Sitter Lost the check..again

Updated on September 08, 2011
A.G. asks from Anthony, NM
43 answers

When I picked my kids up yesterday, my sitter asked if I could write her a check... I was confused since my husband usually gives her one monday morning when he drops off the kids. She said Oh I lost the one he gave me... you can just cancel it and write another. I wasnt too happy about that. This is the 3rd time she has lost a check. I told her that she will have to wait until I pick up the kids today. Since I have to pay the cancelled check fee ( again) should I subtract that amount from her pay? We are on a budget & the $35 cancellation fee means that I wont be able to pay something else. I am really frustrated by this. After today I will not be writing her anymore checks. I am going to ask her for her account info and just start doing a direct deposit into her account.

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So What Happened?

I was worried that I was a jerk for wanting to take the fee out of her check...but I am going to, even if she doesnt like it. She is the one who lost it not me. We are going to start looking for someone else, I have had no other issues with her, but like so many of you pointed out if she lost her paycheck whose to say that she wont lose one of my kids
*Added* I am considering not using her anymore because she doesnt think its a big deal..., she is aware of the fees, we talked about it the first & second times that she lost a check in the same manner, and she didnt wash it, she put it in her pocket and lost it either at walmart or the wic office... I very concered about idently theft and who knows who now has my checking account number.

Featured Answers

B.C.

answers from Dallas on

How annoying! I'd let her know how much that costs and either pay her cash (and get a receipt) or like you said, direct deposit.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

Good Lord, who loses CHECKS? MORE THAN ONE check? Strangest thing! Yeah, let her know about the fee, you can do it apologetically, you know?

Listen, I'm sorry, but everytime we have to cancel a check our bank charges us a $35 fee, things are really tight, we can't afford that fee, so that's why your fee for this week is $35 less then usual.

:(

8 moms found this helpful

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

If she looses the check she should have to pay the cancelled check fee.

6 moms found this helpful

T.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I would take the $35 out of her paycheck. Once understandable, twice not so much, but three times NOPE!

5 moms found this helpful
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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

.

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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

You are smart to cancel the checks and never write her another.
She should credit you 3x35=105 off your bill for the costs.

5 moms found this helpful

L.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Does she know there is a cancelled check fee? I would MAKE SURE that she does know that, and how much it is. You could certainly tell her that you will be deducting that from her pay, but if you didn't specify that up front, it could be an issue. I totally agree, though, that from now on, no more checks. How irresponsible.

5 moms found this helpful

B.F.

answers from Toledo on

I would tell her you are deducting the $35 fee from her check. Once~ fine but 3 time, she should cover that fee. I would also check with your bank before you hand over another one. Just to make sure she didnt already deposit it.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

If she will let you deposit it directly that will be great!
Otherwise I'd mail it to her...that way maybe when she's going through the mail, paying bills, etc., she's more organized.
And YES I would subtract the $35 fee! Have you told her it costs YOU $35 when she loses a check? You need to let her know that right away!

4 moms found this helpful

M.P.

answers from Provo on

TOTALLY charge her!!!! That is ridiculous!!!!!!!!

4 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

I would ask her if she has a paypal account...and deposit the money that way to her...

I too would charge his the cancellation fees - that adds up FAST and shows a lack of organizational skills and responsibility on her part.

I like your idea about auto deposit...that's good too!!

4 moms found this helpful

K.G.

answers from Boca Raton on

3rd time??? ABSOLUTELY deduct the 35 from her paycheck.. If it was the first time, I would let it slide.. By the 3rd time, it's just plain ole' irresponsible!
Ps Are you sure she's responsible enough to watch kids? 3 times is a lot of times to "loose" a check~

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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I would sit down and discuss it and ask to to look hard for it since she'll have to pay the cancelled check fee this time. Tell her the first two times you took care of it, but you can't keep doing this. Not to mention that your name, address, probably phone number, checking acct number and routing number is on that check. I'm pretty sure that's all someone needs to tap into your acct.

I bet she'll find that check once she knows she has to pay for it.

She sounds lazy and if she loses a check, how is she taking care of my children when I'm not looking?

