SAHM / Wahms: When Do You Send Your Child to Daycare?

A two year old doesn't really need socialization. They mostly parallel-play at this age, anyway. There is a reason that preschools don't start until 3 at the earliest, and daycare is absolutely unnecessary to the child. It sounds to me like you are doing everything right.

My son is 2 1/2, and he will likely never be in daycare. What you describe is plenty of healthy socialization. I don't believe daycare is a place for socialization. I believe it's a place where children go when parents work. You daughter is getting plenty of socialization. There is no reason for her to need time "away from her family."

3 is fine. Later than that is OK too.
Better to learn now that "nudges" from others need to be mostly ignored....you know what's best for your child!

I think that you decide how much interaction she needs. I think that if she does MyGym, storytime and the playground, she's meeting other kids and doing social things. My DD has been home with me from 18 months and she will be 3.5 soon. She goes to Meet Ups/storytime/playground/friend's house at least once a week. I think that your DD gets plenty of kid-time, IMO. She doesn't need to be away from family if you don't want her to be.

Give me a break, you're doing fine. She does NOT need to be in daycare. You're doing plenty of socialization! Why would they tell you this? She can go to preschool at 3 or honestly even 4. But I sent my girls both at 3. They did only 2 days a week, 2 hours each time at 3. My 4 yo is now in full day pre-K, 9-3 5 days a week and absolutely loving it. 5 yo is in kindergarten and also loves school.

Daycare is for children that their parents or family members can't watch them. There is no reason to send your child to daycare for socialization. I started both my boys in a preschool at 3 years old, 2 times a week for three hours. At 4 they went 3-4 times a week for 3 hours. This was plenty! I agree with the others, get used to standing up for what you know is right for your child. EVERYONE has an opinion.

No, it's not "time." The activities she's already doing are plenty for her age. Ignore the nudgers.

My three girls have/will go to part-time preschool when their four; the year before kindergarten to get them used to the structure and being away from me.

I've always viewed daycare as something parents that work outside the home utilize. If you and your daughter are happy with the way things are, then leave them be! There is OODLES of time for her to be around other kids, learning bad habbits and behaviours, picking up innappropriate language.....I say you spend as MUCH time with her as you can while you can...before school makes being apart mandatory. I can tell you that I feel a little sad everyday when I drop my oldest off at school.

If you don't need a babysitter, why spend the money on daycare? When she is 3 years old, put her in preschool. She's getting plenty of socialization from the other stuff you do and being with family is great for her.

The only thing I would wonder is whether your M. is getting worn out and doesn't want to watch her every day anymore. Maybe she feels guilty about it and doesn't want to tell you. Maybe she has hinted to others. If it was me, I'd bring it up with her and talk openly about it, making sure she knows it's ok to say she doesn't want to watch her every day anymore. I know a lot of grandparents who watch the kids daily and they do get worn out after a couple of years of it.

Anyway, if your M. is happy with the arrangement, skip daycare. All you're going to get from it is a kid who comes home sick all the time. : ) Stick with what you have and keep socializing her in other ways.

I don't personally believe she needs to be away from family at all. So long as she's getting some time around other people, Kindergarten is soon enough. What's the hurry anyway?

When my older son was that age we had 3 morning commitments: a class at the YMCA, a class at the park district and a play group. I thought it was very healthy for him to be doing those things. When he was 3 he began preschool. It was a transition, as I was a SAHM at the time, but it was so good for him. The first couple of weeks were hard, but he loved it.

He is now in kindergarten. His younger brother is almost 3. I started working full-time last fall when little brother was 2 1/2. He is in daycare full time and doing great!!!

You have to do what works for you and your child. I believe it is your responsibilty to help him grow both academically (age appropriate, of course), emotionally, socially, etc. MyGym, storytime, playground, etc., sounds great! She is just a little over two, so that is just so age appropriate. I really would consider preschool next fall. It doesn't have to be everyday. My son went 2 mornings a week. It's just such a great way for them to grow socially without Mommy there. They learn to play more cooperatively, negotiate, listen to an adult who is not Mommy. It's just such an amazing experience.

