Seeking Advice on What My Son Should Say About Why His Job Ended in Interviews

Updated on August 29, 2013
K.D. asks from Cary, NC
9 answers

My son is 21 and does have a high school diploma. He is highly functional autistic but still was able to get a part time job on his own at Lowe's Foods in their bakery department for a year. After a year they stopped giving him hours. So his job ended there and he didn't know why. So then we went through VR (Vocational Rehabilitation - a government program) which he tested out as qualifying for with enough of a disability. After a year they got him a job at Kroger in their bakery department. They knew his diagnosis this time, so I thought that might help. At first they were excited with him. But after a few months, one day he didn't bring his nametag with him. His nametag has a shortened version of his middle name on it, which is what he goes by and he hates his first name. He acts like he has been punched and looks sick when you say his first name. He was teased about it too much as a child. I plan to legally change his first name for Christmas so this will never happen again. But anyway, he went into work and they made him another nametag, but they put his first name on it and spelled it wrong (not that that really made a difference). He wouldn't wear it. He tried to explain why but his manager would interrupt him and yell. She told him 5 times to wear it and when he wouldn't, he lost that job. VR is going to work with him again to get him a new job. My question is, do you have any ideas on how to spin why the last job ended? His job coach has not gotten with him yet but he has said that maybe he should just leave that job off of his resume. If he does, then he can't apply at Harris Teeter since Kroger bought them and also we have a neighbor that works there and knows our son worked at Kroger. I think the most helpful advice would be from people in retail or with job coaching or headhunting type experience. Even if he doesn't put the reason he left on his resume, they could definitely ask him in the job interview. So what would he say?

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So What Happened?

I love Sue W.'s answer and we will practice that response with my son.

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Maybe just leave it off and go with another company. What about the Food Lion bakery? Or the Walmart bakery? There's also the Carlie C's in Garner. They have the most wonderful bakery around!

1 mom found this helpful

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

I am an HR professional. Below are a couple of things that you and your son should consider.

First, Krogers employees are represented by a Union. He needs to get in touch with his Union rep and file a grievance regarding his termination of employment. There are processes that the Company and Union need to go through regarding terminations. Especially since your son has special needs.

Second, most companies will not state why an employee was terminated. I don't. All I will verify is the hire/termination date, amount paid and position. That is it! Nothing more, nothing less. If I am asked about rehire eligibility, I state that we do not give out that information as well. Sort of like "name, rank and serial number".

On the resume, I recommend that he puts all his employment down. He was employed at those companies for a couple of years. He needs to show that he has worked for a period of time without difficulty.

If you have any questions, pm me and I will be happy to help.

(My daughter worked at Krogers in the deli all through college). =)

11 moms found this helpful
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C.C.

answers from New York on

I have some experience dealing with this, in terms of explaining the job loss.

The first thing is that someone (maybe not your son himself, maybe the job coach) needs to contact Kroger HR and find out what *they* will say about his termination. "Terminated for insubordination"? The company will have some official phrase to give to prospective employers who call to check on his employment history...they are unlikely to tell prospective employers "this one time, he wouldn't wear his nametag".

Once you know what the "party line" from Kroger is, you can think about how to frame your son's statements about the job.

Also, does your son have a list of "references"? If he wants to put Kroger on his resume, he should have someone from Kroger who is willing to be listed as a reference (and will speak positively about him).

I do not think you should rush to leave Kroger off of his resume. He will then be in the awkward position of explaining the [fake] hole on his resume, why he went X years without working, etc.

6 moms found this helpful
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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I am a career consultant/job coach at an Outplacement company and a former HR Manager. I agree with the advice given by SouthernYankee.

I would also recommend that his resume should contain all his work experience. Resumes do not include reason for leaving, only job information and dates of employment.

I would help him prepare for an interview, where the question "why did you leave your last job?" is likely to be asked. The answer should be short, truthful, unemotional. A potential employer will be less concerned about the incident than how your son describes the incident.

He could say "My supervisor wanted me to wear a name tag with my legal first name on it, which I hate. We disagreed and they ended my job. I'm glad I had the job because I learned....." ending on a positive note about what he learned by working there or what he liked about the job.

No matter the name on his resume, he will have to show legal documents for the I-9 form the company is required to fill out, to prove eligibility to work in this country. (Many people use names other than their legal name on all documents other than legal/government.) Your son may not be in control of which name the company decides to use internally. If you do have his name changed, he may need to provide the court provided legal document showing that name change to future employers.

4 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

He is being too upfront. I have a high functioning autistic child, comes with the package. Still they have trouble understanding that some rules are not black and white and believe it or not your name is one.

My parents changed my name on my school records when I was going into first grade. I was teased unmercifully for it, shame really, it was a thoughtful name but I digress. I have always used the changed name on applications for employment no one has ever questioned it. My driver's license has my legal name but because it is close it is okay.

So, although this won't help his past in the future apply with the name he uses, switch his first name to the middle spot. When he has a formal resume put G. Steven..... It is perfectly acceptable to use an initial for his first name. My point is make it clear from the get go this is the name I use and you won't have to have name tag issues.

So far as the old job goes, it was not a good match, because it wasn't.
_______________________
I am 45 and have not used my legal name for employment ever. One day I may be rich and bored and change my name but for now, nah.

4 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

When I was a hiring manager I found that the truth normally works, most people did not put why they left a job on their resume, that was asked during interview. Find a way to sum it up with as few words and as honestly as possible if you need to put it on his resume. This would typically go under the "employee conflicts" label when making notes during an interview.

The name issue - would be considered an Alias - and reflect on credit reports and such in that manner.

Do you have a Tom Thumb or Safeway related store? As a patron they typically have special needs employees that are very wonderful and appear to be treated well. I have experienced this at most Tom Thumbs I have been to.

2 moms found this helpful
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O.O.

answers from Los Angeles on

I believe all that previous employers can do is to verify employment and the length of employment.
They cannot give details about the name tag issue.
List the corporate HR number for the contact, that way the call (if its ever made) will be answered by a professional.
Double check with the job coach as well.

1 mom found this helpful

A.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I've never heard of or seen (and I have seen many resumes) anyone listing the reason for leaving or ending of a current job on a resume.

I would not just leave off the employment off the resume...unless it has been 10 years or more..or it is not relevant to the current position.

If they ask why, I would tell the truth.

To omitting this information is just as bad as lying and if as an employer I found out later...I'd be furious.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Santa Barbara on

My question/comment is off topic. I'm now curious about what name would be made fun of. I recall someone in college with the first name that he never used and only went by his middle name Craig. The first name was too embarrassing. I found out on the old fashion caller ID that the first name was William. I think William is a wonderful name, yet he did not feel the same.

Anyway, I think SouthernYankee has great advice and I like Flaming Turnip's idea of using the initial of the first name with the middle name on a resume.

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