Seeking Advice - Yonkers,NY

Updated on May 11, 2007
D.H. asks from Yonkers, NY
31 answers

My 9 year old daughter hates to read, she said it's very boring. I tried my best to tell her that reading is fun, and that's where knowledge increases. I told her that it is very important and essential to be able to read in today's society because this will determine her future. I get people to talk to her, allow her to interact with her age group while they also encourage her, but not success. I am worried for her.

What can I do next?

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R.H.

answers from New York on

I went through the same thing right around the same age.
We went out and bought the Chicken Soup books and she loved them. You may want to try that.
They have a nice selection for that age range.

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T.S.

answers from New York on

depending on where you live you could get her some extra help with her reading.. usually when a child says i hate reading its because there is an underlying problem. not reading well or not understanding what is being read. I went through the same thing throughout childhood and still have a hard time reading. there may be websites of programs such as sylvan or kumon centers. you can also talk to a teacher at school and they can steer you in the right direction.
hope i have helped
good luck
T.

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M.B.

answers from New York on

What is her interest, maybe she can read on subjects that interest her. Judy Bloom books are good. There are also the "babysitter club" books too. Any type of fictional young girl reading books may catch her attention. What about comic books?

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M.R.

answers from New York on

Maybe you could encourage her to write / create / draw stories and let other people read them so she can see the power of reading. Reading is fundamental to every thing that we do in life. It's as simple as that.

I traveled to Paris a few years ago and witnessed a woman who was unable to read street signs because she couldn't read and people had no empathy for her.

Get your older child to read with her and to her.

In this day and time you have to put your foot down about the reading because if you don't she will be illiterate. I have a 45 year old cousin who is illiterate and she is a mess because of it. She has a job but is unable to advance because of her handicap. I don't mean to be so dramatic but it is very serious.

Get her involved with Reading is Fundamental and First Book. I am looking into starting a First Book chapter in Brooklyn.

My daughter is almost 4 and loves books because I read to her from the womb. Now I have to have the patience to teach her to read.

Don't be discouraged. Thanks for sharing your issue. You have the power to turn this around.

Good luck.

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K.W.

answers from New York on

Plan an afternoon at the library. Let her wander off into the kids section. She will find something she likes and see other kids interested in reading.
The act of getting her own library card and checking out as many books as she likes might spark some interest.
Good luck.

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S.H.

answers from New York on

maybe u should try audio and visual reading for her something that help her interact with what she is doing. Hope this helps

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M.S.

answers from New York on

What are your daughter's interests? When my son was younger (he is now 14) he loved the "Nickelodean" channel, so I got him a subscription to the magazine. He would read joyfully! Once he got older and got into sports, I subscribed him to "Sports Illustrated For Kids", then later "Teen Sports Illustrated", and anything that relates to basketball. My daughter (who is now 20) loved fashion, so I subscribed her to "Teen Glamour". Also, I would take them on a monthly visit to Barnes and Noble and let them pick out whatever book they wanted, and I found that they would actually read them! My son is now an avid basketball player, and my daughter is a fashion diva! (smile)

Hope this helps!

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L.A.

answers from New York on

I have the opposite with my almost 8 year old. She reads to the point where her head is in the clouds. Has your daughter tried to read the Junie B Jones books? They are a fast and quite funny read. Ramona books are great too! Those would be my suggestion based on what my daughter reads. Good Luck!

L.