If you don't need her to be in daycare and she is getting socialization, then don't put her in daycare. You could consider some sort of preschool next year but not daycare.

When she is older is fine.
But I would consider Preschool, not Daycare.

Just say "oh whatever..." to those that nag you or meddle.
This is your child.

3-4 is a good age. Because by then, then they are developmentally at a different phase of life and can really benefit from other children and they are eager as well.
But go by your child's cues as well.
Every kid is different. And developmentally.

I personally think she's benefitting much more from time around you guys than time in childcare at that age. At that age they need nurture from loving adults more than they need socialization. I didn't put my kids in preschool until the year before kindergarten, age 4, and they are very well-adjusted and socialized kids. We did attend regular playgroups and activities with other children, and it sounds like you're doing that some too. But I wouldn't worry. It sounds like a great situation for her and for you adults (grandma gets to love on her, she gets to be with people who care about her like no one else does, and you guys get to save money). If you do end up needing to send her to preschool/daycare, I wouldn't worry about that either. She'll have fun there.

My daughter started preschool at age 3. She went two days a week. That was plenty for socialization. Now that she is 4, she attends 4 days per week. We personally felt that 3 was a great age for it and wouldn't have done it any earlier. The preschool just sent a flier home inviting our youngest to join at age 2 but we feel that she is too young (she turns 2 in April) and plan on enrolling her at age 3.

Personally, our WAHD answer, not having such a convenient grandma, was 18 months, when the kid was too active to let Dad actually work. If you don't need the "daycare" aspect then, as others have said, whatever you want to do with preschool. We found that structure was good for our son and he learned a lot.

But I'm a little concerned with your statement that she's "never" been in in a situation where her parents or grandma was not around. Literally? Or just as a daily arrangement? If you literally mean she's never been away, that I'd definitely work on before she's 3. That's a kind of socialization too, and important for everyone's well-being :-)

It sounds like you do plenty of activities outside the home that allow her to interact with other kids. I did sign my son up for a M.'s Day Out class one morning per week when he was 18 months old. It was only for about 3 hours. He absolutely loved it and it taught him a lot of pre-school skills like sitting quietly with a group as the teacher read stories aloud or sang songs. He had art time and free play time. He just enjoyed it so much. My daughter started in the infant room at 12 months old. She too enjoyed it. She had more of a separation anxiety issue for a little bit, but I think it helped her learn that I wasn't abandoning her. And it was good for me to learn my kids will be ok being without me for a few hours. My son is now 4 and my daughter is almost 3. They both attend preschool a couple mornings per week. They just devour it. They get a block of time to play, do art, engage in musical activities and cook. They even learn concepts that will prepare them for kindergarten.
I think you should listen to your gut and follow your daughter's lead. Waiting until she is 3 years old to involve her in a daycare/preschool type setting is just fine. I agree with Bug, though, I don't think all daycares are created equal. I would look for one that is going to embrace skills that will get kids ready for their school age years. Some daycares don't always teach anything purposefully.
HTH,
A.

There's no hurry to send her off to be with other kids. Sounds like she's getting that already at the places you already take her to. Preschool at age 3, for two days a week will be enough .

Find a Mothers Day Out program that goes along with the hours you are thinking of. One of the ones in my town in M, W, and F from 10am-3pm. The other one is T and Th from 9am-noon. The full day you bring them a sack lunch and they take a nap, the half day one they eat lunch at home and only play and do fun stuff.

Hope this helps you. Will not be giving you a direct answer, just my experiences. My oldest child was with me and having fun till he went to kindergarten at age 5. What happened is the other kids were so far ahead of him cause they had all gone to preschool. When my second son was born, put him in preschool at age 3.5. He did very well and was up to speed with the other kids when entering kindergarten. I did love having them at home till age 5, however, found it more helpful to them and their self-esteem and confidence to go to preschool. Age 3 worked for me. It was half a day. When he was 4 let him go for 5 hours. He was ready. Depends on the child. My last child went to nursery school at age 2 cause I had to go to work. He turned out to be more independent, self-confident and a higher self-esteem than the older two. My boys are now 44, 42 and 37. Good luck with your choice. Enjoy each day, it passes like a blink of the eye.