Seeking Help for My Child's Pacifier Addiction!

Updated on February 08, 2010
E.C. asks from Chicago, IL
30 answers

Hi Moms! I am looking for advice on how to help my daughter (27 months) say good bye to her drug of choice, the pacifier. Is there anyone out there in momworld who has advice on how to help her "detox"? For the most part, we have been able to reduce its use to bedtime, but we'd really like to help her fall asleep without it. I would appreciate any advice! Thank you.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.D.

answers from Chicago on

My sister had a 'Throw away the binkie' party for my neice. Balloons, cake the whole deal. After cake she had my niece throw the binkie in the garbage. My neice never asked for it again.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.D.

answers from Chicago on

The fairy story. I read it over a year ago & used it on my daughter & we were lucky enough to use it when we lost her pacifier by accident in the middle of the night. The story is the "fairy" come & takes pacifiers big kids are done with when left by the door, window, car etc.. any place you can get them to leave it. When the fairy takes the pacifier she/he leaves you a toy. Something good! You have to talk up the story to kind of get them ready & try to set a day to leave it by the door. It takes some tries, my daughter would leave it & come back for it. She would make up stories on why the fairy couldn't get to her pacifier. But when we lost it in the middle of the night she knew the fairy came & once she opened the gift she knew her pacifier was not coming back. One so/so night & she never looked back!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.B.

answers from Chicago on

I just finally did this with my 3 year old. She was only using it at night, but decided it was time to get rid of it. I had tried at 27 mos, but she got sick and I think she was getting her 2 yr molars, so it never really worked out. Anyways, we have been telling her for quite some time that it needed to go to get her prepared for it and when we were ready, I tried cutting off the very tip of it...it loses its sucking power, but isn't broken so they could choke on it. The first night I gave it to her, she threw it out of her bed. A couple nights later she threw it in the garbage. It was actually way easier than I thought it would be!!

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.K.

answers from Chicago on

Cold turkey is probably your best bet! It's harder for you then it will be for her!
Although, with my son, I went & cut all the tips off of all of his pacifiers - so he would find them with no tip & say "oh, it's broke" & look for the next one - he'd find pacifier #2 with no tip & say "oh, it's broke" - he'd keep looking & find pacifier #3 .... & so on & so forth. Since they all were "broke" - he decided to do without! It worked like a charm!
Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.H.

answers from Chicago on

I had a fun way to get my son off of it when he turned 3. About a month and a half before his birthday, I started telling him the story of the binkie fairie. Ours went this way (embellish as you see fit): When boys and girls turn 3 they become big kids and no longer need a binkie. The night before his birthday we make a special binkie box and gather all the binkies (he went to bed with one) and put them in the binkie box. That night the binkie fairie comes and takes all the binkies to give to new babies who need binkies. To thank him for sharing, the binkie fairie leaves a special big boy gift. I made him a no sew fleece fringe blanket with a cars pattern which he just adored. So with 5-6 weeks of repeating this story at night, he got to looking forward to it and the night of his birthday, I took all the binkies and he got his blanket, and we had not a single tear or fit about it. I was surprised at how smooth it went considering what a fiend he was for the binkie. So hope this story helps. It was totally tear free and stress free, but repeating the story a million times was what did the trick.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

Don't know if you already got this suggestion, but I have seen someone respond to this before. She called ahead to the hospital and asked if they could visit the nursery and spoke with a nurse about what she wanted to do. They had a talk about babies needing pacifiers and big girls handing them down. She put all but one pacifier in an envelope and took them to the hospital and gave them to the nurse to "give to the babies who need them". The envelope had a note on it that said "please just throw this away after we leave".
Then, they took the last pacifier to Build-a-Bear and made a special "Binkie Bear" with her last pacifier inside.
Sounded like a cute idea:)

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.R.

answers from Chicago on

I let my daughter throw them out herself and I told her they were bad for her teeth. Then I told her if she threw them away I would buy her a toy, I know this was a bribe but it worked!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.L.

answers from Chicago on

My 2.5 yr old daughter just got rid of hers this past week. She was just using it at nap and night time too. We visited my parents, and my mom noticed that my daughter chewed a hole in the pacifier. My mom was afraid she would choke on the pieces, and simply took it away from her and placed it on a shelf. My daughter asked for it throughout the week, but my mom said it was broken and she couldn't have it. We flew home without it... and it remains in Missouri forever. My daughter has not asked for it at home. And my newborn son has a pacifier, and I am surprised mu duaghter hasn't tried to take it away from him for herself. Now we have to work on the potty training. One step at a time....

