Rocking & Hitting Head on wall...how Do We Stop This?

Updated on March 30, 2008
T.H. asks from Elgin, MN
29 answers

I have a 2 year old son who, when he wakes up from a nap, he will rock back and forth, hitting his head on his wall. He has now put a hole in his wall from constant rocking. He also rocks when he is in his highchair or on the couch when he gets tired or furstrated. It is almost like he is trying to calm himself. We have asked his Dr. and County Nurse about this behavior and no one shows any concern and says he will stop doing it eventually. But now that he has put a hole in his wall we really need to STOP this! Does anyone have an experience with this? Ideas on how to get him to stop? We are trying to teach him to knock on his door when he wakes up. This is how he tells us he is awake and ready to come out is by rocking/banging his head on the wall. He is a very smart little boy and shows no other developmental delays such as Autism. Any suggestions?

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

Featured Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm going to be in the minority here it looks like, but I wouldn't panic about autism if he doesn't have any other symptoms or developmental delays. My brother did this at that age to the point where he was able to move his crib across the room from pounding his head so hard. He is now high strung, but very normal. At the time there really wasn't such a thing as "sensory integration disorder," but I know now that's probaby what it was and my brother had other symptoms as a child that we thought were just his idiosyncracies--no tags on his clothes, only cotton clothes, no strings in his socks, etc. I would have him evaluated for sensory issues. The pounding is how those kids soothe themselves. My oldest went through sensory integration therapy at age 5 and it was very helpful. There are some good books out there too on sensory integration issues. Good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

What about leaving his door ajar so he can call to you when he wakes up, or tying a bell to the crib so he can shake it when he gets up. I would try another pediatrician, too - just in case there is something more going on. I'd also start monitoring his naps more closely, listening for sounds of waking and try to preempt his head banging. Go in happy, saying something like, "Hi! You're awake! Good boy for not hitting the wall - now ring the bell for Mommy" (or some such) in an attempt to give him positive feedback on what you find an acceptable way to call to you when he needs you.

SAHM of seven, most with special needs

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.H.

answers from Green Bay on

Hi T.,
We have kitty names Feelix too!
My son used to have more violent tantrums than made sense. We took him off artificial colors and flavors, it helped. Another thought is to give him something to jump on or spin with. My first thought was Autism. By the way you can still be bright and have Autism. I also have a business from home. A friend of mine has a Spa business and is with my company now.
Health and Blessings,
S.
http://www.YesToSuccess.net/S.
helping families with health and wealth for over 11 years.

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

I think he could be scared. Little ones have trouble telling their feelings to us. It may scare him to be shut in his room. My daughter freaks out when she is put in timeout in her room. She will throw herself down without any concern that she is hurting herself by banging her head on the floor or wall. She doesn't normally do those things, but when she is upset she hits the walls. And you said that it is when he is frustraed that he rocks on the couch or chair? I would try leaving his door open. If you are concerned about him leaving his room and finding trouble when you are still sleeping, put up a baby gate that he can still see through. He may have tried calling you, and with the door closed you do not hear immediately, and then he gets frustrated and starts banging his head? Just a few thoughts...

2 moms found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi T.
I would have your son tested for sensory defensivness to see if he has a mild case of that. my daughter did the same thing until she started going to PT therpy once a week now we can just do a home program to manage. He may have others weird qurks that you haven't thought of until asked in the eval. hope this helps T.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Your son might be a kinesthetic type of child that soothes himself by rocking or repetitive motion. My daughter is 4 1/2 yrs and still does the rocking thing. She used to bounce in her crib SO much that the crib actually gave way and crashed.

Anyhow, show him a different way to soothe himself as in a rocking chair. This will give him the same motion he seeks and yet he won't hurt himself.