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K.J.

answers from New York on

Hi D., In reading some of your other responses, I would only re-iterate to be sure that she doesn't have any sort of medical problems and if that is not an issue, then find topics that she is interested in and let her read about those things in addition to whatever the school is advising her to read. Even though my daughter is an avid reader and always has been, when she was around the same age she was VERY bored with what the school had listed for her age group as "required" reading. I spoke with her teachers and was encouraged to let her read above her level. I got a copy of the middle school required reading list and got her some of the books on it and she just dove right in to them. I am an avid reader, so her seeing me read all the time was a big help. The only problem with this is that I enjoy reading Dean Koontz books, which are a little twisted and bizarre. By the time she got to middle school, we had run out of things for her to read that were "required" for her age group. Again, I went to her teachers and was told to let her read anything she wanted. So I introduced her to Dean Koontz with the understanding that she was only allowed to read the ones that I had already read and felt were appropriate for her to read. In addition to these books, she has read the Harry Potter series of books about 3 times now, and there are some other series books that I have that she has read multiple times.
Sorry this got a little long. Talk to her teachers and talk to her, she could just be bored with what she has to read and simply needs more of a challenge in her reading.
Good luck,
K.

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C.C.

answers from New York on

Hi, try taking her to a book store or library and let her pick books she would like to take home and read, I am almost positive she will find some interesting book.

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J.D.

answers from New York on

My daughter didn't want to read in first grade. Turns out she needed glasses for lazy eye. Once that problem was fixed, she read much more easily but still didn't like to read. Then she got hooked on Harry Potter. She plowed through all the books in that series, although they were way above her reading level at first. Now in third grade she's an avid reader. So I'd recommend having her eyes checked if you haven't (I can't believe we missed that one!), and then try to find a great series that she can get drawn into; there are lots of good ones out there. Good luck!

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L.L.

answers from Lancaster on

D.,

I grew up loving to read, which I think I got from my mother who read books every night before bed. My oldest daughter grew up with the same love of reading, and read so many books in school that she won weekly awards. My youngest daughter however hated to read. Once I was sure in her early years that there was no learning problem, I too tried everything to encourage her and show her how much fun books could be. She is now 17 and still hates reading and has read only three books in her life all the way through. I have come to the conclusion that she just isn't going to have the passion for it that her sister and I do. Your daughter may yet find books interesting, there are so many series out for young girls now. It may just be a matter of finding the right thing to interest her. Take her to a book store and try all different subjects in her age range. Good luck, I hope she finds the passion that alot of us have for reading, but it just might not be "her thing".

L.

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D.D.

answers from New York on

Don't be too worried about her reading habits, I didn't start reading avidly until I was about 13 or 14, now you'll never find me without a book. It may also be a good idea to take her to the local book store and have her pick out young adult books, I started with Sweet Valley High, progressed into Romance novels and now I read anything that I can get my hands on. Comic books are also a very good jump off point. Remember too that kids pick up what they see going on around them so it may also be a good idea to pick up a book for yourself and try to share reading time with your daughter, pick up a book read to her and have her read to you, have her read to the baby (this could take care of two birds at a time), and try not to push the issue, 20 minutes a day. Let her read what she likes it may make all the difference.

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M.D.

answers from New York on

May be their is an after school program in you're child's school. You might be able to sign her in a reading program their. It's inportant for her. Keep inspiering her .I hope I he;ped you a little.

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R.D.

answers from New York on

HI D. - both my son & daughter were the same way but I started taking them to the library and let them pick out their own reading (with supervision of course) and it seems they preferred that over being told what they HAD to read and today they are both adults and love to read. Of course they did have to read the books from the school and in time they were ok with it - they still complained but knowing that they could read other things helped. Also, the library the next town over had alot of kid groups which also got them active and sharing ideas and books - you may want to check if you library has any programs for kids as well. Best of Luck.

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C.S.

answers from New York on

Hi

I know that the public library in Montclair NJ has a special program for kids who don't like to read. I don't much about it but may be is worth finding out if the library in your town has a similar program.

C.

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K.K.

answers from New York on

1. You should read in front of your daughter (family reading time, for example, where everyone reads quietly for 30 mins). Then have a few minutes where everyone can talk about what they are reading.

2. Make sure that you have reading materials she likes around the house. It doesn't even need to be what are considered literary books. If she likes certain magazines, for example, have some of those around.

3. Go to the library together and let her pick out as many books as she wants on any topic she likes.

4. Go to a play or a movie together, then to a bookstore, and pick out a book (at her level, so she doesn't get discouraged) on the same subject.

