Should I Stay or Should I Go? - Green Bay,WI

I don't have advice much different than other mom's, it is good to call and find out. My son just had his 6th birthday party at a public place and the parents all asked me if it was ok to leave their children with me, I had already arranged to have a friend help me out so I had no problem keeping all of the kids without the parents. All the parties my son has been to the parents request that I just drop him off and picked him back up at the scheduled time!!

Hi J.,
Yes i would call and ask the other mother if it would be alright if you stay there at the party since it is in a public place. Do you know this other mother or her child or for how long?? That might be a help if you knew them..
J.

I would call the mother, that way you can plan for the day. I don't know about you, but when I don't have my children, I like to have a plan to get some things done that I normally can't do when they are around. Staying could be an opportunity to get to know the other parents and perhaps make a new friend for play dates, rides, advice or a couple to go out with!

I'd just call and ask what the parents would prefer. Some mom's would LOVE to have the extra help/supervision of another parent (like me, this will be my first year hosting a non-family-only party) :), other's are "old hats" at birthday parties and things go great. I'd just say you're new at this, do they want some help with the party, or if not, what time should you be back?

Hope your daughter has fun at her first party!

well it is totally up to you. I have been in that same predicament a few times as a matter a fact. If you trust the parents that are giving the party i would go, just play it by ear your mothers intuition will make your decision

If I was in that situation I would either call or when you get there say I'm sorry I'm new to this am I suppose to stay or what time do I come back to pick her up? That way your not imposing. I've had several birthday party's for my daughter where I specifically wrote on the invitations please pick your children up at so and so time. Mostly because for financial reasons I didn't have it in my budget to include parents or siblings. Sometimes the mom may need help also so your best bet is to be upfront and honest in your question. You don't want to be rude and leave your child if she want's you to be there too and since she wasn't specific I would just ask. Birthday parties can be so complicated sometimes. I invited a family with 3 children once and they showed up with the 3 kids plus 4 cousins. I had to tell them it wasn't in my budget to pay for the extra cousins. They were free to stay but would need to pay for themselves.

CALL!! Like others said some parents have it all down to the T as to who is there to supervise. My sister always had all of us come and help out so that the parents could have that time to themselves. simply call and say you were wondering if she needed any help during the party. I am sure she will like offer even if she does not need it and will open the lines of communication for other events in the future.

Not a silly question, a valid one. Have you called to let them know she is going to be there? That would be a good time to ask if they would like you to stay. Otherwise, when you bring her there, ask the parents if they want you to stay to help out. At 5 yo, some parents will leave, some will stay, and most party parents will love the extra help! Also ask your dd what she is comfortable with. If it is her first party, she may want you to stay. It wont be a big deal, I am sure they will be some parents staying and some leaving, so you could do either and no one would think anything of it. If you stay, it is a good way to get to know other parents and the other kids.
S.

Ask the mother. I've been in the same situation. I just asked the mother if she need help with supervision. The mother left it up to me. It was a pool party so I thought it was best for me to stay, as did a lot of the other moms/dads.

a little about me:
SAHM of 2 girls 4 years and 15 months, and one on the way!

Hello, first off don't feel silly about asking this question. I would think that you would need to stay at the birthday party with your child. Only if it said on the invite that it was a drop off party would I stay leave your child there. Just ask the mother if you still are unsure. Good Luck

id prolly hang around shes small still....

Call mother up and ask her. God Bless.

Your best bet would be to call and see what the parent prefers. If she says you can drop your child off then take her and don't leave until your child is comfortable. chances are as soon as she sees the other kids she will forget all about you.

Call and ask.

I know that if I was brave enough to have a 5 year-old's birthday party in a restaurant I would have no problem if any mom's wanted to stay. It's tough to take your own little kids out to eat - can you imagine taking a whole group of them?

Call the Mom. She may appreciate the extra parent hands around. A bunch of 5-year olds can create considerable chaos and havoc, especially in a public place.

I think it depends on your daughter.....some kids are very outgoing in a group atmosphere or she might know a lot of the other kids at the party already. Other kids become very shy in a group that are unfamiliar to them. Just go with her and see how she reacts. And maybe plan on staying a little while if she has difficulty with feeling comfortable and playing with the rest of the group.

~K.

Hi J.,

I own a business that does birthday parties for children and I would say that 80% of parents of 5 year olds drop their kids and go. If it were me, I would probably just ask the mom though. You never know - she might welcome someone offering to stay and give her a hand! It also depends on your child. To some children, attending a birthday party (especially their first) can be a little overwhelming and frightening. I would talk with your daughter about whether she wants you to stay or not. If you do decide to leave, be sure to leave your cell phone number with the mom. That way she can call you if anything comes up. And just explain to her that it's your daugther's first birthday party - believe me, she'll understand!

S. Lawrence
Abrakadoodle

First, it depends on the party place. Am I OK with leaving my child there alone? If I am not then I make an excuse to stay and apoligize. If I'm OK, then I ask my child what they prefer - for me to stay or go. They usually (i have a 4 and 5 year old) say they want me to stay a least for a little bit and they'll tell me when it's OK for me to go.

And, if I stay, I apologize to host mom and give her my reason (my child doesn't want me to leave, my child isn't used to fuddruckers wildness, etc.) and I obviously don't expect any food/drink/cake, and if appropriate I offer to help out.

I have called the mom ahead of time - when the party was in a private house - and asked if it would be OK if I stayed for a bit as my child was abit shy/nervous until my child was settled in.

My son had his first trip to CC with a party. I let the parents of the birthday boy know that I would be brining him and staying with him. We did not expect them to be able to watch all of the children as they played and we were not comfortable with there not a constant eye on him. He still talks about this trip to his little brothers. He was not offended at all that I went. He thought that I was invited too! (I also had our tiny infant with at the time) They actually had so many of the parents tell them they were coming too that they had pizza and drinks for us too. Even without that I still would not have left my son like that. Private home maybe, public place without a constant eye, never. (maybe when he is 16... just kidding)
Good luck!

Hi J.,

When my children were younger, I always stayed during the parties. I found the parents were grateful for the extra help, as I was when I threw parties for my kids. If you do not know the parents well, definitely stay, especially since it is at an eating establishment and much easier to lose track of a child. Besides, it will probably be a lot of fun!

S.

call the mom. at my daughters party a couple of moms stayed and a couple of moms dropped off. my 4 yr old was invited to a pool party and i stayed because she cant swim very well. i asked the mom and she said it was totally fine to stay. when they opened presents and ate i kind of hung back with some other moms. if it is at chucky cheese etc, i think i would still go. public places can get really busy and an extra set of eyes on your child is a good thing. i would hang back to give her space, maybe bring something to read, but just keep an on eye on her. also, it can be a chance to meet the other moms or help the mommie hostess.

I do and believe you should stay with your child 1 do to age and 2 it is b day party not a babysitting session

I would assume it's a drop and you go but I would call. If anything I'm sure she'll appreciate the extra help.

A lot of this has to do with what you feel comfortable with. If you know that your child can easily follow instructions without any problems then leave. However, if you know that your child might need some extra support I would stay. Do what makes you feel the most comfortable.