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.U.

answers from Chicago on

I WROTE THIS AT THE BEGININNG OF THE MONTH _
My 33 month old daughter went to the dentist for the first time last week and the dentist told her she needed to throw her binky away so her teeth would stay nice and pretty. Well she came home and threw it in the garbage, she has NOT napped since and bedtime is a nightmare, but hopefully she will get better as the days go on. Good Luck!
AND SINCE SHE HAS DONE WONDERFUL, YOU HAVE TO MAKE IT HER DESICION, I WOULD GIVE HER UNTIL THE AGE OF 3...BUT THATS UP TO YOU, YOU COULD ALSO COUNT DOWN AND SAY IN 12 DAYS YOUR BINKY HAS TO BE THROWN AWAY...THE NEXT DAY IN 11 DAYS. ALSO HAVE HER THROW IT AWAY SO WHEN SHE ASKS FOR IT YOU CAN REMIND HER THAT SHE THREW IT IN THE GARBAGE, DONT WORRY SHE WILL BE FINE ( =

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.

answers from Chicago on

My son is going to be 3 next week and only rarely uses his anymore. He naps with it on weekends, doesn't use it during the week at daycare, and I've never allowed him to sleep with it at night. I kept his pacifiers/binkies in a small basket to the left of our TV in the living room. Before bed, I would hold Kenny and the basket and have him play "binkie basketball" where he would throw the binkie in the basket and I'd shout "Two points!!!" It's an activity he could anticipate each night and I always acted like this is what I expected of him. The reason he's never slept at night with a binkie stems from my mom's experiences with me. I myself was a binkie baby, quite a demanding one who would toss it out of the crib during the night and cry for it. One night while running to retrieve my binkie for me, my mom tripped and hurt her leg. I still hear about it on occasion to this day!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.M.

answers from Chicago on

We had to do it "cold turkey" as they say. We did have to do it twice. The first time he had just turned 2. I thought he should be rid of it (mind you he was really addicted!) but his actions after we took it away showed he still needed it. My normally easy going, happy child who was excellent at bedtime became violent (throwing die cast trains at us), miserable, and had major issues going to bed. After a few days of this we decided he just wasn't ready. We tried again 6 months later. At that point he was picky about his pacifiers- didn't like the feel of new ones. I "broke" (cut the top off and threw the top away) his pacifier and then showed him at bedtime that it was broken. He wanted me to fix it and I told him I couldn't. Since I knew he wouldn't take a new one I offered the new one to him. He of course refused and wanted to old broken one. I gave it to him and he realized it was broken. He complained a little, but accepted that he couldn't use the broken pacifier and went to sleep. After a few days of showing him the broken one at bedtime he was over it and was perfectly fine.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Chicago on

We went cold turkey with my daughter. She was 30 months. Definetly time for it to go. I thought she would freak, but she didn't. Good luck!!

Jenni

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.B.

answers from Chicago on

This may sound harsh but the way we got our little girl off the binky is we cut all the tips off of them so when she sucked she sucked air. When she went and tried them all and they all did the same thing we told her they must be broken,she pouted for a short while and that was the end of it!!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.R.

answers from Chicago on

I just went throughm this with my daughter who is over two and a half. I spoke to her about giving her "kiki" to santa so he could bring them to all the babies. We ended up going to see Santa at Macy's with all our kiki's wrapped up for Santa. Neeedless to say she wanted NOTHING to do with Santa so I had to hand them over which was not how I had wanted it to work out. In any case, day three is here and she is still asking for a kiki! However, she manages to sleep, though not as well and is definatly missing it. just remind her that we gave them to santa. I made sure there were none in the house because I would have caved in when she was crying for one and asking to borrow one, it broke my heart.
It is up to you on when to break the habit, I just thought we might as well do it now because I don't want her using one when she four. She also has a ducky that she uses to self soothe so I know she is not without any comfort.
Sara

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.G.

answers from Chicago on

How about - let's give it to Santa Claus for needy children?

