Seeking Advice on Possible ADHD Symptoms/how to Deal

My son now 9 years old has been diagnosed with ADHD. When he was at the ages of 3 the doctor recommened medicine for him, however i decided he was too young for any medicine of that sort. ( he is on it now ) but the doctor recommened something else.
At starbucks they sell the chocolate covered coffee beans . I would give my son 1 in the morning to see how it worked. I thought it would make him really hyper. It did not. It had the reverse affect. He was calm he listened and he was able to slow himself down. That might be something you could try. I hope this helps you.

It might be worth talking to your pediatrician about a sensory integration evaluation. My daughter has some of these similar issues. She's 6 now, and it's somewhat better, but also we've learned ways to help her cope ahead of time, and we've learned to avoid a lot of sensory triggers. An occupational therapist might be able to offer some help and strategies. Good luck!

K.

I would suggest that you don't try to decide if your son has ADHD. Instead, try do decide if you think he needs a professional to evaluate him for an issue, any issue, and try not to prejudge what that could be. You may end up with a "no" answer to the only question you ask, and if you don't ask the right question, you might miss something important.

He sounds like a child who does not like bed time (kids get over active when they are tired, it is one way to stimulate themselves and keep going) One school of thought on ADHD is that kids are understimulated and hyper activity is how they attempt to stimulated brain activity. If you had a child who was hyper active, you would see this as a global issue, in many areas of his life and at different times of day.

He may well have a low tolerance of frustration and poor impulse control, and you are his safe person who will love him anyway if he lets it all loose on you. Most 3 year olds have poor ablitiies in this area. He sounds like he has little difficulty showing his anger toward you. I would be watching this myself, and doing all that I could with typical dicipline to guide him to more appropriate experssion of anger. If your good attempts are unsecessful, you may want to look into this with further evaluation.

If he has a tantrum at age 3, that is not unexpected. It would be atypical if the intensity, and the way he reacts when good solid discplinary technicques that are %100 consistently applied for a sustained period of time are unsucessful, despite clear advantages to him to improve. A child who does not respond to typical and consistent dicipline and has tantrums that are over very little, very long, quite frequent, often to the point of vomiting, self injury, or property damage; in a child who is inconsolable and cannot stop even though he understands he should, may have problematic tantrums that need evaluation. Having a tantrum because he was told "no" is a typical reaction for a 3 year old.

Many children do not like loud noises, but children who run crying because of them may have sensory processing issues or auditory defensivness that is not typical. If there are more examples of this issue and you think it is a problem for him, or if it interferes with his life, I would have an Occupational therapist evaluate him.

M.

Play pillow fight with him and let him win unless he becomes too rough then say that ENOUGH. ADHD runs in our family and so I went to an expert to learn about what can be done. Touch is a help. Hugs in the afternoon. Long bedtime routines like bathing before getting into pajamas. Brushing teeth all together as a family. Sitting on your lap while you read a book. Singing him to sleep and also listening to his whole day as he tells you all his troubles.
I also took my troubled child to gymnastics class three times a week.
It takes some effort but if it is ADHD or just a normally developing boy your effort will pay off.

As the parent of a child with ADHD, we saw the signs very early on. What you've described also sounds like our son, but he also had a lot of other things going on -- extreme hyperactivity (literally bounced off the walls day to night, no down time), aggression/impulsiveness, inability to focus or sit still for more than a minute. Check out the website for ADDitude magazine -- it has some checklists that can help you out. There's also an article in their archives about ADHD in preschoolers.

If you have any concerns, trust your gut and start asking for feedback from the medical professionals. I started by asking our pediatrician for advice on managing our son's behavior issues at age three. He knew immediately what we faced was extreme and referred us to a child psychologist for behavioral tips. The process moved on from there.

Good luck!

sound thing sounds like a sensory processing issue, yep

on the food diary, these kind of behaviors have been often described to me as more or less miraculously solved when the right food thing(s) is/are removed from the diet. The internet will probably provide a pretty quick list, but from the old standby of sugar (when we were kids) have been added about a million other possibilities (SIGH). Several different food dyes (not even actual *foods,* just the specific additives) are big name no-no's around here ... I already cook mostly from scratch so don't know if my kids are sensitive (also I've always thought those food dyes tasted nasty anyhow ;) -- I used to eat things with them when I was a kid). So, for example, your brand and flavor of ice pop are pertinent details for a food diary, maybe if a more basic food diary doesn't show any answers right quickly.

Extreme mood swings are generally chemical imbalances, I think, and generally from food intake (or lacks), I think. But, pretty darn significant ones can occur during growth periods because the hormones are all off-balance for growing, by my observation, so you might be seeing a 'phase' (sounds awfully severe, though). I think. Not being a doctor and all that ;).

