Updated on May 03, 2012
J.M. asks from Fox River Grove, IL
17 answers

My daughter wants to have her first slumber party for her 7th birthday. I am wondering if any kids parents will even be ok with sleeping over somewhere at this young of an age. I was thinking of doing a pajama party/sleep over, so that the kids who did not feel comfortable sleeping over didn't have to... what do you mamas think?

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answers from Dallas on

My boys started sleeping over at friends' houses at about that age, but only at homes where I knew the parents well. I think the option of not spending the night is a good idea.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

I think it's a great idea. I bet some of the moms will be okay with it after they've spoken to you on the phone or dropped by for a minute to meet you. I've had parents do that - just drop in to introduce themselves and kind of just see the environment. You can tell a little bit about people by the way they keep their house. I'm not talking about toys be out or just everyday mess, I'm talking about filth. Do the pajama party/sleep over so those who want to and have permission to can stay.

P.S. You're probably going to need a bottle of wine and some ear plugs!
Have fun!

1 mom found this helpful

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answers from Chicago on

Sleepovers for my daughter and friends started in 1st grade, which is when kids were turning 6.

I think the idea of giving the option is good. Then a kid won't feel singled out if their mom won't let them. But in 4 years of many sleepovers (both hosted by me and that my daughter attended) there were only maybe 1 or 2 kids whose mom wouldn't let them. The rest were fine.

The other thing I saw a lot of..... invitations SPECIFIED to bring a stuffed animal - they all got party hats. That way if a kid sleeps with a stuffed animal they wouldn't feel weird about bringing one.

Sleepovers are very easy to do..... limit the # of girls, show PG movies, order pizza and have mini- bottles of water and popcorn.

have fun.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Philadelphia on

i think it would be fun and im sure the kids parents would be fine with it as it would give them a night off but make sure you have all the parents numbers just in case a child gets scared and wants to go home.
Also make sure you make it fun and dont push the sleeping as they will just want to have fun and giggle and talk all night.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Dallas on

If I knew you really well, I would let my son. If I didn't know you, I wouldn't consider it.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Honolulu on

When my daughter was turning 8, she had a sleep over b-day party.
It consisted of just her closest friends. 4-5 other girls. However, we know her friends and their families very well. And they know us very well. Their kids come over all the time, for play dates.
So it was fine.
And sure, if a child cannot sleep over, then you just tell the parents that they can pick up their child after say, the cake and opening of gifts. Then they can go home.
That's fine.

The thing is: per making your decision, it would be much clearer... if you and your daughter's friends, already know you very well and you of their Mom or family. Or that your daughter's friends, have already been over to your home before.
But if you don't feel comfortable at all, with a sleep over, then as the Mom you need to tell your Daughter, and come up with another type of party.

My daughter and her friends all slept in the living room. In their sleeping bags. Staying up till late chatting. It was fine with the other Moms too.

1 mom found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

Some kids do it at that age. We didn't really start until around 9 or 10.
Whatever you do, keep the party small, like 5 girls or less. At that age they are NOTORIOUSLY full of drama. Someone will feel left out, someone will be mean, someone will cry, someone will miss their mom and need to be picked up at 3 am, and as the birthday girl your poor daughter will likely feel very overwhelmed.
Just trying to prepare you for the inevitable. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Minneapolis on

My daughter had a sleepover birthday party for her 7th or 8th (not even sure now which one!) Our daughter had slept over with close friends since she was about five. All of the girls she invited had already been doing sleepovers, also. Aim for an even number of girls, and not too many 4 or 6 total counting your daughter. Even numbers seem to help with the possiblity of drama over being left out!

I talked with each of the parents ahead of time to let them know the dropoff and pick up times, what they should bring, and let them know that both of us - Dad and Mom - would be present the whole time. I made sure they had our phone number and we had theirs.

All it took was some dinner, cake, snacks for later, a space to put down their sleeping bags, and a movie or two. We had no issues at all. They found plenty to do and giggled alot! They all had fun, we didn't get a lot of sleep! and they made memories.



answers from Minneapolis on

It will depend on the parents and the kids. That's too young for me. When my kids were invited to sleepover parties at that age I let them stay until about 10:00 or so and then I told my son and the parents that I would be picking him up. My youngest had his first sleepover (other than with grandparents, aunts and uncles) at age 7, but it was just him at a friend's house and my oldest didn't have his first sleepover until he was 9 because he had asthma and night terrors. My oldest didn't have his first sleepover party at our house until he was 12 and my youngest was 10 (you can see a pattern here). I personally am not a fan of sleepovers and sleepover parties, but I realize they are a part of childhood. I would keep it small and provide the option of an evening pick-up time for the kids and/or parents who don't feel comfortable with a sleepover. Looks like you already thought of that--yes, the option you've described would be a good idea.



answers from Atlanta on

That sounds like the perfect sleepover age! I'm amazed that people make their kids wait these days until they're so much older. I've honestly never heard of that before! I'm in my 40s, and I started going to and having sleepovers and slumber parties in kindergarten. I had one for my birthday in first grade with 8 other first grade girls and went to 3 more that year.

My oldest son is 6 and in kindergarten and has been going to a friend's house and he's been coming over here for sleepovers since they were 4. Now he's going to sleepovers elsewhere too. I always speak to the parent or parents if I don't already know them well. Give the option if you want, but I certainly think 7 is a good age for it!



answers from Washington DC on

Honestly, I think 7 is too young. I know some kids do this, but there's a lot of kids that are still pretty needy at that age.

My dd is 8 and I won't do a slumber party until she's 10 or 11 when the kids are more independent.



answers from Los Angeles on

You'd be surprised! My oldest daughter hosted her first sleepover in kindergarten. And, only one child didn't stay.

But, she had friends all the way thru high school who were never allowed to go to a sleepover.

So, I don't think it's so much about the age/grade, although they may get more comfortable with the idea as they get older; but it's more about the parents.



answers from Los Angeles on

I would just do a pajama party from 7 to 10pm.


answers from St. Louis on

I think this is a great idea and giving the option of sleeping over or pickup at say 10pm is great because then if parents are wary (because of the age or they do not know you) they do not have to explain why they aren't sleeping over. I saw a really cute article (maybe in Parents magazine) a few years ago and there were these really cute snacks (maybe cupcakes or something) that looked like girls sleeping on sleeping bags (made with fondant) - so you could maybe get the stuff to have the girls make 'sleeping bag' rice krispie treats (rectangle sleeping bags, icing for blankets and let them decorate them) and then also maybe do sock 'slippers' for a fun craft (have them put different colored dots on the bottom to prevent slipping). do this early in the evening so it has time to dry before they leave in the morning (I'd say those who aren't staying will need to leave theirs overnight). I hope my daughter wants to do this sort of party when she's older!!!



answers from Dallas on

Some parents will and some wont. Sometimes it depends on how well they know the parents. My son just spent the night at his friends house for the first time this year and he's 13. And the little one has only slept over at non family members houses when I was in the hospital and he had to to get to school.

So letting them know they can still come and have fun even without staying is a great idea.



answers from New York on

In my home, no sleep overs outside of the home until 10 years old. I make it a really big deal. Perhaps a pajama themed party would be fun and making it later in the day would also be fun too but it could also come with some overly tired and cranky guests.

Family however is welcomed to sleep over at any age but again my kids didn't spend the night out until they were 10. It served as a right of passage for turning double digits.



answers from Philadelphia on

I think that is a perfect age! My 7 year old loves sleepovers :)

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