Sexy 'Bedroom' Clothes

Updated on January 31, 2011
L.L. asks from Killeen, TX
13 answers

So I really don't know how to ask this but here it goes. My husband likes it when I wear sexy 'bedroom' clothes. The thing is I feel real wried and uncomfortable in them. He tries to help with this telling me I look beautiful in anything and I don't have to worry. But I still feel wried. So my question I guess is how if ever did you deal with been uncomfortable in 'bedroom' clothes.

What can I do next?

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answers from Lincoln on

I'm with you, I hate them!
I like to have my flaws covered. I don't mind if hubby sees me naked, but I'm not in front of a mirror at that point so I just pretend I don't have flaws. :-)
I've tried finding some that I think look good, but haven't had any luck. I've gone to buying sexy matching bra and panties that he can see me in when we're undressing, but that's it.

3 moms found this helpful

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answers from Houston on

make sure they are off in less than 5 minutes :)

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answers from Seattle on

There are a lot of different STYLES of lingerie. Biggest trick, IMHO, is to find a style or styles that feel good to YOU.

Just as an example... you couldn't catch me dead in a teddy. Huh-uh, nope, not gonna happen. Since having my son, I'm also not a big fan of panties (I need a tummy tuck.

But babydolls, silky pants and camisoles, ditto shortie silk shorts and a sexy cami, kimonos... LOVE those. I also have to be able to wear a bra with whatever kind of bedroom clothes I'm wearing, because the girls -quite frankly- need one to be attractive / I need one not to be in pain from them knocking about. So that's MY style. I feel comfy/ happy in them.

2 moms found this helpful


answers from Fayetteville on

I'm guessing you are a fairly new bride. I also suspect that the bedroom clothes you have were gifts. If that's the case, I suggest that YOU pick out something you feel good in rather than what someone else wants you to wear. That would be a fair compromise, right?
You may want to talk to your husband about how it makes you feel so you both can come up with a solution like:
-soft candlelight rather than bright lamps
-more modest clothing
-under covers for your big reveal
-get him to try something you would like
-ask him for patience as you both work toward your goal

Just remember that he loves you and that he really does think you look beautiful! He married you, right? Try to enjoy it (at your own pace) and eventually you'll feel more comfortable in your own skin. I was the same as you when we first got married and can hardly believe how I've changed! After 15 years we still find ways to keep things lively, fun and sexy! Marriage has so many perks, bedroom time being one of the best! I hope you find a solution, sweetie! Feel free to write me anytime =)

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Chattanooga on

There are so many types . Just find something you like.. me i'm an at home nudist I'm not perfect looking but i like cute looking clothes



answers from Asheville on

Ask myself why I don't feel comfortable in them? Is it because I'm embarrassed to been seen as sexy? Is it b/c I don't think I'm beautiful. Do I have other beliefs I've brought with me from my family of origin that needs to be looked at that might inhibit me from feeling happy that my husband sees me this way... Really be honest with yourself as to why and than ask yourself if any of it is really true... Sometimes we have subconscious beliefs that we are not aware of that we bring into the bedroom. It's ok to be you and if you really just feel it isn't you, find something that is you and be sexy in it... Have fun! Lots of women would love to be in your shoes...


answers from Anniston on

Find what your comfortable in . My problem was see threw things and my tummy try school girl covers a lil more. So so personal hope this helps.


answers from Rochester on

I always started out wearing them but under the sheets to surprise him, so it was less initially revealing to me. (I will probably always be a prude at heart!) My husband is also always very verbal about liking how I look and trying to make me feel good, but I still find it easier to start out in more layers, if not sheets, then a bathrobe he can take off. It helps me feel better to take that more slowly (and I think he likes the surprise, too). I am more comfortable naked than in something revealing, but prefer to sleep in nightgowns so sometimes just a sexier nightgown with a bit of lace is a nice compromise.

If you have time, make sure you find things that fit and try to try them on in a store--I love Victoria's Secret things and they are in most malls--or try things on alone and look at yourself in them so you can see how awesome you look to him. Find something that flatters what you like best about your body (I avoid the sheer belly things since having kids--too many permanent stretch marks and extra skin to be really sexy). Anyway, we've been married almost 7 years and I still feel a little strange in them. =)


answers from Columbus on

I feel a little clownish and outrageous in some of the stuff I got as gifts, it's just out of character for me. My favorite thing to wear to surprise my hubby is a set I got from Fredrick's of Hollywood. It's a sheer white robe with matching lace bra & panties. It's basically see-through but I feel a little more modest when I wear it and not so ridiculous. Pick something out yourself and make sure it's comfortable and you feel gorgeous wearing it.

Tell your husband that if he wants to repay you for dressing up for him, he can do something romantic for you. Guys will do just about anything if they know it will pay off!


answers from Erie on

I love body stockings.



answers from Honolulu on

Tell your Husband to wear sexy bedroom clothes too!

Or you both go shopping together... Victoria Secret.. has so many men in there with their wives/girlfriends.

Just wear what you are comfortable in.
Unless he is expecting "costumes?"

I like boy shorts myself and those Calvin Klein type tank tops, or silk camisoles... At least my Hubby does too.

Sometimes, just changing the color of your under garments is a good change too.



answers from Nashville on

The perfect way to not feel weird is to have the lights off and maybe a candle or a nightlight. The dim light hides flaws, makes you feel sexier, makes you 'look' sexier, and makes you feel more comfortable. You can start with anything since he is just wanting you to be sexier in a little less.
I feel most comfortable in a t shirt and lounge/jammie pants. Not sexy AT ALL. One question is whether he wants you to put them on just for the 'preshow' or is he wants you to actually fall asleep and wake up sexy. If he just wants the foreplay, that part is easy, wear something sexy and then when you guys are ready for sleep, you put on your regular pjs..that is what I do. If he wants you to fall asleep in them, start with a cute tank top and cute satin shorts or even cotton shorts. You can even do the lounge pants if the top is cute enough. A long shirt with no bottoms is cute too. Try putting on one of HIS work shirts, a button down button only partially with nothing on underneath but your panties. When it is time for sleep you can either button it up or take it off and put on a t shirt. There are really dainty spaghetti strap cotton nighties that are sexy but comfy too. I suggest just going shopping either to VS or even to a department store. Also, if it is just for foreplay...I like to just put a mini skirt on, high boots or heals, and a jacket or button down in front. Something he likes that you wear normally but sex it up a bit for the bedrm. It can come off before 'sleep time'. have fun and don't be embarrassed, dim the lights, it works!



answers from Cleveland on

Maybe you could just tell him this is just one of your quirks. I am like you. The pajamas I wear are just comfortable. If he loves you, he will see your beauty in anything you wear. What I did was usually wore what I was comfortable in, and once in a great while surprised him with something more revealing. You can also buy silk pj's they cover everything, but are so comfortable to the touch that men seem to like them too. Good luck. I hope this helps in some way.

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