Should I Give My Newborn a Pacifier?

When I had my first, I almost felt guilty giving him a pacifier. He's almost 4 and this was just before all this SIDS research. Anyway, he took to it right away and it made naptime/bedtime really easy. I agonized over taking it away, and waited a loooong time. He was about 3 and a few months before I finally did it. And when I did, it was a piece of cake. I told him for a few weeks that the pacifier fairy came to take pacifiers away from big boys so that she could give them to new babies who needed them, and that she left a present. I kept asking him what he wanted from the fairy. So, eventually I just did it, took all the pacifiers and left him his present. He was very excited. the next night, he asked for his pacifier, but we reminded him about the fairy and that was that!

My second child did not take to pacifiers at all, but was still a great sleeper. Though as an infant, she was a bit more difficult to soothe since she didn't have a pacifier.

So, all said and done, my advice is pro-pacifier, for SIDS reasons, and for sanity's sake.

Hi N.! You ask a good question - i cannot answer yet - i am expecting my first baby next week & was wondering about that myself. I did not buy a pacifier yet... I just heard that they are not good to use. I heard that they can deform the mouth pallate and teeth if used alot - i also heard that they can be a crutch. But I dont know if that is old news or what. Things change so much as far as what to do/not to do. If you get some good replies, can you let me know what you decide to do? Thanks! R. ____@____.com

N.,
Ditto on the NUK brand paci! That said, see if your baby needs one before worrying too much about the future. They really do serve a purpose as long as babies are nursed first. Make sure he is not hungry and then let the soothing continue! Mothers cannot be pacifiers.
Consider the risk factors of sids. I know it is scary. However, if you don't smoke, if you breastfeed, if you put him on his back to sleep...Then you might see that you already have reduced some of the risk factors. Also, don't worry about taking a paci away. Many kids give them up on their own.
As long as you nurture them in addition to giving them a paci, blanket or doll, I think these things can only help them as they grow.
Amy

I agree with the mommy about the soothies pacifier. It is a God Send. I didn't give it to her right away though since I am breastfeeding and I wanted to make sure she had that down first, but now we can go from breast to pacifier to bottle with no problem.

My daughter took a pacifier since birth, and still has it at 19 months. I am going to wean her by 2 years. I find her pacifier is her security besides her blanket. When she gets really upset, it calms her and then we take it away. She also takes it to bed with her, and once she falls asleep, she spits it out. I don't know what I would have done without her pacifier (Nuk brand). She never sucked her thumb because of it and the good thing is I can take it away from her at anytime, unlike her thumb. Some babies have no desire for taking a pacifier.

we agonised as well, but nursing was getting longer and longer and at 6 weeks he started getting colicy, we popped it in and he LOVED it, and seems to calm him down now that he is teething as well (he'll be 6 months at christmas)
Sometimes I feels pangs that I'm popping it in to keep him quiet, but he really seems to calm down.
I'd just play it by ear, every child is different. He hates the nuk ones and loves the mami ones. we also found that he didn't like the newborn size and needed something bigger to start but he is quite a big boy.
Good luck with the second baby
cheers
H. W

pictures of LittleE can always be found at http://www.flickr.com/photos/____@____.com

I have used a pacifier with my daughter who is now 5 months old and she is very selective about which ones she will take (only nuk silicon nipples.) She is formula fed. Infants have an inate need to suck as this pacifies them. If you are breastfeeding and do not mind being a human pacifier than you may not need a pacifier. But odds are if there is no pacifier your baby will find something else to put in his mouth to pacify himself like his thumb. I personally would rather my child use a pacifier as I can control how often it gets washed unlike a thumb that touches everything and then goes straight in the mouth. Also I think it is much easier to break your child of a pacifier (I think by one year old is reasonable or when ever you give up the bottles as they can go hand in hand)than to try and take away a body part. It seems like some kids use their hands and thumbs as crutches much longer. Scary, but I've actually seen adult thumbsuckers. It really is a personal choice, but as an infant no harm is done by offering a pacifier. I do think it should be given up when they start to get teeth (so as to not impede dental growth)and when they start talking. I have sat for many kids who were older and still use pacifiers and in my experience they speak later and not as much or as clear as those without. Just my two cents.

Hi N., I wish that I had given my 2 sons pacifiers. I felt lucky that they took to their thumbs so quickly because it meant I would never have to wash or find lost pacifiers. But it is much easier to stop a child from using a pacifier than it is to such their thumb. I wish someone had told me that! Now that they're close to 3, I'm extremely worried about their teeth shifting. One son sucks so hard that his upper mouth is completely changing shape. He'll need oral reconstructive surgery on top of braces.

