This is kind of a silly question, one that I need to decide by myself but I've been thinking about it for about a year and can't seem to come to a conclusion! Maybe if I could get your help I can step outside my head for a minute and look at the situation through another viewpoint.
I currently have 2 boys, roughly 3 and 4. They are my joy, as every mom knows. Now, I am undecided if I should try for a 3rd child as I've always wanted a girl. I kind of feel like I'd be less a life experience not having had a little girl to mother. Obviously, you can't really choose the sex of your child, unless you go to extreme measures, such as implantation and I don't think I want to do that.
I've been reading a lot and have found out theories to help with gender selection, such as changing ph balance and timing of intercourse etc., though it's never 100%.
I feel like if I can have a girl, I would do it right away., but don't know if I need to add more testosterone to my family if it ended up a boy! Plus we live in a small 2 bedroom apartment, we'd need to change our lifestyle, (no more personal time that's for sure!) and I'm just starting to be able to have a little more freedom now that the kids are more independent, not to mention that financially it is always more difficult, especially since my husband is basically the sole breadwinner for now.
I feel like I need to decide soon as I don't want to have a huge gap between my kids ages. I know in the long run, even if it were a little boy that I'd love it and probably not ever be able to see my life without him. Still, I am a little hesitant!
Thanks for any advice!!!!
Hi J.,
After having three girls, we had a boy. It has been a wonderful experience mothering both genders. If you want another baby, try for a third. Incidently, the way my children were conceived, each of them SHOULD be the gender they are. Start doing your research online, it is not as difficult to get the gender of child you want as people think it is. Of course, there are never any guarantees, but it worked four times for us!
Good luck!
C.
Make sure you have no regrets!
Good luck,
H.
I have a friend who has 4 boys. She would love a girl but is very happy with her boys! And another who just had her 4th girl 6 months ago. They were hoping for a boy but are happy with their family of girls. Both of them are done having kids now. But neither would give up any of the ones they have!
I have never heard of anyone saying they wish they would NOT have had that last baby. BUT I have many people in my life who wish they would have had at least one more! There are so many people who struggle with fertility and if you are thinking you want another, GO FOR IT! Be thankful that you are able to have another baby.
Have you read, "Taking Charge of Your Fertility"? It explains a way to try to time sex so you have a better chance at having a certain sex.
It comes down to - do you want another child? Boy or girl either way. would be cheaper to add aboy rather than a girl since you already have 2. But you also can't really use finances as a reason otherwise most of us would never have kids.Pray about it and see what GOD wills you.
Go for it. I was in the same boat as you but had two girls and wanted a little boy. My girls are 7 and 6 and my son is now 3. We were in the same boat living in a 2 bedroom apartment with only my husband working. We just gave up on some of the fun stuff because we wanted another baby. Trust me your sons will love helping you and it makes your job a lot easier.Just have them help with getting u the diapers wipes clothes etc.It takes a lot of stress off of you. Good Luck
If you want to raise a little girl, consider adopting through the state of Iowa. It's free. There are plenty of children waiting, and more come into the system all the time, even newborns. Stipends are given in many situations to ease the financial burden of raising a child, up to age 18 or 21.
Plus, you can choose the age of the child and don't have to go through a pregnancy. Given yours are 3 and 4, you are probably very busy and tired as it is.
Good luck with whatever you decide.
Since you can't gaurantee 100% what you would have if you wouldn't be just as happy with a boy as with a girl I wouldn't do it wright now if I were you.
Not that it's any of my business, but I find it strange you are deciding this on your own - doesn't your husband have an opinion?
I'm in a similar situation, 2 boys and thinking about whether we want a third child. My husband always wanted 2 children and I always wanted 3, but sometimes now we each have the opposite preference. He's concerned about the extra cost of having 3 and I'm concerned about the extra time (and having less time for each child individually). For me, the idea of having 3 kids is more of a gut feeling - feeling like that's what would make our family complete. We would both like to have a girl, but I almost think my husband wants a girl more than I do :-). If we decide to have a 3rd, it's definitely not going to be so that we could potentially have a daughter, and I don't think that's a good reason to have another baby. For myself, I'm working on trying to separate my desires for experiencing being pregnant and giving birth one more time from my desires to have another child - if that makes any sense. OK, I'm pretty much rambling here, but that's what came to mind. Good luck with your decision!
I know lots of friends and family who have 4 little ones of one gender, and never have I heard them say they regret having more. My cousin has 4 boys and absolutely loves it. We are expecting our 3rd in May this one was a surprise and even though I know we will struggle at first especially on a single income I can't imagine life without this one already. We already had a boy and girl and got rid of all our old baby clothes so we are starting fresh with this one and wouldn't change it for the world.