A.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.S.

answers from San Francisco on

I was having major problems with my son's binky use; well actually it was more along the lines of a binky addiction!! My friend absolutely raved about the cut method, and all of the psychology behind it. She found it on www.bye-bye-binky.com , which is great that it was also free. We went with it and OMGosh... worked so beautifully for my son with NO tantrums, not even one! Thank you God. Five days later he did not want anything to do with his binky. What a relief it was to all of us to finally be done with those darn binkies. Highly recommended! I am also interested in others experiences.... B.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.B.

answers from Chicago on

We just broke (cut holes in them) all of her pacifier and had her throw them away. We told her she was a big girl and big girls didn't use pacifiers. The only thing is to make sure you get rid of all of them. Amazingly my daughter would always find the one we missed. Also you have to let her cry at bedtime. It hurts but eventually she feel asleep without her paci.

It is hard if your other child uses one because I have had friends who had younger children still using pacifiers and the older child would take them from the younger children.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.N.

answers from Indianapolis on

I just watched a program about this the other day. They were dealing with a 4 yr. old. Set a date and keep telling the child that no more pacifier on thet date and how many days left, then go with the child to build a bear and put it inside of a bear they pick out or whatever animal they choose. Make a big deal out of it and have them put the pacifier inside it before they stitch it up. That way they can have a stuffed animal to sleep with at night and know it's still in there but that they are big now. It worked.Good Luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.W.

answers from Chicago on

'lose' it,oops....It worked with my son at about the same age.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.S.

answers from Chicago on

We did several things for my daughter. One is made sure she was old enough to understand to let it go; when she turned three it was official. We talked about letting other kids have it and that it was a big milestone. Like you, we took it away during times that she didn't need it, the last one was sleeping/napping. We then put it in a package and sent it off to another baby whom she knew needed it more. I thought it would be hard, but she gave it up without any tears. One thing to be aware of, when she gave up the pacie, the napping totally stopped and she never napped again after that. Good luck!
T.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.P.

answers from Chicago on

My son's name is Ethan and he was also a pacifier addict! We did the same as you--weaned it down to bedtime. After that, it was a struggle. I tried cutting a slit in the tip and told him it was broken (didn't care), then I cut a bit off the end (still didn't care), then I cut the whole end off and said he needs to throw it away. That worked until an hour later I found him rummaging through the garbage. So we just did the dirty job of one night (after he'd fallen asleep) taken ALL the pacifiers (that we could find) and just threw them away. The next morning when he was looking for it, we told them that they all went to the moon because other little babies needed them at nighttime. That he was too big. For some bizarre reason, this crazy story clicked. Now when bedtime came, he was upset & crying for it. I had a moment where at midnight I was about to drive to a 24-hour grocery store and buy him one, but my husband held me back. It was hard for a few nights, but he eventually found a new way of getting himself to sleep (we tried to encourage him to sleep w/a stuffed animal). So I don't know if any of these ideas will help you, but like so many mom's have said to me "they don't go to college or walk down the isle with a pacifier" so they'll give it up eventually. The only time it's a problem is if it interferes with their speech (meaning they have it in 24/7). Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.J.

answers from Indianapolis on

Hi E.,
My son is 19 mnths and he just went through our paci detox program. He was down to just using it at bed time and occasionaly in the car. One night my husband told him if he wanted to watch Bambi (which is on a constant replay on our TV) that he would have to throw away his paci. That night at bedtime was really really hard. I won't lie we wanted to just give it back to him. But it did get better. He went to Crying then the second day he would hit his mouth and make a noise but no crying. The third night I just had to sway back in forth with him until he was almost asleep. And now two weeks later we do our bedtime routine then lay him in bed PACI FREE!!!
So we I guess went cold turkey with our son. Anytime he would ask for it we told him Remember you threw it away. No more paci. And would praise him that he was doing such a good job and was such a big boy.
There are so many different ways of doing this and is sooo hard. I will be taking the paci away earlier with our second child, maybe that will be easier.
I wish you and your family good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.B.

answers from Chicago on

I succeeded getting my addict free from pacifiers with a two-pronged attack... 1) planting the idea in her head that when she turned 3 she'd be a big girl who wouldn't need a pacifier, since pacifiers are for babies, which was supported by 2) The Pacifier Fairy. My daughter had about 4 pacifiers still floating around when we started this, two that were favorites and two that were only used when desperate. On two different nights she put the lame pacifiers under her pillow for the Fairy to take to babies who needed them, and she got small toys in exchange (princess board books actually). Then the next two were tossed on her own accord around her birthday because she didn't need them anymore, and wanted to be a big kid. Of course now she's sucking her thumb like a junkie and it almost seems like it's messed her teeth up even more!! Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.F.

