Seeking Advice on Quitting

Updated on April 09, 2009
T.C. asks from San Jose, CA
33 answers

Hello,
I have finaly come to the realization that I need to quit smoking. The health risks are just too much, not to mention the recently sky rocketing cost of cigarettes. I'm looking for advise on how to stop. In the past I have been successful doing it cold turkey only to start years later because of a stress trigger. I think I need help this time. What do you suggest?
Thanks for any help!!

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So What Happened?

All I have to say is WOW! You are all awesome. I had been hiding my smoking from my children for about a year now (yea, I know, they have to know from the smell alone)Any way, I'm tired of the lies. I've made the decision to buy no more smokes. Tomorrow will be my first smoke free day!! YAY ME! I keep repeating to my self "you can do this" and it seems to help. I will be taking a few of you up on your offers of support and/or mutual support for those trying to quit with me. Maybe we can keep each other up to date with progress and be able to vent. :) Thanks again so much. I am confident that I will succeed!!! I have to.

Featured Answers

A.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Congratulations on a fine decision! Patches and gum are all well and good but they are short term crutches. I see that you already know from experience that the addiction never truly goes away. What you need is a long term game plan for dealing with stress. It might mean learning some new coping mechanisms or perhaps a lifestyle change.

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J.H.

answers from San Francisco on

I have had a bunch of friends quit by taking Chantix.. they had to pay like 148 for it but they said it was worth it and they have never had another craving.. GOod luck

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

T.,

I have heard that hypnosis works really well for smoking cessation.

Good luck to you!

Molly

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E.G.

answers from San Francisco on

Congratulations, you have made the first big step in making the decision that you need to quit. I quit smoking as my wedding present to my husband. It was not easy, and even now (5 years later) I sometimes still get a craving for a cigarette. However, the benefits are so much better! My advice for you is to treat it like the lifelong commitment that it is, and take it just as seriously as you do your marriage. When I quit, I bought a new pack and went as long as I could possibly stand it and then I would have one, but I would NEVER finish an entire cigarette. A few puffs and that was it. The first couple of days I smoked 2-3, then 2, then one, and finally I told myself that I had had enough. I smoked a total of 11 cigarettes out of the pack. I still have the rest. I bought a quit smoking pack just in case my original plan failed. It was called Smoke Away. It was an all natural based plan with vitamin supplements. I never used it, eventhough it came highly recommended to me. You might still be able to find it online. I wish you the best of luck, and don't be too h*** o* yourself. It is a tough thing to do, but you will be amazed at all of the things that will open themselves up to you. I found I had an extra 100 minutes a day to do other things. My car doesn't smell any more, my pillow always smells fresh, and I know that my son is not breathing in any bad chemicals from my clothes, hair, or my breath. Send me an e-mail if you ever feel you need some extra support. :-)

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L.P.

answers from Sacramento on

T.,
This won't help BUT I'm with you 100%. But I'm scared....I'm not sure why exactly, been smoking way too long. Started at 14, am 30yrs older now, like you I quit several times for a couple months or years (had no trouble quitting cold turkey when I knew I was pregnant etc) but Now I don't know what to do. I want to quit so badly but I'm afraid to tell anyone for fear of failing, but on the other hand I do know I WILL need the help & support of my family etc.....
We just recently had our grandson move in with us, so I don't want to expose him & the cost is just outrageous! IF, sorry WHEN I quit, I want to save the money so we can have a second honeymoon. We've been married 25 yrs this May & won't be able to go anywhere this year but IF I saved all my smoking money maybe we could go next year?
That's my goal.... The mom's on this site are so great!!
Would you be willing to share your advice? Or maybe you are looking for a support person?maybe we could help eachother? Let me know....
And if not I will understand, you may not want a support person you've never even met? But just know this, you are not the only one out there feeling the same things ....and GOOD LUCK. I hope we both succeed!!!!!!!
Thanks, L.

