Problem with Sister

My only advice is to try again... and make it CLEAR you are not amused by her "joking" about you and your family. Explain to her that you are at the end of your rope with her comments and have literally had to seek the advice of strangers because you are so frustrated. Offer her whatever ultimatum you are willing to follow through with. If you tell her it is so serious that you are willing to cut her out of your life then be prepared to follow through, no matter how painful the thought. If you tell her that you will have to seriously cut back on the amount of time you spend with her because of your pain, then be willing to cut back if she continues. I think that those who continue to invite people to walk all over them, generally get what they invite. Evil requires the sanction of the victim. Put a stop to her "joking" ways however you must, or in the end you and your family will be the ones to suffer. It certainly doesn't seem she is suffering much. Harsh, I know, but this has been a reality in my life with family. Good luck and best wishes.

I agree with Brittany's response. Your sister may be acting like this out of jealousy. Some people do mean things when they are jealous.

I agree with the opinions that you need to really, really confront your sister about this. What I mean by that is it sounds like you have tried to confront her nicely and that has not work so STOP being so NICE about it and tell her to quit calling your kids names...you do not want your kids to think that calling names is okay...it is none of her business whether your husband works or stays home with the kids (I personally think that it is pretty cool that he stays home with the kids), your parenting skills and lifestyle are your business and not hers. You need to let her know in very plain terms that the things she is saying to you and especially your children are very offensive and need to stop.

Tell her you love her. I understand that you do not want to stop talking to her but from your description of the situation it sounds like a very caustic situation.

Remind your sister of what we all grew up hearing...if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all.

Good luck
M. N.

Honestly, you have to tell her that her comments come across as very rude, whether she means them in that way or not (giving her the benefit of the doubt)....then add the important part--that you don't want your kids growing up in an environment thinking that behavior is acceptable. And that's really it--our kids are sponges and will take it all in. It's no surprise that very often, the "mouthy" kids are the ones whose parents are the same way. Bottom line, she needs to cut itout for the sake of your kids, if she can't stop it for the simple reason that she should care about your feelings.
And stick to your guns---don't spend time with her ntil it changes.

I understand that you love your sister, but there are some people that you must love from a distance. If you have explained to her how you feel, and the "jokes" continue, you must distance yourself, and your family from her unless she can honor your wishes. If she really loves you, she will stop. If not, your are better off. How you and your husband manage your family is your own business. If she came to you in a loving way and expressed her opinion, that would be fine, but it is up to you to make your own decisions. Since you are a Christian, I would suggest praying for her.

You're getting some good advice, I would confront her in a firm way so she knows you mean business. She will probably get hurt, but OH WELL, its not like you haven't been patient thuse far. (and don't let her throw the Christian thing in your face--Christians can confront too). She's obviously insecure and jealous and has to deflect onto others. I'd let her know that you just won't spend as much time with her--its not fair to your family either to listen to that stuff.
Often, I have to ask for God's perspective on these situations--I know someone just like your sister, and they are not the easiest people to love.
V., Mother of a pistol of a 2 year old

You pray. Tell God exactly what you are telling us, and why it bothers you, and ask him for the wisdom and the right words at the right time to talk to your sister in love. As the Holy spirit to guide your toungh and thoughts that you might rebuke her in love or give you spiritual eyes to see the situation from her perspective and to understand why she chooses to take that approach towards you and your family. It alway helps me. some times the answer is instant some times it not.
M.

I think you owe it to yourself and your kids to put your foot down and tell her that if she can't be respectful then you'll have to stop spending time with her.

You cannot change another person. You can only change how you react to them. It's unfortunate that your sister is so unkind, but maybe you need to look at it from the point of view that she may be making these comments out of her own insecurity. She may be pointing out what is wrong with others to deflect what she sees as imperfections in herself or her own family. I would let her know that her behavior is unacceptable and you won't tolerate it anymore. Tell her if she persists in saying mean and critical things about you and your family you will have to stop spending time with her. I would follow through with this if she doesn't stop. It may be the attention getter she needs to see that her behavior isn't going to be tolerated any longer. If there is no consequence to treating you and your family this way; why would she stop?