Questions Instead of Statements

I think this is very normal. I believe she is looking to see if she is right. Intead of saying yes or ignoring, open it to a discussion and ask her what she thinks. Does she think it's black? When she answers yes tell her she is right and a very smart girl. This should get her thinking about what she is asking. She sounds like a very smart little girl.

It is NORMAL cognitive development and per her age.
NORMAL.
Both my kids did and do that too.
Its good.
It means they are developing normally.

My son was doing that at that age, and then he would also say constantly "How Come?" or "Why?" or "How?"
But as a result, my son at now 4 years old, knows why it rains, how rain is formed, how buildings are built, etc. Because we research it and 'explain' it to him. He finds it fascinating.

It is a good time, to teach them about things... and about problem solving.

Its a phase. Yes.

all the best,
Susan

When my son asks a question that he knows the answer to (he is 2.5), I ask him what he thinks. There is a scarecrow at daycare and for 3 days whenever we passed it, he would say, what's that? On the third day, I said, do you remember what I said it was? And then he repeated it like a statement. When we stop at a light, he will ask why we are stopping, I will ask him what he thinks. He will say the light is red. He may still ask the question again, but I throw it back to him.

I think that this is either a phase or a way to engage in a conversation. Maybe it is just reassurance.

Not all kids do this, because it's 99% of the time it's a reaction / learned behavior. Some kids do it because they react in a certain way (see #4) while others react in different ways.

As adults we are *constantly* asking kids questions we know the answers to. Kids respond to that in one or more of a variety of ways:

1 - Answering, for a variety of reasons

2 - Coming to the conclusion that most adults are pretty stupid

3 - Coming to the conclusion that some adults think they, the child, are stupid

4 - Coming to the conclusion that one is SUPPOSED to ask questions they already know the answer to as part of daily life

5 - Coming to the conclusion that the "right" answer to a static question might change over time. "Are you hungry?" has different answers, so perhaps static questions like "colors" have different answers. So they're checking something they THINK they have the answer correct, because maybe red is only red on tuesdays, and it changes on wednesdays. Or in the morning, or when it's raining. It's a valid response. Word TENSES change based on time (and in some languages based on what sex the speaker is or object is (la, le in French is a good example... for sex of the speaker, Latin is a prime example of all of the above), or the listener. Meanwhile; Du versus Sie in German is a good example.

The one I find *hilarious* is number 3. Because it results in one of a few things: the "look" (what is WRONG with you? I've know what color a firetruck is for YEARS), OR a wrong answer. Really? You're REALLY going to ask me that? Okay, fine. Blue.

The 1% of the time it is NOT a learned behavior is when the child is seeking depth. For example there are about 50 shades of blue. Turquoise is always blue, as is "sky blue", but blue is not always turquoise. Also a color can change versus the light. A black dog may show a lot of red in the sunshine OR a lot of white. Is it still considered black?

((Yes, my percentages are made up. As far as I know there have been no studies done on this... the percentages are based off of my observation only.))

Another HILARIOUS thing to "do" with kids when they little (3-5 is primetime) is to ask them something REALLY obvious in a clueless tone of voice. Because they freeze. Deer in headlights freeze. This is why teachers are trained to use the phrase "Tell me about ____obvious thing_____".

ex) A good friend of mine was babysitting. She went upstairs after locking up after the parents and found the 5 year old shaving the dog. She WAS a teacher, but the words slipped out anyway;

"What are you DOING???"

The little girl, as expected, froze and just stared at her.

"I don't know."

My friend's brain kicked into gear and she knelt down and asked:

"Honey, why are you shaving the dog?"

The girl relaxed and looked at my friend and answered:

"Doggie has chemo."

Kids FREAK out when they actually believe for a moment that an adult has no idea what they are doing. The little girl had THOUGHT she was shaving the dog. It was really obvious to her that she was shaving the dog. When her babysitter saw her, though, she had no idea what she was doing. So maybe she WASN'T shaving the dog. So they *usually* answer "I don't know." because at that moment, they really DON'T. They had thought they knew what they were doing, but apparently they were wrong, so what on earth WERE they doing???

