Potty Training - Portsmouth, RI

Updated on September 10, 2008
M.M. asks from Portsmouth, RI
18 answers

My daughter is now 2 and a half, she has shown some interest in using the potty. Two weeks ago she used her little potty by herself 2 times in one hour, we congratulated her and made a big to do and even went out and got her a "prize" for doing pee pee on the potty. The problem is now even with no diaper all day, when she has to go she will ask for a diaper, if we ignore her request for a diaper and incourage the use of the potty she just gets upset. I hate to make her wait too long fearing a UTI.
Anyone have any ideas on how to help get her to be a potty pro?
I know she knows when it is time to use the potty...as she is asking for the diaper.

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So What Happened?

It has been a little over a month now and my daughter is doing great! Consistency is the key! She is potty trained for the day right now...still using diapers at night.
She even cries at night when the diaper has to go on even sitting on the potty one more time before deciding herself to get her diaper on and go to bed. It's definately a control thing on her part...but this one I let her take charge of. She is so excited about all her pretty panties that she wants to show everyone. Just a song that I made up to praise her and calling to tell anyone that will listen that she is a big girl and uses the potty seems to be the only reward she is craving.
Good luck to all you moms about to set off on this endevour....stay patient and consistent and you will be on your way to.
Thank you all again for your support and ideas/suggestions, it is just what we needed.

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D.M.

answers from Barnstable on

offer to read her favorite book to her while she sits on the potty. It can become a habit which you don't always want to happen, but it worked for me. After a while my daughter would sit by herself and look at the book while she went potty. She has grown out of this habit. She has never had an accident...

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C.W.

answers from Portland on

I would take it calmly, just give her the diaper and mention that when she is a big girl she can use the potty. IT will probably take about a week of conversation about the potty vs diaper before she will feel ready to take the step.

--C.
www.myhomecottagebiz.com

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J.Z.

answers from Boston on

Do yourself a favor and don't bother with pull-ups. I really think they are a mean trick that they play on moms. Even though they are pulling them on like underwear, when they are busy playing and they pee or poop in them it is going to be absolutely no different than a diaper! When they are wearing underwear and they have an accident then it is going to be a mess and pain for them to have to change all of their clothes. They have to learn from their mistakes just like with everything else. The best thing to do when they are showing signs of potty training just go cold turkey. I have three boys and with all of them I waited until they were truly ready and I woke them up in the morning and put underwear on them. When they had to go to the bathroom they would sometimes ask for a diaper and I just told them that I ran out and had to buy some more later. Basically, later just never came. I also think it worked really well to send them to bed in underwear right from the start. After they fell asleep I would put a diaper on over their underwear and I would take it off right before I woke them up in the morning. This worked REALLY well. It also made it so much less confusing to them. Good luck!!

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L.P.

answers from Lewiston on

How about "graduating" her to Big Girl pants, not pull-up diapers, but the ones more like underwear, but with the extra padding for accidents. She'll feel like a big girl, but there will still be that extra back up just in case. Good luck, potty training is a process that sometimes seems like two steps forward, one step back.

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L.W.

answers from Boston on

This is normal. Its not uncommon for them to regress a couple of times. Shes not completely ready yet. Let her have the diaper. As for buying prizes, stick with small stuff, you'll go broke fast(my friend got sm stuff from the dollar store). We used stickers & hershey kisses. We saved the "big" present for poop. Give her time, she'll decided when shes ready. I'm not saying let her be in charge of it, but DO NOT force her yet. Read alot of potty books w/ her, talk about it, how big girls use the potty. Is she going to be going to preschool at all? Tell her she cant go unless she goes on the potty, that they dont allow diapers. It'll happen, just not yet. :)
Seeing what a few of the other moms wrote...... its all good advice, each child is different & not every approach works, but you know how her personality is & what her tolerance is. Good luck!

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J.P.

answers from Springfield on

M. -

I had two very extreme experiences with my two DDs. In fact, at over 4 years old, we are still having problems with our youngest. My best advice to you is let her do it on her own. Give her the diaper, but encourage her to use it int he bathroom. Keep making the suggestion to use the potty, but let her decide when she wants to use it. The more you force her, the longer road you may be on take to get it done. It could also lead to some serious control issue from your DD if she is strong-willed as was my DD2. The experts say there are 3 things kids can control: (1) eating; (2) sleeping; and (3) pottying. Let her get there on her own, even if it means giving her a diaper when she wants one. At least she is not actively defying you and just peeing on the floor.

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C.R.

answers from Boston on

Hi: Let your daughter take the lead on this. Even though you were excited and want to keep up the momentum, she may need to potty train slowly and this is totally normal. The more pressure and expectations that are set up, the more of an "issue" it will become and that may backfire. Good Luck.

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P.A.

answers from Boston on

Well, I don't have advise just some support. My daughter 4 weeks before her 2nd B-day decided to go on the potty. She peed, pooped and had very few accidents for 3.5 weeks then one day out of the blue, no more! Back to diapers! She would just stand there and pee in her undies if she didn't have one on. I don't know what happened.
I bought some small packs of M&M's to give her when she goes. She knows that they are for when she goes on the potty again and is very excited about it but will not go. Sometimes she will sit down on the potty and then when she feels like she is going to go she jumps off and holds herself so that she doesn't go.
I have gotten a ton of advise and the most common one and even from the pediatrician is that you don't want to force it. It is one of the only things in their lives that they have control over so they need to be the one that makes the decision.
Good luck! I am in the same boat as you so don't feel bad! You are not alone!

