Sleep Sacks Yes or No

Updated on September 20, 2019
M.P. asks from Mount Laurel, NJ
15 answers

I’m a Grandma to a 8 month old granddaughter. She crawls and pulls herself up on the side of the crib. My daughter has used a sleep sack after she outgrew the swaddle. I’m from old school we didn’t have sleep sacks back in the day when I had my children in the 80’s. Now that my grand baby crawls and stands up I feel the sleep sack is confining and could pose a hazard to her trying to stand up and her little feet stands in the sleep sack and won’t allow her to stand or she may even fall and hit her head on the bars in the crib. I would not like my legs confined like this. That’s all I think when I see these and how it prohibits her from some movement. I understand the purpose of them for warmth vs not using a blanket. But at what age should you stop using them.
Obviously they make them for babies as they grow and get bigger. But I am not a fan after a baby is mobile to use sleep sacks.
Can I have your thoughts on this please. It’s really upsetting to me.
Oh and I did suggest she buy ones with holes for the legs but she won’t hear of it. Why? Have no idea. With my daughter it’s her way or the highway. Thank you.

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answers from New York on

Blanket sleepers. The one piece pjs. Carters sells them, along with Kohl’s, Target etc. my kids slept in cooler rooms so I put light pjs on and blanket sleeper over them. Stayed warm all night.

2 moms found this helpful

More Answers


answers from Santa Fe on

I suggest you don't worry about it. You had your turn to be a parent and now it is your daughter's turn. She can make different decisions than you would and it's ok! My kids both used sleep sacks for a while when they were babies because they would get cold in the night. A sleep sack is it doesn't bunch up or come off the baby in the night. PS - You sound really disrespectful of your daughter. Yes, it IS "her way or the highway". This is her child. Stop trying to impose your opinions on her. It will be fine Grandma. You are thinking about this way too much - let it go.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from San Francisco on

My younger cousin used these for her babies and she loved them. As far as your grandbaby falling and hitting her head on the slats of the crib? Well, newly standing babies do that all the time, sleep sack or not, so that's not really a reason to be upset. Let it go.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Minneapolis on

Grandma, let this one go. Your daughter is the parent and she gets to make these kind of choices.

6 moms found this helpful


answers from Norfolk on

When we raised our kids we called the shots.
Things change every few years and by the time we have grand kids what we use to do is no longer what is done anymore.
Sorry it's really upsetting you but you need to let it go.
Don't offer advice unless your daughter asks for it.
Sleep sacks are fine.
If you and your daughter are butting heads over your grandchild you need to disengage a bit.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Anchorage on

I work at a child development center in the infant room caring for babies aged 6 wks to 12 months. We use sleep sacks on the smaller babies because they like the extra warmth and it helps with the startle reflex that many young babies have that wakes them often. We stop using them usually around 6 months because by that point the infant is no longer startling awake. We only use them when the infants are sleeping, never when awake, because they will hinder free movement and discourage the infant from moving in the ways that are necessary for skill develpment. But in the end she is the mother and you can not force her, if she thinks you are trying to interfere with her parenting you might very well lose access to your grandchild.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Miami on

Grandma, let it go. This is the baby’s mom’s domain. Not yours. If you want to have unfettered access to that child, you will ignore stuff like this.

5 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

I used sleep sacks till my kids turned 2 and transitioned to toddler beds. If I didn't use one they could climb out of the crib and I am sure falling over the side of a crib is worse than tripping and landing on the mattress. Yeah they might of bonked their head. But I preferred that to them landing on it and breaking their neck climbing out

5 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

I'm a grandmother to five children. With the first one, I had a rocky relationship because I believed I needed to help her learn how to parent. By the time the next one was born, I learned to just listen when she talked and to never give advise unless she asked for it.

Parenting now is much different than parenting when we were young parents. As you said, we didn't have sleep sacks. The last 4 babies wore sleep sacks. I don't agree that wearing them is dangerous. Actually a sleep sack makes it near impossible to climb out of bed. Babies will often bump their heads whether or not they're in a sleep sack. Falling is expected as a baby moves around. Babies learn how to roll over in a a sleep sack. They eventually learn how to get out of sleep sack. Being in a sleep sack is no more dangerous than wearing footed sleep wear.

I, too, expected my daughter to do the things I did. What helped me was to read about parenting in the 20th century.

The first thing I was curious about was having baby in footed garments when they were young. I grew up with babies who actually wore night gowns. They had a drawer string on the bottom. You could put a water proof pad under the baby inside the gown thus keeping them dry if diapers leaked. When they were older babies wore all in ones.

When my daughter was a baby baby swings were ok. Recently safety is more a concern. Cribs didn't have safety features 30 years ago. Bassinets were common. Not so much now. Actually parents have many more things available to help parents. The sleep sack is one.

Sounds like this is your first grandchild. With my first, I felt responsible to teach my daughter about being a parent. I wasn't. I was responsible to let my daughter make decisions about parenting. I was responsible to develop a strong relationship with my daughter as an adult. My teaching days were over. I could be a resource if my daughter asked for help. She was now the responsible parent. She learned without me second guessing her.

Can you remember what it was like to have someone tell you what you should and should not do when your daughter was a baby? My mom had difficulty getting along with my grandmother. I remember standing in the crib crying while they argued. My parents moved to another state before their second baby was born. I think wanting to be independent was one reason for their move.

I urge you to relax and enjoy being a grandmother. Grandmothers have a special role. We are not responsible for parenting. We can just play with our grandchildren. Most decisions are not ours. Respecting the boundaries that our children set is important. Some parents are more strict than others. We adjust to their boundaries. If they say no candy we don't routinely give candy. That sort of thing. When I backed away from criticism my daughter began to trust me. She gradually stopped requiring that I do things her way. We just develop a different relationship with our grown children.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on


If your granddaughter is in YOUR care during the day? then you do what is right for YOU IN YOUR HOME.

However, if you are on the side-lines and making complaints about the sleep sack? I would tell you to back off and let her parent her child. This is what causes so many breaks in family units now. I get where you are coming from. You are concerned about your grandchild.

here's what I found...

if you can come up with something to show your daughter where your concerns are coming from? Then do it. Otherwise. Don't tell her how to raise her child. If she ASKS for your opinion and your input - then by all means - give her your opinion. But don't parent her right now. Let her learn on her own.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from Chicago on

It's her baby. Let it be her way.

4 moms found this helpful


answers from New York on

Let it be “her way” - or you’ll find yourself out on the cold “highway” of nagging mothers/mothers-in-law who rarely get to see their grandchildren because mom is tired of the nagging!

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Portland on

We used them. My kids were never injured. They kept them warm.

ETA - we did have the kind with feet (and they folded over during night like little slippers to keep their feet warm) after a certain point/size. I can't remember when. There's a natural transition. I don't remember overthinking this - it just made sense.

For us it was more mine would kick off their blankets and get cold during the night. I found them handy. As soon as mine could stay tucked in or pull up their blankets (it gets cold here), we didn't use any more.

3 moms found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

don't have strong opinions either way on sleep sacks, but it sounds as if your daughter has inherited your overwhelming need to have things your way and your way only.

guess what? your turn is over. your kids are raised. now your daughter gets to pick the rules for raising hers.

i suggest you learn how to accede gracefully, even to things that are 'really upsetting to you' (and this is pretty minor for such an over the top reaction) or you're going to get benched.


1 mom found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

I definitely agree with you, but maybe mom isn’t ready for baby to grow up? And unfortunately we don’t get to make the decisions any more. Maybe just buy one for early walkers and gift it to her and tell her it is there when both of them are ready for the change.

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