My son is 2 1/2 and he still uses his pacifier. All children are different and you might need to try different brands to find one that works...we went through 4 brands and we got a match!
I don't think their is such thing as "nipple confusion" You are warm, soft, with a heart beat and the bottles and pacifers are cold hard plastic. I never had a problem going from breast to bottle and so forth.
Like some of the other Moms stated sucking is a natural instinct for babies and toddlers to calm and sooth themselves. Both the dentist and Ped. said their was nothing wrong and it does not effect the pallet or start any dental problems. I have not seen any older children in school sucking them, so I am not worried and just taking the natural approach and will let him get rid of it when he is ready. He is now down to just nap and bed time, or when we are out past nap time or in a stressful situation we have an emergency one to help sooth and calm him down. My husband calls it the "mute button"...it really does help when they are upset, and once they are calm you can then work on finding out what the little one needs or wants.

If your baby wants to suck and you don't personally want to be his pacifier, I suggest you give him one. My son (exclusively breastfed) liked the Soothie ones since they were more "boob" shaped. The "orthodontic" ones tend to make kids chomp on them instead of sucking, which isn't good if you breastfeed! He used it regularly for the first 2 months or so, and gradually gave it up. He did not take it at all by age 3 months. He has never had a problem with nipple confusion etc. In my opinion, if your kid is so dumb that they can't tell the real goods from a pacifier... well, your kid won't be that dumb :)

I personally would not make a habit of putting my baby down with a pacifier after they get to be 3-4 months old - at that age you're forming perminant sleep habits, and the last thing you want is for your son to spit out his pacifier in the middle of the night and scream until you put it back in his mouth! If he can learn to suck his hands/fingers/thumb to soothe himself instead, that is better since he can't ever lose them.

When we have kid #2 I will likely do the same thing. There were many situations early on when that pacifier saved us from having a major breakdown in the grocery store or other inopportune place. If he still likes it a lot by 4 months just take it away from him cold turkey and he'll figure it all out in a couple days.

N.,

The pacifier worked for us, but we had doubts and concerns about using it. We held off on giving our daughter the pacifier because I didn't want it to confuse breastfeeding. I also didn't want to feel like I was giving it to her to shush her. She was getting so upset in the evenings. She was crying from 9 pm to 2 am. Around eight weeks, we tried introducing a Nuk pacifier. She wouldn't take this, but started using a Soothie (you can find this brand through Children's Medical Ventures). It has made a huge difference in her ability to nap during the day and fall alseep at night. It really calms her down. It does require one of us sitting by the bed at times popping the pacifier back in. She is much calmer and we are all getting more sleep, finally!

Hi N.,

I remember my lactation nurse advising me to not introduce my son with a bottle/pacifier until he was about a month old just to be sure he got nursing down pat. So when he was a little over a month we introduced both.

It seemed as if the pacifier helped soothe him to sleep. But my only problem was when the pacifer fell out he'd wake up and cry. It became such a chore to make sure he had it. So eventually (after a few months) we stopped giving it to him. We actually did the 'Ferber method' for sleep training and he found his fingers to suck on instead of the pacifier. I see nothing wrong with offering the pacifier unless maybe they find another way of soothing themselves.

Good luck with your second!

Mu daughter is still on her pacifier only for naps and bedtime, she is 22 months. We will be taking it away at Christmas time. Personally the pacifier for me was a life saver, it calmed her down when she was getting nuts or really crabby. Also if you child becomes a thumb sucker, it is so much easier to take away a pacifier than to get them to stop sucking the tumbs. My daughter had to have the Avent Silicone pacifiers....but we also used the Avent bottles.
Some babies need pacifiers to self sooth, some dont.

Hi! I'm expecting my fourth and none of my children used a pacifier. One less thing to worry about! My mom used one with my brothers and I'm not sure about me, but her advice is to make it disappear by the time your baby is 9 months old. They will notice and miss it if you use it a lot, but they are not old enough to ask for it, and eventually they just forget about them. Otherwise you have a major thing to deal with later.
I think what you did with your last baby sounded really great to me. My children went from breast to cup as well. I never had to deal with sterilizing bottles and pacifiers and everything that goes with that.
The risks of SIDS are greatest in smoking homes and other situations where their breathing could be compromised. You really can rest assured that your baby will be fine without a pacifier if you do not want to use one, but if you do, the standard is to wait a couple of months until your breastfeeding relationship is well-established

I was told that if you plan on giving your baby a bottle when breastfeeding (so you can go out without baby), you should do it at 6 wks. When I was working with a lactation consultant, she told me that 4wks was fine, too. My pediatrician told me it was fine at 2wks. I guess it just depends who you listen to. That being said, if you're baby is breastfeeding fine, then by 2-4wks it would probably be okay. They would be past that nipple confusion stage. The same for a pacifier. And, some babies just don't take a pacifier.