Good luck :).

Hi T.,

I'm a parent coach, and I specialize in the toddler/preschool years AND medication free treatments for ADD/ADHD. Here is what I think.

Three year olds are the hardest age group I've worked with in my 16+ years! They have mood swings and crazy behavior. I find that having consistent rules is the best course of action. Three year olds are starting to learn acceptable and unacceptable social rules, like is it ok to call Mom stupid? They also learn A LOT!! from TV & friends, so they try it out.

I like to tell kids when they are doing bad, "that's really not ok, do you want to try again?" Since I know they are trying to learn, I give the the chance to learn and redo. Just like a math problem, "nope, it's not right, go back & try again."

As for bedtime, I find that if you miss the bedtime "window" kids become over tired & hyper, I know it sounds crazy, but it's true. Try putting your son to bed 15- 30 minutes earlier.

As for ADD/ADHD, it can be suspected as young at 3, because it is not a disease, but a different way the brain receives, processes and manages information. There are great ways to manage the symptoms without medication, but in your case I think it's more of a case of the 3 year old terrors, instead of ADD/ADHD.

Good Luck!

R. Magby

Hi,

I agree with the others who say an email can't diagnose an issue. I will say that when my son was 2 (he's now 15) I begin to realize that there was something else other than the "He's just a boy," or "he's just spirited". Everyone thought I was wrong and I let it go. He was 4 when my in-laws told me I wasn't disciplining him enough, he was 6 when my sister in-law blamed me (yet again) that she couldn't get him to listen when she had him over. He was 8 when I finally went to my doctor in tears. I know that wouldn't have been able to diagnose ADHD back when he was 2, but I wish I had brought it up sooner with my doctor. My son is 15 and still struggles in school, but he has made significantly large steps and I'm quite proud of him.

Long story short, trust your gut and go see your doctor. I know that ADHD has different levels of severity, but I just remember to keep your mind open that it may be something more sensory or something else altogether.

he sounds very much like my DD, who is 3 as well. I do think it is part of their age. Certainly kids can start exhibiting signs very young. While I am a big proponent of finding and treating those kids that really need it, I personally feel as if we overdiagnose kids...in that we don't look for other solutions or causes. PP had a good point about possible environmental factors....but it could be a food thing too. Maybe keeping a food diary will show the behavior follows specific food or food combinations.

My best advice, though, is to check out this book.
http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Percept...
Its Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. It is the best book I have ever read, hands down. It is a really positive approach to parenting, talking about revising labels, adjusting your response, offering support, focusing on reward and coaching. It is a very positive and empowering book and REALLY helped me to understand how to approach my spirited child. I need to re-read, as things are less nice as they once were. She also wrote another one calld Kids Parents and Power Struggles that I began to read but have not yet finished.

Definitely talk to your pediatrician if you are concerned, and follow your mama gut. Mama gut is very reliable :) But there may be other ways of dealing with the behavior issues other than 'diagnosing' or medicating. Maybe he is lacking in a vitamin? Perhaps seeing a naturopathic doctor might offer some guidance.

As to the specific sleep issues, we are going through this as well. I have talked with DDs pedi and we are going to try her on a melatonin supplement. Melatonin is a natural production that supervises your sleep cycles. Some people just don't have good natural levels of melatonin. What happened for my nephew is that after he took melatonin for awhile his body was able to adjust to those necessary levels. He now doesn't take it every day, just on an extra full day, or something like that where his brain has trouble shutting down. I'm hoping this will be the case with DD, along with age..she tells me that she has so many things in her head it makes her brain jump so she can't sleep :) Now that it is summer and she will be with my mom instead of daycare and preschool, we are going to give it a go. She has a very fast metabolism so wanted someone I trusted to be able to watch for any side effects or grogginess.

Good luck!!!

I don't think you are parnoid, I think its worth looking into...from a mom's perspective my son absolutely turns into what you are describing when he has any sugar (or variant thereof...high fructose corn syrup or artificial sweeteners etc..) and has that behavior for up to 3 days after. He makes poor choices and is just an emotional mess, can't concentrate, you name it. Speaking from my profesional side (I'm a naturopathic doctor) and this is also in line with food allergies. Your child may have different ones that my son's of course, but children and food and behavior go hand in hand. I see this all the time in my practice. I would strongly urge you to find a naturopath in your area to seek guidance and testing from/regarding this. I just want you to know you aren't crazy and you have options. ADD/ADHD is modified or cured with naturopathic methods. The mainstream medical doesn't advocate this (I don't feel), but again, its seen all the time in an ND's practice. Most insurance plans in WA cover ND visits.

