Son "Holding It"

Updated on July 26, 2010
A.H. asks from Saint Paul, MN
8 answers

My 21 month old son hates to poop. He hates it so much, in fact, that he will hold it until it's impossible to hold it anymore, sometimes up to 2 days. When he finally goes, it is large and hard and it hurts. We know when he's doing it. His face gets all red, he arches his back, and he sqeezes his legs together. When we ask if he has to go potty, he says no, while tying not to grimace from the work of holding it in! He eats well - lots of fruit and veggies. We also give him some prune juice once a day mixed with some apple juice (to help with the taste). Does anyone else have any other suggestions as to how to stop him from holding it?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Columbus on

Don't ask, tell. You know he needs to go, so take him to the bathroom. One thing I have learnd with my kids over the last 18 year is, don't ask them any questions when you already know the answer and give them the chance to lie too. Hard to do, but a lesson worth learning.

M.

1 mom found this helpful

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

You may have to try Miralax for a while... talk to your doctor. The reason they get scared is because the colon actually removes water from the stool the longer they hold it... so painful large stools... The kid remembers this and then they are afraid to poop. The Miralax keeps the stool soft so they eventually get over the fear and can resume normal BM's. THis is what worked for my niece. My daughter did okay with straight up apple juice a few times a day. Some people worry about the sugar but it was better than the hard stools for us.

Y.C.

answers from New York on

-Keep telling him that the reason why his poop is hard and hurt is because he is holding in. If he try to poop more often will be softer and easy.
-Buy him the book "Everyone poops" and read it with him.
-Keep giving him different fruits and veggies with lots of insoluble fiber (whole wheat, wheat bran, vegetables such as cauliflower and green beans and the skins of fruits and root vegetables)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

I too agree with Miralax. Our son was having the same problem and a pediatrician told us to try it. We still use it off and on a year later. You can buy it over the counter and it has no taste, you can even put it in water. The hard, large poops are so painful looking, I don't blame kids for not wanting to go. Also look on line for foods to avoid. Some juices along with friuts and veggies are not good to give in this situation.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

This is a condition called encopresis. If you look it up online, you'll get a lot more information about it. Our son has had it off and on for years.

The key thing is getting him to go at the same time each day. Incorporate it into your routine. Our son goes before his bath every night. We tried all of the treatments -- laxatives, mineral oil, suppositories, fiber supplements. Nothing worked until we gave him a big bribe (money) to go. Then we got him on a schedule and that's what really worked. Then it no longer hurt and the fear was gone. But it took a big bribe at first to get him to go. He could hold it for four or five days before. It was awful.

I would talk to your son's pediatrician for advice on encopresis. Doctors usually have a preferred plan for dealing with it.

Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.B.

answers from Milwaukee on

Miralax. Use it long enough until he has been having softer, non painful bowel movements for enough time that he forgotten the painful episodes. Once you reach that point, start reducing the amount you give him until he's off it. P.S. You have to experiment on the dosage until you find what is right for him.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.S.

answers from Des Moines on

Miralax, about half the dose for adults once to twice daily. It dissolves in water and is totally tasteless so they'll take it without even knowing. Our daughter used to do the same thing - it was horrible, she was so cranky 'cause she neeed to poop but wouldn't! Miralax softens the stool, it's not a "laxative" so when he goes it will be softer and not painful. She eventually got over her fear of pooping but I still give it to her occasionally when I notice her stools are getting hard of when she eats lots of bananas and cheese :-). It's important to get it under control soon, otherwise it just becomes a terrible cycle. Even after you think you've got it licked, keep with the Miralax occasionally.

And encourage him to "let it out" when you know he needs to poop, and cheer and congratulate him when he does, then talk about how it "didn't hurt that time", to help him get over his fear of the pain. I had to coach our daughter how to "squat and push" instead of holding it in as her habit had become.

they also make "fiber gummies" but that always gave our daughter diarrhea so I stuck with the Miralax

Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Give him a laxative every night so that he will HAVE to poop every morning. Once he's in the habit, maybe he will just do it on his own.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions