Son and Daughter Share a Room?

Updated on January 17, 2011
A.P. asks from Morgantown, WV
15 answers

Hey Everyone! I just want to see what everyones opinions are. We have a 7yr old son, and 3.5 yr old daughter. They love each other and are best of friends. They have always had their own rooms, and would have "camp out's" in my sons room for fun sometimes on weekends. Well, they both are begging to share his room full time, and make my daughters room their play room. Do any of you have your kids share their room at 3.5 years apart, and boy and girl? How does it workout for you? Now I think they'd love it, but I don't know if in a year my son will still want a room with his little sister, and don't know that it's fair to her to make her go back to her own room then. So I just wanted to see what you think :) Thanks!

What can I do next?

  • Add your own comment
  • Ask your own question
  • Join the Mamapedia community
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers



answers from Los Angeles on

My son 8 and daughter 3 share a room - the only thing I have tried to do, is give them a little space of their own - my son has a loft bed, and little sis is not allowed up there, that is his space - the girl doesnt care at the moment about her own space.
once they indicate that they want their own room, we will have to build on - but at the moment they are happy to share.
dressing is no problem, I dress my daughter, as she cant dress herself yet, and my son likes to dress in the living room, and puts a blanket over his nether regions while dressing.

Edit My Answer
2 moms found this helpful

More Answers


answers from Jacksonville on

I wouldn't do it. Continue with letting them have campouts on occasion but don't move her permanently.

Added: I have a boy and girl almost the same age difference as yours. My son is 12 my daughter 9, so 3 years apart. When they begin having friends over and sleep overs with friends... you will be glad you didn't put them in the same room together. Besides, 3 1/2 years is a big age gap for an older son and younger daughter to be sharing sleeping quarters on a daily basis, in my opinion. We did it at almost that same age b/c we were in a temporary residence where we only had 2 bedrooms, and I was glad when it was over. They were great going to bed the first week... after that it was a battle every night the remainder of the time we were there. Once we moved into our house where they have their own rooms, they went right back to going to bed easily. They still will have the occasional "campout", like yours do. They love it. But every night and we would ALL be unhappy.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

I'm with Victoria on this one. Unfortunately, they won't be best friends forever and he'll want his privacy.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Redding on

Let them try it. Down the road, one or the other will likely want their privacy and you can change things back.
My daughter is 10 years older than my son and she loved her little brother staying in her room with her. They had their own rooms, but they liked being together.
I'm thankful for that time.
He was only 8 when she moved out on her own.
He still goes and stays with her at her house every chance they get. I think being close is good.

I wouldn't worry too much about this. Like I said, there will come a time when they want their own rooms and they will be happy for you to deal with it then.

Best wishes.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

my son is 7 and my daughter is 5, they share a room. i cant imagine how its going to go when i split them up, i really have no idea. they fight all the time, but they also need each other. sheesh, they are like a disfunctional couple. anyway, they are both lousy at going to bed. michael ends up in my bed most nights. but they sleep once they get to sleep. this is easily the most i have slept in 8 years...... my baby is still in a crib, and he is 3.5! all i know is he hugs me and kisses me and tells me he loves me and he lays down and goes to sleep till morning. its a beautiful thing, i never had this. so im not messing with it. he can stay in that crib till hes 18! haha.... anyway, i know the other 2 would fight like this whether they have their own rooms or not. i just wonder whether they will like it or not. well, when tyler has had enough of the crib, ill find out. meanwhile im sticking. my advice is to give it a shot and be flexible. dont do anything too permanent. my youngest 2 get along like a dream, and i can just sit and watch them, its so great. i will be devastated if they lose that. i would build on it.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

My son is 8 and my daughter is 6 and they share a room. About six months ago, they decided not to change clothes in front of each other. They have been pretty good about shutting the door to the bedroom and changing one at a time. That has really been our only issue. Neither has asked to not "live" together, and they do not seem to mind sharing the room even though they are boy/girl. They also begged to move into together, it has been about three years since they began sharing a room.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Modesto on

