Question About 2Nd, 3Rd, 4Th... Labors and TMI

Updated on January 22, 2012
S.F. asks from Ogdensburg, NY
14 answers

So I am due with my second baby (another girl) in 4 weeks and I have been wondering about this for a while now but feel a bit uncomfortable about talking to my OB just because its not like anything can be done about it anyway. When I had my daughter 2 years ago I tore some and had to get 7 stitches - OUCH but I survived and all healed over time. I am wondering if now because I have scar tissue down there from last time if I am more likely to tear again and possibly worse or if it will help because now things have been stretched, for lack of a better word =)
Like I said I know not much can be done about it but I am curious as to what to expect
Thanks in advance

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So What Happened?

If anyone has seen the movie, Baby Mama this will be funny - you think I should ask my OB about spraying PAM down there? LOL

Featured Answers

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

With my first I didn't tear but was cut. 2,3, and 4, I neither tore or was cut and they were all around the same size.

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E.A.

answers from Erie on

The Bad News: You tore because your OB should have been massaging your perineum. But, you can do this yourself or have your husband do it when labor starts. This prevents tearing in most cases, so yes, something can be done about it. Actually, you can start now, use any oil and massage and stretch the perineum for a few minutes every day.

The Good News: You TORE, you weren't cut. Tearing causes less scar tissue and damage in general since the cells tend to tear along their walls and heal with less trauma.

I had four babies 7 1/2lbs to 9lbs2oz, only got an episiotomy with the first one b/c my doc didn't know what she was doing. Had midwives after that and never tore.

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H.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

My first i had an epesiotomy...my second had shoulder dystocia and well I spent hours afterwards getting stitched up and put back together, my third I had a midwife and she did some pretty amazing things down there and I did not even have a single tear. No recovery needed it was awesome. You can really never know till you get there.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

With my first (and only), there was no tearing or cutting because my midwife massaged my peritoneum for most of time I was pushing (over three hours). I doubt an OB would do this, but a midwife or doula will.

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E.S.

answers from Dayton on

Better to tear than be cut.
I was cut w/ my first and tore w/ my 2nd despite the fact my midwife was massaging like crazy.
I was in a bad position to give birth and pushing like crazy. Maybe if I had slowed down I wouldn't have torn.
Sigh.
Hoping the 3rd time is the charm.
GL! and absolutely get some olive oil and start stretching things out now.
I did the 2nd time around but I guess not often enough.
It kinda hurts. : /
Or maybe that was just the 9 months of yeast problems my DS brought me.
The things we mamas go through for our children! ;)

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K.E.

answers from Jacksonville on

I tore with my first pretty bad. The OB told me to stop pushing so he could cut, but it was so beyond my control that she just came out. I only pushed 3 times. I don't think anyone was thinking she'd be out within an hour of our arrival at the hospital! :)

With my second, I tore again, but small tears that healed rather quickly. I was at the hospital longer this time because I didn't wait as long to go since this time the hospital was an hour away. :) He was born within 4 hours of being at the hospital and I pushed about 7 times with him. I pushed with the nurse for about 5 of the pushes and the OB pretty much just walked in to catch him!

I also felt more like myself quicker this time around than I did the first time. I wasn't as sore for as long and I didn't bleed as much either. BUT my periods since his birth (almost 5 mos ago) have been much different than before. Crazy how the body works. :)

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

I tore badly all three times. Hope it goes better for you!

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M.M.

answers from Lake Charles on

You joke about PAM but they broke out the Olive Oil with me :) my mom was like UMM.... is that olive oil?!?! I tore pretty bad with #1, stitches and then healed back just the way I was so I was expecting to tear with #2 but I was seriously back to feeling normal after like 4 days! It was nuts. My labor went SO fast too so idk how or what they did with the olive oil (I'm guessing they put it on and just helped me stretch while I was having him?) I seriously pushed 2 times (between contractions at that) and my little man was here.. ask about perennial massage.. thats an easy way to ask "is my business gonna tear?"

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P.K.

answers from New York on

You are not more likely to tear. I had two with stiches and two without. It
went 1/stitches, 1/none, 1/stitches, 1/none. So basically it is a crapshoot.

Updated

You are not more likely to tear. I had two with stiches and two without. It
went 1/stitches, 1/none, 1/stitches, 1/none. So basically it is a crapshoot.

1 mom found this helpful

C.M.

answers from Washington DC on

with my first I had an episotomy (sp?) and I still tore a little after. I can't remember how many stitches I had but I did have some. With my 2nd, no episotomy, but I did just slightly tear a little bit. I think I had 2 or 3 stitches. Recovery 2nd time around was much easier for me. You should ask your ob anyway. It's a good question to ask and I'm sure she gets it all the time. I've heard that using olive oil and massaging the area can help. I never tried it but I've heard it can help.

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

With my first I had a level 4 episiotomy (basically front to back). With the second I did not tear or need to be cut at all. So there is hope, but I would certainly just ask your doctor what to expect.

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D.

answers from Houston on

I had the same worry. I really wanted to avoid tearing so my midwife helped with warm compresses, olive oil and had me push in a side lying position. My son was born very quickly but I didn't tear at all and he was a bigger baby. I encourage you to bring this up with your ob as there are things that can be done. Best wishes.

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A.B.

answers from Louisville on

I tore badly and needed plenty of stitches with my first. He was the only one I tore badly with. I don't think I even had to have stitches with the others. All of my children were pretty small, though, which probably had a lot to do with it.

If you really are concerned, though, don't hesitate to ask the OB. It's not a silly question, and he/she may be able to give you information that would make you less nervous about what to expect in terms of tearing. Best of luck with the second delivery!

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Tearing vs Oil?

Oil!!!!

DO talk with your OB about this. Practices that use oil and peritoneum massage (and don't do epi's) tend to have tearing cases in the single digits percent wise. It's flat out what's *taught* in school these days (avoid episiotomies, and using oil and massage), because it's so durn effective. Meanwhile episiotomies are being shown to increase the risk of severe tearing, rather than to lower it.

Obviously, not PAM.

I wouldn't personally go with a doctor who was NOT willing to use oil and massage. It would be on my short list of dealbreaker interview questions! I like my vajayjay how it is!

((While some of it IS pure luck, it's not 100%, I also had a huge headed 10lb baby and two hands in me at one point. Oil and massage and not even an abrasion, much less tearing.))

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