5. Try writing a story together. Supplement the story with photographs she takes, or drawings she makes.

6. Try writing a song together, and performing it for the family.

If you tell her reading is "important and essential" it makes it seem so boring! Make it fun!

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K.M.

answers from New York on

Do you know if maybe she is Dislexic? I may have screwed up the spelling. She could just be having a really hard time reading rather than being bored with it.

Or, she could just in fact be terribly bored with it. There are a trillion topics out there. Does she know she can read about anything she wants? Maybe she'd be more in to true stories. If she's in to music or fashion, there are biographies out there by musicians (I know Cher has one) and fashion designers, models, dancing, hip hop, etc.

I'm definately one of those who finds some reading boring. I don't like narratives, novels and what not. But, I am in to researching things I don't know about and am interested in such as starting a non-profit, health & fitness, etc.

If you could spot a few things she's interested in and then get her to "research" topics rather than READ, it could make her approach it as fun rather than work.

Promise her that each time she's finished a book, or "researching", you and her will go out to dinner together and talk about her findings. Yes, reading is super important but it's also crutial she knows how to articulate and communicate what she knows. It will encourage critical thinking which, to me, is more important than reading a 300 page book in a night.

Have fun!

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T.W.

answers from New York on

I was the same way and didn't change until, believe it or not, college, when I found Danielle Steele was the best romance novelist. My mother had a tutor come over all summer long and used reading as a means of punishment, don't do that, instead a) make sure your daughter does not have a learning disability (like dyslexia, which I have and didn't find out about it until college) and b) let her read only when she has to do so for school. If you force it, she will only hate it more like I did and it will ruin her. Don't make the same mistakes my mother did, instead let her come around on her own, and she will if you handle it right. I read only things that interest me, otherwise if it goes in one ear and out the other, without any comprehension. I now am a mother of 5 and am in nursing school so I have to read an awful lot. I hope I was of some help.Good luck.
Hugs,
T.

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E.B.

answers from New York on

i understand your concern but as long as she CAN read i wouldn't worry about her not WANTING to read. As hard as it is for people who love to read, some of us just don't enjoy it. I didn't as a child & I still don't. Try not to make such a big deal of it,she'll have to read some books for school that she'll really like & that might spur her on to reading when she's a little older.

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T.L.

answers from New York on

Maybe get a book and have like a play. Have her act it out or while she is reading have someone act out the part. I know my girls like that . hope that works
T. L

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A.G.

answers from New York on

What is she interested in? Find a book about something she likes to do, or something she likes to learn about. It might help her stay focused, and see that reading can be fun.

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M.G.

answers from New York on

Has she been evaluated by the school or doctors to see if she has any problem reading? It could be something simple like eyesight or something. I would start there, by either starting with the pediatrician or asking for the school's child study team to evaluate her.

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C.M.

answers from New York on

I had a younger brother who was like this. He hated to read. Once he learned it could be enjoyable as well as educational, he became an avid reader and even began writing imaginative stories.
It took some work and patience to get him that far and you've already been given excellent advice. Read aloud together, a chapter each. Use voices and accents, maybe even try some of the older children's books that include some pictures so she can visualize the scene better. They make puzzle books as well (find your path books) which are sort of interactive. The reader has to make a decision at the end of every chapter and turn to the corresponding page so you never get the same story twice. These really worked for my brother. Try to get books on subjects she's interested in. What do 9 year old girls like these days? Also, you can try some books that have been made into movies (Harry Potter, Charlotte's Web). Let her watch the movie first and then read the book. It may make it easier to read knowing it won't be boring. Plus, so much action is left out of the movie so that can make the book even more interesting. Above all, be patient and don't give up. It's important to tell her how important reading is but it also counts alot more if you can show her it can be enjoyable as well. Good luck. Let us know how it goes.