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

I can understand your annoyance. I certainly wouldn't want this to be a habitual problem. I would certainly be concerned by her lack of organization especially when it comes to finances. Ultimatum for her would be this is the last time we will rewrite the check. If you lose it again that's not our problem. Or pay cash on Monday's and get a receipt from her that you paid. Either way she should know better especially by the third time. Also, I agree with the others to deduct cancellation fee. It's her fault not yours.

3 moms found this helpful

A.D.

answers from Norfolk on

i do think you need to charge her for losing the check..but it's kind of overboard to fire her because of it. Losing a check and losing a child are COMPLETELY different things. I lose stuff all the time but have never lost one of my kids--that's kind of an extreme comparison there

3 moms found this helpful

N.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Thats nuts for her to lose the checks like that. I do home daycare and never lost a parent check. Geesh...thats my PAYCHECK! But I have done an auto-deposit system for almost 5 years (a program offered thru my food program and Childcarepay.com). Someone (parent or me) has to pay a $1.00 transaction fee each time, but I have everyone set up to pay 2 weeks at a time (so half the fees per year), and I "eat" the fees (tax deductable at least). I never have to go to the bank anymore, unless its just to get cash for my own needs (like to go to the Farmers Market, etc).

This auto-pay deal is not an option any more at my place (it was the first 2 years). Now its cash or this. No checks.

EDIT note....I have NO ACESS to take more money from these people. We set up a recurring billing cycle, it must be approved by the parents (already approved by me, cuz I set it up)...its a process to set it up. I can never raise their amount without them approving it first, but I can lower it (I get unpaid vacation days, so if I close for a day, I will reduce the next payment cycle by one days pay, put a note on it, etc...but can never raise it that same way without approval process going thru. Its a bit of a PITA to set up with the steps..but worth it!)

For sure make her aware of the fees and set up a different system.

Good luck.

3 moms found this helpful

H.K.

answers from Gainesville on

def. charge her the fees. This is ridiculous! Make sure she knows it is costing you money for her to loose. I never knew there was a check cancellation fee. But of course i havent written checks in awhile, Lol

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

I would sit down with her and discuss this situation. Our company has a policy that if you loose your paycheck you have to pay $10 for a new one. Checks cost money! Let her know you are on a strict budget and everytime she looses a check is costs you $35. She has costed you $105 by loosing her checks. I don't know about you but $105 is a lot of money!!!! Present it to her like that. She should be able to understand. Let her know that you cannot continue to pay that fee and that she will have to start picking up that tab. I bet she doesn't loose another one! If you have a contract with her, request that this be added and initial and date it.

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C.A.

answers from Atlanta on

Well I would assume that "she" assumes you can just write her another check without placing the other check as a stop payment. My bank will do a stop payment for free if it was lost in the mail.....however for something like this -I doubt it but it never hurts to ask. I would indeed put a stop payment on the check for my own protection and I would advise her of this and let her know that its going to cost YOU $35.00 because of HER inability to be organized. To me that just spells unprofessional and would make me question her. I'm sure it "happens" but you said this wasn't the first time so I would be inclined to think she is irresponsible and I would question my children's safety while in her care. "oh sorry I "lost" your child-they were right here a minute ago" It may not characterize her as a provider but I would surely have both eyes open at all times. I would simply inform her of the cost to you and give her the opportunity to find it-if she cannot find it then I would let her know you will be more than happy to write her a new one minus the $35.00 fee.
I know ingdirect has a feature set up to where you can pay person to person. I'm not exactly sure "how" it works because I don't use the feature since it's our emergency fund account but it's my understanding that they send the money to whoever you set up a "payment" with. I'm not sure if that is done with say a check that they cut or if they link it to that person's account to yours??? I think an outside source would be best like paypal or something. I know there were a few other suggestions of some other merchants you could use which doesn't link any accounts to each other. It's something I would check into for sure so that you BOTH can avoid this in the future. It would be beneficial for her as well because then she wouldn't have to worry about cashing the thing to get her money.....I can't believe someone would lose their money.......that's just crazy and a little stupid on her part.

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C.J.

answers from Milwaukee on

Oh HELL no you don't give her a new check. THREE TIMES? I can understand ONCE but THREE? COME ON!

She can LOOK for the check. SHE NEEDS TO TAKE RESPONSIBLITY! Bet she finds that check ASAP!

She wants to get paid she better find a better way of handing her finacial affairs a LOT better! You already held up YOUR side of this arrangement.

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A.B.

answers from Naples on

You should absolutely deduct that from her pay and explain why. She may get mad and quit....or she may learn her lesson and stop losing checks.
You don't say her age, but I know I used to make these kinds of dumb mistakes when I was young and supported by my parents. It wasn't until there were real consequences and I ended up severely inconvenienced, or had to pay money, that I started becoming more responsible.
So anyway, deduct it from her pay and if she wants to keep working for you after that, I would give her one more chance. Then, if she does it again.....well you're going to have to find a new sitter unless you plan to keep dealing with the hassle of writing new checks and paying fees.

3 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I would not give her another check. Or I would take the fee out and not feel bad. Thats insane. She must not want paid if she doesn't find a safe place to put them!

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A.L.

answers from Las Vegas on

or pay her in cash and have her sign off on a receipt (you can buy a pad of those) this way, you have a record of having paid her..

2 moms found this helpful

K.L.

answers from Medford on

Im all for making her pay the fees, but Im also a bit concerned about the direct deposit thing. How long will she work for you, and then youll have to make sure you stop that action right away before any other payments are made to her when she hasnt worked for them. Id tell her you will be charging her the fee this time, making sure she knows how much this cost you in the past and then tell her if it happens again you will not write another check and she will lose the whole ammount of pay. Maybe that big threat will make her realize how foolish and irresponsible she has been.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

Tell her you will write another, but you will have to deduct $ for each time you have to cancel a check due to her negligence. It's the same theory as a bounced check, you have to pay fees for your negligence. Actually, I would deduct $70 for the last two checks, if I'm just being extra generous or I may deduct the whole $105... for the last time as well. Is your sitter a dunce? Does she not realize you have to pay a huge fee, and she has lost 3 checks so far? Next time, pay her in cash, get a cheap receipt book with a carbon copy and record each payment then give her a copy of the receipt. she should be doing this, but I doubt she is.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Good lord. If she lost the check then maybe she lost it or washed it in the washing machine. I say give her fair warning that it costs you $35 and that if it happens again she'll have to pay the fee. If she doesn't want to pay the fee then find someone else.

As for firing her, if she is giving good care to your children then why in the world fire her. If she has only lost the check 3 times in how ever long then give her the benefit of the doubt. Do you know how hard it is to find someone you like and that will take good care of your little ones?

A little piece of paper is much harder to keep up with than a living breathing person.

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A.R.

answers from Milwaukee on

She probably has no idea that there is a fee. Explain this to her and tell her how much it is then ask her to please look for it. Tell her she will get cash from now on(I'd keep receipts). Tell her to check her jean/shorts pockets.

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

We don't but I know a lot of employers charge their employees the cancel check fee if they lose their paycheck. Not that I have set eyeballs on the law but I would take that to mean that is common practice. The other thing is maybe it would teach her to stop losing the darn checks though your direct deposit sounds great too. The only problem with direct deposit is does she have an active bank account. You would be amazed how many people have blown up that option but not maintaining their accounts.

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J.T.

answers from New York on

As people said, this is ridiculous. I'd have charged her the 2nd time!! I may have even charged her the first time! Why should you be out $35 even once bc she lost the check? Her fault so she should pay. And I wouldn't worry about cash or direct deposit. Keep writing her checks and if she loses them, deduct the $35 each time. I bet she gets more organized. If not, I think I'd wonder about her general compentency...

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

It is hard to believe she would lose them like and and just expect you to stop payment. Make sure she is aware there is a fee for stop payment.

If you trust her, don't stop payment and trust that she will tear the other one up is she finds it.

I like the idea of direct deposit, HOWEVER, just so you know... if you have the access to wire money IN to an account, then that person has the info to wire money OUT of your account.