I say that I'm going to get my daughter a job with Lazy-Boy as a tester... she give out recliner/rocker a run for its money. ; )

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

HI T.
I am a physical therapist with 20 years of experience. I personally do not work with peds but know lots of OT's, massage therapists, and PT's who do. I have 7 children myself and have not had one with this problem yet. However, during the birthing process, the head is compressed greatly and typically naturally reflexes back into position but often some of the cranial bones get jammed and cause increased pressure on the fluid and brain tissue in the skull. This could also happen if your child had a fall on his head since birth. His body could be telling you that he wants this pressure released as his brain is growing and needs the room. Some Autisms typically show up around age 3 and also could be, in some cases, the result of this. Young children who suffer from may even develop migraines. It is a simple, gentle, success proven method to release the cranial bones to allow for proper movement. Go to www.upledger.com, a cranial sacral therapy approach website, and look for a therapist (massage, physical, or occupational) in your area and get him evaluated. He may not respond well until he gets aquainted with the therapist but any good therapist will give you techniques you can do for him while he is sleeping. The results could be amazingly quick....possibly even in a couple visits. Make sure the therapist has some pediatric experience. GOOD LUCK and I hope this helps. Anything is better than pumping drugs down his little body!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.D.

answers from Grand Forks on

My little cousin did things like this for the first 5 yrs of his life. Eventually through psychiatrists, etc they found out that he has ODD and ADHD. ODD is what causes the rocking, etc in his situation. It is Oppositional Dysfunction Disorder (I believe). There is a medication that may work, but otherwise a lot of it is his surroundings and how he is handled mentally and physically. It is a tough road, but he is getting a little better with time. I would ask for a referral to a specialist or behavioral health. Hope this helps a little.
T. Dahl

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

T.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi T.,
I copied this from a "autism fact sheet"
"Many children with autism engage in repetitive movements such as rocking and twirling, or in self-abusive behavior such as biting or head-banging.Many children with autism have a reduced sensitivity to pain, but are abnormally sensitive to sound, touch, or other sensory stimulation.Children with some symptoms of autism, but not enough to be diagnosed with classical autism, are often diagnosed with PDD-NOS. Children with autistic behaviors but well-developed language skills are often diagnosed with Asperger syndrome. Children who develop normally and then suddenly deteriorate between the ages of 3 to 10 years and show marked autistic behaviors may be diagnosed with childhood disintegrative disorder."

It might be prudent to have your son checked out by a children's developmental specialist. I have had bad luck twice with a regular Peds telling me things were OK and then a specialist finding something that was very NOT OK. I took my son and daughter both to specialists when my gut was telling me something was not quite right and my peds said everything was fine. Both times I was correct, and they got the intervention that they needed. It usually takes a long time to get in, so make the appt and then you can cancel if you need to. Better to be safe than sorry, early intervention and treatment is the key! If you go and everything is fine then that is wonderful, if you go and not everything is fine then it's wonderful your child will get early intervention. It's a win win. good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

J.R.

answers from Eau Claire on

Hi T.,

My son also banged his head when he was 2. He would bang it on the woodwork, floor, crib, and anything else around. I was really worried, but the doctor reassured me it was normal and he wouldn't hurt himself. He eventually stopped within the year. He is now 14 and terrific! My advice is to ignore it. Patch the wall when he stops!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

D.S.

answers from Omaha on

T.,

Okay, my answer is going to be a bit different from the others.

I dont have children who do this, but I did this same thing until I was in, like 5th grade. I would be on all fours and rock my entire body gently forward and back bumping my head just a bit on the headboard. My mom said I had a huge bald spot forever from it. I would also rock back and forth while sitting in the car or on the couch. I am just a "mover", even to this day!! it's soothing to me. Up until college I would lay on my side hug a pillow and rock my entire body gently side to side to fall asleep! I only stopped as an adult when I started sharing my bed with others (if ya know what I mean!). My advice, of course have him evaluated (the sensory intergration thing might be someting to look at) but if they dont seem too concerned, then leave it alone. I grew up (mostly) normal :), have my masters degree and am reasonably intelligent. It might be nothing more then he is just a mover! Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.M.

answers from Appleton on

I would ignore it. If you make a big fuss about something, the child will most likely continue it or do it more. Explain that you don't understand the rocking/hitting his head on the wall to mean anything at all, only that you understand the knocking on the door and that it means he's awake.

Or give him something different altogether to signal he's awake. Like a bell or a toy/book that makes noise? This may take time, but may also break him of the habit he seems to have of hitting his head. Save the item only for when he's awake, not letting him play with it during the day risking him getting sick of it. After he's asleep, put the song-book under his pillow. He'll learn to look for it when he's up rather than looking for the wall with his head...
good luck.

