Son's Birthday This Saturday and the Kids??

Updated on April 08, 2010
S.T. asks from Kansas City, KS
9 answers

My son turned 7 today and his party is Saturday we only invited all the boys from class and he has a set of twins in there one boy and one girl well I went to have lunch today and they were all talking about his party and the twin girl said she was coming that her mom told her she could come I plan on calling the parents that I haven't heard from tonight to see who all is coming should I ask the mom or see if she says something about her coming and if she does I will tell her that's fine but then should I invite a few other girls or just let it be?? Thank you

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C.M.

answers from Austin on

I would call the mom and let her know (politely) that you have only invited other boys, will be doing "boy-centric" activities and perhaps her daughter will be uncomfortable. Don't worry about inviting other kids. Her mom should have called to ask or included her in the RSVP.

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T.V.

answers from San Francisco on

AFTER READING MORE RESPONSES:
There is no legitimate school system in the United States that can force you to invite children or adults to your home for a party. If any U.S. school board has such a charter, I can assure you it is not in line with our "freedom of choice", and probably should be amended.

I'm sure your intention is to give your child a nice party and not to hurt the feelings of any little child. If that little girl's biggest problem is not getting to attend an ALL boys party, she will be just fine. If she is upset (not heartbroken), it is up the HER mother, to explain and comfort her.

I wish your twins a very happy birthday and hope your don't feel forced to go to the additional expense and work by inviting extra children (girls) that your twins don't want to be at THEIR party, for one child's, temporary disappointment.

S.,

You should let the mom of the twins know this party is just for BOYS! There will come a time when a mixed group will be fine, but not this time. You can't let others dictate what you chose to do in your own home.

It would be up to the twins mother to do something speical for her daughter and explain to her that she will NOT always be included in her brothers activities nor he in HERS!

Blessings.....

4 moms found this helpful
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M.J.

answers from Joplin on

in our school system they will not allow you to invite certain kids. if you invite one you invite all. this age kids dont understand the boy/girl thing. just to let you know that little girl is gonna be heartbroken.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

My thought is to politely let the mom know that the daughter is more than welcome to attend; however, your son had just invited the boys from his class and there would be no other girls there. Surely the other mom will understand. We had this situation arise last year when my son wanted an all-boy party and I wondered how the twin sister would feel. But just because they are twins, they can't be expected to be invited to all the same parties. As to our school rules, no invitations are allowed to be handed out at school so no feelings are hurt if someone wasn't invited. They all have to be sent in the mail and you are free to invite whoever you want. Good luck.

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

Ditto Toni!! My goodness, don't schools have enough to do with, oh say, maybe EDUCATING our children, rather than playing party police?

You are under no obligation to try to accomodate this girl and quite frankly, I find it extremely rude that the mother would do this!

This is your son's birthday and if he wants only boys, then only boys can and should come. I would emphasize to the mom that she will be the only girl there (and I would be apalled if she still wanted her to come!) so she shouldn't get upset if no other girls are there.

Good luck, I hope your son has a terrific time at his party and I wish you hadn't been put in this situation!!

1 mom found this helpful
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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

In that case, I think the invitation should have been explicitly addressed to the boy twin (in the event it wasn't). Perhaps, because they have fraternal twins, they don't realize that their daughter may be out of place or uncomfortable.

Personally, I'd let the girl twin come and leave it at that - I wouldn't invite more girls for her sake (it's your son's party).

Good luck. Hoping it's a great day for your son.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.H.

answers from Boston on

Since you already decided to have an all boys party, it might be a good idea to mention that to the twins mother, maybe she didn't realize it and thought they were both invited. You just wouldn't want the little girl to feel really left out if there's no other girls there, that could be awkward. Just explain nicely to the other mother and I'm sure she'll be fine with it. She has to realize that even though they are twins, they will have different friends and do different activities sometimes.

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J.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Ditto to Kerri M's response.

D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree with everyone...when you make the calls, and to the twins call, if the mother does't ask if the girl can be invited then leave it at that. Don't bring it up. Have a few extra goody bags, if you are doing them, just in case. Don't invite other girls just because she may be going. They are 7 and mom should know that her son will have different friends than his sister. The fact that they are in the same class is wrong, they should be serperated anyway. Anyway, if she shows up then include her in all the boys activities and if any other mom asks why she is there, you can politely say her mom thought she was invited. Don't change your plans to accomodate this girl. MOM needs to learn that she will be going to parties her son won't be going to and vice versa. It is called life! Grow up and deal. Not you, her. Good luck and God Bless.

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