We do wire money and use ACH with some of our customers and we have a completely separate bank account set up for wires and ACH just in case somone were to try to take money from the business account. That account has minimal monies in it on purpose just in case someone is dishonest. Just a little FYI on that.... Also there are fees for wires and ACH. you can do a 3 day ACH for about $3. Same day wires run around $25. Also, the receiving party is also charged a receiving fee around $12.

Maybe a $.79 money order would be more practical? I would NOT give her cash unless she gave me a handwritten receipt of some kind. You need some sort of trace/tracking number with your money for this person.

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M.!.

answers from Phoenix on

Tell her you will be write her a new check, but you be deducting the $35 Stop Payment fee that the bank will charge you OR she can locate the first check she gave you. If she is a good care giver, then don't fire her.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

gosh, yes that would aggrevate me. Get her set up on Direct Deposit and call it a day.
RE: Subtracting the cancellation fee - I'd tell her (if you do continue to use checks) that this is the last time you will cancel a check for her - period.
Of course I'd put it a little nicer - after all she is caring for your children, but once you say it. Put it in writing - have her agree to it and add to your file at her home and you keep a copy too:)
What a hassle!!

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

I'd tell her that you cannot afford the $35 cancelation fee again so you will write her a new check if she'll pay the fee (or give you a credit for the $35). I would not continually rewrite checks for someone. It's her business and she should be more careful. Three times is twice too many. IMO, she owes you $105 for being irresponsible.

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J.K.

answers from Sacramento on

I'd pay her cash from now on.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

We used to do online bill pay for our rent too. And it she lost the check I would take the $35 out of her check. You didn't lose it she did.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

I would not replace the check unless you take the $35 fee out of it. I would not do direct deposit. I would give her cash and make her sign a receipt that you gave it to her. I am betting that she won't loose cash.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

I am an in-home day care provider. I don't loose my paychecks. Those are TOO valuable to me. Oh ya I have an opening coming up in October ;-) I've cared for kids in my home for 6.5 yrs. I'm a mother of 2 children ages 7 and 4. I've worke din our church nursery for the past 15 yrs. I've worked in a day care center with infant, toddler and after school age. I've nannied and babysat... I love kids and want to provide them a safe and fun enviroment where they can have fun, learn and be loved on. Let me know if I can answer any questions you may have.
Thanks,
M.

L._.

answers from San Diego on

I would subtract it from her. It bites, but it's her fault.

M.S.

answers from Omaha on

That's an easy one. You should of course deduct the cost of the cancelled check. Sometimes it's easier to write checks. Let her figure out how to hold on to it. If she loses it again, deduct again. I bet she'll never lose another one. Great lesson here for her : ) I would be giggling as I wrote the check lol.

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A.

answers from Albuquerque on

I would deduct the cancellation fee from the next check. I would not fire her if this is your only complaint. Perhaps she loses checks because she is so involved with taking care of the kids!

Just let her know you are fine either giving her more time to find the check or writing a new one less the fee. If she balks, remind her that lost checks have already cost you $70.

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J.J.

answers from Phoenix on

Does she know how much it costs to cancel a check? Let her know. I'd just pay her cash from now on.

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C.C.

answers from Flagstaff on

Anyone can deposit money into another person's bank account. My renters deposit into my checking account each month. All they need is my name and account number. It would make things much simpler for you. In fact, you could do an online bill pay to her bank from your bank, saving you both the hassle of needing to write a check and deposit it.

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

I would first suggest that she look around her place and double check her purse and car before you rewrite yet another check. I mean, it's only Thursday and she's just figuring out that she lost it so hey, why not have you write a new one? Make her look for it good and proper first. For that matter, I would ask her to look for the other two checks too and emphasize that you're worried about identity theft and that simply canceling the check doesn't fix the problem. It only means that when someone tries to cash it, it'll raise a red flag with the bank and they can track where the check went.

If she makes a good faith effort at looking for the check/s then cancel the check again. And definitely take it out of her pay. She won't lose it again. But if she does... I would let her go. And make her pay for that cancelled check too.

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