His friends might make fun of him for sharing with his sis....that would be the only real draw back I can see.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

My 7 yr old son and 5.75 yr old daughter share a room too. We have them share a room due to space. When we purchased our home we were on the 5 year plan. The 5 years went to 13 years. Now, if you watch the news the real-estate market is ghastly. I've always said that if we had a 10 bedroom house that we would have them share for a little while.
They fight like an old married couple, but have such a special bond that I envy. Do what feels right and look at it that it’s not permanent. Do you ever have anyone give you a hard time about them sharing a room? I have, and I was wondering if we are the only ones. I look at it that we can pay our bills, live in a great neighborhood, and they go to a top rated school.

Good Luck with your choice.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Wichita on

I can see doing it for awhile. My brother and I (we were only 1 year apart) shared a room until about 10 or 11, then we switched up with our younger brother and sister. It was easier on my mom to have the 2 older and 2 younger stay together and it didnt really bother us for quite awhile.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

If you are willing to do a trial run, and willing to switch back furniture if you aren't happy with it, go for it. Plenty of boy/girl siblings of all ages share rooms. If you feel like you want to let them have their campouts and give it a little more time (to see if their interest wanes) that's okay too.

Something to consider: when big brother had a buddy over for a playdate, is he going to want to have his own space, or will it be okay to share the playroom and bedroom with little sister too? That is something he might be able to give you his feelings/feedback on, and check back with him in a day or two after asking to see if any other ideas/feelings come up for him. Usually, it's the older sibling who is more attached to the idea of their own space.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

My 10 yo granddaughter and 7 you grandson have shared a room for several years so that the other bedroom could be a playroom. This hasn't worked so well recently because my daughter married and they turned the spare bedroom into an office. Also my granddaughter is of an age that she needs more privacy. They're going to turn the office back into a bedroom so each can have there own room.

I'd let them share. They can always change back. I wouldn't be concerned about how your daughter might feel when he wants his own room. By then she might also want her own room. One day at a time is my motto. Do what works for now.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Allentown on

My kids are a bit over 2 and a half years apart. Daughter is 6 soon, son just turned 3, and they share a room, we only have 2 bedrooms. I think it has been great for them to share. They get along well, learn to respect each others things, and share a space. I think it is fine if they want to, and since you have another room, you could always go back to separate rooms if they decide later. I know someday they will need their own rooms but for now it is just fine.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Charlotte on

I think it will work for a couple of years, and then your son will want his own room, just like you said. Keep their rooms separate, especially since they are different genders.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Philadelphia on

I know it's different in the U.S. but I've lived abroad in a few different countries, and basically, it's completely normal for siblings (of both sexes) and even parents and children to share rooms. I think it's like this in most other parts of the world. Humans definitely prefer companionship to solitude, especially children. I think if they are eager to share, that's wonderful! Go for it!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Harrisburg on

Just some random thoughts...

Do they go to bed at the same time? My kids are about 3 years apart and older one has always had a later bed-time. He would resent having to go to bed as early as the younger one.

Do your kids have friends over for sleepovers? This would make it awkward or difficult.

Does your son do homework in his bedroom? (Or will he in the near future if not now?) He will need a quiet spot to do homework, and that would be difficult if sharing a room with a younger sibling.

I wouldn't worry about separating them later if you put them together now. Life is full of changes....

Our kids are nearly 3 years apart and are great friends, and had many "sleepovers" in each other's rooms when they were younger, but also liked their own space.

There's nothing really wrong with are the one who knows your kids best. What do THEY want to do? I'd ask the older one first...figuring if anyone needs their own space, it would be the older one.

I probably wouldn't do it during the school year, but would let them do so if they wanted to in the summer.

1 mom found this helpful

Next question: Kids Sharing Rooms