Son Spelling His Name

Updated on December 07, 2010
P.C. asks from Vallejo, CA
12 answers

My son is 4.5 yrs old, in his second year of preschool. I have noticed that other kids his age are able to write their name out on paper and he can't. He is able to spell it out verbally when I ask him to, but not on paper. Now, I don't know if he is a lefty or what but when I give him a pencil to write with he grabs it with his right. But yet he throws with force and does everything with his left hand ever since he was 1 yrs old. I made him write with his left hand and he couldn't. Should I be concerned about this?
I'm worried!

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J.C.

answers from New York on

I hear that a lot of kids have trouble simply (or not so simply) holding a pencil correctly. Ask his teacher to sit with both of you and show him how to do it. Then reinforce it at home. Add a little reward to keep it fun.

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L.M.

answers from Dover on

It could be that he isn't sure which hand to write with or maybe he hasn't developed the fine motoer skills to write yet.

Working with playdough, finger paints, lots of pens, pencils, crayons, markets, etc, threading pasta or lace boards will help if it is the latter.

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D.B.

answers from Detroit on

Walmart has a PreK workbook that helps with practicing writing all the letters of the alphabet, as well as drawing circles, squares, squiggly lines, etc. It actually starts out with learning to draw lines and circles, and moves on to letters. All of these skills are needed to learn to write. It encourages the use of fine motor skills and is bright and colorful and FUN! I think the workbook was about $10 and I would set aside 15 to 20 minutes per day to work on it with my son. We chose right before lunch, while it was cooking. As a previous poster recommended, stop when he seems to be getting bored or frustrated.....you want him to view this as something FUN, not a chore. Also, I got a dry erase place mat with the alphabet and numbers on it (both caps and lower case letters), also at Walmart for about $5. My son really got a kick out of using the markers (usually off limits at our house) and he liked "erasing" it himself.

3 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

It is not unusual for a 4 1/2 year old not to have those fine motor skills built up yet..

Here are son fun things you can do with him at home to get his hands and fingers strengthened up.

Let him lead the way with his hand preference. He may end up ambidextrous.. where he can use both hands..

Have him roll little balls of playdo using only in index and thumb.. He can do this with both hands.. Have him line them up, and then have him go back and mash then only using his forefinger.. The next time he makes a row of the balls, have him only mash with his forefingers.. Have him make a tower as tall as possible stacking the playdo balls. Have him mash the tower with his forefingers.

Give him 2 clothes pins.. Have him go around and pick up stuff only using the clothes pins.. Again only using thumb and forefinger.. Make it a contest and see who can pick up the biggest (not the heaviest)things with only 1 clothes pin.

Get a box of small paper clips and have him make a paper clip chain with all of them.. Another time, have him make a chain out of a whole bx of Large paper clips.. Hang these chains in his room. Each time he brings home artwork.. have him paperclip the art to his chain.

Gather all of the loose chain around the house.. have him separate them into different piles.. Then have him make stacks of 10 for the different coins..

Have him separate a jar of buttons by size and then by color another time.

Get a really large piece of blank paper.. Old giftwrap paper on the backside works great.. Give him a crayon and have him draw the longest line he can draw.. Then have him draw great big circles. Then a long wiggle line.. Then have him get some of his match box sized cars and only using and index finger, have him "drive" his cars up the different lines.. Again do this with each hand till you can tell her preferred hand..

Work puzzles together. Then mix 2 puzzles together and have him make both puzzles at once.

A wipe board or chalk board are great for him to practice letters. Let him be the teacher and call out letters to you, and then you be the teacher and let him write over the letters you wrote.

Each time you go out to eat, take a pad and paper and some of those cars.. again have him practice lines with a pencil, crayon and marker.. He can even write his name really big and drive his cars over the letters of his name..

He will catch on.. He sound just fine.. There are always going to be some kids that can do things before your son and other times, he will be the one ahead of others.. Heck our daughter is 20 and she still can hardly throw a ball..

3 moms found this helpful
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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

He might just have no interest.

Or:

How are his FINE motor skills? Throwing a ball with force is not an indication of strong fine motor skills? Can he grasp a pencil, chalk, crayon?

My son never wanted to write, draw, or color. His preschool teacher alerted me that he might have some fine motor deficiencies. She was right! He got OT once a week for about 5-6 months and what a difference!

How is his pincher grip? Does he complain that his hand hurts when he is writing? Can he button, snap, etc? Can he do a maze and stay INSIDE the lanes easily?

Google "fine motor skills" and see if you think it might apply. Our OT was rec'd by our pediatrician and it was fully covered by our health insurance.
If you think it IS fine motor--get him some OT now, before he is in school all day or it will be a lot harder to work it in.

Good luck!

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S.C.

answers from Fort Wayne on

Practice with him at home. Take a piece of paper and write his name at the top in all capital letters. Ask him to trace over your letters. Then ask him to write them below on his own. Watch how he holds the pencil and how he forms his letters. You might also want to try a connect the dots approach. Make the dots very close together and have him connect the dots. When I was teaching my daughter to write, we took it step by step. So, when she made and A, we made the left hand line first, then we moved onto the next and so forth. It took a lot of practice and hard work, but she finally got it.
If you find that either of you are getting frustrated, stop. Come back to it later. It's not necessary that he get it right the first, second, or tenth time. Just practice, practice, practice.

2 moms found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Please remember that forming letters on paper is indeed a skill the hand must learn. As a preschool teacher, I have children write with the hand they instinctively pick up their pencil or crayons with. From your description, he needs lots of practice getting comfortable holding a pencil. One way you can further help him develop the skills to properly hold/use a pencil is to do some Waldorf-based Wet-on-Wet watercolor with an oversize brush. It teaches children how to hold and use writing implements.

Here's a link for that particular activity:
http://simplehomeschool.net/painting-wet-on-wet-waldorf-w...

The focus of the article is more about color, however, the practice of holding the brush properly is intrinsic to the process, which is why I recommend it. And you can make the characters in the "color stories" that you tell become more relatable to your son by having them do things he enjoys. There's a lot of flexibility in this activity if you use your imagination.
My preschool is eclectic and not Waldorf-based, but a good idea is always a good idea. And this is a low-stress, low-pressure activity.

Also know, too, that some children are going to learn this during kindergarten. There's a pretty wide spectrum as to when children learn to do this. I've seen kids older three year olds do this, and then on up to about 5 or so. Some children excel at gross motor activities and just aren't as drawn to fine-motor work, so if this is your son, it makes sense that he's not doing this just yet. I have children in my preschool that are more interested in working fine motor activities, yet are not interested in writing their names.

One last thing: if you can, when you do ask him to try to write his name, let the opportunities be relevant for him. "Signing" Christmas cards to relatives can be a fun way to practice that first letter of his name. Start small, buy some of the larger pencils they make for beginners (or some fat colored pencils) and let him use whichever hand feels best for him. In my opinion, it's important to make the purpose of this work have meaning for our children. Teaching skill without context can be an empty experience, so grab those opportunities when you can. He'll be interested in doing this on his own when it's time for him to be printing with all his big kid friends at school.

Added later: I really liked the skill-building exercises Laurie A. suggested. Laurie, thanks for sharing! (and I am 40 and still am accused of being a lousy pitcher. Ha!)

Best wishes-- and try not to worry!;)
H.

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T.M.

answers from Modesto on

Get a chalkboard for home and start him out "drawing". Teach him to trace the alphabet. You will soon know what hand he prefers to use. What hand does he use a fork and spoon with? Just sounds like you need to spend some one on one time with him and teach him to write. Sometimes we wait too late to do these things. My kids and my grandkids all new how to write their full name when they were two. It's not too late to start showing him how to do it tho, he's still in little sponge stage and they love to learn and get praised for doing things correctly.

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B.R.

answers from Sacramento on

Oh! I so dislike this push to get our kids writing so early, before many of their bodies have had the chance to develop the small motor skills needed for the tasks. But since schools are expecting more earlier these days we must do what we can.
I suggest that you put some salt, sand, cornmeal or similar substance in a pan and let him practice writing with his finger in that. Or make up some homemade playdough and sit with him and show him how to roll out dough ropes and form letters with them... or roll out a flat shape in the playdough and let him use a pencil or other tool to write in the playdough. Often using a different medium for the writing will help the child to develop the skills needed before transferring the skills to pencil and paper.

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S.L.

answers from New York on

My son had trouble learning to write his name at 4.5 and wasn't showing clear signs of being right handed so i read about this... Watch him...does he favor one hand when he holds a cup, draw with crayon, holds a spoon, flushes the toilet, turns the door knob, brushes his teeth. Try to have him draw, paint, use chalk, use a aquadoodle, magna doodle, etc etc. He still has Lots of time to learn it before Kindergarten!

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J.H.

answers from Flagstaff on

Ask his teacher about it. If the teacher sees it as a problem, the school should offer some resource or other type of class to help him learn.

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

I would ask his teachers to work with him on writing his name. He could be ambidextrous where he has the natural tendency to write with his right hand but does many activities with his left. He may be facing some confusion on what feels natural if you've only wanted to let him write with his left hand. I would encourage the teachers to have some 1:1 time with him to see what he does about writing his name.

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