Preschool or No Preschool?

Updated on February 20, 2009
L.H. asks from Long Beach, CA
9 answers

So the paperwork I requested just arrived for pre-school in September. My daugter is already potty-trained and will be 3 at the end of July. She talks about going to school with her lunch and backpack but I am not sure if I am ready for her to go!

My mom says there wasn't a single day that I didn't hate going to pre-school... I imagine I liked it once I started playing and I know my daughter isn't me but I just wonder, should I wait one more year? She has YEARS of school ahead of her!

When did your kids go to pre-school? What are your thoughts? Any regrets?

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K.T.

answers from Los Angeles on

ALL research shows that kids who attend preschool have better academic success!! There is no question about this!!

I am a speech language pathologist and work with kids. I can tell right away when kids haven't attended preschool. They usually don't have the same skills, such as social, emotional, language, etc.

My 2 girls have been in preschool since age 2. THEY LOVE, LOVE, LOVE school. They complain on the weekends when they can't go. They talk about their friends and teachers and all the new stuff they learned.

Give it a try, even if it's only part time!!

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J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I think so much just depends on your child and your situation. My son started preschool at only 2 1/2. I didn't plan or intend for him to start so young, but he was having problems and his pediatrician suggested trying school. It was wonderful for him and he loved it. Right away, we saw changes in his home behavior and his happiness. My younger children (twins) are now 2 1/2. I planned to wait until 3, but 1 really may need something earlier. The other is probably one of those kids who could wait until kindergarten. He learns a lot from me at home and is naturally social. My other 2 need the social skills with other children that they learn in preschool and they aren't responsive to learning things like colors, letters, numbers, etc... from me or their father. However, they learn it well in school. It just seems to depend on the particular child. If your daughter wants to try, there is probably little harm in letting her. If it doesn't work out for either of you, remove her from the school and try again next year.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Hi L H, Pres-school is not mandatory, either is kendergarden, but if your daughter wants to go let I would let her go, I did the Parent Child participation with my first born, I think they are called mommy and me classes now, he staerted at 3, of course I was there, my we lived in Japan when my second and third child was old enough for preschool, my second child didn't want to go, but my daughter wanted to, she was 3 when she started it was on base and it was only 2 days a week 4 hours each day, and she loved it, no regrets, well maybe one, and that would be not sending my second child to preschool. J. L.

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

My daughter started a few months shy of turning 4. My son started shortly after turning 3. Every child is different. In my son's case, when he was around 2.5 I told the school if they got an opening he was ready. They normally wait till they are 3 but he was very ready! He didn't end up starting until the summer session when he was about 3 years old and a few months. Both of them took to preschool very differently. My daughter although older, cried when I left. My son hardly looked up to say goodbye! This past week however he hasn't wanted to go, kids do this so be prepared.

To send her or not is really up to you, like I said, all kids are different. You are right, she has years of school ahead of her, but if you have a great preschool, it's a place for her to socialize with peers her age, play play play, learn many things like; waiting your turn, caring for a friend who just got hurt, doing activities that you may have never thought of to do at home, manners, hygeine, etc.. things that can be taught at home of course but it's just different when Mom/Dad aren't around. Sometimes I go to my son's school and just watch him w/out him knowing. I'm constantly amazed at what I see. I also volunteer at the school a fair amount, know all of the teachers very well and just overall, feel very comfortable with my kids in their care - that helps. The only regret I had was with my daughter, I only sent her two days a week so I think that is part of the reason why it was hard for her, she just wasn't there enough. I started my son out at 3 days a week and I think that is just perfect. For him of course, I miss him terribly, but while the kids are gone, I do all the cleaning/shopping/cooking so that when they are home, I'm not running around, I can just be with them. Sorry, I got a bit long winded here...

Best wishes whatever you decide,
M.

1 mom found this helpful
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K.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Our daughter has been in preschool since she was 2. Granted, our choice was limited because we both need to work, we could not be happier. My daughter loves her friends there and talks about them constantly. She clearly loves all the teachers in the school (only 5+owner) because she talks about what she does with each one and is happy to see them. On occasion she has tears in the morning, but clearly, she adjusts quickly once my husband leaves her.

Both of us notice different things that she learns on a daily and weekly basis. The vocabulary she picks up, the spanish that is taught, and the social skills. She is also far more independent than my niece, who has an in-home daycare provider.

Of course, it is your choice, but I certainly cherish our time more in the evenings as a family.

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D.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

My son in now 30 months old, (3 in July) and has been going two days a week to a preschool program since mid-January, and he loves it. I have no regrets at all!

He was spending so much time with his Dad during visitation in the mornings and my Mom in the afternoon that I figured he was fine with situation. But, I started noticing that it was taking me longer and longer to break away from kids at story time, playdates or music class. So, in November of last year I started looking at schools and finally found one my son loved.

With part-time, it's more about socialization and getting used to the idea of school and being around their peers. Once he's 3 years old, we'll follow the advice of his teacher's and see if he can handle more time there at the school, but I think the key is to not rush it. If she's ready try a couple of days for a few hours and see how she adjusts...if she doesn't you can always try again later.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

My daughter started when she was 3 and about to turn 4 years old.
She LOVED it. She even would tell us she wanted to go to school. She was ready. She NEEDED it, and was ready to learn new things... and be with other children. She really really liked it. And her teachers and the school was great... so she had a tremendous experience there. She still will talk about it to this day, and say how Preschool was so great and how lucky she was.

Talk with your girl about it. It IS really beneficial. Though some kids may be apprehensive. The difference is in the Teachers and the school, and how they approach children.

If you are apprehensive... keep that to yourself. You don't want your daughter to "feel" nervous about it. Let her have her good feelings about it. She seems eager to go... so that is good. Nurture that in her. Or she will think something is "wrong" with going to school because she hears/sees you talk about it negatively.

She can go part-time. That is how we started my daughter. Then at a certain point, she told us she wants to go everyday. So we did. And it also worked out because by then, I had a 2nd child!

If anything, just try it. Give her time to adjust. See how she enjoys it. If she REALLY hates it, then you can stop.
No biggie.

All the best,
Susan

1 mom found this helpful
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H.A.

answers from San Diego on

I was never ready for my DC to go to pre-school either, so they didn't/haven't. My DS started kindergarten last fall and was just fine. My DD is now enjoying some 1-on-1 time with mommy (interrupted by baby #3). I have always supplemented their days with outings and 'field trips' and long for the unstructured days of last year. We used our time to visit family and fun places during the week and off season. When DS entered kindergarten, he was fully prepared (ABC's, beginning reader, seat work, etc.). If your DD wants to go, why not a couple 1/2 days a week? Just enough for her to stay excited about and give you a couple mornings free?

1 mom found this helpful
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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

If mom is having trouble with it and she wants to go, then why not part time. Really it is all about the child, but I know it is so tough for us to let go. My daughter started preschool at about 19 months and she is now almost 3.5 YO. It is just a part of life for her and she loves to go visit with her friends and make art projects. As well, she often talks about her teachers when she is at home. I think there are a lot of good influences for her there.

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