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K.U.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T.,

I went back and forth for years myself, tried the patch, the Nicorette gum, cold turkey, and I kept going back within a year. In the end I just needed to want to quit enough to follow through. You can get through the cravings, obviously, you've done that before. What you need is a plan to get you through those times of stress when you would be vulnerable. I can tell you what I did, and it's worked and reinforced itself. I started taking a yoga class, and I go religiously, literally, it's every Sunday morning when other people might be in church. I also started going on walks when I felt stressed or just to keep myself healthy. These things not only deal with the cravings during stress, but they help prevent a stress response from happening in the first place. I haven't looked back since I finally quit for good. I no longer miss it or look wistfully at people who are smoking. I feel too good, and I enjoy clean air too much, to want to foul it up. So my best advice for you: power walks, yoga, and deep breathing. They work better than the patch. All the best. -K.

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C.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Hello T.,
I quit smoking 4 years ago, although I still crave a cigarette daily...especially today since I found out I'm losing my job.
Anyhow, I used the patch. I had used it about 3 or 4 years before, without sucess. What I did this last time was use the patch as I needed it. I did the first step, and once I felt good about where I was with it I went to the second level. I had the hardest time with the last step and completely getting off it. Rather then using the last patch for the 3 weeks (or whatever the time span was) I would use it until I didn't feel I needed it any more and on specific days.
I chewed a lot of cinnamon gum and ate a lot of breath mints.
I remember whining about wanting a cigarette after I quite 9 months prior and my mom saying, "are you going to smoke again?" and I said, "no" and she said, "then suck it up, if you keep whining the craving won't go away." She also told me to take it one day at a time. If you tell yourself you can never have one again, it will make it harder.
Feel free to message me any time for support! You will be so proud of yourself!!!

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G.B.

answers from Boise on

Hi T.,

For me it was getting rid of the triggers. I had a lifechange.

I dropped Alcohol... coffee... and even a freind who got me started again. I quit hanging around her.
I quit going around my brother and his wife, who are chainsmokers and alcoholics.

I didn't want my kids to smoke, which also led me to quit... they were stunned when the found out, and my husband hated it so much it really drew a wedge between us. I know my Lord, was saddened as well.

I had no reasons left to continue to smoke!

The biggest help though, was changing the atmosphere around me, PEOPLE, places, things that made me want to do it.

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E.M.

answers from Bakersfield on

Hi T.-
I quit my dabble of smoking strictly due to vanity. Not a great reason when I knew the cancer risks involved, but I didn't want to sound like a man or have those deep, inset wrinkles around my lips. 12 years later, the smell of djarum clove still intoxicates me a little. My husband also struggles with tobacco, but he went to chewing (GROSS) 2 years after he quit smoking. This is what I truly believe works. If you can quit cold turkey without a hitch do that again. As far as the stress triggers, find something like Yoga or meditation or tai chi to do regularly to manage stress. I also believe that hypnotism can help with your stress triggers and keep the cravings practically non-existent. My last suggestion- make your family and time spent with them the reason you quit. Every time stress triggers you, pull out their photo with a little sticker or label on it that says something like "I want to see my boys married....their children....their college graduation..." whatever will inspire you more than the stress that bogs you down.
Hope this helps
-E. Mc

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K.V.

answers from San Francisco on

First congrats on making thes hard but very healthy decision! I was never a die-hard smoker....just a social smoker back in my clubbing days so my experience isn't 1st hand but I know some friends who stopped by cutting back to the point of no cigs at all. Keep youself busy, maybe take up a new hobby to keep your hands busy like knitting or crocheting. When you feel the need to have a cig, distract yourself somehow....maybe leaving your desk or work area for a jaunt around the office or a breath of fresh air. Stay strong & best of luck!

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N.T.

answers from San Francisco on

T.....congrats on making such a great decision! I quit 9 years ago and am so glad I did! What helped me was going on the patch....but I made a big deal about my last day of smoking and all the cigarettes i had left at the end of that day i took to the garbage and broke them all. The other major important part of my success, I think, was preparing myself mentally......picking a date and then quitting on that day. Find something to keep yourself occuppied the first week....I started scrapbooking. Surround yourself w/ some healthy crunchy snacks. Lollipops only made me mad, lol....so I had pretzels, popcorn, veggies. And then I stopped drinking at that time as well since that was a trigger for me. The one last thing to cement the quitting for me was that I read that smoking brings on menopause sooner....who the heck wants that? :P
I hope that helps you! GL!