So it's an early childhood development trick to *never* ask a child *what* they are doing. Why is fine, tell me about it is fine, but "what" creates panic for a certain age group. It doesn't last for too long... but it's across the board and all cultures that this q has been posed by anthropologists and psychologists. But the child has to actually believe the adult doesn't know. They usually confuse "shock" with not knowing. Look at a toddlers face when they learn something new, and you'll see why. Their expression looks shocked until they absorb the answer. And even as adults we parallel our own facial expressions and others as meaning the same things. It's why we "believe" good actors, but bad actors are almost painful to watch.

you should answer her, she is still feeling out language. yes, the dog is black, yes, there is water in your cup, yes, your shirt is green. You may add to those responses as well by saying "yes, your shirt is green, mommies shirt is blue. yes, there is water in your cup, mommies cup has milk in it. She will learn to make statements if you continue to show her how to and not tell her how to.

My daughter did the same thing at that age...
"Mommy, what are you doing?"
"Driving"
"Why are you driving?"
"To go to the store."
"Why are we going to the store?"

OR

"Mommy, what color is that car?"
"Blue."
"Why is it blue?"

I figured that it was her way of wanting a conversation. I knew that she knew what I was doing or what color the car was. I too got very frustrated. Then I started going with the conversation and would reask the question to her...

"Mommy, what are you doing?"
"I don't know. What am I doing?"
"Driving."

"Mommy, what color is that car?"
I don't know. What color is it?"
"Blue."

Start asking your daughter the same question she just asked you. She only wants to talk with you and doesn't know how yet.
"Do I have water in my cup?"
"I don't know. Do you have water in your cup?"

"Is the cat meowing?"
"Do you think the cat's meowing?"

You could continue the conversation with talking about what else could go in a cup or why's the cat meowing.

Good luck!

My DS did this a lot! To me, I thought he would ask those questions to get confirmation or verification so it didn't annoy me. I would just think how smart he is =-)

Anyway, I would just pose the question back to him
"Is my shirt green?"
"I think so. What color do you think your shirt is?"

He outgrew that phase as I'm sure your 3 y/o will to.

By the way I love how vocal your daughter is! I know that's not what you want to hear but I know some Moms that are worried that their child isn't speaking enough at age 3/4 and are considering speech therapy. That your daughter has the ability to ask so many questions at age 3 is amazing to me!

My daughter is almost 8 and still asks questions to things she clearly knows the answer's too mainly to "confirm" through me she's correct because she isn't cofident. i like grandma tm's advice..

what i do with my daughter is "you tell me....IS the dog black?"

it's perfectly normal, she feeling out the language, and not yet real confident. just keep reasuring her she's correct.

Encourage her questions... even if she already knows the answer. That "is the dog black" question usually is b/c she is working something out in her head and needs reassurance, like "why is the dog black but the cat isn't? though she may not know how to express that part yet, but those wheels are turning.

Children who ask lots of questions typically have very high intelligence.

If she asks a question, she knows for example, "Are we eating soup?", engage her, and make her think about it. I would say, "Yes we are eating soup, do you know what it is in it? Carrots, peas, potatoes, pasta. Did you know that some of those grow out of the ground?? Can you guess which ones?"
What we do when our kids start to get repetitive, is encourage the questions, but remind them to say it one time. Other wise they sound like a broken record!

Perfectly normal. She is just verifying to herself that she is correct and looking for your assurance. My nearly 3 year old is doing the same thing. It can get annoying, but I do not ignore her. I just say "Yes, the dog is black, but what color is the cat?", "Yes, your shirt is green, but what color are your shoes?" It will pass. My daughter asks every morning since school started "Is Vadin and Vance at School?" "Is Daddy at work?" "Where is Papa?" "Where is Grandma?" I always answer. My boys both went through the same stage. Just wait till she is asking questions you can't answer! Such as "Why did they paint that house blue?" "Why didn't they paint it green?" "I like green, they should have painted the house green?" "Why would they want a blue house? I don't like blue!" She will be doing that in a few years. Now you have something more annoying to look forward too. It is part of growing up.

I think you're handling it well. That's what I would do. I'd answer some and ignore some. I have 5 kids and a couple of mine went through a phase where they asked questions they knew the answer to or asked unanswerable questions constantly. Sometimes, when it got to be a "game" of 20 questions, I'd answer a few and then send them to play. =) Don't be impatient with her but you can answer a few or confirm them, then send her to play or do something else... or just ignore her. She might just be talking to hear herself speak this wonderful new language. =) Good luck!!!

Just ask her "what color do you think the dog is?" and if she says "I think the dog is purple", then you say, "no, he's black". If she says "he's black" say, "yes, he is". Once you start turning it around on her she may get "tired" of answering her own questions! Otherwise, I'm sure she will grow out of it. good luck!

totally normal. My son is now three and doesn't do this anymore, but oh my, He would ask the same question over and over to stuff he knew the answer to. I was going insane. I finally figured out if I ask him the same question back he would answer the question and it would end. Thank goodness it came to an end. ;) I also had to remind him that he didn't need to repeat the same question. It will end soon. Also, just say, I am only going to answer that question once, so you need to listen to the answer. I would also sometimes repeat the question back and that worked too. good luck.

My three year old does the same thing! In fact, when I ask him a question he just poses it back to me and gets upset if I don't know the answer (like what did you eat for lunch at school?). I hate to admit how frustrating I find it, because I do adore him, but he does it ALL DAY LONG! He also loves to ask about people's motivations--why does that farmer like to drive green tractors?--why is that guy wearing gloves--why is he hungry--these aren't even the best examples, I could go on, and on, and on...

I agree that you should open the question up to show her how much she knows. I had to laugh at this though because my youngest was one who always ended everything he said with "huh?" or with his dad he would say "huh dad?" like "I found a worm, huh dad?" Drove my husband crazy at the time but now we laugh about it when we remember how he did that.

This is a phase and should quit within a year or so and is perfectly normal. I believe this is just reaffirmment of what they know and yes it will drive you crazy until it stops. Take a deep breathe and continue doing what you are doing and it isn't mean not to answer every question that she has. I used to ignore the question and engage in conversation about something else totally and redirect their thoughts. Good Luck!!!! Someday you will wish they would ask questions again instead of them thinking they know everything! Smile...

My 3 year old does this all the time. I usually don't answer questions that I'm very sure he already knows the answer to. Instead I turn it around and say "Hmm...do you have water in your cup? What do you think?" He'll usually answer his own question. If he continues to do it I tell him "You already know the answer to that question. You don't need Mommy to answer it." Next I try distraction. One of those usually works. I don't know why he does this, but, like you, I expect he'll grow out of it soon. I wouldn't have any problem with saying "Mommy isn't going to answer questions that you already know the answer to."

Good luck!
J.

It will totally end. And, on a related note, my son (2.5) said "I have to ask you a question." I said, "okay." He said something along the lines of, "the sun is shining." I said, "Honey, that's not a question." He said, "it's an answer then." I realized that's really how they see conversation at this age - just questions and answers. Back to back statements for some reason just doesn't compute.

But yes, it can get extremely annoying. I found that answering in silly ways made the questioning abate a little. Good luck.

Yes, it will end. It's cute, though sometimes annoying. Indulge her and answer the questions. It's harmless. How hard are a few words? Yes, you're eating soup. Yes, this is your shark. It saves you from actually having to come up with meaningful conversation with a three year old.

Oh, and, I just thought of what I would probably do with a child like that. I'd give them a silly answer. No, you're eating spaghetti. No, that's Santa Claus's shark.

My 5 year old still does it... so does his 3 year old brother....

My route answer to questions that they know the answer to is (nicely) "What do you think?". (or What color do you think it is?, etc.) They usually answer it and move on. Sometimes I use this answer to get them to think about something new as well, before I answer the question for them.

J.

Mine does that too:) I think they do it to reaffirm things they know -- it gives them comfort to go over things. Less fun for mommies:) I agree with opening up the question (hmmm, what color is your shirt?), or just saying yes, you're right. I wouldn't ignore too much, but I also get that kids that age sometimes just ask questions to get your attention -- so follow your gut, I guess:)