Qustion About Son's Treatment at Daycare.

May I ask where you are located? My twins are with a lovely in-home daycare in Lincolnshire. It was hard trusting someone else to raise them but she has worked out wonderfully. I trully felt like the in-home route was best for us. My children get plenty of one on one time and love. This may be the route for you, especially if you are only going two days a week. If I ever felt uncomfortable about something I would speak up and say something. You just have to feel totally comfortable with what you are doing.

My ? is how do you know the one provider is not letting the other provider carry or rock your child to sleep? Also why has he been in 2 different daycares already at 7 months? Maybe the daycare setting might not be what you need for your child at this time. Have you check into a nanny. He would get more one on one attention.
With that being said, if I was uncomfortable I would find somewhere else. Not all providers and children's personalities work together. Plus if you are hearing information from one provider about the other I would not be comfortable with the fact they do not seem to work together well. I am not sure where you are getting your information from.
For peace of mind you need to find something that makes you feel comfortable while you are away from your child.

Absolutely move him.

YOU are in charge of your son's care, and your wishes should be respected by whoever is to provide daycare for your son.

We are one of the few societies in the world that believes in letting kids "cry it out" or to be left to deal with their own issues. This is why we have gangs and kids running around with guns and knives and killing each other.

As early as infancy, children are developing trust and self-esteem and they are very aware of whether or not their needs are being met.

I am appalled that a daycare provider would refuse to soothe a crying baby, and prevent the other woman from doing so. Every child has needs, and some days those needs require more effort, and whoever watches your son should be tending to him every day.

I hope you find a better caretaker for him.

Trust your instincts there is a reason you have them!! It probably isn't really bad but something is not right and its triggering you. If you aren't comfortable then your sanity, your work, and your children will suffer. Switching environments stinks but you have to do what is best for the entire family and sometimes that takes several places!

Good Luck!!

Your own peace of mind depends on you feeling good about where your son is while you're away from him. It sounds to me like you worry, so you should definitely move him. Believe me - you'll sleep better at night and work better during the day if you are confident that his physical AND emotional needs are being met in a way that's consistent with your values.

I am assuming that you talking about a daycare center...have you ever looked into home daycare? In home daycare your child would recieve much more one on one attention. Home daycare is much more relaxed and comfortable and there are less children and normally there is only one person so you wouldn't run into this situation again. If you are uncomfortable at all I do think you should consider switching again.
Look at lakecountyhomedaycare.com and see if there is someone in your area or look for similiar sites if you are in a different county.

Good Luck!

Yikes. Sounds like you are really struggling with everything right now. Take a deep breath. Given that you have a lot going on right now with adjusting to being a new Mommie and a husband who seems to want your attention and probably lack of sleep added to the pressures of work, I am guessing that you are super-sensitive to everything right now. Is there a way that you could talk to another Mom at the daycare to see if she is having the same problem(s)?

Another Mom suggested talking to the nice daycare lady to see if she could help. Having been in a similiar situation to you, when my son was an infant, I can tell you that I felt this way too and boy, did I come out with guns blazing. Unfortunately, as a result, I lost a lot of relationships because of my approach. So, I would urge caution in your words and try to "sanity check" with someone you trust.

I also know about Mommie's instinct and sometimes you just got to do what you gotta do. We changed daycares for my son three times before finding the right one. They aren't all perfect but you need to feel good so you can concentrate on work. At the end of the day, we found a daycare where I knew my son was being well taken care of and that he was having fun at. For us, the Kindercare on Quentin/ Algonquin worked best.

Hope this helps. Deep breath, my friend. In a couple of months, things will all get better.

N.

If it were my child, I'd start researching alternatives.

I'm not saying you haven't done this in the past, but please go visit lots and lots of places. Drop in unexpectedly and ask to visit, so you can see how things 'really are' not just the 'bells and whistles' tour they give everyone. Talk to all the staff members, even ones in older kids' rooms because one day your kid will be there. Don't feel badly lingering there just to watch and see what's going on - a good daycare center won't mind one bit whereas a bad daycare center will try to either usher you out the door, not understand why you are observing what's going on, or try to control every aspect of your visit. It's your child and your money - they will be working for YOU, so you set the tone. Ask them what their philosophy is regarding sleeping, eating, crying, playing, etc. You should be able to get a feel for the place right away. I went to a center that had a sparkling reputation and is considered to be an 'elite' place. 5 minutes into the visit I wanted to leave - it felt so cold, institutional, and robotic. I wondered if any of them ever grew attached or had an affinity for their students or if they were just concerned with marching them through their paces and keeping the kids on their strict, inflexible schedule. Like other posters have said, go with your gut instinct. If it feels bad to you, you'll never feel comfortable leaving your son there.

That being said, my son is in daycare and I feel like we have hit the jackpot with our decision. We absolutely love his lead teacher, the staff (the older kids' rooms know me and my son already and say hi!), and pretty much everything about the place. I will admit, at first I had the whole "I'm his mother, I know best, and no one can do the job better than me" mentality. When I finally came to my senses and realized that the people who work most closely with my son have been working with infants for at least 7 years (in other words, they've worked with dozens of babies and have seen it all), I developed a wonderful partnership with these women who have essentially served as mentors for me in helping my child grow and develop.

Yes, it is more than enough reason. I am a home daycare provider and a mommy of a 3 year old boy and a 4 month old girl. I would not want my child to go through not feeling secure at this age when they need that stability most. Also, I can't imagine being in this field and being so cold. When you do look elsewhere ask for references from other parents, with children in current care and children in past care to give you a better picture.
Good Luck.

Maybe you could talk to the nice woman and tell her how you are feeling in regards to the mean woman. Maybe the nice one will try and limit the time the mean lady spends around your son.....??

Hi there. I run a daycare myself and I believe that yes it is reason to be concerned. Every child has their so called bad days and should definitely get the extra love and attention. I would not say it is reason to move him yet. I would recommend talking to the women who is there full time and make her aware of your concerns. If after that you see no change then I would conceder moving him. One way to judge how your son is doing while you are not there is what his mood is like when you return. Is he happy when the other women is there? Does he have a different disposition when the part time girl is there? Do you find him to be more "clingy" when you pick him up? Your son can give you more info then a lot of people think. I hope that helps a bit.

Trust your instincts, plain and simple.
I'm sitting here scratching my head wondering why on earth the 40% woman is even in daycare. Cold and refusing to sooth a tiny little baby just don't sound like characteristics I would look for in a daycare worker.

Yes.

Basic needs go beyond changing, feeding, and safety. He needs emotional stability, nurturing, and physical and verbal praise. As he gets older he will start to display typical baby/toddler behavior and do you think the %40 of the time woman can handle this in the matter that you find nurturing and appropriate? I would also be concerned that since she seems to have a strong personality that if she did something wrong or inappropriate would the other woman fire her? Does the other woman provide he feedback on her skills as a caregiver? If something happened would the nicer woman even tell you or be afraid of how the not nice woman would react? I know it stinks to look again but you should have no doubts in your mind about where your child spends the majority of his time. Also if you do choose to leave give the nice woman that feedback about the other lady. She may be willing to make a change...good luck!!!

If you feel something isn't right it isn't. Have you considered getting a sitter to come to your home or not working right now ?