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

G.G.

answers from Appleton on

You could request that he get an occupational therapy evaluation. Pediatric occupational therapists assess sensory integration/modulation..they would be able to give you many suggestions of ways to curb these behaviors and give you alternate activities to try with him. In early intervention (birth-3 ages) the evaluation is free..you usually just need a script from your pediatrician. One thing you could maybe try with him when he needs calming is to put a big blanket on the floor, have him lay down on it, and (you need two adults) each of you hold on to an end of the blanket and sing songs while swinging him back and forth. The blanket acts as sort of a cozy cocoon and the swinging is usually super calming. Hope this helps!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hello-
I am a registered nurse and occupational therapist (and mom). You are right to pursue this matter further; it is NOT typical behavior. I would recommend trying to get a referral to be evaluated by a pediatric occupational therapist--they are employed by local school systems as well as private clinics (but this option may be cost-prohibitive unless you can find one that offers sliding scale fees). You could call your local department of Early Childhood and Family Education or go online and see if you can find anything about 'Sensory Integrative Disorders'. The website for the Minnesota O.T. Association is www.motafunctionfirst.org--that would be a good start. They will also post inquiries on their listserv.

Please continue to advocate for your child so that you can receive early intervention. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

My husband rocked back and forth in bed to go to sleep when we first got married.... drove me nuts, but he stopped for the most part now. Both of my boys hit their heads/rock when they are frustrated or tired. They are totally fine when checked out, so I have learned to live with it. My four year old is getting alot better on his own. Hope this helps

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi T., Have you taken your son to a pediatrician or occupational therapist? My friend's son also did this and it was a self stimulating activity that he did to comfort himself. Is there some sensory motor integration difficulties? - (look up SID on the internet). Maybe he needs to be woken up after an appropriate amount of nap time and held, read a story to him or something to change the routine he has fallen into...when he wakes up, he has learned to bang his head. Maybe by changing that routine, you may change that need. Rocking him or getting a small ball that he can bounce on (???) may allow him to get the stimulation his body seems to want. Do seek info, early intervention is a good thing. I wish you success and happiness, K. (a mother of 3 boys)

1 mom found this helpful
Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

We have been dealing with this with my youngest daughter for almost a year now...The ped's were quick to "poopoo" the situation and say that toddlers do weird things when they sleep and she'd grow out of it. This fall when she ended up wearing a bald patch on her head and moving her crib across the room I decided to beg for a referral to a pediatric neurologist who pretty much said the same thing but was able to explain to me why it was ok...pretty much that there is no other reason for it (she does not do much during the day tho). She was diagnosed with a rhythmic sleep disorder which is just left untreated...he assured me that she was not hurting herself, although it is rather scary to watch...she has lessened it somewhat over the winter but if she isn't feeling well or is feeling overwhelmed she will do it more often both awake and during her sleep. I have been looking into working with a OC as well so I would suggest starting there if you think there is more to it that just a sleep disorder. I wish I had more answers for you but I don't, I just wanted to write and say that I am going thru this too and I understand how scary and frustrating it is to not understand what the heck compels your child do do this. If you care to write me back feel free, I may be able to answer at least a couple of questions...for now I would suggest making sure there is a soft padded place for him while he sleeps so he is not banging on the wall, my daughter tends to get up on all fours and smash the top of her head into her pillow so at least she's not putting holes in the wall...yet:)
Good luck
K.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.R.

answers from Rapid City on

My first thought is Autism. Try cutting out the wheat and dairy from his diet (www.talkaboutcuringautism.org). If your doctors haven't found anything, have him tested by a child psychologist for Autism. Sometimes the immunizations cause Autism and it must be diagnosed in order to treat him.

Why is he shut in his room? Maybe his head banging is fear or frustration of being closed in and not being able to get out. Are you able to hear him when he knocks with his hands? At two years old I would even question that he is able to comprehend the action/response of being asked to knock on his door when he wakes up.