answers from Chicago on

I could have written your post. My Son is 26 months and LOVES his pacifer ("pipe"). We have weaned him to only nap and bedtime, but it's not just the one he has in his mouth, he has to be holding 2 or 3 at the same time. If he comes out of his room with them, I tell him that those have to stay in his bed. He's loves them so much, sometimes he will go right back and sit in his bed just so he can hold them. My family keeps pressuring me to throw them away, but like some of the previous posts have mentioned, he's such a good sleeper that I hate to take away his self soother. We talk about getting rid of them all the time. My older son gave them to the garbage man the week before he turned 2 and never looked back, but my youngest is a whole different ballgame. I've decided to wait it out a little while longer and eventually just go cold turkey. My goal is January 1, so we'll see. Good luck!!!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.

answers from Chicago on

Honestly, 27 months is really early to wean her. Your child has found a way to self soothe. Would you prefer the night waking or her "addiction," which is not an addiction at all, to the pacifier? I allowed my child to decide when he should retire his pacifier. We discussed it in length and at four he gave his pacifier to the pacifier fairy so that it could be restored for other babies who needed more than he did. In exchange he got to pick a big boy thing to do with us his parents. A reminder children do not go to college with a pacifier. Making a healthy, emotionally confident child is our job. They will learn how to self soothe eventually.

I hope that helps.

K.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

B.A.

answers from Chicago on

I don't know if I agree with the countdown till birthday - is she going to dread her approaching birthday then? I like the Build a Bear idea, though.

I'm raising my 2 granddaughters now, and fortunately my daughter never started them off with a paci, but when my daughter was little, I know it was a couple months before her second birthday, so she was about 21 or 22 months old, we went cold turkey, and had maybe 3 really rough bedtimes, and that was it.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.R.

answers from Duluth on

I hope this helps,
We had to go to Milwaukee for my husband's work. My son was 27 months like your daughter is now. we were there for two nights. The first night he had his paci! The second night he actually fell asleep without it. He was in bed with us and fell asleep watching his dad play video games. I moved him to the crib and he stayed asleep. I didn't even have it in his crib, like i would when we were at home. He woke up that morning and wanted it but he was ok with out it. So then that day we had to drive home and he fell asleep in his carseat without it. And from that day on he hasn't used it. He did ask about it but I told him he couldn't and didn't need it anymore. He seemed fine with it! That was exactly a year ago. Then baby brother came around in March and we were gonna do the binkie with him and my first son would put the baby's binkies in his mouth but would spit them out almost as soon as he put them in. Baby brother doesn't have any interest in the binkie. I don't know if that's a blessing or not! Good luck on you Binkie Detox!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Indianapolis on

Hi E.! I'm a SAHM of 3 - ages 8,6,5. We had this same problem with our oldest. She was 2 when her first brother was born and we just couldn't take it away then. Then we had two with pacifiers when our third was born. And we couldn't bear the horror of taking away both of theirs, especially when we knew we'd be using one with the third.

So, on the youngest one's 1st birthday - we went cold turkey - with all three - AND SURVIVED! Our oldest at 4 1/2 at the time (yes, that is embarrassing to write) - was nearly devastated. We had weaned her to only naptime and bedtime, before the cold turkey event - but it was still hard.

Here's the good news. We picked the day - over a weekend - so Dad would have to endure also - and went for it. First night - HELL! Second day - HELL! Third day - OKAY! Fourth day - over!

I'm not kidding - four days and it was over for all three. And they're like smokers - they'd pick it up again today if I would let them have them!

Good luck to you!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.R.

answers from Indianapolis on

We decided last year to give our pacifiers to Santa Claus to give to the babies that needed them for Xmas. She readily handed them over, but did have some withdrawal for a few days at bedtime. However, she got over it pretty quick after (a lot) of reinforcement on those babies and how she is a a big girl now. It worked with my first one as well. Good luck.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.S.

answers from Evansville on

With my son (3 this last September), on his second birthday, we told him it was time to give up his 'pacie.' We made him throw it away. Now, for almost a year, when he'd find one (stuck under the couch, tucked in a drawer, under the seat in the truck... man, those things hide everywhere!), it was a battle, but eventually he stopped asking for them and I found all of them that were hidden away and tossed them. Just be firm and say those are for babies, not for big girls.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions