Son Refuses to Poop in the Potty

I have tried to get my son on to poop on the potty and sometimes he goes and sometimes he doesn't, going pee is not an issue at all. Just last week, 3 days in a row he told me he had to poop and we went to the potty...but now he just goes in his pull-ups, big boy pants or on the floor. So I bought him this book called "once upon a potty" he really likes it and he knows that he has to go on the potty. He is starting to understand. So hopefully within the next week or so it won't be a problem anymore. But I ask him all day long, if he has to go to the bathroom, it's a little repetitive but I think it's working! Good Luck.

My son wouldn't poop on the potty either, he was about 3 1/2 till he finally started going poop on the potty. I thought he would never go myself all my family and friends told me not to worry because he will once hes ready and finally one day he started going. You can try all sorts of things as i see you have done but when hes ready he will.

Like many, I had a similar experience with my daughter. Someone recommended the "Once Upon a Potty" book. I suggest the "Once Upon a Potty" video. I borrowed it from our local library several times. My daughter loved seeing the other children and singing the song that comes at the end. That was the magical tool for us. Even after my daughter was trained, she continued to borrow that video.

Hi K.,
Is he wearing pull-ups or underwear? Maybe try underwear--with his favorite characters. He may not like the feel of the poop in the underwear and he may not want to get Thomas, or Lightening McQueen poopy!
With my son, a couple of times, we put him on the potty after he had pooped and kind of..um...knocked it off his bum and into the potty and reacted like he had done it himself. My son also liked to sit backwards on the toilet--I guess he felt more secure. We also sang the "He's a Super Duper Pooper song (appropriately to the tune of Glory Glory Hallelujah!) and danced and marched around (even my 44 yr. old marine corp husband!) That really got him into it and made him want to do it over and over!
Some kids like the security of a small potty chair and I'd suggest putting him on it while reading to him or let him watch a cartoon. Also, my son loved the book Once Upon a Potty for boys as it gave him a better idea of "where" this poop was coming out of. He also wanted to SEE his anus--I guess it makes sense--it might seem like a mysterious thing if you don't know yet!
Good luck--once it clicks, it WILL stick! He will not be pooping his pants at 15!

Check out diaperfreebaby.com and see what they have to say-- it's a really great site but you have to read all the way through before picking and choosing what works for you. Don't be turned off by something odd at the beginning- it's really great. Check it out.

Hi, K.. My son was almost 4 1/2 before he started pooping on the potty regularly. This occurred after I sought advice from a friend. (It turned out her son had gone to a child psychologist for this.) She told me to have my son stand in the bathroom with his pull-up on when he needed to poop, then after a couple of weeks or so sit on the potty with his pull up on, and then after a couple of weeks take off the pull up. Of course, at each stage, he was rewarded using a sticker chart, etc. This worked like a charm. Your son is so young yet, so maybe he's just not ready. Good luck!

he is probably just too young. some girls will be fully potty trained a two but boys generally take longer - its not worth pushing it, just give him time

does he show rituals for when he has bowel movements in his diaper yet? my son used to hide behind chair (he was close to 3 than 2 and 1/2 when this started) - once i noticed that i started catching him and putting him on the potty - this helped him learn that feeling means go to the potty - it created the association -

You did good! Having your child around other children helps to see how other children behave.
Be encouraged in your efforts they are not in vain.

Hang in there, my youngest son, now 4, was the same way. I had him enrolled in preschool and had myself stressing out in the spring and summer that he would NEVER get it! He could not go to preschool unless he was fully potty-trained. I would have been afraid to send him if he was not! He would poop as soon as we put him in his diaper for bed or naptime. He would not even tell us so when we would go in to check on him the room would smell awful, then we had to cahnge him in his sleep! He finally started pooping in the potty, but he was over three; I can't remember exactly when it all came together. We tried all the same tricks you are trying, but to no avail. I would even have him look at toy catalogs and when he found something he wanted I would tell him when he pooped in the potty he could have it. He would point to the writing on the catalog description of the item and tell me some nice story about how "it says this toy is only for a Christmas or birthday gift and not a prize for pooping on the potty..." Too smart, right? Finally one day our older son told him, real casually, that if he pooped on the potty he would go to Toys R Us with us and buy him the prankster cars from the movie CARS with his own money. Hallelejah! It worked! He even told the cashier why we were there!!!!! I would just say stay patient, have other people he loves try things casually and see if he takes the bait. Judging on how old my little guy was you may have year or so wait though. I hope that helps!

My oldest, now 27, would pee in the potty regularly, then stand in a corner and hide while she pooped her pants. It was funny, in a way, cuz we could always tell it was happening, and she wouldn't go in the toilet.

We didn't ask any questions, and I admit to having been frustrated . . . but one day, I saw that she was pushing, and I said to my husband, "Quick! Grab her and put her on the pot !!!" HE did, and he got her there in time for everything to land where it belonged. After that, she never pooped in her pants again.