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Q.F.

answers from New York on

D.,
Hi, i myself had this problem around her age, even throughout highschool and even now! i could read, i wasn't illiterate, but i just COULDN'T read anything that was assigned, i would get MAYBE through a paragraph, and i'd either have to re-read it over and over again because it just wouldn't stick in my mind, OR i'd be passed out face in the book because it was just sooooo boring! one i hit middleschool i was lucky enough to have teachers from yr to yr who understood my problem and allowed me to help in choosing SOME of the reading by giving me a list of appropriate books. Since i loved the outsiders, that was 1 book i had NO problem reading at all! i also read the R.L. Stine books...i started with the goosebump books, and they now have the rotten school books http://www.rlstine.com/rotten_school/home.php they seem interesting. and there are MANY other books that he does that are very interesting for older kids all the way up to the "tweens". but it all depends on her interests. i would suggest asking her what she's interested in! try bringing her into the library and having her look throught the r.l. stine section and have her read the back of the books and ask her if any of it interests her....it couldn't hurt, and MAYBE she'll find a new interest! like i said, i have always had problems reading books, but when i find something in a subject that i like, i can sometimes read a book in just 1 day. good luck in finding something, and if your lucky, she'll find an author that hits the spot for her! just remember, if it's interesting for her, it may make her interested in reading! GOOD LUCK! i hope that my suggestion works, if not, i hope that someone else's suggestions help! keep us updated.

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D.

answers from New York on

Have you tried reading with her. Pick some fun books, like Charlotte's Web or the Harry Potter series and read them together before she goes to bed every night. Make it a ritual that the 2 of you share together. Take turns reading to each other. And discuss what you have read. Talk about what you think the scenes look like, or how the characters feel. After a while let her pick the books. We have been reading to my son since the day he was born and he loves books. He goes to the library 2 days a week for play groups and he's even in a monthly book club. Keep it light and fun.

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V.S.

answers from New York on

D.,

I truly believe that finding joy in reading starts when they are infants. We read to our kids from birth. That said, my 16y/o hated to read ad she grew up. She would fail her summer reading projects rather than pick up a book. I began to get her involved in reading by having her read recipes while working in the kitchen with me. Then she began reading children's' books to her younger sister. The turning point happened at about your daughter's age. She was assigned to read "old Yeller" for her summer report. I read a chapter aloud to her, (using accents and sound effects.) next, she read a chapter to me. It was the first book she read that touched her emotionally and took her outside herself to other places. We read that book together, two chapters a day. She realized that there is joy in reading,and hasn't been seen without a book in her hands since.

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C.C.

answers from New York on

I have a 9 yr. old with the same issues. I brought her AUDIO BOOKS. Problem SOLVED!!!!!! She now enjoys it! Good Luck !

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P.C.

answers from New York on

Hi D.,
Before I became a Stay-At-Home mom, who works from home, I worked in an elementary school and saw a lot of children who felt the same way about reading. My suggestion to you is to find something....anything that interests your daughter to read about. Even if it is a kid's magazine or newspaper. As long as she is reading something it will help. Also, try reading some together. Even if you read her a chapter a night of a book that interests her. Her hearing you read will also help. Who know's maybe she will become interested. I know when I was a child, I didn't like reading very much and now I love it.
Hope this helps.
P.

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M.B.

answers from New York on

I have a child who hates to read as well --she is 14. I read with her still. Many times children who do not like to read have difficulty reading and are embarassed. My daughter has a language processing issue. I would rule out any difficulty. I would then make it my mission to find magazines or a specific series of books that she likes. Sometimes downloading the book or books on tape will help. Just make sure she is following the print version.

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D.S.

answers from New York on

Does she have any special interests. At that age I loved suspense books so I read all of the R.L. Stine series like the "goosebumps" series and the "fear street" series. I loved them. At around age 8 I loved the Ramona books also which she might enjoy too, may start by reading a page out loud with her and then asking her to read a page. What about Harry Potter books also. Good Luck!

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