Potty Training STRESS - Cincinnati,OH

Updated on August 01, 2013
D.E. asks from Tampa, FL
9 answers

My 3rd boy is going to be three in about 6 weeks. And has absolutely ZERO interest w/ potty training. I have not pushed the issue, but I have been picking days where I have him sit on the potty chair frequently and encourage him to try. He'll sit on it, but has yet to pee or poop one time. He'll get up and walk away and go pee on the floor if I don't get a diaper on him immediately.

He tells us when he's peeing or pooping in his diaper. He'll ask for the potty sometimes then when I go to put him on it he'll say NO! And run off. I know not to force the issue, but does anyone have any tips on ways to encourage him? My oldest was potty trained %100 by now, my middle was a miracle and was trained at 2 and a half! I had a strong feeling he wouldn't be potty trained by pre-school time so I didn't sigh him up as all preschool programs near us require they are trained.

Any tips????

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answers from Washington DC on

Why not take a weekend, stay at home, and just do it? Explain to him ahead of time what the plan in, and tell him what you expect from him. Get a reward system that works for you and him (candy, stickers, toys, whatever) and use it - I suggest this be something he can earn and lose. So if you do the candy route, make him earn 2 before he can eat them...something like that.

He can also sense the stress it is causing you...I hope you find something that works for you guys, but I would just set aside a few days and get it done..

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answers from Dallas on

I just finished training my 3rd son. My first two trained at 3 and my 3rd son trained at 28 months. It drives me nuts when people say he's not ready. It sounds like he is very aware of his body and what's going on with regards to the potty. Do people wait until kids are READY to learn to take baths, brush teeth, put their toys away? That's what training is. It can be a very positive experience if you make it one. I will tell you, I used Lora Jensen's 3 day potty training method and it TOTALLY worked for all three of my boys. If you want to private message me I can tell you more about it. No, I don't sell it or work for them or anything but I just know what worked for us. It literally pee-trains them in about a day and a half but the poop takes a little longer. It took a few weeks for my first, one week with my second and about one week with my third. It's three days of hard work for you but it's so worth it when you're not struggling with potty issues for months. I sure wish you the best and I hope you find some good answers you can implement.

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answers from Boston on

Kids are different. Three is young for a lot of kids. He's not ready. You say you aren't pushing the issue, but your title puts "stress" in all caps. A lot of kids want the diaper for peeing and pooping. They feel secure, they can't "perform" on the potty, whatever. He's probably doing other things way ahead of the average, and on this he's just average or slower than average. You cannot force him, you can only let go. It will happen in time. Choose your battles - this is not one you can win!

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answers from Miami on

The best tip I can give you is that he's a boy and boys sometimes take longer than girls to train. You can't compare him to his siblings. He's not ready. Wait a few months and try again. Don't use pullups when you start. Give him M&M's as incentives. 5 for peeing and 10 for pooping. Make sure that there is NO candy in the house for several months before doing this so that he'll REALLY want those M&M's.



answers from Cleveland on

Let him go to the store and pick out undies and and seat that goes on the toilet and a soap dispenser and then pick a weekend and do it. Throw diapers out. No pull ups. Take every half hr and make him at least sit. Or you could throw w couple fruit loops in the bowl and have him stand up and aim for them after a week of no accidents let him go and pick out something cool. ( for our daughter she got to pick out big girl bedding) but let him pick out the things he will be using while going potty



answers from Chicago on

If he is peeing right after getting off the toilet, he is working out the muscle control. Just hang in there, and he will get it soon. I'd work on poop training...tell him about the pressure, watch him, and get him on the pot.


answers from Chicago on

Some kids, such as my middle child, for example would stay in diapers until college if you let them. Once they turn 3 and show signs of awareness (like telling you he's going in his diaper and asking for the potty) then you know they are physically ready.

This is what I did with my middle child when he was 3.5 and still not wanting to use the potty:

I told him that he was a big boy, and they don't make diapers for big boys. I had him watch me throw the diapers away. We pulled the underwear out of the drawer and he picked the pair he wanted. We went downstairs and got the kitchen timer out. We filled his sippy cup with lots of fruit punch (his favorite juice), covered the couches and carpet with towels and got to work! The timer would go off every 15-20 minutes and we'd have to go up to the bathroom. He didn't like the timer and would resist, but I didn't give him a choice. I kept reminding him of all of the things he couldn't do until he went potty (play in the playroom, play on the computer, play outside etc..)

Two days, and a few accidents later he was trained. I used the same method with my youngest and it worked just as well. It only took one day with him.

Best of luck!



answers from San Francisco on

My daughter will be three at the end of October, but she starts preschool on 9/12 and has to be fully potty trained by then. She also has zero interest. I just took away the diapers and pull ups and have her wear underwear full time at home. The first day I think we went through at least 7 pairs of underwear (this was about three weeks ago). She's doing much better now. Sometimes she still fights and cries and refuses to sit, but she doesn't have accidents too often. Yesterday, I started with underwear out of the house too. When she has a pull up on, she doesn't even try.

Anyway, whether he likes it or not, I say just do it. He'll get tired of peeing in his pants soon enough. Poop may take longer, but he'll figure it out.


answers from Santa Fe on

Well, I don't know if I can help you but I just wanted to say my son (my first) was not interested in potty training so we just dropped the subject. I'd read books about it and sometimes talk about how big kids use the potty (in an encouraging way) and when he is ready he will too. I signed him up for preschool and took him for a quick visit when he was 3. He was starting in the fall when he was 3.5 and he knew he could not go unless he was potty trained. The teacher told him this on the tour. He saw some toys there he really really wanted to play with. I had pretty much given up hope of him potty training in time but I kept reminding him. A week before school started when he was 3.5 he potty trained himself in one day. He was ready...he was just choosing not to use the potty. Those toys he saw at the preschool were a motivator for him! I will say that his natural personality is VERY strong-headed and stubborn. He never wants to give in. This child knows how to drive his parents nuts at times. He's 9 now and still a very strong-headed kid, just like his dad and grandpa. Ugh. If I had pushed potty training he would have pushed right back and would have done anything not to lose the "battle". That is just how he is. For his personality, not pushing works better. Things have to be his idea. As I write this I am thinking of grandpa (my husband's dad)...he is the stubbornest person ever. If something is not his idea he will not even entertain doing it. He passed on his genes to his grandson that's for sure. (Also, so you know, my son did not night train until halfway through kindergarten, which I hear is normal for many boys)

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