involuntary) to get him some emergency psychiatric help. I don't know what you mean by "no one will listen." Do you mean no one will listen to YOU? Is that because you have no legal standing over an adult? Or do you mean he is reaching out and they will not listen to HIM?

No, you don't sit around waiting for something awful - you must get him into some help. If he is a danger to himself or others, then more can be done. It will not be pretty or pleasant in the beginning, but usually those who are committed for observation and treatment eventually come around and say "thank you" for intervening. But you must educate yourself and go through emergency channels.

Good luck.

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