Sleep Deprived baby....and Mom

Updated on November 04, 2015
A.L. asks from Spring, TX
12 answers

I posted a while back about my 3 month old waking up periodically in the night. It's been over 2 weeks now and she's still not sleeping much, maybe 3-4 hours at a time and only 45-1 hour during the day. I know she is super tired! She does have reflux and she is on Prevacid and we just started 1tbs. of rice cereal in her bottle 2x per day. I bought a wedge today for her bed to see if that helps her get some sleep. In the meantime I cannot get any sleep. She wakes up about every 30-45 min and stiffens up her body and just frets. If I leave her there, she just goes into an all out scream. I have tried picking her up and rocking her, letting her cry it out and just going in and trying to soothe her back to sleep but nothing works. She has always been such a pleasant baby now she is always upset and won't even play. Any suggestions??

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S.R.

answers from Beaumont on

I had a similar problem with my now 12 mos old. I started putting Mylicon in her bottle. The pedi suggested she could be getting gas. Within two days she began sleeping through the night.

The cereal in the bottle is weird though. My pedi said NEVER to do that..even suggested not starting solids until four mos. She might need more frequent feedings during the day. I tapered back the number of ounces per feeding and increased the number of feedings. Worked like a charm.

What also saved me was "Happiest Baby on the Block" and "Baby Wise". They both STRESSED the importance of a strict schedule. My dtr is still on a strict schedule, so there are no surprises for her or me!

Hope this helps, hope you both get some sleep.

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T.A.

answers from Houston on

My sleep bible was a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child." As a working mom of two kids, it was my saving grace. I highly recommend it. Good luck.

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A.J.

answers from Killeen on

here's my list of ideas, not sure if you've thought of them or not, but it's worth a shot!
will she sleep in a car seat or baby swing? my kids liked that as babies b/c they both had reflux and the reclining position was better for them, i just made sure they were able to stretch out a lot during the day
will she take a pacifier? i know a lot of moms don't want to get them hooked but they can be a life-saver! my 2nd daughter would wake frequently when she was very young and i would just have to pop the pacifier back in her mouth and she'd fall right back asleep. when she was older i used a pacifier clip and she could find it on her own
do you have a sound machine or fan in the room as white noise? maybe she is a light sleeper and wakes as slight noises. both my kids have always slept with small fans in their rooms. i think it helps when they're really young too b/c of all the sounds they hear in the womb
how many times do you feed her during the night? most babies still need at least one or 2 feedings during the night at 3 months, especially if they are breastfed. and with reflux, most doctors will recommend smaller, more frequent feedings. she might just not have a full enough tummy and reflux is worse on an empty tummy
well that's all i can think of right now, i hope i've helped some!

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D.C.

answers from Houston on

A.,
Several thoughts here,...first off, she is only 3 months old, their tummies are about the size of a golf ball, the food doesn't stay in there very long.. it is normal for them to want to eat in the night for some time, they are supposed to be putting on weight and growing; and it is just the countries like the US where people try to make babies conform to adult schedules rather than the other way around. Babies who experience hunger pains can certainly scream and stiffen, and as babies have little periods of growth they will need and want to eat more often. Sometimes because of distance to the babies room, by the time you hear the baby enough, and get there, the baby is in full scale hunger pain crying and once the cycles get going it is sometimes hard to get them to stop. Think about when you cry, you know, sometimes once you start it seems like you just cry about all sorts of stuff and it is hard to stop.

Babies have needs for feeling the human body, feeling the warmth and hearing heartbeat and breathing. I don't know about you, but I am not real gung ho on sleeping alone and I am in my 50's, why do we think tiny little babies want to be left to comfort themselves. Have you tried things like co- sleeping? I used to fall asleep with my baby on my chest, I didn't sleep that soundly with her in another room (tried that) so thought I might as well sleep lightly with her nearby, where I didn't have to get up all the time and turn on the lights...sometimes if they whimpered I could just place a hand on their back, or pat them a few times and they would drift off again.

If you are afraid to try the baby actually with you, you can buy these co-sleeper beds that go right beside you bed and has one side that opens to your side, it stays open so all you have to do is slide the baby over to you.. you can sleep with your hand on the baby too,so that might be helpful. Most babies are so comforted by being near their mother, you can, if you use formula arrange the makings for bottles that you have ready to quickly put together so when the baby wakes she starts to wimper and you just pour the water into the formula and feed without getting up, turning on lights etc. Everyone gets more sleep that way and it worked wonderfully for my girls. Your baby may need more body time against you, so a sling may help in the daytime. You could wear her for most of the day to help fill her need for your presence. Some babies need to be swaddled to feel more comfortable. As for adding Rice! man I can't believe the pedi suggested that... it is just so counter indicated http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/delay-solids.html
this is a link to a good article about solids and your baby.
It may be that your baby is having difficulty with something in the formula,..have you considered trying to nurse? Hard to argue with the best unadulteraated food there is. Even though you aren't now it does not mean you couldn't. La leche League has information about starting milk again, I am pretty sure.
There are also techiques that can help babies struggling to calm..here is a link to the DVD might be worth a try...
http://www.amazon.com/Happiest-Baby-Block-Crying-Longer/d...