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

This didn't work for my daughter, but here's what my pedi suggested for my reluctant daughter: Let her wear the diaper to go, but she has to wear the diaper while sitting on the potty. Some kids get scared "letting go" of something that's a part of their body, so this way feels more familiar. After she's done that for a while, just say "oh, now you know how to go, so I stopped buying diapers" or something to that effect. You could still do a reward chart at any point in the process as well. Good luck!

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C.K.

answers from Boston on

I have heard girls are usually ready earlier than boys, my son was 3 when we started potty training and this worked for us. I used pull ups for one week and put him on the potty every hour, he got a sticker for trying and a prize for pee or poop (I even wrapped them)was able to get pee and poop in the potty about half the time. The second week I went cold turkey just underwear and sweatpants easy to get up and down. I kept a stack near the bathroom and followed the same pattern of every hour stickers and presents. The second week went great one or two accidents total. We ran out of prizes and I told him now he is a big boy and he didn't need them. Thought that was going to be a huge meltdown but went fine. Was shocked that after that first week he really did great rarely an accident at all. It has been 4 months now and he even goes on his own we don't even have to prod. Hope this advice helps.

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J.M.

answers from Boston on

Hi. I am of the school of thought that they will potty train when they are ready. You do not want it to become a power struggle because this is one struggle that they completely control. My oldest potty trained 3 weeks after her third birthday. She knew when she had to go, etc. and was ready physically to be potty trained but she still wanted to go in her diapers. I waited until she said she did not want to wear diapers anymore. One morning she woke and said she was a big girl and wanted underwear. That was it!!! There were no accidents EVER. One month later she potty trained at night too...again NO accidents. Basically, just because they are physically ready does not mean they are mentally ready. When both sides are completely ready, it can be a very easy transition.

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

Congratualtions! Sounds like your daughter is on her way! Maybe when your daughter asks for the diaper you can ask her to wait for you on the potty, or sit on it for five seconds while you get the diaper ready? You can make it a long five seconds, and maybe she'll go on the potty while she's waiting. I used to stretch out the time by reading a story to my son. I would not refuse the diaper, so he felt like he was getting his choice, but I delayed giving it to him for a short time and distracted him with a fun book. Reading stories like Once upon a Potty and Sam's Potty inspired him to use his potty. Good luck!

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L.M.

answers from Providence on

Hi M. -
I would let her do it on her own like one of the other mothers said. I was probably a bit more lax (or lazy) on the potty training, and let my kids tell me when they were ready. They were both 3 1/2 years old when they were potty trained, and only took 2 days. I never had to tell them to go to the potty, they just went because their bodies were developed enough to tell them that they had to go.

Both my son and daughter have gone without diapers/pull ups at night two months after they were potty trained, and in a year and a half I have only had 2 accidents w/ my daughter and in 7 months with my son, only one.

Also, every child is different.

Good luck!

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S.F.

answers from Boston on

I too am a big believer in the reward chart. One sticker for each day she has no accidents. After so many stickers (a week, for example), a special star sticker. After so many stars, a trip to the store to pick out something small. I agree with the others that say she is physically ready, but hasn't decided she's ready yet. A reward chart might give her incentive. Good luck!

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A.G.

answers from Lewiston on

I copied this from another post i responded to and removed what doesn't apply to your situation.
Other than that

#1 keep him in UNDERWEAR all day no more pull-ups
#2 Stay consistant
#3 don't make a fuss over accidents simply tell/help him cleanup into fresh clothes(stock up on laundry soap)
#4STICKERS may lead to a bigger treat like a new toy buy one with her and tell her if you have no accidents for 1 week youg et the prize &
#5 give her the stickers to earn the prize if she at least sits on the potty Hey this ain't the military and she is getting the point.
#6 She may not be quite ready yet keep trying.
#7 None of this has helped with my 2 year old son yet but it did work VERY well with my older 3 kids. They all got it in a day or two....So I thinkhe just isn't there just yet.
I hope this helps and keep us up dated :)

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E.S.

answers from Boston on

Tell your daughter she'll be a big girl if she does.Incourge her to be brave and she'll be a big girl.

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A.C.

answers from Bangor on

hi M., I was reading. Your little girl was just like mine. But you know something. You put panties on her and put clothes on her like normal, when she needs to go to the bathroom she will go or she will get wet and They do not like that at all. Because then there jeans and legs and feet all get wet if she does go in her pants she will only do it once.

Good Luck
A.
www.themomteam.com/achabre
[email protected]____.com

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E.C.

answers from Boston on

Do you have any other kids around that wear undies like a neighbor or friend. my daughter at 22months decided she wanted to wear her undies that we had bought like 2 months before because my neighbors 3year old started to wear her undies. I then encouraged her becasue so and so goes on the potty. I personally don't believe in pull ups because they are just like a diaper and expensive so I would take her to the store and let her pick out special big girl undies with her favorite thing on them. My daughter also didn't really care about candy so she got a piggy bank and each time she went I gave her a coin to put in(whatever I had around she didn't care if it was a penny or quarter) but she nows that she is saving her money. I hope this helps alittle

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