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N.H.

answers from Sacramento on

Hi T.,

I just wanted to share my husband's experience. He was a 1-2 pack a day smoker for almost 15 years before I met him (started when he was 14!). When we met, he had been using nicotine patches for 2 weeks. He continued using those for a few more weeks, but still had the cravings, and was missing the oral fixation part, so he switched to the nicotine gum - he chewed the Nicorette coated variety.

He continued chewing the gum for about 2 years, even though you're only supposed to use it for a short period. It was pricey, but not nearly as expensive as the cigarettes! He then decided that he wanted to be nicotine-free completely, so he started chewing regular gum and went back to the patches and actually did the whole "step-down" system. It's now been over a year, and he's completely done.

Seriously - if he can do it, you can do it! Good luck!

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C.V.

answers from San Francisco on

it's all pschycological..i quite 4 times, the last time around i just really wanted to so i did. My dad having a heart attack freaked me out and made me want to live a healthier lifestyle so I can be around longer for my daughter. I still crave them, especially when im at a social event after a few drinks and during stressful situations. It's all about will power and thinking about the longterm affects from smoking.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

T.,
I have had several friends stop smoking by using acupuncture. Not only can they knock done the craving but they can give you guidance on detoxing your body. Good luck with stopping. You will be helping yourself in so many ways. C.

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N.K.

answers from San Francisco on

Dear T.,

I real all the other responses to make sure I was not repeating somthing someone else had written before responding. I was a regular smoker for about eight years, at lease a pack a day. I had quit and started again three times. Like you when stressful life things happened I would start again to cope.

I finally decided I had to quit for good and really truly comitted my heart and head to the process. Then I had hypnosis! It was amazing. I know people are skeptical of this but it was amazing. After the one treatment which cost about $100.00 (I know, expensive but when you add up how much you have spent on cigs it is nothing)I never needed a cigarette again. I had the treatment and then everytime I had a physical craving for a cigarette the words "I am a non-smoker" would come into my head and the craving would go away. The therapist had had my say this several times during the treatment and I never felt likeI was under "Mind" control. I was never aslepp or unaware of what was happening which some people assume is how it works. It is truly amazing. I have been free of cigarettes for five years now and now the smell of smoke does not even smell good to me! Good luck, be strong and get help to kick the habit. It works!

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C.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Welbutrin might help, I'm sure your doctor will prescribe it. Best of luck, you can do it! C.

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S.R.

answers from San Francisco on

Commit Lozenges are fantastic! Keep a bottle in your purse for "craving" times. Unlike the patch, you do not have to be on them 24 hours a day, just when you need them, and they taste MUCH better than the gum.

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M.W.

answers from San Francisco on

If you have Kaiser insurance, their stop smoking program works really well. If not, see if your physician will issue prescription for the Wellbutrin, which is what I used. My husband and I both quit at the same time and we both survived. I am happy to report that it will be one year in June since we stopped and we couldn't have done it without the help of Kaiser.

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G.M.

answers from Modesto on

Good for you for trying to quit, that is the first step to actually quitting (trying). I've quit several times this past year. It is not an easy task. I've tried the patches but I don't really like them... why replace cigarettes with just another bunch of chemicals going into the body, it's just crazy if you think about it? The best way is cold turkey. I went a whole week and felt great about it, then I succumbed to a craving and bought a pack... I made it last a whole week tho (normally I'm a pack a day smoker)! I went two more days without, then bought another pack. I'm totally AWARE of each cigarette I smoke, it makes them less enjoyable if you start looking at them as a vice rather than a pleasure. You soon begin to really hate them which makes it easier and easier to lay them down. The thing that has made it easier for me this time around is the fact that they are taxed 158%, I like our govt, but I dont want to help the cause by THAT much and at the expense of my own health. The cost of a pack of cigs should be enough of a cessation device to any of us that are on the brink of giving them up. If everyone quit smoking there would be a huge deficit in the budget..... what will they replace tobacco tax with I wonder? Oh yeah, I know, they show drug commercials on TV all day long trying to get us all addicted to them! We live in an addicted country, that's how the govt gets its revenue. It's the sad, hard truth. If you already work you are already a tax payer, why give them another 158%? It's just ridiculous. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.
Go cold turkey tho, it's the best and fastest way to get all the nicotine and other toxins out of your body. Just start eating healthy snacks in replacement of the smokes. Drink lots of water. When your brain knows those chemicals are out of your body (they say 10 days, I think sooner if you cleanse your system with good stuff)then it's easier not to defile yourself again. Cigarette smoke stinks so much... I remember my kids telling me that they hated that there clothes smelled like cigarettes (kids at school would tell them that)... that's just a horrible thing to do to your children. I regret every minute of the smoking I did around my kids, wish I could go back and make it right. Go through a photo album, how many pictures do you have of yourself with a cigarette in your hand? Put a couple of them in obvious places around the house to remind you how "not glamarous" it really is.
Good Luck.
Boy, I sure vented on this one. I'm talking to myself obviously.

