Sick Pre-Schooler with Newborn at Home!

Updated on June 05, 2008
J.S. asks from Columbia, MD
19 answers

My 4 year old has a cold- nothing severe but a constant drip, sneezing and some coughing, dry so far thank goodness. I have a newborn who will be 3 weeks on Friday. She now has some nasal congestion so we've been giving her some saline spray and suctioning her a little but it seems to be more in her sinuses and I'm afraid it will develop into a bad cold. She has no fever and neither does my older daughter. Any suggestions for how to best keep germs away from the baby? We're hand cleaning, she's not touching her, and all the basics but I feel like I can't get anyone or anything clean enough. I just didn't think newborns got colds this young, especially when they are also breastfed! Ugghhhh...

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C.P.

answers from Washington DC on

Sounds to me like allergies if the drip is clear. If so keeping the babe clear from it's sibling doesn't matter.

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V.C.

answers from Washington DC on

My infant daughter was sicker in the first year than my first born son - obviously due to exposure to his daycare germs. I beleive breastfeeding kept the symptoms mild - she never ended up with an ear infection or visit to the hospital. For breastfeeding to help, mom should be exposed to the germs so you will produce antibodies to them that will pass in the milk. So don't keep yourself away from your toddler.

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A.F.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi J.! There's really not too much you can do to keep the germs away from the newborn. We had similar issues when I brought my newborn home from the hospital, and my toddler had first roseola, then RSV. We did our best to separate them -- I lived in the bedroom for a few days with the baby, and we used Purell going in and out of the room. My newborn did end up in the hospital, twice, after she caught both things from the toddler, however -- and let me stress this -- my toddler had much more than just a cold. My pedi wasn't at all concerned about basic cold viruses around the newborn.

You are doing all the right things, so just watch your newborn for fever, and try to keep them separated as much as possible. But this is just the beginning of many illnesses they will pass back and forth through the years. Let's hope a cold is the worst it ever gets! As my pedi said when we hospitalized my daughter the first time -- you can't keep all the germs away when you have more than one child, but you can monitor the situation and take care of it as needed. And as a happy side note -- after her hospital stays, my now 7 mo old daughter was actually healthier than her brother throughout the winter season! Knock on wood!

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J.P.

answers from Norfolk on

I had the same issue when my youngest was born. You can never totally get rid of germs so it happens. Luckily you are breast feeding so that cold is being fought double time. Just keep it up. It is aweful to see your baby feeling bad but it is not avoidable, really and it is building up her immune system and making her stronger. (little comfort I know) Good luck to you all.

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C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I hate to tell you this, but you will drive yourself nuts trying to keep the germs away from the newborn. in the end she will probably have less infections than the first born. Just try to go with the flow.

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M.W.

answers from Washington DC on

Yes, newborns get colds. They only get your antibodies from breast feeding, and for viruses the body needs primed cellular immunity. They get that from getting the diseases. Antibodies can't do it all alone, they need the killing cells specific for a disease to finish it off. Having a small child in the house opens toe door to all those germs that you didn't have for the first. But you will not be able to protect the younger from the germs of the older, they are too hard to keep away. Better to see these infections as boosting your baby's immune system, so it will have seen a lot by the time she gets to school. And, it is now believed that keeping babies "too clean" actually leads to allergies, because the immune system is pushed in that direction unless it sees lots of stimulation from infections.

Don't rule out an allergy. If allergies run in your families, then a fetus can form an allergic reaction in the uterus and be born already allergic. Or, because of the extreme pollen season this year, she might have formed an allergy just in this season. If the stuffiness persists, your doctor might want to determine if this is an infection or an allergy.

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S.S.

answers from Norfolk on

I don't have too much more to add than what the others said. I know I was a bit surprised at how many more colds my younger one got from my older one. My boys are 5 years 9 months apart. I was shocked at how many more bumps and scrapes that my younger one gets as well. I had to accept that my older one had all adults to deal with and the younger one he's got a big brother to deal with. :)

D.S.

answers from Allentown on

Hi J.,

Don't worry. Newborns are always stuffy.

You are doing everything that can be done.

Call on the La Leche League and get some support from other mothers coping with what you are.

www.lllusa.org/VA/WebTidewaterVA

or 1-800-525-3243

Hope this helps. D.

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C.M.

answers from Norfolk on

I recently went through cold and flu season with an infant. He's 4 months old and has two brothers 8 and 4. At first I thought he had caught something, but then I realized he was just expelling all the fluids from his birth over a drawn out period of time. What your little one might be expelling may not be the result of any germs. Just a thought.

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J.J.

answers from Washington DC on

After six kids, two grandchildren, and a myriad of other short people with strong wills running through my home, they have all survived and only one has suffered asthma due to allergy. Newborns, especially those breastfed newborns have remarkable recuperative abilities. Unless there are other reasons for concern (asthma, comprised breathing, etc.) I wouldn't worry. Most of my babies had stuff noses at one time or another and they weren't bothered about it. (Okay, I admit that I was a paranoid idiot with the first one - but she survived anyway and is now a 6'1 inch gorgeous 26 year old woman).

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S.M.

answers from Washington DC on

I just went through this over the winter. My daughters are now 4 years and 4 months old respectively. I know it is hard, but I would try not to worry too much. Have all people, not just your older child, wash their hands before touching the baby and after nose wipes and coughs etc. If your older one is feverish or throwing up/diareha, by all means, hands off!! But I wouldn't worry too much, this is just the nature of things with two kids.

Frankly, I worry more about adults - who knows where they have been!!! At least I have some control over my older daughter's hygene and exposure. If there is good handwashing by all, this is the best you can do. My baby has been stuffy on and off since she was born, having inherited colds form her sister. It is very hard to prevent altogether.