It's called happiest baby on the block..

Hope something in here gives you ideas or hope...

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S.W.

answers from Springfield on

Ultimately, she is suffering from bad gas and colic. I used babies magic tea to soothe my boy when he was behaving the same. It really did work and now a happy healthy boy.

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M.W.

answers from San Antonio on

I'm so sorry you are not sleeping. I hated that time. My husband and I had to go comando on our babies. We have a 5 yr old and an 18 month. Eventually you have to throw the books into the garbage disposal and do what works. My daughter was tough, but what worked best was me getting in the middle of the bed and propping myself up on pillows and letting baby sleep on my chest. You know your baby better than the experts. Both my kids slept on their tummies. The swing worked also. I know a mom who burnt the motor out in her swing. It's war... take no prisoners. You HAVE to sleep, girl!

Good luck

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A.B.

answers from Houston on

How long has she been on Prevacid? That seemed to help my baby sleep better, though never more than 7 hours straight. Also, our doctor said we needed to put her to sleep on her stomach. I was so scared to do this because of SIDS, but he said she would be alot more comfortable, and she was. The good news is they grow out of that reflux. My daughter is six and half months old, and we took her off of Prevacid a few weeks ago, and she is doing better. I hope you find a solution!

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J.F.

answers from Austin on

Hi A.!

I know it is breaking your heart to see her suffer and to be sleep deprived yourself! I went through this phase when my son hit 2 months. It got to the point where I was getting 1-2 hrs of sleep a night!

First, the problem is that she is overtired. She will cry and fret and scream because she's exhausted. I read a book that was recommended to me and it worked within three days! Now my son didn't have reflux, but one pediatrician that I saw tried to put him on medication guessing it was a reflux issue but it wasn't and I knew it. I don't know much about it.

But the book is called On Becoming Babywise...the first book of the series for babies birth to about 1yr. Basically, it talks about putting your baby on a schedule... Eat, awake/play, then sleep. I never thought it would work for me but it did! It's not for everyone so that's a decision for you, but I recommend reading it and then deciding how you feel about it. For me, all of my children will follow this schedule! I hope this helps!

You can contact me if you need too! Now go get some sleep! :)

J.
www.mysilpada.com/J..furse

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M.S.

answers from San Antonio on

Honey, I feel your pain!! My son was not a sleeper at all...he hated being swaddled, woke up 5 or 6 times a night, took 20 to 45 minute naps during the day. He would-not-sleep!!! I was a living zombie. If you are against CIO (cry it out) you might try looking into the following resources, they helped a little as I WAS opposed to CIO...The Happiest Baby on the Block, either the book or DVD, and Elizabeth Pantly's "No Cry Sleep Solution" book.

However; finally, it was reading Dr. Richard Ferber's book on childhood sleep that got me a decent nights sleep. He is the "father" of the CIO method, however unless you read the book you don't really know why you are letting them cry or the proper techniques to use while they are crying. You are not just letting them cry but teaching them to self-sooth.

Anyways, I am sending you a great big hug, because my son was 14 months old before we got it all figured out and I was exhausted...I didn't even want another baby.

But I started Dr. Ferber's techniques much earlier with my daughter and either she is just a naturally good sleeper or he is the "sleep doctor" because she is a great sleeper (knock wood). If you have any questions please ask, because I have sooooo been there...there is an end in sight and sleep in your future.

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S.M.

answers from Austin on

You poor thing! I'd say -- take her back to your doctor and see if something is going on that is hurting her.

Otherwise, I like a lot of these suggestions. I love both Ferber and Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. But, you need to go with whatever works for you. And i would try wearing her around the house during the day to see if it helps her just get more calm -- or try cosleeping if that works for the two of you.

Good luck sweetie!

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L.M.

answers from Corpus Christi on

I would not recommend Babywise. Babies are babies, they do not need a strict schedule or really a schedule at all. If your baby is hungry, feed her/him. I would recommend a sling. It allows you to wear your baby, handsfree. I wouldn't recommend a snugli, those things hurt. Try www.hotslings.com

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S.S.

answers from Houston on

I know this might go against everything written in the books, but have you tried letting her sleep on her tummie? I would try it during the day and see how it goes. We had the same problem with our daughter and she also had reflux. She never slept more than hour during the day unless I was holding her the whole time then she would sleep longer. Everytime I tried to put her down she would wake up. I was also soooo exhausted. One day I decided to try her tummie and she slept for 2 hours. She probably would have slept longer but I kept going and checking to make sure she was still breathing (worried mother) and ended up waking her up. I didn't put her to bed at night on her tummie but I would during the day where I could keep an I on her and get a little rest too. Another idea is the swing. Both of our daughters would sleep for a long time in their swing...was a life saver for my husband !!!

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