He is pretty young to be diagnosing anything, but in my opinion, this doesn't sound like ADHD.... the angry fits/words, the not liking loud noises, etc. sounds like something totally different... maybe a form of autism? There are a lot of syndromes that have the same symptoms as ADHD, which is why its so widely over-diagnosed. If you're really concerned, get him into a Dr. or better yet, a play therapist. Go with your gutt either way... if you have a feeling something just isn't right... it's probably not. He's your baby... you know him better than anyone. But keep in mind, any diagnosis... no matter what it is... is not the end of the world. No matter what you might find out, you are doing your son and your family a favor by seeking treatment, even if you don't all want the answer you may get, be it ADHD or something else.

I would start by talking to his dr about your concerns. Does he have other diversions to noise? Write down all the behaviors that happen and make sure you have that list when talking to his dr. Your concerns are valid and I would use you mommy intuition. It could be just a phase. He is pretty young to be diagnosed with adhd, they often times can not diagnose that until the age of 6ish, give or take. My brother is a development specialist and he has told me a really good website to look at for adhd, is www.chadd.net. I wish for the best for you and how you can figure it out!! GOOD LUCK.. Being a parent is so hard!

Could be normal, or a bunch of other things. Is your son very picky about food and textures? Is he clumsy? Is he very literal? If these sound familiar then aspergers comes to mind, but goodness knows it could be mere anxiety, or nothing at all!

Is he over tired at bedtime? That alone could cause what you describe. Does the hyper activity coincide with any products you use for cleaning? For example after you have just cleaned the bathtub? Or kitchen countertops? I would strongly recommend (if you haven't already) emptying your house of the "regular" cleaners and going non-toxic. Here is a link:
http://www.shaklee.net/healinghappens/getclean/index

I would be concerned if I were you and it sounds like you are. But I would be looking at things like his childcare, other kids around him, other adults around him, possible family situations that could be making him act out. Basically finding out why he is angry rather than attributing it to ADD. He may have ADD, but it sounds like he is reacting to something that he is mad about. If oyu are concerned about ADD, you can contact a specialist, but be wary because too many kids are put of meds at such an early age because they are not acting the way we'd like them to behave. You may want to read Unconditional Parenting or Playful Parenting to find other ways to deal with his tantrums other than just "no". But I know this can be hard, but I think it's important to not just disregard his feelings of anger as "a stage", he deserves respect & understanding that something is obviously really bothering him that he feels is important enough to say these things in response to. Good luck with everything and hang in there!

Hi T., there is no way that anyone could or should diagnose your son over an email and at age three only very severe cases of ADHD are diagnosed at all.

I think that its important to listen to your own intuition. He may very well have very sensitive hearing, difficulty with transitions, and a quick temper but getting some professional eyes on the situation will hopefully help to give you guidance and ease your mind.

By the way, my son has many of these same issues and lots more, and he was diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum when he was 9 years old. I'm not saying that to scare you, but to let you know that its something to take seriously when you have that "Something is not right" feeling.

All the best, K. D.

You might also want to research Sensory Processing Disorder . . . your reference to intolerance to loud noises made me think of that issue.

Though SPD isn't necessarily related to food, most of my son's sensory issues disappeared when we took him off gluten (wheat, rye, barley).

Doesn't work for everyone (and may have nothing to do with your son) but it really helped us. I would have never believed it if I hadn't seen it for myself.

Good luck to you.

No, this sounds like totally normal behaviour for a three-year-old. Depending on the day, my three-year-old son runs through the house screaming every time I turn on the vacuum. My 10-month-old twins hardly flinch, so it's definitely an age thing. Also, regarding the bedtime, I think you are putting him to bed just a tad too late - maybe try moving up his bedtime a half hour so that he's ready to go down when he's yawning instead of catching that second wind and getting "stupid tired" as we like to say around here. If we miss our son's "tired time" by just 20 minutes, he gets hyper and silly like this instead of going to bed and falling asleep when we know he is completely exhausted. It's almost like their nerves are going crazy when kids are overtired and they start to get extremely hyper and act out and get physical. Hope that helps.

Sounds like things each of my 3 kids have done. Things that help:
Little (1 hr/day) to no screen time: TV or computer (screen time over-stimulates the brain)
Regular food times
Healthy foods (my kids also have allergies, so we need to be sure to avoid those foods or their behavior is awful!)
Routines
Outside time daily if at all possible -- need the fresh air, daylight and exercise -- even if raining (that's what boots and rain coats are for!) ;)
Plenty of rest -- even if not sleeping at nap time, must have quiet time (1 hour works for us and time is added if noisy (5 min) or out of bed (10 min))

Those are the major ones that come to mind right now. Let me know if you have any questions.
Good luck and hang in there!