I don't know what was going on, but I wonder if it had to do with a difference in position and balance or something ? (she was using a regular sized toilet at the time, rather than a potty chair). Whatever the reason was, after she did it successfully that one day, she did it every day.

(not sure if this story helps or now, but whatever . . . )

barb

I can relate to your frustrations. This was typical behavior for all of my four boys. It takes longer for them to be motivated to poop on the potty. They are too busy playing! Try to relax a bit. It will happen. Keep motivating him and praising when he goes. My youngest son was peeing on the potty by age 2 but not fully trained to poop on it until after age 3. Now he is a straight A student and president of his class.

I went through this with my older son, who is now 9. He potty trained to urinate on the toilet, but refused to poop on the potty. It took a good 6 extra months until he was willing and ready to poop on the potty. I have talked to other parents who also went through this with their children. Just keep trying and when he is ready, it will be easy. Don't stress yourself or him too much about this. I know that it is frustrating - my son used to poop in his underwear or even ask for a diaper to poop. But, he eventually did get it and went on the toilet. Good luck!

Hi K.,
I had the same problem, my son would pee but would say he was afraid to go poop. So I just tried to explain that everyone goes on the potty and it would be ok, without forcing him or getting mad. The only thing that really seemed to encourage him was when I asked "Is today the day you will poop on the potty?" I think because he likes looking forward to things and kids naturally want to please. It actually took 6 months before he did it....at age 3 1/2. I think they will do it in their own time...but it's hard to be patient!

hi! i would let it go.. he's trying really hard to tell you he's just not ready yet. the more attention you put on his not being ready the longer it may take. some boys do take much much longer to train. never make him feel badly for going where he goes, and let him wear pull ups again for the poo, but encourage him to go pee, if that seems to be okay with him. also, after he goes poo in the pull up, show him, nicely, positively, where it goes, in the toilet. you can let him flush it and say bye bye poo. make it fun, not pressured, just funny and fun. good luck. it's okay and good that he is trying to tell you he's not ready yet.
E.

Dear K.

Both my children hated the potty and so i never used one. From day one i got an attachment for the actual toilet which had steps and then a seat that made it possible for the little ones to sit secuarly on the toilet. Perhaps if you tried this route he may respone better. I hope this helps. Good luck

Hi K.!
Do not push the pooping on the potty issue. My 3 year old daughter stopped pooping when we potty trained because she is afraid of it. She wound up with a blockage and is now on a laxative daily. Her intestines stretched so much from holding it back. (She would go up to 5 days without going before I would give her a suppository or an enema.) While it is a really gross issue, I have just left it go and when she goes in her panties I put it in the potty and let her flush it. Just recently she has started going now as she has had some successful tries. I do let her ask for a pull-up if she has to poop as well as an alternative. It is important to encourage him to go no matter where. He will get it in his own time and it is frustrating. Just hang in there and don't let it go to the medical issues that I am dealing with. They are much worse than poop on your floor!

Good luck.

All I can really say is patience. My niece would do the same thing no matter what the bribe. It did take a long time but a few weeks short of her 3rd birthday she just started doing it on her own and we all made such a big big deal out of it so she would want to do it again(but there were times in between that she would go in her pants too). I would keep introducing it to him but not to the point that he will get really upset.

When he does have a bowel movement in his underwear or his diaper, how do you dispose of it? You should be flushing it down the toilet every time so he can see that is where it goes.
Hopefully that will help. Also, from what I've heard boys are harder to pottytrain than girls. Both of my boys were fully pottytrained one week before their 3rd birthdays. So, your son is still young. I wouldn't worry about it.....try not to make it an issue. I would stick with the rewards when he does a good job, but other than that....leave it alone.
Best of luck to you.

My daughter took awhile to go poop in the potty. She wasn't patient enough to sit there for the time it took. she could poop in her diaper or pants while she was running around and playing. so i'd play with her while she was sitting on the potty. we'd read several book and play games until she pooped.

We had tons of struggles with my daughter and still do with potty training. SHe was also very constipated which didn't help. My pediatrician suggested the "magic pullup". Start him out by pooping in the bathroom even if not on the potty, then try sitting on the potty in a pullup so he feels comfortable, then cut a hole in the back of the pullup so the poop falls out of the magic pullup and into the potty, then move away from the pullup. It helped us and I hope it helps you.

All I can tell you is be patient. Keep up with the "drill". If you keep at it, he will eventually go. I learned that the hard way, my son is 5 now, but he didn't really get totally potty trained until he was almost 4 (just in time for preschool). I let myself get so frustrated with him and one day he just started going. They will not poop in their pants forever. I'm now starting with my other son, he is 3. He has been peeing in the potty since about 2 1/2, but I can't get him to sit long enough to poop. I recently started having him wear underwear & he loves them. I don't think it will be long, I have to force him to wear his diaper at night. Yes, we have a few messes sometimes, but nothing I can't clean up. I guess that's life, ha!
Hope this helped in some way. I guess patience and persitance is the best answer with "Potty Training" - especially with BOYS!!