Responsibiliy Chart Question

Updated on June 13, 2011
M.D. asks from San Francisco, CA
7 answers

So i just bought a responsibility chart for my 4 year old. I'm curious if you're "supposed" to give rewards also or are the magnets for ea. chore done enough of a reward? What type of rewards are good? - trips to the park? go out for ice cream? How do you other Mamas use this type of thing?

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K.R.

answers from Spokane on

My kids are just thrilled with the idea of sticking a sticker on the chore chart, they actually start arguing over who gets to do the next chore. No reward other than putting up the sticker/magnet themselves, they really get a sense of internal pride seeing the sticker and knowing they earned it.
My kids are actually "weaned off" the chore chart at this point. My six year old will drag me to his room to show me how clean the floor is, and comes running in the kitchen to help put away dishes, chanting and singing and talking about how if we all work together there's more time to play.

3 moms found this helpful

V.W.

answers from Jacksonville on

I think it depends upon your child. For some kids, getting to move the magnets or stickers (or whatever you are using) is reward enough. For others, they need a bigger "prize". It just depends upon the child.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.K.

answers from Dallas on

We used the magnet chart with our son. We just used the magnets and made a big deal if he got each one for the day. Then at the end of the week, he got a reward for each row that was filled in completely. I gave him money for each row completed, like a quarter or something. He had to put some in his save bank and some in his spending money bank. You could have a really small cup and put a marble in the cup for each row completed and then when he fills the cup, have a special treat like a trip for ice cream or to the park. Whatever you do, make it really simple for you.

2 moms found this helpful
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S.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

We give our 4-year-old one penny for each check he gets (we use a paper sheet rather than a magnet one) and he usually earns about 10-15 cents a day. He then puts the money in a bank (divided into giving, saving, spending) and either gives it at church or other charity, saves for bigger items, or spends it on little things like candy or soda or those little toys you get for a quarter in the vending machine. He likes it and he seems to be learning a little about responsibility with money (and we don't have to work out rewards each time and it's pretty cheap--about $1/week).

2 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Single M&M's for pee, 2 M&M's for pooh, stickers, temp. tattoos, bubbles, bite size rewards if it is candy, maybe fruit roll ups or gummy bears, lots of high 5's for a job well done, can build up to bigger rewards but at 4 years old they don't have the cognitive ability to do this.

With a small child they almost need instant gratification. If they go pee in the potty they need that reward right there, almost in the bathroom...we kept the tin of M&M's on the top shelf. He got one/two immed. depending on what he did.

They don't have the ability to understand "if you do this day after day after day then in a week or w month we'll do such and such or you can have some activity or reward". That comes much later in the process, maybe 10 or 12 years old. Their thought processes are still at a level where they need it right when it happens for them to associate the reward with the action.

1 mom found this helpful
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B.R.

answers from Sacramento on

In my experience, the stickers (in your case magnets) have been reward enough. The key is that they know you are noticing. I never had much success with the purchased charts, but did have great success with ones I made on my computer and laminated so that the child could mark on it with a dry erase marker (supervised quite well by me and the marker put out of reach except when being used, or we'd have had marked up walls!)
If you find that you think you need to give other rewards, I would make it something that is given after a certain time period. Perhaps if the child has done the assigned task correctly every day for a week, take them to a special park to play... or whatever you find is most motivational to the child. I think I would avoid purchased items, unless something like going to have a meal at a place where there is a kiddy play area or something of that kind. This would only work as a reward if you don't often go to such places. The best type of rewards, in my opinion, are something that involves you interacting with your child.

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M.B.

answers from San Francisco on

When my son was very young I added a point value to each chore/responsibility/good behavior. When he earned 20 points he would be able to cash it in and I had a chart of what they were. ie. 20 points -a book of your choice from a book store 30 points- a trip of your choice to a park, movie or playdate, 40 points-a special treat ie. yogurt, dinner etc.

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