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K.G.

answers from Sacramento on

First-- congrats on making the decision. My hubby was a chewer.. he didn't smoke but dipped...chewing tobacco which I heard was worse cause it goes directly through your lips, mouth for instant affect and instant damage. We used the patch. It was still hard and some people say they just need to feel like they have a cig in their mouth, so try suckers or candy sticks. My hubby would have to use that jerky that looked like chew..for the sensation of having it between his lip..
They are pretty costly, but I know that some healthcare will cover it.

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W.P.

answers from San Francisco on

HI T.,
Recently my 32 year old son quit smoking after trying many times but this time he used the patches to help when the triggers came up he said it really helped and after just about a week he was off the patches and off cigarettes. It has been well over fourty days and he still is not smoking.
Good Luck!
A happy mom,
W. P.

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D.H.

answers from San Francisco on

I have been taking Wellbutrin for about 7 years now. I first started taking it to quit smoking and kept taking it to relieve stress and help with PMS. It really takes the edge off and makes you feel much less stressed. Ask your Doctor about Wellbutrin.

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K.G.

answers from San Francisco on

T. --
Whenever you encounter a stress trigger, remind yourself that whatever stressed you out in the first place is not going to change or go away because you smoke a cigarette. If a cigarette could actually fix a nasty coworker or undo a mistake you've made, they would be like a million dollars a pack. If that doesn't work, think about what you are going to sat to your children when you are dying and leaving them without a mom because of a preventable disease or, even worse, what you will say to them if one of them gets a disease from second hand smoke. Even traces of smoke on your clothes can harm your kids (they're calling it third hand smoke these days I think). In that moment where you have the choice either to smoke or not to smoke, remember that cigarettes solve nothing and remember your motivation for quitting. I used to pretend smoke a straw at first because the breathing pattern is what relaxes you. Nicotine is actually an upper. I've also heard that some people have found acupuncture to be helpful. Perhaps seeing a therapist for a couple of sessions to learn relaxation methods would help, too. You can do this!

D.M.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T....I haven't read the other responses, so I'm sorry if this is redundant...but I used Wellbutrin just a few months ago..worked great. The first day was very emotional, but I just kept busy at work to keep my mind off of it. The car was hard for me so I kept gum around to keep my mouth busy while I was driving. After the first 3 to 5 days it was A LOT easier....Good luck, your health and future is so worth it!

D. :)

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S.P.

answers from Sacramento on

Good for you. I quit for just basic reasons on Friday. Wellbutrin is helping a lot. it's covered under most insurance policies where zyban isn't even though it is basically the same drug.
good luck.
S.

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M.J.

answers from San Francisco on

I myself have not quit smoking, but two very important people in my life (mother and husband) were long time smokers.
Both of them were able to quit using the Committ losanges. My husband is a pretty determined person, once he sets his mind to something he is able to accomplish it. My mother on the otherhand had been smoker for nearly 40 years and had tried a variety of methods to quit before (cold turkey, nicorette, the patch, groups, etc). The only thing that has worked (she has been smoke free for 7 years) were the losanges. Occasionally, she will still use them, but the trade off is much better than a ciagrette.
I hope this helps and good luck!

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J.F.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T...I too just quit smoking 2 months ago. What made me quit was my 14yr old. Him and I were in a conversation about trust and telling the truth. His EXACT words were..."mom, why should I tell the truth, when you havent. When I asked him to go into more detail he said, when we were first going to move into our new home, you PROMISED you would quit smoking (that was 1.5 yrs ago). I said you are so right. I thanked him for calling me on that..It truly goes to show that our kids do sometimes hear what we are saying..lol..I quit then. It was hard and I did slip a few times, but I just kept remembering how important it is for my child to see a good role model.

Hope this helps in some way for your venture to a new and renewed self.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I don't have any advice for you, but I wanted you to know I'm right there with you. I also need to quit and have quit in the past via cold turkey just to start again years later because of a stress trigger. I have tried once or twice to quit again, seems harder this time around! I know I need help too, just not sure what. I tried the lozenges - they did absolutely no good and cost me about as much as a carton of cigarettes! I've thought about hypnosis. I had three friends who did it. It only worked for one out of the 3. I've heard horror stories about those pills, can't recall the name, so I'm afraid to try them. I really don't know what to do!

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H.J.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T.,

Like my grandma always says...It's easy to quit...I do it all the time!

I quit 5 years ago and have been very successful, however I quit at least 7 times before I got it right. Here is what I did the last time...

*Nicotine Patches ~ I really believe in these, they are expensive initially, but in the long run it is worth it.
*Creating a new ritual ~ I started a new "habit." When I wanted a cigarette, I would automatically do my "new habit." My habit was walking, but I also tried drinking tea, I think you need to find the one that will work with your lifestyle. Deep breathing can help in a pinch when you can't do your new habit.
*Forgive myself immediately for the little relapses that I had in the first few months.
*Weekly Therapist ~ This was the most important part of my struggle. I started to see a therapist to help manage my stress and I still see her every week. This has really helped me work on so many issues that I have had throughout my life and is the best thing I have ever done for myself and for my family.

I really wish you good luck. I know how painful and hard it is to quit, but you can do it and once you do quit and maintain your quit, you will gain a multitude of confidence that can propel you towards many other lifetime goals. Let us know how it goes!

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L.A.

answers from San Francisco on

There was a program called Smoke Enders back in the 80's. Not sure if they're still around, but it was the best money I ever spent. I quit in 8 weeks back in 1984, after smoking two to three 1/2 packs a day for years. As it turns out my cousin in Connecticut went through the program too. We haven't had so much as a thought about smoking again, not even one crave moment. Check with your doctor or do some reseach on-line. I've heard that acupuncture works well too.
Good luck - you won't regret it!

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S.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T. C,
I too have trouble with quitting. I have quit in the past with great success by using the Stanford Stop Smoking Program, but once the Stay-at-Home-Mom status started and the teething of my 3 month old at the time, I went nuts and started again. That was almost 4 yrs ago. I am now quitting again by using ZeroSmoke. It's a magnet that you wear on your ear for up to 4 hrs a day that is supposed to supress your cravings and help you quit without any nicotine. I have cut back excessively, but have not yet quit completely. But I am still very hopeful that the ZeroSmoke is working. The best part is that it's inexpensive compared to everything else out there and it is a one time cost. Go to zerosmoke.com and check it out for yourself. Good Luck! Maybe we'll both be smoke free soon.

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G.R.

answers from San Francisco on

T., Good for you!

I see no one has yet mentioned what finally worked for me: Wellbutrin. I had tried cold turkey, gum, the whole shebang, and I finally thought, why do this the hard way when I can do it the easy way? The Wellbutrin really made me not want to smoke. After 6 months I was able to get off the meds and haven't had a craving since. It's truly a wonder drug.

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A.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Hi T.,

It's going to be a great thing when you're smoke free! It's the best thing in the world you can do for your own health and for your family. (I lost a parent to a smoking-related death, and it was devastating.)

In CA there's a site that's good for starting out: www.tobaccofreeca.com/getting_started.html

Also the American Cancer Society has a "Guide to Quitting" section here: http://www.cancer.org/docroot/PED/content/PED_10_13X_Guid...

And please do check with your doctor too. Maybe you'll be a good candidate for the patch, gum or other products to help ease the transition.

I wish you all the luck you need to quit and make it stick!

-A

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