Once thing I would be careful of is letting your anxiety spoil the relationship your kids are building or hurting your older child's feelings. I have never told my daughter she couldn't touch the baby. I have said, wash your hands, go blow your nose, cover your mouth, etc. My daughter is very sensitive and she loves her sister so much - just a caution, you don't want the baby to seem like an off-limits thing or more important that your older one. Kids get funny messages sometimes.

Anyway, we have some rules that might help: wash hands when you get home and before and after each meal, after potty, tissues, and coughs/sneezes. At first, my older one had to wash her hands before she touched the baby every time, but I am over that now. I also used hand sanatizer in my purse and stroller, but you have to be careful because of the alcohol content in this - it can dry out hands and is a danger if ingested - you certainly don't want it to get on the baby by accident. Also, some people worry about the overuse of antibacterials. We also started giving my older one a multivitamin since the baby came and she eats probiotics regularly as do I (I'm nursing) to increase everyone's immunity. Good luck - it should help with summer here now!

PS - I have found that the baby's colds have been substantially milder and shorter than mine or my older daughter's. I think this is the benefit of breastfeeding - the baby gets my immunity and it stops the virus from getting stronger.

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R.A.

answers from Norfolk on

Jamie -

Are you sure it's not allergies? Just asking because the symptoms you describe sound very like them.
On the other hand my ex came home with a cold when my daughter was a little over a month and gave it to her it was awful because she was so young but she did survive. I remember the doctor telling me when she was little not to try to shield her from my son and close family members unless they were really sick because they do need to start building immunities but it's still really hard when they do catch something. I'd say it sounds like your doing the best that can be done short of living in a hermetically sealed room ;-) good luck!
And Congratulations on the new little one!
R. A

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O.F.

answers from Roanoke on

I have 3 little ones, 5yr, 33mos, & 13mos. Since my last 2 kids were both preemies we had to be extra careful too! When my oldest would come home from preschool we would change his shirt and wash his hands. If the older one doesn't have a fever then I wouldn't worry too much, but just don't let your older one kiss the newborn until they are all well. Your kids will probably have strong immune systems, my kidos do!!

Good luck!

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C.T.

answers from Washington DC on

It sounds like you are doing all the right things......unfortunately, my 2 yo got my newborn son sick last fall when he was 3 weeks old. Fortunately, his symptoms, nasal congestion, etc were amenable to saline nasal spray and infant prescribed decongestant drops.

Your infant will be exposed to more germs since your son is in school, but continue with the good handwashing techniques, regardless.

Now that my younger son is 8 months old his immune system is really solid.....something I credit to early exposure to an older sibling in school and breastfeeding.

Good luck!

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R.F.

answers from Washington DC on

It sounds more like allergies. The drip causes the cough and the sneezing is normal. Maybe you should talk to the doctor about trying alegra or soemthing like that so see if that helps.

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C.N.

answers from Washington DC on

The moms who mention that the child may be expelling fluid have a good point. I'd not consider it a cold if the fluids are not green. With my baby they were green for at least a day most of the time, so I considered her sick. Here is my experience.
When my third child was born, I was a stay-at-home-mom with two toddlers also at home. My third baby was sick ALL the time beginning at 2 weeks old (it was green for a whole day). She had a cold with congestion ever 2 to 6 weeks until she was 15 months old, and even though I tried to convince pediatricians there was something wrong with her (I saw several), they said that with other little ones in the house, it was not unusual. She was breastfed. I say all that to say that we made it through it, and she never was so seriously sick that it was a medical emergency. Once she got over the hump, she was fine! She just got all her immunities early.
Also, newborns don't have developed sinuses. Those open up later. They are not deep open cavities in their skulls like they are when we get older, so I wouldn't worry about a cold settling up there. What you're seeing is what there is.
As far as keeping germs away, you're doing what you can already. I tried it all. I kept the baby away from any outside contact for a period of 6 weeks after the first few times she was sick, I made the other children wash their hands frequently (and ALWAYS if they had been with other children). I limited their contact with her. She still got sick twice in that 6 weeks even though the older children did not show signs of being sick, so I gave up. Too much trouble if it wasn't going to work. It just made me stressed out, which would just make ME sick eventually. You'll survive, I promise.

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S.C.

answers from Norfolk on

breastfeed, breastfeed, breastfeed as much as she will eat. If se is congested she amy eat more often. Also, breastmilk a few drops in the nose can help loosten congestion and also acts as a topical antibiotic according to Dr. Jay Gordon. I have tried it. It works. Just watch the baby closely. They are more likely to get when they have sibs but also will build strong resistance because they have sibs.

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L.A.

answers from Washington DC on

Hi J.-

There are two things that come to mind, that may be helpful. Vitamin "C" and sunshine. The only vitamin our body does not create is vitamin "C", therefore we have to replenish our supply on a daily basis. Some chewable tablets for you and the four yr. old should cover that, and the baby will get her's through you. Sunshine plays a tremendous role in keeping germs under control, while also supplying much needed nutrients. If the weather has warmed where you are try to make sure you all get about 10-15mins. of sunlight each day.

Hope this helps dry somethings up.

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K.L.

answers from Norfolk on

Yes, unfortunately they do. I bf'd my oldest and she had a cold about every 6wks. The runny nose and teary eyes, and congestion.
You are doing the right things: Just try to keep them away from each other as much as humanly possible. Washing hands. Run an air purifier, cant hurt. And the saline is good. Just be careful not to suck too much out, you dont want to dry out their sinuses. Also, fresh air, get them out of the house. That always works for my kids. If you get a not so warm day you can also open your windows and let your house air out a bit. Then again dont do it when the pollen count is high, God forbid whats they are having is allergies (even tho they say they are too young for allergies) GL.

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