If your son is knocking while you are in a session and you cannot hear or attend to him, he may have resorted to head banging because it is something you can hear and respond to.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.S.

answers from Madison on

Hi T.:

I would get a second opinion on this behavior, because while he may not show signs of autism, he might have a sensory integration problem (which can be of diagnosis of its own) which causes the child to do these behaviors called "stims". (PS..if it's any consolation, I rocked my head before bedtime until I was eleven..drove my parents nuts!)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Get him a bed that he can get out of by himself... if you are worried about the height, put it directly on the floor on the box spring instead of on a bed frame. Then encourage him to get up and let himself out when he is done napping or has woken up.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.M.

answers from Eau Claire on

I have a cousin who does the rocking. He's in his thirties and has done it his entire life. If he's sitting on a chair he will sit there are rock, whether it be a rocking chair or not. So this rocking thing may never go away, it just may be a comforting thing for your child to do.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.L.

answers from Lincoln on

Hi T.,

Glad to hear it is not autism. I would recommend some vestibular therapy. You can do this at home by putting him in a swing, winding it up and letting him spin around. Most kids like this and it may help to calm him down.

Regarding the banging on the wall, I would recommend that you purchase a large pad...the kind they put on a gym floor and hooking it to the wall. Place the bed against the pad to protect the wall. You may also get him his own rocking chair to rock himself.

It does sound as if he is trying to calm himself. He will eventually outgrow this, but the pad may save the walls until that time.

Watch the stimuli in his environment. Reduce the amount of TV/videos, lights, sounds and stimulating foods. That may help as well.

L. :)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

E.B.

answers from Duluth on

My son does this as well and so did I until I was about 6. It is his way of comforting himself. If he does not have any other problems it is a perfectly natural happening. The only thing you can do is wait for him to our grow it & to pad the area around his bed so he does not hert himself or the walls.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

A.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I just want to add (to the myriad or responses!) that your pediatrician will not always see what you see. Ours saw nothing in my son, but now he sees an OT for Sensory Integration and will soon be receiving Special Education services at school for Autism. Go with your gut! Mother really does know best.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi T.,
Does your son talk much? You mention "this is how he tells us he is awake" - by rocking and hitting his head.

I don't know a ton about autism, but enough. Rocking, swaying, hitting heads, etc. are signs of autism. It is a calming or coping mechanism. Three is a very wide range of the degrees of autism - I think the upper end is Aspergers. These kids are very smart so don't let his IQ fool you.

I would go back to the doctor with information and be more insistent on getting an answer. You can also contact your school district for an assessment.

Good luck. Finding the answer is sometimes difficult, but moms always seem to "know" when something is not quite right.

K.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

L.G.

answers from Iowa City on

I'm going to go with many here who have said an evaluation by a psychiatrist (preferably an expert in the autism field) would be the way to go. Many kids who are on the spectrum also have sensory issues including my own son. He is 8 and Asperger's, ADD and SID. They go hand in hand in my personal opinion. On the same token it could be some sort of phase your child is going through but it is still a step in the right direction to rule out ASD if you don't think it is that and want to find out the true cause.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

R.N.

answers from St. Cloud on

Hi,
Depending on your child's communication skills, you may want to get him checked with your school district development specialist. Rocking and hitting his head are classic signs of autism.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

M.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would request a early childhood evaluation from your local school. Just to be on the safe side, then you will know of you should be concerned or not.

K.C.

answers from Davenport on

I agree with Tiffany and Linda, ask the pediatrician to test for sensory defensiveness. My nephew did the head banging for years (he was not treated for sensory problems) and was so bad about banging his head that his mom finally bought a thick foam padding and put it on the wall around his bed. The head banging was a way of stimulating his nervous system (he also couldn't stand to wear jeans, prefering dress pants instead). Others have mentioned autism and Sensory defensiveness, along with ADHD is under the autism umbrella of diagnosis.

Sensory problems can be treated by a physical therapist and the younger the kids are when treatment is started, the more successful the treatment is. Both my children and myself have sensory problems, it manifests itself in many different ways and can change as a person ages, which means a person must have a high sense of personal awareness and a broad range of treatment options available. As for me, I've learned to cope (as a child I spun myself in circles all the time, now I get dizzy just turning around too quickly if I don't treat myself...this is one of the ways in which it can change with age). My kids were nearly teenagers before I had even heard of sensory problems and though they (and I) will not ever be 'cured' we do manage to cope just fine with treatments and understanding of each others needs. For us, it's a lifelong thing. My friends daughter was diagnosed early enough (age 5) that she now has a fairly normal sensory system and you'd never know that she ever had the problem as a child. Good luck!

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches